Severus sulked as he was hustled to bed in his own room with stern instructions to stay put. He didn't want to stay put. He wanted to demand his children be allowed to stay with him, the fear that he couldn't get to them when it mattered still lingered, causing slight spikes in his heart rate every time the memory flashed through his head. He wanted to demand answers. He wanted…his bed not to be quite this comfortable because really he was rather tired. And his head was starting to hurt again and…Amelia was murmuring soothing nonsense. Well…the tone was soothing even if he was almost positive it was mainly a rant about staying out of trouble and him being a bloody idiot who should know better than to adopt a dog with human-like intelligence without checking for animagi…and while he wasn't fond of the words, the stroking of his head was nice. No one stroked his head like he was a child. Not even when he was a child. And he shouldn't be enjoying it, not really, but he really was so very tired and emotionally wrung out and…sore. His head bloody hurt damn it, so did his arse but he wasn't going to mention that. Someone would make a joke and it wouldn't be funny. His last thought as sleep dragged him under was a fleeting thought that he missed the reassuring bulk of the bloody dog. Shame he was a human really.
"How are you feeling?" Amelia's concerned face peered down at him, startling him as he woke.
"Salazar's sack woman!" he barked, trying to get his heart rate back under control. "I was fine until I thought someone had come to murder me in my bed."
Amelia snorted, "As if I'd let you catch me."
He glowered at her, there was nothing he could say to that. She was deceptively sneaky when she wanted to be but there was no way he was giving her the satisfaction of admitting that. He'd never live it down. She'd probably ensure she was as overtly terrifying as possible just to see him flinch, and she'd rope in Narcissa…and Jean. Merlin help him she'd rope in Jean and then he'd never fucking sleep again.
"Where are my children?" he asked instead, trying to banish the image of Jean sneaking into his rooms. She'd use something obscure, wouldn't she? An injectable perhaps ... .or that knife she was so fond of waving when she was making a point. Although that would be messy and she wasn't fond of mess. So… definitely injectables then. She presumably had access to an alarming amount of muggle drugs. Fuck. Why the fuck had he never considered that? And wizards were fucking stupid. Most of them didn't know what a fucking needle was so they wouldn't check for an injection site...or the muggle drugs and she'd get away with it and….Attempting to control his own rising heart rate, he reminded himself forcefully that he wasn't the one Jean was likely to murder. Currently anyway. Lecture. Absolutely…well, she'd already promised he was getting one of those, hadn't she? But it was Black she was keeping an eye on this time. And if he found himself on the end of her needle it was hardly a loss, now was it?
Amelia was looking at him with a confusing mix of amusement and concern. "I can't decide whether the place you just went to was pleasant or not."
Damn. He used to be better at hiding his expression than this. He really was losing his touch. "I was merely contemplating what weapons Jean would utilise should she be severely displeased," he informed her primly, making her choke on a laugh.
"Oh Merlin. It'd be something sharp and pointy knowing Jean. She seems fond of reminding us she owns such things."
"Yes well…let's try and not incur her wrath." he muttered, "Now the children?"
"Are in their dorms," she replied pointedly, "It's Monday. They have classes. You have classes."
"Surely I should be allowed a day off," he muttered peevishly, "My dog turned into a man and my coffee table attacked me."
"Sorry love, not going to happen," Amelia informed him cheerfully, "Perhaps if you'd let Poppy keep you overnight you might have managed to convince them but you insisted you were fine so up you get, it's time for school."
"Remind me why I like you?" he muttered.
"That thing with my tongue, remember?" she teased, bouncing out of bed with entirely too much energy for his liking. "If you move now, I might be persuaded to go visit Doris," she called, heading for his bathroom.
Well, that changed things. Doris' coffee was absolutely worth getting out of bed for. Which reminded him, he really did need to get the name of her supplier. He needed it. Daily. And he couldn't be arsed flooing and apparating all over the country on a daily basis. He didn't have time for that. Maybe….maybe he could convince Black to do it. As an apology. That could work, couldn't it? Coffee on tap…but then he'd need to see him daily and that sounded less fun. Damn it. He did not want to see him daily. He didn't want to fucking see him at all quite frankly. He wondered briefly if Narcissa had murdered him yet. That was a happy thought he mused as he climbed out of bed. Narcissa could be wonderfully creative. If he was lucky Black wouldn't last the week. And maybe, if he was very, very good, she'd let him watch.
He made it to his classes, his coffee high remaining until the third one of the day. The one with his children. His exceptionally unsubtle children. He'd have to train them better, they were ridiculous, watching him like he was about to die at any moment. It was rather disconcerting, leaving him fighting the urge to check that he was actually in one piece and not attempting to teach the little idiots potions with a limb hanging off. Merlin knew Albus would probably expect him to.
