A Gift Fic presented to vapourtrails for their work in Round Two of the Houses Competition!
Prompt: Wolfstar, I'm so tired - Lauv, Troye Sivan
0-0-0-0
Sirius Black was tired of love songs. It was hard not to be, because they were everywhere. Telling their own stories of success, trying to explain how love worked, how things should be. But Sirius knew that they were wrong, and that love was not the same as in the love songs. Not for him, anyway.
Love songs didn't talk about the complications that existed in real love. Because there aren't just two options: they love you, or they don't. There's everything else in between. For example, if someone loves you, but doesn't want to accept that you could be good together. If they think that they wouldn't work in a relationship. If they think that they are unloveable, which is the opposite of what you think. The opposite of what Sirius thought about Remus Lupin. Remus just couldn't see it yet.
Some days Sirius was even tired of the love itself. It was frustrating to feel something so strongly and yet not be able to articulate in a way that the other person can comprehend it. It was an impossible task and some days it was increasingly difficult to be as patient as he wanted to be.
So he partied. He went out, he tried drinking and dancing away the fears again. He kissed girls, knowing that he didn't feel anything. He couldn't. Not for anyone except for Remus. At the end of the night, when all was said and done, he was left staring through the window, wondering whether Remus was doing the same; wondering whether Remus was thinking about him too.
If he did, he didn't say anything.
Sirius would wait. He could hold out for the perfect love a little longer.
0-0-0-0
Thanks for reading!
