Chapter 22 "It's A Mistake" Early November 1983
(Song suggestion- "It's A Mistake" by Men At Work)
Ray
Although we didn't know the specifics, it was evident that the Egon and Janine romance had become consequential. The new couple had become more affectionate and their interactions a little more intimate in public. In the past couple of weeks, Spengler would hold her hand for a short time occasionally while he was talking to her, and once or twice I had seen J give him a quick kiss before she left for the day.
"Ccrrrreeeeaaakkkk!"
The door downstairs vociferously unlatched, and we heard our business partner's heavy footsteps on the floor then halt. It was about a quarter to five in the afternoon.
"Egon Spengler! Are you back?" Peter yelled over the stair railing as the physicist strode to his office. Inquisitive, I took a drag from my smoke and joined my coworker as our usually immaculately dressed genius ascended the lengthy staircase dressed almost like a bum. It indicated that the two lovers were rolling around together on a bed or the floor clothed (or not).
"Holy crap," I declared noisily, feeling my eyes bulge out of their sockets at their appearance.
Egon wore a wrinkled white button-down shirt half-tucked into his pants and halfway untucked, and the buttons were not matched evenly. Moreover, his hair appeared out of place because it uncharacteristically stuck out in places. Our friend's face had the dark stubble of a five o'clock shadow, and on his arm, he held his heavily creased tuxedo jacket. Spengler's typically grave expression looked distinctly joyful as there was a twinkle in his eyes.
"What the..," Peter uttered, his mouth dropped open. Iggy quietly reached the staircase like he was coming back from his office dressed in his ordinarily neat manner. He also seemed dazed and unaware of his surroundings, but this time, science wasn't the reason. Egon strode past us, and I noticed there was lipstick on his shirt collar.
"Holy moly, did you get some," Venkman snidely inquired, after I pointed it out to him with a cunning grin on my lips. Then, I took a long drag on my cigarette and exhaled again.
Angrily, Iggy spun around on his heel and spat out,
"I will kick your a— if you say that again, not just push you up against the wall like last time."
Our business partner Egon Spengler had a formidable countenance on his face. That frightened Pete clearly by his agape mouth and very wide-open eyes. For a second or two, the two friends faced off until our leader apologized. Pete appeared both baffled and nervous at the same time, and Spengler's aura was very similar to the one when Venkman called J a bi—- a month ago. Egon walked to the refrigerator and retrieved a Diet Coke then he lowered himself into a chair at the kitchen table. A few beats behind him, we followed, bemused.
"What time is your train to Albany," I questioned, changing the subject to ease the tension. I put my cigarette out in the ashtray on the table, and flipped open an engineering magazine I had found there.
"Seven fifteen. I didn't realize it was so late," Egon nonchalantly replied, peeking at his watch on his left hand but he didn't look worried. Usually, he liked to be extremely early before traveling. Iggy stood to retrieve a pack of twinkies from the cupboard then returned to his seat before opening them.
"Spengs," Pete deliberately asked, "what the hell happened? I mean, since the two of you had your date on the roof, you have been more relaxed and happy."
Venkman glanced at me as he opened the door to the fridge and asked, "Beer, Ray?"
I shook my head as Lucy and I went to a famous upscale bar last night after the gala and drank too much. As a result, my head was aching, and my wallet was empty.
"Can you be more specific," The theoretical physicist requested, raising his right thick eyebrow. He had half of a Twinkie left in his hand, and then put it into his mouth to eat.
"Stantz reported to us that you and Janine left in a hurry last night, then you didn't return home until now. I never saw you like this even when you were 'dating' the artist," Peter mentioned slyly and smiled like a cat who ate a canary.
Distractedly, Iggy looked down at his shirt and noticed the mismatched buttons like he didn't believe Venkman.
"Oh, I didn't notice."
"And you were in Brooklyn last night," I added, pretending to use her nasally accent, causing a grin from our psychologist.
"What are you asking exactly," Iggy inquired, there was a mischievous grin on his lips, and it was evident that he knew what we were implying.
"Please be conscientious of how you do it."