Still, he felt fine, even if his arse still hurt. He was sure there would be a bruise. His head was fine though so that was something and so far, no one seemed keen to blow them up and goddamn it, he was taking that as a win. One of the little sods was always trying to blow them up. He wondered briefly if Hermione had threatened them all, he wouldn't bloody put it past her, terrifying little harridan that she was. Still, he was bloody grateful when the class was over, he really didn't like being so closely scrutinised.
"Father?" Damn it, she looked unsure and worried. And now he felt guilty for wanting to hurry the class along so they'd stop staring at him.
"Yes, my girl?"
"Are you alright?"
"I'm fine," he soothed, wrapping her in a hug as her classmates filed out, not willing to admit, even to himself that he felt marginally better for it. She was a terrible influence, this girl of his, making him crave hugs and human contact. Didn't she know he was meant to be an unsociable loner? Not that he'd been alone in months, now he thought about it. He seemed to have acquired an alarming amount of people who invaded his life on a regular basis.
"Promise?" she murmured, squeezing him back, derailing his wandering thoughts.
"Promise," he agreed, eyeing Harry over her head.
"You'd tell us if you weren't right?" he checked, meeting his eyes. "Just…you were only in the hospital wing yesterday...and your head..."
"Yes." He cut him off before he could get into his stride. He didn't need two of them for fucks sake! One was enough. "Poppy knows what she's doing. I am fine. Now, don't you two have somewhere to be?" Neither of them moved, "You can come back and mother me tonight but for the love of Merlin, shoo! I have fifth years to terrorise!"
"Fine," they sighed in unison, neither of them looking particularly happy about it as they left for their next class.
He sighed dramatically, already envisioning the coddling that was to come, trying not to give in to the anxiety that was creeping up now they were out of his sight.
It was almost amusing to see them sitting seriously on his sofa after dinner, like parents about to interrogate him. Or it would be if he wasn't so bloody tired. The day had seemed never-ending, apparently, Hermione's threats hadn't reached the entire school and several of the little sods had attempted to create new potions with weird and wonderful properties. One of his second years had concocted something that had given the boy pixie ears, it shouldn't have been possible and yet….he gave an internal sigh. It was Poppy's problem now. Bracing himself he turned to face his children.
"Go on then," he sighed, "Commence your fussing."
They moved immediately, tugging him down between them and curling into his side. "How are you feeling?"
"Tired," he admitted with a sigh, wrapping his arm around them both.
"So tired we should go?" Hermione checked, already moving.
"No!" he pulled her back in, his own worry from the previous day hitting him with full force now he wasn't having to pretend to function. He imagined it would take far more time than they'd like for him to get over the image of his children on the opposite side from him, a suspected madman between them. He'd likely drive them insane ensuring it never happened again. His blood pressure couldn't take it again though so they'd just need to learn to cope.
"What's going to happen now?" Harry asked softly after several beats of silence.
"With?" he frowned.
"Well…technically I'm supposed to be Sirius Black's problem."
Severus' frown deepened, not entirely sure where the boy was going with this. "Do you want to be?"
Harry stiffened, "I…we sort of…forced you into the adoption and I…"
"Stop! For the love of magic stop!" he turned to Hermione, "This is on you, my girl. I never noticed your brother rambling before. Now he sounds exactly like you." Hermione scowled, but Harry smiled slightly, still so easily pleased with any tangible link to family. "As for you, my boy, you didn't force me into anything. Now cease being an idiot. I've had to deal with them all day and my patience is severely lacking."
"You had patience at the start of the day…. Father?"
Severus froze, his eyes blowing wide as he looked down at his nervous-looking son. "No," he croaked, the word hitting him like a physical blow. He should know what to do with this now surely? He remembered this feeling from Hermione. But fuck it all the room was dusty again. He wasn't fucking crying. He bloody wasn't! There was just excessive dust! He felt arms tighten around him, almost suffocating him in their restrictiveness. He'd complain but he was almost certain that was the only thing holding him together, he felt completely shattered. One word. Just a simple little word and he felt like the world was tilting on its axis. Again. It's not a feeling he likes, this unnamed feeling that's so overwhelming it almost hurts. And goddamn it, he was going to have to make sure he dusted more regularly, his eyes refused to stop streaming, this was ridiculous!
"Is everything alright?" a soft voice asked, startling them out of the bubble they'd created. He felt the children stiffen slightly before relaxing, clearly recognising the person attached to the voice.
"It's just dusty," Harry murmured, before shooting Severus a slightly impish grin, "isn't it, Father?" None of them missed Amelia's sharp intake of breath, ignoring it, Harry continued, "None of us are crying. It's just the dust."
"Brat," he muttered, trying to force himself back under control, wondering what the actual fuck he was meant to do with all these new…feelings, he kept having. He was meant to be the bastard bat of the dungeons for fucks sake! And now he had feelings and received hugs and…goddamn it was this really his life?
