We had just set foot in Alcanretia when we were surrounded by the mob that wanted to sell us something weird or wanted us to join their cult.

After trying to get out of there but not making any progress, I decided that desperate times called for desperate measures.

"Sorry, but we're fine. Not only do we have an Axis priest with us, I'm also an adamant follower of Lady Aqua and her teachings. I present her with offerings each day," I told them.

Hearing which, my party looked at me with deadpan expressions and Aqua tilted her head as she blinked repeatedly, as if to say 'when did that happen?'

"Huh, you do? What kind of offerings do you present Lady Aqua with?" a lady asked with wonder.

Not expecting that question, I just blurted out 'booze' before I could stop myself.

While I was panicking due to my answer, the lady who had asked me just smiled and said, "Ah, of course. Chapter 12 verse 13: A bottle of wine a day keeps the demons, heretics and Eris cultists away. Well farewell then fellow faithful. May you have a blessed day!" the lady said with enthusiasm.

Hearing which, I just looked at Aqua who was nervously scratching the back of her head.

"Well?" I asked her.

"I think… I might have been a little drunk while writing that."


After we were able to move past the mob, we booked a room in an inn, and before I could slip out into the city, Megumin grabbed me by the arm and dragged me with her.

It's not like I didn't want to go with her.

It would be like a date that's not a date, but I wanted to go alone so I could buy something for white day.

Seeing that my search had come out empty-handed till now, I thought that maybe I should look in this city full of weirdos to buy something for my weirdo.

Megumin had acted like she normally did since she gave me chocolates, which might have been my mistake 'cause I may have worded the whole thing out as a custom.

She wanted to do things the way my old world did and thought she wasn't supposed to say anything until I had given her a gift…

My habit of trying to make things a little more grandiose might be biting me in the ass.

We kept walking around the city, looking at the various beautiful sculptures that definitely didn't look like Aqua at all. Water fountains were on each street, around which the children were playing without a care in the world, with birds chirping from birdbaths and rooftops.

I had to agree that this city was breathtakingly beautiful.

And somehow with the Crimson Demon next to me, with her dainty hand in mine, her eyes shining with wonder, the whole thing was even better.


We stopped by a shop during our walk.

There was a man in his forties selling a few dolls the size of my palm.

I looked at the dolls a little more closely and I realized that the hagoromo, blue hair and blue eyes looked familiar.

Oh, it's Aqua!

Seeing me eyeing the dolls so intently, the shopkeeper said, "Ah, I see that you are entranced by Lady Aqua's beauty. Would you perhaps want to buy it?"

I wouldn't word it like that mister, but maybe I can buy it for Aqua. She might be a headache but she sometimes comes in handy during dire times. Maybe I can buy her a small gift to show appreciation.

She was constantly complaining that I don't appreciate her enough.

I picked one of the dolls up and saw a string coming out from its back, so I pulled on it.

"Eris pads her chest. Eris pads her chest" could be heard from the doll.

"Ah, you must be wondering where I got that from. It's a chant the new priest has been teaching."

I had a feeling that I knew who this new priest was…

Well, I guess I'll buy it for her anyway.

I asked the shopkeeper to pack one.

I was about to pay him the money when he handed me a paper saying I needed to sign it before the payment.

I looked at the paper and it was… the Axis cult registration form.

Seeing the form in my hand and the uneasy look I wore, Megumin decided to step in and got me out of there without me becoming a member of the cult.

We continued on our trip, and were stopped by an old lady who was shouting some interesting things.

"I have a cure for every disease, be it caused by evil spirits or staying too long with Eris cultists, this water blessed by our goddess Aqua herself cures it all! Come buy! Come, come!"

We were about to walk past her when she pointed at me and said.

"You, young man, I believe you need this most. I see many bad spirits looming around you. Yes, yes. You are plagued by the presence of demons."

Well, I am friends with a lich and the literal Duke of Hell, so she wasn't wrong…

While I was wondering how her rambling was somehow true, Jarippa was chasing his tail in the background with Chomusuke looking on with a deadpan expression.

"Sorry, but I don't need your help. I'm quite all right. And how are you so sure that you have a cure to every disease?"

"Well you see, legend has it that the goddess Aqua herself descended here some 1,000 years ago and bathed in the pools of water that my family has owned for ages."

Her family had been selling Aqua's bathwater… literal bathwater…

I think I've heard enough.

When I tried to move past her, she exclaimed, "Are you sure that you and your companions aren't being plagued by evil spirits?!"

"Don't worry, there's nothing wrong with me or my companions…" I said as I looked back toward Jarippa who was lying on his back as he nomed on his tail. Megumin was threatening to explode some girl who had a familiar paper in hand while Chomusuke was sitting in the middle of the chaos, wishing she were anywhere but here.

"I don't know these people."


After dragging Megumin away from the poor girl, we decided to have lunch.

After the days events, I had started to feel a little hungry and it was around the time I usually had my lunch.

It didn't take us long to find a place to eat.

We were sitting in an open-air cafe.

I had ordered the special meat the waitress was gushing about while Megumin had just ordered some cabbages and toad meat even after I said I was buying.