"Checkmate, Egon," Peter quipped, rethinking his comment.
Egon's expression didn't change on his long face as he explained after a short hesitation
"Janine invited me to her apartment after we left, and I agreed."
He hid an authentically joyful smile from his lips. However, it failed imperfectly.
We stared at our colleague, and he glanced bashfully at us for a moment before looking at his package of twinkies. Half of them were gone already.
"That's it, something is wrong with you," Pete jokingly announced, twisting the beer bottle open and taking a sip before feeling our friend's head with the back of his hand dramatically.
"Come on, Venkman," the physicist groaned in protest, then finished his snack.
"You look more gleeful than I have ever seen you," Venkman pretentiously said.
Swiftly, I went down the stairs to get the PKE meter from Spengler's office and hurried upstairs. Iggy smirked at me when he saw the meter and almost chuckled as he completed his last Twinkie.
"Shut up, Spengs, this is serious," Peter joked, but he made a sign indicating I was nuts.
I switched the PKE meter on, impatiently waited for it to warm up, and finally waved it in front of our friend. Disappointingly, there wasn't any reading. Egon wasn't possessed, and Peter shook his head at me scanning the erudite Ghostbuster after running his hand through his balding hair. Our psychiatrist was only two years older than me, but he looked closer to Spengler's age of thirty-three with his hair thinning.
"Come on, Ray. It was a joke," Pete remarked with a laugh, reproachfully to me, "nothing is wrong, but I can tell you what is right with my close friend, Dr. Egon Spengler."
"Janine is right for him, " I finished his statement and then stammered, attempting to collect my thoughts despite my head hurting, "her effect on you...I have never seen you act so...so...human... with Janine or even without her around."
Appearing jubilant, Egon did not say anything, pushing up his dark circular glasses with his index finger, and persisting in eating his snack. I quickly rose from his chair at the table, jogged to our shared room, grabbed my Nikon camera, and snapped a picture of him. The flash blinded him a little, but I successfully captured the moment.
"Documentation," I quipped, out of breath, giving our theoretical physicist a wink.
Egon
The phone rang, breaking the temporary silence in the room as Peter and Ray were grilling me for details with Janine.
"Is it Juliet," Peter questioned, then he made annoying kissing noises with his lips to tease me before actually answering the phone. Shrugging, I didn't verbally answer him.
"Hello? Yeah, he's right here. Ray, it's your sister."
The good natured Ghostbuster rose from his seat and retrieved the phone from Peter.
"Are you a couple now?" My oldest friend questioned me as he lowered himself in a seat next to me. He reached into his slack's pocket and retrieved his cigarette pack and packet of matches. Soon there was a cloud of smoke coming from his area as he blew it into the air above me because he knew it made me ill.
"Huh," I questioned frantically, running my left hand through my dark hair, and a frown appeared on my lips because I hadn't thought about that yet.
"Nevermind, Spengs. Can I at least say I told you so? I knew that Janine would be great for you," Peter quizzed me with a severe countenance for once. Next, he took another drag from his smoke with a slight smirk on his lips as he awaited an answer from me.
"Go ahead," I urged with a slight chuckle.
" I told you so, Egon Spengler," Pete ragged on me in jest, " the first time that I have ever proved you wrong since I have known you."
"Feels good, huh," I acknowledged with a wide smile.
"Something did happen last night, though, right," he suggested, hitting me on the arm.
"Yes, but not what you are thinking," I replied, blushing as I recalled undressing Janine gingerly, exploring her beautiful body everywhere.
Memories of causing the delightful redhead coming to an orgasm and the way she moaned returned to my mind. Then I envisioned Janine's two alluring pink lips perpetually, and I desired to kiss her all over again. Truthfully, I was afraid to admit that I was maybe addicted to it. Maybe to Janine.
"Peter, in all...Uhm.. seriousness, I care...Ahem...profoundly for Janine. You can't insult her," I schooled him with a stern expression on my face, and Ray hung up the phone.
"Oh, don't worry, I won't because I have learned my lesson, Iggy. Yes, it's pronounced that the two of you admire each other sharply," Venkman promised, his eyes wide open. He tapped his cigarette to eliminate the extra ash in the ashtray.
