A/N: A little break has finally got me back into my writing groove and I was super happy to write a Billy chapter. Thanks for reading and hope you enjoy the read. I'd love to know your thoughts on this one as I'd like to develop writing from Billy's perspective a bit more :)
~Billy~
I swore to God, Max's skateboard was going to be in pieces when He and Susan left for their night away. I had specifically told her that if she wasn't in time to be picked up, she was walking home. Or skateboarding home. Whatever way she got back, it wasn't going to be in my fucking car. What I hadn't expected was for the little shit to not show up at all. As I stood outside by the Camaro, the needle on my watch seemed to grow faster and faster as time marched on. Time was of the essence with Him and she goddamn knew it. Max knew what would happen if we weren't at home by the time He was. Yet, for some unknown reason, she still decided to put this to the test. I was more than pissed off - I was fucking furious. No matter how much I tried to soothe this inferno burning inside of me - chain smoking, letting the flame from my lighter linger just that little bit longer under my fingers - it wasn't enough.
Max knew what the consequences were.
She had seen it for herself.
Heard the yells, snap of the belt, punches thrown.
And still, somehow, she did not give a single shit.
No, she was late. More than late. She wasn't goddamn there after 15 minutes of waiting around. Now, not only did I have to get home on time, but I had to think of an excuse for her absence. Usually, it would have been a case of telling Him she was at the arcade, but she was due to go to some surprise slumber party Susan had arranged with those girl's mothers. She had told me this morning with this excited, shrill voice. I should have told her how the same girls had made Max cry yesterday. But, He was there. Listening, waiting. Watching every reaction as it manifested on my face. So instead of revealing the truth, I stayed neutral. Poker face, a subtle nod of approval. Whatever could keep the peace as we ate. Arguments during breakfast were a precursor for worse episodes later.
Another reason I was pissed off was because I had been in a relatively good mood all day until she didn't show up. Seeing Sierra tell Bryony to essentially get the cork out of her obnoxious asshole was just about the best thing I had seen so far in this hick-town. Additionally, I just enjoyed being in her company. She understood me and it seemed like the feeling was reciprocated. I had told her I couldn't meet up after school because I had to get Max as she was off to a slumber party. Pepsi, or Mountain Dew, I couldn't really remember what soft drink she'd named herself after, was entertaining enough. Anyone who had the balls to not conform to the status quo was good in my books. Whilst I was remaining cautious about Harrington, he gave me a free ticket to the Indiana Hoosiers game so I couldn't exactly argue. Besides, if Harrington knew what was good for him, he would keep his eyes and hands off my girl. Tommy and Ray attempted to persuade me in Math class after lunch to abandon the group. Apparently they 'sensed' Sierra and her friend were about to become outcasts. However, I merely snorted and told them to get a grip. High school won't be around forever, boys. Get used to people telling you that when you're at a boring desk job bemoaning about how good the glory days were. Or they'll straight up tell them to get the fuck over themselves. Either way, Tommy and Ray were going to be stuck in a constant loop of living out their days trying to relive being the top dogs. Essentially, they were going to forever be pathetic pieces of shit.
So, here I was, pacing around in the kitchen desperately trying to think of a plausible excuse for Max's absence after being specifically told there was no time for the arcade. To the bookcase of old recipe books, past the stove, to the immaculate sink. I had done at least ten laps. He and Susan were late back. She had a trial shift today at the local diner and He was picking her up. They weren't aware of this, but they were buying me time. She could have been doing extra studying for a test with those nerd friends of hers. That wouldn't fool Him. It would fool Susan, but not Him. Alright, what if I said to Him she was at the arcade, but I was going to pick her up and drop her off at that slumber party? You know, He and Susan would be able to get all packed up and away in time that way. I could work this one.
Would he counter any of this?
But I specifically told you to bring her back, Billy.
I was trying to do a nice thing. Show Him this town was starting to change me. Respect and responsibility.