The meals came not long after. Mine looked to be a mix of gravy and some kind of soup but I didn't question it seeing that the person opposite to me was eating toads.

I picked up a spoonful of my meal, and after tasting it I found it to be a little salty but still good.

"Do you like it sir?" the waitress asked as she came back.

"Yeah it's nice, but it's a little salty."

"Ah, that's due to the special ingredient."

"What ingredient?" I asked as I brought another spoonful of it to my mouth.

"This special dish is made with mushrooms found only in the local mountains, herbs from a secret place and tears of Eris church members."

The noise of a spoon dropping into the bowl resonated around us as I just stared at the waitress.

The people of this city aren't weird, they're bat shit insane!

I didn't want to make a scene so I just flashed the waitress a fake smile and sneakily smuggled the meal to Chomusuke and Jarippa once she left.

"Ah, a meal full of human sorrow. It's been a while since I had one."

I then tried to get a cabbage stick from Megumin's plate but she just swatted my arm away.

"You wanted to eat a special meat right? Then go eat it, these are mine," she said as she dragged her plate away from me.


I ended up ordering another meal afterward, this one being a normal one without human tears… hopefully.

We left the cafe and were going towards the hotel.

As we were on our way, a young girl ran towards us in a hurry.

She looked to be about ten years old.

She fell in front of us.

Megumin and I rushed to her in a hurry. She struggled and said while resisting the pain, "Ah… Thank you, big brother," she said as she smiled weakly.

What a pure smile, so uncorrupted.

"Are you okay? You should be more careful. Can you stand? Does it hurt?
Megumin said softly to the girl with a gentle expression.

Seeing Megumin chatting with the girl like that was honestly a nice experience.

The girl had a little scratch on her leg which Megumin wrapped up in some cloth she had in her pouch.

Of course my traitorous mind had to butt in with the thought of how Megumin was so good with kids…

Which of course sent me to imagination land, from which I only came back from when Chomusuke scratched me in the leg.

"You haven't even started dating yet you idiot, so come back."

I went to the girl and offered her a hand.

The girl grabbed my hand happily.

"Does it hurt to stand?" I asked.

"A little, but I'm alright now big brother. Big sister made everything better. You have a kind sister big brother," the girl said before walking away.

I smiled at her as she walked away.

… Wait, did she say sister?


We reached our hotel after a while.

We were about to enter when Megumin turned to me and said, "I need to go take a bath, so I'll see you later," before she walked away with Chomusuke in her hands.

"No, no, anywhere but there. Kazuma help me…"

Seeing the cat wriggling in her hands, I let out a snort and went inside the inn.

I had just stepped in when I thought of something.

Was that an invite?!

'I'll see you later'... did she mean in the mixed bath…?

Nah, she probably wouldn't do that, and even if she did, I can't just walk in there.

"But isn't that what we came here for in the first place?" a small demonic voice said from my shoulder.

A chibi version of myself with horns on his head was sitting there, looking at me with his red eyes.

"Don't you want to see what's under that robe? You've already tried and she was inviting you."

"Don't listen to his rubbish Kazuma, you're doing the right thing. It must be a test from her to see your character," an angelic voice said from my other shoulder.

Another chibi version of me with a halo and white wings was floating there.

Well, the angelic me was probably right and this whole thing did feel like a test.

"You always pussy out, that's why Sakura left you," demon me said with a sneer.

"Low blow dude, low blow," the angelic me said as I curled up into a ball.

After hearing that, I had decided on my decision, something I should've done from the get go.

I dashed into my room and grabbed my towel.

"Wait stop, stop! Don't do this Kazuma!" the angel me kept shouting as it grabbed me from the back of my shirt.

But I just swatted it away like a fly.

I entered that bath area and there were three entrances before me.

From left to right were the men, mixed and female hot springs.

I chose the middle entrance without any hesitation.

Of course I did.

On my journey to see the forbidden, I didn't feel shy and just headed right in…

When I entered, I could hear some noises from inside, which meant there was someone in here.

And I knew who it was…

Calm down, I need to calm down. I'm just about to see the girl I like naked for the first time.

No big deal…

I forced myself to cool down, took off my clothes and, with my heart thumping in my chest, I entered the mixed bath.

… At this moment, I heard someone talking from the bath.

"That damn cult's finally going to be destroyed. The work in destroying the secret hot spring is now complete, the progress in the other hot springs are also proceeding smoothly. Now we just need to wait. For us who have long lifetimes, waiting a decade of two's no big deal."

Umm… Megumin, do you have a cough or cold?

I don't remember you sounding more manly than me…

"You have the worst luck bud," the devil me said as he blinked out in a puff of smoke.

From what I heard, I could conclude that something or someone was planning to destroy the Axis cult.

… I'll make it clear. I don't want to be involved in any troublesome matters.

And after today, I may just lend them a hand…

Wouldn't it be better if the Axis cult was destroyed?

Fortunately, although I wasn't using skills to hide myself, they didn't notice my presence.

I'll just pretend that I never heard about this and try to get away before I get dragged in.

I put on the clothes I took off…