"I'm a very slow learner when it comes to love and Janine," I disclosed, with a half-smile, standing up to go to take a shower after excusing myself.
Peter
"Jesus," I declared in disbelief to Ray after he hung up the phone, "did you see that?"
"Spengler? Yes, that's why I got the PKE. Did you see the look in his eye when he warned you?"
"Duh, Ray. That's why I didn't say what I wanted to originally. Iggy would have killed me," I answered sarcastically, "I have to hand it to Janine, and she has him wrapped around her finger now."
Ray smiled in agreement, lighting up a smoke, and commented, "It appears so."
After a while, he inquired after he exhaled a big cloud of smoke,
"Do you think they have finally admitted they are in love with each other and did the 'deed'?"
"The 'deed'? Are we in middle school, Raymond," I drily scolded him, causing his chubby face to blush as a result of my comment.
"I don't think we will ever know. Egon won't divulge much, and I doubt we will hear much from Brooklyn," I concluded, shrugging my shoulders and then drinking my beer.
Egon
After I gathered fresh clean clothes to change into for my trip to Albany, I was hesitant to remove the shirt that Janine had so tantalizingly caressed to arouse me. It smelled heavenly, and just like her, so I took a deep inhalation of it. Janine had also kissed my neck with her ruby lipstick while accidentally making marks on the shirt collar but I didn't mind. Still, I eventually took it off, gradually sliding it off of my body.
A picture of Janine flashed in my mind- one of her in that sexy, almost see-through 'Goddess' dress.
"It accentuated her beauty," I thought as I switched on the water in the shower and waited for it to heat up. Sighing, I put the shirt down after smelling Janine's scent on it one more time and put it in the hamper. I turned around and tested the water with my hand after pulling the black shower curtain back. The water was warm enough for me to commence showering, so I unbuttoned and unzipped my pants before pulling them off, and then I removed my socks.
" What does Janine see in me, " I wondered as I saw a nude thin man with poor vision and dark hair. Suddenly I heard her voice say as if it were magic in my ears,
"I care so much about you, Egon Spengler, for the way you are, the man you are."
Janine's reason for her affection mystified me because I disbelieved that such a beautiful and charming woman could feel that way about me. Her reassurance of her affection for me made me giddy like a child opening gifts on Christmas.
Entering the shower, I moved underneath the shower head to carefully wet my body. The hot water felt soothing on my skin as I lathered my hair with shampoo as I pondered my past decision to forgo sexual activities in favor of reason and control. Now it almost seemed trivial to do so because. My life was already out of control in my own way. Why forgo sexual pleasure?
Besides, I had admitted my intense feelings to Janine. My desire to lose myself in her almost dominated me. Almost. I persisted in contemplating my quagmire as I finished my shower, dried off, dressed and began to pack for my trip, but did not arrive at any solutions.
With the old Grandfather clock chiming six o' clock in the evening, I was prepared to go in fifteen minutes with Ray. I grabbed a Diet Coke from the fridge and made an easy conversation with Ray about a new idea for a piece of ghostbusting equipment. Again, I realized that I still had to complete my presentations for this week.
Wasn't this similar to cramming for a test last minute?
I could do this all tonight as long as I could keep my mind off Janine. Our genuine heartfelt emotions for each other made it practically impossible for me to cease my thoughts about it as I longed for her.
"Are you ready for the conference," Ray inquired, interrupting my thoughts.
"Not really. I'm too preoccupied with... Uhm... Janine and unprepared," I replied, but it was a welcome distraction.
"You will be fine, Egon. I wish I could go with you, but we can't leave Venkman alone," he stated disappointedly.
Janine
As I drifted on cloud nine for the rest of Sunday evening, Wendy and I gossiped about my darling, Egon. I was supposed to complete some homework, but that just didn't happen. Blissfully, I dreamt about a certain theoretical physicist that night.