But you didn't respect what I had asked you to do in the first place, did you?
Fuck. This could either go one or two ways. Personally, I didn't want to be in this situation in the first place. Max fucking knew what would happen on any normal day. If she wanted to go to the arcade, we had to come home first to greet Him back, then we went once He had seen she'd finished her homework. Never mine. No, He couldn't care less about whether I'd completed it or wiped my ass with it. Why did Max have to be so fucking stupid? She seemed to have a little something in her brain, so why the hell did she pull this stunt on me? Depending on His mood, which I could foreshadow 9 times out of 10 after breakfast, just me being home was enough. But today was not that day.
Just as I started to mentally rehearse what to say to Him, I heard the door creak open. In the corner of my eye as I frantically paced up and down, I caught red hair glinting in the low sun and froze. Mirroring me, Max also stood still, nearly tripping over her feet as she discovered herself in the firing line of my glare.
"What fucking time do you call this, Max?" I shouted. Silence was her response. Slowly, she started to put her bag down. "You really want to push your goddamn luck, huh? Pick the bag up"
As Max began picking her bag up, I was on the verge of exploding. All of this distress had made me want to tear the house to shreds. Feeling myself stew in this panic had triggered this berserker mode. She needed to get it in her head that actions have consequences. He would never let her experience the consequences. Nor did I want that for her. She was a kid. But so was I once upon a time and He never let it be an excuse. I would never hit a girl. No, that wasn't my style at all. She had to learn how things worked in this house. If it had to be me causing an argument to get that into her head, then so be it.
I opened my mouth, ready to unleash hell when every word I could spit out was stolen from me. Behind Max, with a raised brow and leaning against the doorframe, was Sierra.
What the fuck was Nightingale doing here?
Immediately, I forced myself to slacken. This was not good at all. He and Susan would be home any moment. He had told me to stay away from Nightingale and here she was in the goddamn house when He could make an entrance any time now.
Shit, shit, shit.
"What are you doing here, Sierra?" My voice was low, borderline threatening. My entire body had stiffened, an ice cold chill coursing down my spine. She couldn't be here. Not when He was going to show up. There would be too many questions. The implication of her being here was enough to get His mind conjuring up things.
"Dropping Max off. Is that a problem?" Her whole stance changed from casually leaning against the door with a smile to arms crossed assertively, a stern look in her eyes.
"No" I sighed sharply and pinched the bridge of my nose, skin crinkling around my eyes as I shut them tightly. I didn't want to be an asshole towards her, but I also didn't want Him knowing the truth and putting any hope of continuing to date her in jeopardy. Why did this have to be so hard? Noticing how my muscles had tightened again, I coerced myself into relaxing. If you continue this way, she'll be gone. "Thanks for dropping her off. I couldn't wait around today" Think of an excuse. You can't tell her what goes on here. She'll run for the hills. "Had to make sure this place is clean before the folks head off"
With an inquisitive glint in those green eyes, she arched her brows. The rhythm of her tapping foot quickened and her throat produced this doubtful 'Hm' sound. I stared at her and forced my lips into a cheeky smirk. She wasn't falling for the lie whatsoever. Perhaps the charm would help smooth this issue out. Advancing her, I reached out and lightly stroked her arm, feeling how silken her bronzed skin was. Being able to openly do this before He arrived helped me to compose myself a little.
"In the future, feel free to tell me so she's not just waiting around" Sierra said and nodded to Max. "Are you okay with that?"
"Tubular" Max shrugged and bounded upstairs with her bag. Tubular. What a fucking word. I opened my mouth to get Max back down here so she could say thank you. However, Max poked her head back around the curve up the stairs, loose and messy ginger curls falling over her face. "Thanks for the ride, Sierra" She was about to turn back when she snapped around again. "Oh, and your brother is ridiculously cool"
"I'm sure he appreciates someone else letting him indulge in his dinosaur fascination" she laughed. As I peered over Sierra's shoulder, I saw Zack waving manically at me. Giving a slight wave back, I poked my tongue out at him. Immediately this was met by the kid blowing the biggest raspberry he could manage. God, Sierra was going to hate me. He'd gotten spit all on the window. However, she just laughed contentedly and turned to me. Just when I thought I was in the clear, she put her hands boldly on her hourglass hips. Perhaps I wasn't quite in her good books yet. Damn it, she really was getting used to the old charm. "So, what was the real reason?"
