Elizabeth pulled her pelisse more securely around her to guard against the brisk morning air that nipped at her skin. It had been a remarkably mild winter so far, but it was still January. The sun shone brightly on the ground, which was blanketed in a layer of frost, making it glisten like a sheet of diamonds. If she did not have so much to think about, Elizabeth might have postponed her walk until later in the morning when it was warmer, but then Kitty might wish to accompany her. She needed to be alone.
As she reached the top of Oakham Mount, the sound of the wind whistling through the leafless trees filled her ears. Off in the distance, she could see a carriage headed toward Meryton at some speed. She wondered if it was just someone passing through, or if someone she knew was headed for town at such an early hour.
She pulled an apple out of her pocket and bit into it. If she had been at home, her parents would insist that she cut the fruit into slices before eating it, as that was considered much more lady-like. Elizabeth had always thought it rather too much effort to get a knife and cutting block to cut up the apple, or ask a servant to do so.
"Good morning, Miss Bennet," came a man's voice from behind her. Her heart jumped into her throat as she spun around. Mr. Darcy stood behind her, wearing a thick wool great coat and a scarf wound around his neck to ward off the chill. Winter attire became him. He looked even more tall and dignified.
"Good morning, Mr. Darcy," she replied, still slightly breathless. She slowly bent down to the ground where her apple had dropped from her hands in surprise. She wrapped it in her handkerchief and placed it in her pocket.
"I did not mean to frighten you."
"I was not attending to my surroundings. It was entirely my fault."
"The view is wonderful," said Mr. Darcy. "I prefer my home county, of course, but Hertfordshire is charming in its own way."
Elizabeth glanced over at Mr. Darcy, wondering what was behind his amiability. She had been unable to forget his comment from the previous evening, that the spreading of the story of his sister's elopement had not been her fault. His mind must have run along the same path, for he brought up the subject first by saying, "I suppose you are wondering about my sister's marriage."
"Indeed. Particularly as you said it was not my fault." Elizabeth slowly turned to face him, taking in his regretful expression.
"It is not your fault, because it is mine," he began.
Elizabeth was taken aback. She had expected him to say that a servant had spread the story or that Miss Darcy had confided in one of her friends.
"How is it your fault?" she asked.
"Will you not walk with me? It's too cold to linger in one place for long." Darcy gestured to the place. "If you wish to break your fast at Netherfield, I am sure Mr. and Mrs. Bingley would not object."
"I suppose," said Elizabeth slowly. "But we must send word back to Longbourn, so my family is not worried."
"Certainly. We will do so immediately upon our arrival." Mr. Darcy offered Elizabeth his arm, and they walked together along the path.
"You must now explain what you meant; how is it your fault?" asked Elizabeth.
"To begin with, I never explicitly told you that you must keep the matter secret, nor did I tell you the lady was my sister," he began. "I have run our conversation through my mind many times. I believe that if I had simply told you the entire story, that you would never have shared it."
"You are all graciousness, Mr. Darcy," she said, "but you cannot dismiss my part so easily. That it ought to be kept quiet was implied. I am not simple enough to need to have such spelled out so."
"No, perhaps not, but if you knew everything, I think you may have acted differently, or if I had asked for you to not speak of it."
"Perhaps."
"I also have held Mr. Wickham's debts for some time. Some I have held for years, but I never called them in, as I believed my father would not have wished to see his godson in debtor's prison. I did not even call them in after he harmed my sister, which I ought to have done. Then he could not have harmed anyone. He only dared act as he did, I suppose, because he did not believe I would call them in now. I never had in the past."
"My telling my mother and her warning others of his character was still the impetuous. He would not have been moved to tell if it were not for me."
"You were correct in what you said at the ball. Your family acted as you needed to, in order to protect your people. My sister lectured me at some length about that. She does not wish for Mr. Wickham to be given leave to harm others, just for the sake of her reputation. She said that she must pay for her actions, and that I must not allow such to happen to others. She was mad that I had not warned the locals myself, actually."
Elizabeth could not think of what to say. She had thought that Mr. Darcy would blame her and lecture her, but he was not. He was all kindness and forgiveness. When she found her voice again, she could only answer, "I cannot imagine Mrs. Bingley lecturing anyone."
"I fear I made her quite angry," said Mr. Darcy ruefully. "I had told her that I blamed your family, and she grew quite furious with me. She asked if I had been placed in your position, if I would have kept silent. When I mentioned your sister, and that she was nearly the same age as her, she said she was quite certain that I would have acted the same, and therefore I had to return to Hertfordshire and apologise to you. She has never become so angry before, not that I have ever seen."