I braced myself for severe teasing from Dr. Venkman the next morning on the subway ride into Manhattan, and I determinedly made up my mind to disregard him as much as possible. There wasn't any way that he could ruin the mood I was in, and I remembered that with my homework, I had enough to do to keep busy throughout the day if business was slow. Luckily, I saw Ray first when I put my belongings in the lower drawer of my desk as he was in his office. I began my books and homework papers on my desk as he asked,
"Hey Lil sister, are you two a couple now?"
Cheerfully, Ray wore a black t-shirt and khaki pants as he withdrew from his office with a couple of books in his hands as he approached my desk.
"I don't know, maybe," I commented quietly. That was one of the many questions I had wondered about myself, and I lowered myself on my chair then started the computer.
"Why not?" my big brother inquired innocently as I opened one of the three bills that sat on my desk. I would need to mail them today during my lunch hour.
"You know, Egon, he's complicated. We didn't talk about being a couple, though," I stated, with a bit of sadness in my voice that caused my accent to show, but I thought to myself, "I didn't think to ask about it either."
"I know that Peter will be insufferable today because Egon and I had a magnificent time at the gala," I admitted, while I typed in an amount into a spreadsheet after looking at the two other bills.
Nodding, Ray winked at me. Then out of the blue, he put me in a headlock like a big brother and rubbed the top of my head affectionately with his knuckles. I wondered how many times he had done this same action to his younger sister, Lucy.
"Raymond Stantz," I whined teasingly and pushed him playfully away with my hands, "you are messing up my hair."
"Fortunately,your theoretical physicist loverboy is in Albany and can't see it," he joked, chuckling.
"That's it! You can't be friends with Peter anymore; he is corrupting you," I retorted, with a large bright smile on my face, and returned to my work.
"You are beaming like a beacon of light in the darkness whenever we mention Egon," Dr. Venkman jested, descending the staircase, observing Ray's teasing of me with a delighted look on his face.
"Not that nonsense again," I quipped, and went to the safe to retrieve the company's checkbook.
"Tell us, Brooklyn, did he smash your atom just right with his large supercollider," Peter Venkman jested when I returned a couple of minutes later then deposited the checkbook on my desk.
"What?"
Spinning around in astonishment, I found a very sly smile on Pete's overly obnoxious face, and then the punchline hit me. I angrily yelled, "Dr. Venkman!"
"I heard 'Physicists do it one quantum at a time,'" Ray added, his chubby face turning tomato red, guffawing.
Glaring at both of them, I demanded with my hands on my hips, feigning frustration,
"Is this what I have to deal with all week?"
"I heard 'Physicists do it at the speed of light,'" Dr. Venkman howled, his face transformed to a crimson color as he laughed heartily.
Obviously, he disregarded my comment, but I was secretly pleased by their attention.
"'Particle physicists do it energetically,'" Ray screeched out, slapping his knee.
Irked, I retrieved my lunch from my backpack to place in the fridge. I rapidly climbed the stairs to retrieve some coffee as I woke up too late to eat breakfast, dreaming about my smoking hot physicist.
Without Egon to threaten Peter, it would be nearly impossible for him to shut his mouth. That meant a long week for me. I stifled my chuckle to discourage my immature bosses as I reached the top of the stairs, and they were still laughing hysterically. My legs were stiff, and I realized that I had missed a couple of aerobic classes last week because of spending time with Egon. It was worth it, though.
"Janine, Iggy didn't tell us anything, so don't worry. Yesterday, Stantz scanned him with the PKE in case he was possessed," Peter, laughed.
"Mmm," I absentmindedly commented, opening the fridge.
At once, I saw some of Egon's mold samples clearly labeled on the bottom shelf in the back of it, and then I put my packed lunch on a higher one.
"Spores, mold, and fungus," I chuckled ruefully, closing the door and padding to the counter with the coffee pot..
I noticed the guys had made their coffee for once, so I retrieved a coffee mug from the cupboard and poured myself a cup. I took a large sip and sighed, hoping the convention was going well for Egon.
"What did you do to him Saturday night? He seemed jocular almost at the gala, and you looked radiant, and he was stunned by you, more than usual, that is, Brooklyn. And then Iggy came back looking like he had been hit by a tornado while in a daze, and HE didn't even care! What the hell," Ray stated, amazed, as I came downstairs with my coffee cup in hand.