"What?" I scoffed, half-heartedly putting any effort into this facade. "Are you trying to judge my cleaning skills?" To be fair, the place was pretty immaculate. But this had nothing to do with me. Nope, that was Susan's domain. Feeling the heat from her unwavering stare, I let out a slight laugh and tousled my hair. Part of it was from the pressure I was under as I knew she had seen through me, but she was goddamn hot when she looked like this. Shit, I couldn't think of this right now. There was too much that would give me away, and not just the obvious. "Come on, Sierra. Give me a break. The kid was late"
"I would like to think you're the kind of person who could give a little leeway, Billy" she paused, examining my response. I actually felt my cheeks starting to glow a bright red. Christ, she really knew how to turn the tables here. She had no idea what repercussions waited for me if we had been late. Thankfully, the bastard was late. But if He hadn't been, there would have been trouble. "Which is what makes me think you left for another reason"
"Maybe you should save the deep analysis for English class, Nightingale" I casually remarked, leaning against the door frame.
She was right and she goddamn knew it. For some reason, I had chosen a girl who was apt at reading minds. Or, perhaps she just had learned enough from her environment to know another person like her when she saw them. Like, really saw them. It was one reason why I had become so interested in her in the first place, what made her stand out from the crowd. And now, her ability to really focus on body language and personalities was doing me zero favors. As I surveyed how she cocked her head and released a stifled laugh, I couldn't help smirk. Sure, I was an audacious bastard when I could be. There was a part of her that craved it. Even when she was clearly irritated, she wanted the shock factor.
"And perhaps you should save your brazen attitude for when it's appropriate, Hargrove" she replied in a brash yet vexed tone. I really should save the lustful thoughts in my mind right now for when it's appropriate too, but some things just can't be helped. "I'm being serious, Billy" Jesus she really could read minds. Or perhaps she caught me biting my bottom lip and not having control where my eyes roamed.
"Okay, okay, you made your point" I huffed and stood up straight, growing closer to her so I could wrap my fingers gingerly around her arm. "Forgive me?"
"It wasn't me who you left to walk home, was it?" she chided and gestured with her head to upstairs.
Max.
God, she really had no idea. I backed away from her, deeply inhaling. I felt my nostrils flare slightly as I sniffed loudly and looked away, biting the inside of my lip. It was infuriating to say the least. She could read me like a book and still the true meaning in between the lines was lost in translation. The uncomfortable annoyance prickled at the lining of my stomach. It wasn't fair to her, of course. I could tell her outright how much of a prick He was. But, the words were imprisoned far down my throat with no chance of seeing the light of day. She would feel sorry for me. That was the one thing she could never do. My girl wasn't going to see me like that. I was there for her. I was going to ensure she was okay. Guys like me don't need that. Not with this shit.
Before I had a chance to say goodbye to her, tell her I would treat her to some breakfast tomorrow, despite the conversation clearly being left open-ended, the low rumble of an engine approached the house.
Fuck.
I couldn't even process how having her here made me feel by the time He got out of the car. He had virtually jumped out, but had done it in an inconspicuous way that said, 'I have no problem with the girl I told you not to see being here on my porch'. The shadow of a glare covered His eyes and as soon as He saw Sierra, He let out a hearty chuckle and plastered a humble smile on His thin lips, outstretching His arms in a warm greeting which screamed pretension. To me at least. But by the way Sierra was flitting her eyes between Him and myself as I stood clenching and unclenching my fists, I suspected she had picked up on it. The girl was smart enough to know someone was fake when she saw it in action. That, and I hadn't realized my lips were slightly gaped, breathing shallow but loud enough for her to hear the trepidation in it. How the fuck was I going to explain this?