"I cannot picture that at all, but I do believe you. Mary — Mrs. Hadley — has only yelled once in her life, that I know of. It was terrifying," Elizabeth said with a laugh before sobering. "Even so, the part I have played in this has tormented me. I wish there was a solution to your sister's troubles that did not involve her having to marry."
"I would not have cast her out if she did not wish to marry. I explained to her what would occur, that she would likely be shunned from most society and that there was a chance that she would not be able to marry if she did not now. Or if she did, that the gentleman would be marrying her for her fortune. As she has always wanted children when she grew up, she wished to marry."
"Still, she is so young!" said Elizabeth.
Darcy sighed. "It is not what I would have chosen, for certain. I do have Bingley's word as a gentleman that their marriage shall not be…official until she is a little older."
Elizabeth blushed at the implication of his words, for she was not meant to know of such things, but her mother had told them. She had not wished them to be unprotected and thought the best way to protect them was to tell them exactly what happened between a man and woman, that it produced children, and where to strike if a man tried to force his attentions on them. It was of some benefit to have an unconventional stepmother.
"That is…generous of him," she replied. It was very generous. She could not imagine most men would be willing to enter into such an arrangement. It made her wonder why Mr. Bingley would agree, but that was none of her business.
"Yes. I was rather surprised as well," said Mr. Darcy. "He was the one who offered it. I had thought of his marrying her, perhaps in several years, as he is a good man, but I had never mentioned it to him or to her. I rather thought that, well…," Darcy let his words trail off.
Elizabeth did not know what he had been going to say, but they were nearing Netherfield, so it was best that they did not discuss the matter further. A servant caught sight of them as they approached and ran off into the house, no doubt to ensure another place was set at the table.
"Can we stop at the stables for a moment?" asked Elizabeth.
Darcy looked confused but he agreed.
The Netherfield stables were much larger than Longbourn's and they were very populated. Nearly a dozen horses were within, and the smell of sweat and hay was overpowering. A stable hand approached them as they entered.
"I can fetch a groom, sir and miss, if you wish to ride," he said.
"No, that is not necessary," Elizabeth replied.
She approached a bay mare with star on its head. The horse was older, used mostly for guests who might not have enough riding experience to handle a more spirited animal.
"Why, good morning, pretty girl," said Elizabeth as the horse nudged at her. She ran a gentle hand over the horse's velvety nose. The mare's muzzle brushed against her pocket, almost as if the mare sensed the presence of the apple inside. "Oh, you think that is for you, do you? Very well."
Elizabeth took the apple from her pocket and held it out to the mare, who then retreated into the stall. "Oh, so you have what you wished, and now you shall ignore me? Next time I shall give my apples elsewhere."
Mr. Darcy's lips twitched as he held back laughter at her fake indignation, and his eyes sparkled when she faced him.
"Do I amuse you, sir?" she asked.
"Very much," he answered.
"Very well. I am glad to enliven your morning. Now, I am hungry, since I had to feed the horse my breakfast. Shall we go inside and see what Mrs. Runkel has made for breakfast?" she asked as she took the arm that he offered.
"You know Netherfield's cook's name?" he asked in surprise.
"Yes," she replied. "I have known her since I was a child. She was a cook at another nearby estate, until the new owner decided that they wished for a French cook instead. I was glad to see Mr. Bingley kept her on."
They discussed Mrs. Runkel's many merits as they entered the house, for she was an excellent cook. Mrs. Bingley was in the breakfast room when they arrived, and was delighted to have Miss Bennet as a guest for breakfast. Mr. Bingley arrived shortly after. He had not been informed of Miss Bennet's arrival, but welcomed her with warmth. There was a small awkwardness that passed between them, but it was quickly resolved when servants appeared bearing fresh tea and coffee and they were able to busy themselves with the food and drink.
Mr. Bingley commented that it was to be a fine day, despite the cold, and the others agreed. Other such inane talk filled the time at the table. Elizabeth meant to leave soon after breakfast, but Mrs. Bingley requested that she might stay for the morning.
"I would so like the company," said Mrs. Bingley. "Since I married, my companion went back to her home in Sussex. I am the only lady in the house, besides the servants."
Elizabeth agreed, taking pity on the poor girl. After all, it was her fault that the young lady was without her companion.