"We had a great time, and thanks for the compliment. I think we worked well together meeting people and handing out business cards," I earnestly said, taking a seat and sipping my coffee. I started the computer and gazed down at my to-do list.
"Melnitz, I am not joking with you. Both Bianca and Lucy were appalled at the difference in his behavior, and they even know Egon a tiny bit," Peter added, and my traitorous big brother agreed with a nod.
"What do you want me to say, Dr. Venkman, that I am trying to change him," I questioned defensively, with a bit of sharpness added to my nasal voice.
"No, I didn't think that at all. Where is that coming from," Peter questioned confusedly, and I shrugged and sipped my coffee. It gave me a pleasant warm feeling as I drank it, savoring every minute.
"Spengs needs to make alterations to his life, and I am pleasantly surprised to see them. I don't think he was or has been joyful no matter what he says, dedicating his life to the pursuit of a Nobel or Physics. You seemed to open his eyes to the fact there are things outside of those areas," he reported, a moment later.
"For the record, I like Egon, how he is," I stated, wide-eyed, with a grave look.
Both of my bosses gave me a meaningful smile and let the subject drop for the time being after Dr. Venkman quipped sarcastically, "Oh, we know."
Peter knocked the jokes off long enough for me to calm down for the rest of the day, but he knew that he could get away with the teasing without Egon there. I attempted not to think about how much I missed him there throughout the day, and I focused on homework to complete by Thursday night when my class met again.
Astonishingly, the week went by quickly even though Peter was ruthless with his teasing. It was now Sunday, and Egon returned today from Albany. My anticipation to see him was tremendous, and I hoped Egon would call me upon his return. I kept my expectations low to avoid disappointment.
"Will Egon avoid me for two weeks like last time because he is overwhelmed again by his emotions? Or will he change his mind," I wondered out loud that night, then pondered the question until I fell asleep.
Egon
On the way to Albany on the train, I spent the evening thinking about Janine and our weekend together. I couldn't concentrate on anything other than sketching the gorgeous woman who was my date at the gala. Janine donned the breathtakingly cream-colored, almost transparent dress with long folds flowing downwards from her slim waist. I gleefully recalled twirling her slowly as I drew during the train ride.
Usually, I enjoy going to conventions because I learned new information in the field. This one, however, was a disaster because I was unprepared and unprofessional. I overslept for a meeting on Monday morning where I was the primary speaker, and I was unprepared for another one later on the weekend. With Janine constantly on my mind, I could barely function.
It was an incredibly distressing experience, and I sharply vowed that it would never happen again. Despite my acute feelings for her, the events at the convention were impermissible and I had to eliminate my relationship with her. This revelation made me sorely disappointed with myself, and I felt poorly about hurting Janine. On the other hand, I wondered if this would somehow affect my ability to receive a Nobel. My career had to be the focal point of my life, and Janine was only a hindrance.
"How was the convention?" Ray inquired when I returned to the firehouse via cab on Sunday afternoon.
"Atrocious. I was ill- prepared for it. First, I overslept on Monday and missed my first talk. Then I was distracted the whole time thinking about Janine," I retorted bitterly, throwing my suitcase on my bed and began emptying my belongings from it. Appalled, Stantz gave me a wide-eyed look instead of saying anything.
" Best of all, others commented upon it, and I was the butt of a couple of colleagues' jokes for the first day. Fortunately, I was able to pull it together," I stated, extremely anguished, feeling my face turn red. I felt my blood pressure rise as I recalled the disastrous first day of the convention.
"That doesn't sound like you at all," he remarked, packing a suitcase for his trip to Albany later. Originally, Ray was going to go for the whole week, but he decided to go only for three days instead. He and Peter had quite a bit of trouble busting ghosts with only two people while I was gone.
"No, it's not me. I can't ever let that happen again, and I am very ashamed of it," I stated through gritted teeth, sitting down on my bed. Peter came into our shared room and inquired about the meetings, and I filled him in on everything.