"Well, well, Miss Nightingale, what do we owe this honor?" He asked and did that stereotypical perfect father chuckle. The jolly laugh all dad's made when they found their own corny, unoriginal joke hilarious. After all, He had to be Dad now. What a piece of shit. He knew what He was doing. He had to otherwise the jig was up. Even in the most micro of ways, He had to keep up the pretense to masquerade everything behind it. "Billy," He started, letting the veil slip for just a second as His stern eyes narrowed. It wasn't even noticeable to the naked eye, but I knew what that look meant. "Have you not even invited Miss Nightingale in for a drink?"
Miss Nightingale.
Shit, he really was going for that promotion.
"Oh, we have some lovely iced tea in here, honey" Susan chimed in, peeking over His shoulder as if she was hiding from any interaction He dominated.
"Yes, Susan makes up a fresh jug every morning. You really should come in and have some. In fact," Again, He turned to me, beckoning me to come out onto the porch. A real family portrait. One where no one would see the tiny cracks until decades later. I glanced at Sierra who watched as I slowly walked into His dark silhouette. With a heavy hand, He patted my shoulder, leaving it there. I could feel his fingers clench around it. "I'm surprised my son didn't invite you in already. I'm sorry, every now and then Billy just forgets his manners. Don't you, son?" He wanted me to speak up. To apologize for not inviting her in and offering her some refreshing, sweet iced tea. I looked at Sierra again and smiled, shaking my head with a chuckle.
"Yeah," I started, clearing my throat of the acrid rage I was desperately trying to contain. I wanted to kill Him there and then. Catapult His weak body off the porch and pummel it until I could see the life leaving Him, drifting up as dust particles under the sunset's shadow. Here goes nothing. The words had resentfully formed and were on the tip of my tongue.
I'm sorry for not inviting you in for iced tea, Sierra.
"Really, thank you, Mr Hargrove. That's very kind of you and your wife, but to be honest, I'd just come by to drop off the book Billy and I are reading in English at the moment" She let out a small laugh and got the book out. Brave New World. The book she was reading in the car the day I met her. We had never covered this book in English, nor were we going to this semester. But she had felt how this was her cue to intervene. "He was rushing to get Max so she'd be ready for the slumber party tonight and left it behind, so I thought I'd drop it off. He was so busy cleaning up a little that he didn't have a chance to invite me in. So, here's the book!"
She passed it over to me, and I looked up from the floor at her, my eyes twinkling with all the gratitude I could convey at this moment in time. I didn't even have to see Him to know He was trying to hide embarrassment. He would only pick at small things for this. For being shown up in front of His wife and the son He knew would relish this. It could all come out later, but for now, I knew He would have a night away from me and it would simmer. He and Susan would have a bottle of champagne, He'd fuck her to let out his frustrations, and then He'd fall asleep face down on the pillow. It would be too late tomorrow for Him to make a deal out of this. Besides, what could He do to excuse it this time? His boss' daughter had told him indirectly to shut his fucking mouth? There was always an excuse, but this one He had never encountered. It had bewildered Him and unless He was clear on something, He would do nothing but bicker. I would stay quiet, let Him have the moment with the full knowledge I had truly won.
"Anyway, thank you again for the offer, Mr and Mrs Hargrove, but my little brother is in the car and we usually go for cookie dough at the diner after school on a Tuesday. He gets a little unsettled if his routine is broken" Sierra explained. One more time, she extended her thanks to Him and Susan who responded with over-the-top 'Any time, the door is open!' and other words to that effect.
"Ooh, I recently got a job at the diner, Sierra, so I could always sneak you a little discount" Susan gave a wink. Half of her was trying to be kind, the other half wanted to win over His affection. A pat on the back for Mrs Hargrove, a job well done. However, her giggles deflated when He made it clear she hadn't won Him over.