"Are you going to tell us what happened while you were at Janine's apartment," he asked. At first, I ignored them, thinking it would work as it had in the past. On occasion, that is.
" Why was Peter so obsessed with that information?" I pondered.
Later, Peter brought it up again while I reviewed Ray's last week's busts notes. The youngest Ghostbuster craftily added while raising an eyebrow,
"Don't worry, Iggy, Janine wouldn't say a word about it while you were gone, and we teased her quite a bit."
"My Janine, " I thought to myself, feeling my heartstrings being tugged tenderly.
" There isn't a doubt in my mind that Peter was unrelenting with his teasing of her all week."
"Why are you disregarding us when we ask about Janine," Venkman inquired, interrupting my thoughts as I analyzed Raymond's notes.
"Even though Janine and I had a few memorable dates together, I am convinced that it isn't the best course of action for me in order to reach my career goals," I firmly stated even though I felt a hint of uncertainty in my heart, but I disregarded it.
"What!?" Ray exclaimed, stunned.
"I don't think Brooklyn even knew about the convention," Peter replied, baffled at my decision.
"No, she didn't. I...we... forgot to tell her about it until the night before, but the damage had already been done," I answered coldly, focusing on the paper with the notes, and not my colleagues' confused faces.
" My life became unhinged with my attention to her the previous weeks. A prime example is my unpreparedness at the convention is an idyllic example," I explained, nonplussed.
" It's not J's fault you were unprepared," Ray insisted incredulously.
"No, but she distracts me too much, and I am done with her socially. It was extremely humbling this week," I divulged, feeling my rage only gaining momentum. I felt my whole body tense up, and my hands clenched into fists angrily.
"Wait, it took like six or seven months for you two to finally admit your feelings for each other and start to date. Now you are throwing it away because you appeared foolish at one conference," Peter cried out, turning a bright shade of red, " Iggy, that is idiotic."
Since they were relentless, I stomped out of the lab, descended the stairs and grabbed a jacket before going outside for a walk. I needed to regain my composure as I was about to lose it. My career was too important to ruin because I had intense emotions for Janine. Inhaling deeply, I allowed the crisp air to enter my lungs as I strode a few blocks deep in thought. The temperature was around 58 degrees today,
Hadn't I had warned Janine that she was a gray area before the conference and that I hated uncertainty? Was her love more important to me than my career? What was the point of amor anyway? It couldn't pay bills, buy you things, assist in winning awards or help you become more competent. All it did was waste my time on things that didn't matter in the long run, and my career and my pursuit of a Nobel was more significant than anything else in my life.
"Janine has to go," I mumbled.
"I alone am in control of myself and everything I alone choose to think, feel, say, and do. I always do what is truly best for me, in every area of my own life." I repeated to myself repetitively about ten times each. My obsessive-compulsive tendencies started to show as I struggled to maintain control of myself.
After fortifying my brain with my affirmations to assist me in overcoming my feelings for Janine, I returned to the Firehouse with a subway sandwich to eat for dinner. No one bothered me for a few hours until Peter brought her up again three hours later while I worked on my monthly analysis report that explained the cases we had solved. I had hoped the conversation would have been let go by now, but my friends had other plans.
"Ok, I have to ask, Spengs, your behavior diverged from your usual routine around June when Brooklyn collapsed because she neglected to eat lunch. That was probably when it was the clearest to us that you took notice of her and began to care for her," Peter elucidated, joining me at the lab table.
Behind him, Ray stood and stated,
"You have been more pleasant, a little looser about your control issues and generally, more human-like."
"Yes and...," I snapped, losing my patience very rapidly.
" Now, you are back to being unhappy and uptight, but in dominance over yourself," Venkman finally spit out after a lengthy pause in the discussion.
"Peter, that's an overstatement, and you know it," I hotly demanded, raising my right eyebrow.
Exhausted, I was tired of the topic. It wasn't just the topic that consumed me, but also my attempts to tame my thoughts and emotions about Janine had been grueling the past several days.
" I don't want to talk about this anymore. It's over," I sharply declared, looking at them.
Both of my colleagues nodded their respective heads eventually, and they left me to my own devices.