"Thank you for stopping by, Miss Nightingale" He curtly said with enough kindness to make it seem just about genuine. "Get home safely"
"Thank you, I hope you both have a nice trip" She turned to me, and for a moment seemed reluctant, but in the end, she chose to wrap her arms around me in a platonic hug. Only in the final seconds of it did she give me a tight, reassuring squeeze. A secret between the two of us in plain sight. "See you at school tomorrow, Billy. I've marked the pages Simpson wants us to read"
And with that, she was gone and off into her car.
I tried to stifle a smile, but as soon as I heard her curse to herself when Blondie blared out, I lowered my head and quietly laughed to myself. Zack frantically waved and I could audibly hear him say, 'He didn't do the voice!'. Okay, the kid was pretty sweet. That was all he was getting from me.
Now, it was just Him, Susan and I stood out on the porch. An unspoken anger was bubbling away. Either way, He had been put in His place. Despite reveling in the glory as it happened, I was starting to see the tale-tell signs of Him being close to the edge. Not only had someone younger told Him a truth He didn't want to hear, it had been from a woman. And not just any woman. The daughter of the guy who pays for the very porch He was on as He stood there and took it.
"'Sneak you in a little bit of discount'? Goddamn it, Susan, that girl could probably get her daddy to pay for the whole darn menu!" He snapped and after He had poured a large glass of whiskey, started muttering all kinds of shit under His breath. Looks like the iced tea wasn't all that good after all. "And you," He pointed at me, red fury seeping over his face "you just stood there and made me look like an idiot!" He paused, awaiting for the usual backlash. Instead, I remained quiet. Smug and content to have seen Him so uncomfortable earlier. "You could have said something about cleaning the house!"
A few more moments of silence. Just to really see Him squirm.
"You didn't ask" I responded.
There were no retorts, no attempt made to even open His mouth. He marched out of the room, muttering how I was going to make Him late for His and Susan's restaurant reservation. Susan flinched as He barked at her to get ready. Wow, this had really triggered Him off. It was fucking good to see.
"Thank you for sorting things out, Billy" Susan sweetly said and stroked my shoulder before obeying His orders.
Of course, I hadn't done a single thing. Sierra had definitely saved my ass though, that's for certain. I wondered how many times she had to think on the spot to rectify situations, to prevent the worst outcome from becoming a reality. She'd been convincing. There was a part of me that resented how she had to step in like that. Again, I wanted to protect her. Not the other way around. Either way, I was dropping by hers tonight to say thank you.
Chuckling to myself as I entered my room, I started getting ready. A new, red shirt, leather jacket. The usual hair routine, just one curl over my forehead. None of Harrington's shit. Dabbing cologne on my chest, I looked in the mirror and smirked at my reflection. Well, I was going round to say thank you… in whatever way she wanted me to. Discreetly, I shoved my hand down my pants and spruced up a little. Even if she she didn't want to, it still helped me smell good. Finally, I popped some gum on the tip of my tongue, flicking it back into my mouth. I winked, giving myself the all clear to head out.
As I closed my door, I heard Max moaning about how she didn't want to go to the slumber party. I felt bad for the kid. All those girls were going to rip the shit out of her and there was nothing we could do about it. He would get the morning report from all the mommies on how Max was during the night. I'd already heard how He'd given the hotel phone number to the girl's parents in case of an emergency. Typical, He had to control everything. Max bombed downstairs in an obvious huff, her stuff already packed for her. Susan had bought her some new pajamas, apparently. I dreaded to think after the dress fiasco. I followed suit, grabbing my car keys and swallowing the last few sips from a can of Coke I had forgotten about. He and Susan stood in the kitchen, the iced tea finally making its appearance. Besides, if it was going to be bigged up to that extent, may as well.
"What's the girl's address?" I asked, much to Susan's surprise. "I'll drop her off, let you two get to your restaurant reservation"
Susan looked at Him, looking for approval. With a grunt and nod, He bestowed it to her.
"Oh, yes please, Billy. That would be wonderful" she replied and wrote it down for me. She had baked some fresh cookies before her trial shift at the diner, so I grabbed one for myself and Max as I received the piece of paper. The kid was going to need it if she was going to survive those girls.
"Respect and responsibility, right?" I took a bite out of one of the cookies and winked. He choked slightly on His iced tea, his face reddening with glorious anger.
Jesus, He was really seething now.
And with that, I walked out the door.
We got into the car and I gunned the engine, blasting Rebel Yell. I vigorously tapped the palm of my hand against the steering wheel to the drum's beat and rolled down my window when we reached the intersection, tossing the cookie out. I'd only taken one bite. Sure, Susan made great cookies but seeing the look on His face was even greater. Max sat sullen next to me, folded arms and a jutted lip to show she was feeling sorry for herself. Hell, even I felt a little sorry for her. She was going to have a shit night. But hey, perhaps she would have the balls to tell the girls where to stick it.
"Enjoy your ride back home?" I asked, eyes fixated on the distance. Fields and more fields. Leave the excitement to those you least expect it from. "Don't make a habit of it"
No response.
"Listen to me, Max" I snapped.
She had to learn we got off lucky this time. I got off lucky this time. This was a random occurrence. Sierra was my girl and as long as she was, I wanted to keep her away from Him. Away from seeing what He was like. More to the point, I wasn't going to let her feel like she had to help me. I could fight my own battles. This was going to be the last time she had to put herself in that position.
"I am listening" she murmured.
"Then wipe that sulky look off your face and pay attention. This is real shit, Max. You know what happens" I said with an intentionally threatening tone. The message had to get through to her. One day, it may be her who deals with Him. I'd step in, but what if I wasn't there and it just happened? He'd shown me with Mom how he wasn't afraid to hit a woman. She may be safe for now, but one day it was possible she would be late from school and find herself on the receiving end for once. If she learned now, the less likely any harm would happen. "So, get to my car on time. There's only so many times the arcade excuse works"
"Yeah" Max responded.
"As much as I hate to say it, we're family now," I lit up a cigarette and balanced it in between my teeth, flicking it around "and we gotta look out for each other" Blowing out a cloud of smoke, I lazily moved my eyes to see the reality of our situation soak in for her. "So, you're gonna get to my car on time and leave Sierra out of this"
"Yeah, sure" she muttered. After a few seconds had elapsed, she turned to me. "She seems nice"
"That's because she is" I paused to take another drag of my cigarette, hands rapping away at the wheel. "Which is why I want to keep her out of this"
"Because Neil doesn't want you dating her?" I hadn't explicitly mentioned anything to Max about Sierra being my girl, so I was sort of surprised to hear her say this. Moreover, I was intrigued at what or who gave it away. I raised my eyebrow at her, about to delve into how she had figured it out. "Billy, you don't share your cigarettes with anyone" She paused and let out a loud laugh. "You're actually nice to her"
"Hey, shitbird, I am nice" I countered. Even still, I couldn't help but smile and chuckle. "Well, you keep that to yourself or I'm not taking you to the arcade anymore"
"I can skateboard there" Max snorted and slouched back in her seat. "I'm not going to tell"
"I'm holding you to that, Max" I said.
We fell into a silence and before I knew it, we had pulled up to the girl's house. Max sighed heavily and went to get out of the car when I tapped her arm.
"Give those bitches hell if they start, alright?" I told her.
With a fleeting smile, she nodded and went up to the door. I watched as the mom, a woman in her late 30s who had already had work done to her face as if she was 20 years older, greeted her with dramatically fake excitement. Rolling my eyes, I slammed my foot on the accelerator and sped off.
First stop, the flower stall.
Second stop, the 7-Eleven to pick up some beer.
Third stop, my girl's house.