"Dungeons tend to be." Amelia agreed, sounding slightly wobbly. "I just came to check on you. I should have known I wouldn't need to. Please tell me you've lectured him properly for not checking for animagi?"
As one, Harry and Hermione let him go and looked up. Fuck. "Not yet," Hermione replied slowly, crossing her arms over her chest as she stood, taking a step backwards.
"But now you mention it, we should," Harry agreed, copying his sister before pinning him with a glare that rivalled his own, despite the faint twitch of his lips that might have been amusement. Fuck. For fucks sake! How the fuck had the boy learned his facial expressions? That wasn't fair! Hermione doing it was enough! He didn't need two children who glared at him into submission!
"Oh, we definitely should," Hermione muttered threateningly, before raising her voice, "How could you forget to check?"
"I…I…" he stammered, for fucks sake! Was he bloody twelve again? They were children! His children! He was the bloody adult here! "I don't know."
"You don't know," Hermione sneered in perfect mimicry of his own tone making Amelia choke as she bit back a laugh. "What if Sirius had been exactly what we all believed he was?"
He felt his heart clench at that question. What indeed? Gods if he'd truly been after Harry and he hadn't checked. They must have read something on his face because their expressions softened, dropping all pretence. "Oh Father," Hermione sighed. "I want to say it's nice to know you make mistakes like the rest of us but honestly! How on earth did you forget!"
Severus held up his hands in supplication, "Truly," he sighed, "I don't know."
She rolled her eyes at him. "We're making Amelia check any other pets we end up with."
His jaw dropped, "I won't make the same mistake again!" he protested.
They laughed. He wasn't sure why, he wasn't fucking joking. He'd never forget again. "Probably not," Hermione agreed, "But just in case, Amelia's checking."
"Now how are you really?" Amelia checked, taking advantage of his silence, pulling him back down onto the sofa as the children curled up on the one opposite.
"Tired." he muttered petulantly, "Annoyed."
She snorted, "You've only yourself to blame Severus." she replied tartly. "I think all that whiskey addled your brain. Maybe we need Min to cut you off."
"What?" he gasped, twisting to look at her in horror. Wincing when his back cracked. Fuck he really was getting old. "No! You wouldn't!"
"I might," she retorted. "And we both know she'd go along with it just to torture you."
"Of course, she bloody would," he muttered, "Sodding harpy."
"I do hope you aren't talking about me," a tart voice came from the doorway.
"For fucks sake." Severus groaned, "Does no one wait on an invite anymore?"
"If we were waiting on an invitation, Severus Snape, I'd have all my whiskey drank myself," Minerva replied, sitting down beside Harry. "Now how are you? Saul came to see me earlier, Peter is going to be processed and sent to trial in a fortnight. They'll want to speak to the children."
"What? No!"
"Severus is not optional. They heard everything, they were the ones who pushed for him to be investigated after Sirius was ignored. They are going to have to be there."
"Fine." he muttered, "But I'm going with them"
"Of course you are." Minerva nodded, "I'll clear it with Albus. Now. I imagine we need to discuss controlling the narrative of Mr Potter's adoption. I had wondered if you'd consent to an interview."
He recoiled on instinct. "Why?"
"So we head off any rumours," she replied, looking at him as if he were an idiot. "We can have statements from Ms MacKillop, Saul, hell even Alastor Moody, alongside an interview with you and the children."
"But I don't want to." he protested.
"Tough," she shot back, looking at Amelia. "I had considered Xenophilius Lovegood. An unorthodox choice perhaps but Merlin knows we can't trust Rita."
"Xeno?" Amelia's nose scrunched, "Are you sure?"
"Not in the slightest, Do you have any other recommendations?"
"I ah….Priscilla Selwyn has always been fair when I've dealt with her. Still The Prophet unfortunately but I worry if we went anywhere else it would come back to bite us."
"Unfortunately you're probably right," Minerva sighed in frustration, "Can you contact her?"
"Yes."
"I am here!" Severus hissed.
"We know." Minerva retorted, "But you're currently being unreasonable so we're ignoring you."
Harry and Hermione both let out a slightly choked laugh, wisely stifling it at the look on his face. How fucking dare she! He wasn't a bloody child! He was a fully grown man and reporters were fucking invasive. He didn't want to speak to one. They'd pry. And he had enough of that with the children and the bloody mind healer. He didn't need someone else to talk to him. He wanted fucking peace! And even if she did have a point, wasn't it enough that he didn't fucking want to? But what if there was a way to contest the adoption? What if they made up so much stuff that Black reconsidered his stance, because let's fucking face it Rita wouldn't know a sodding fact if it bit her on the arse and forced her to dance the tango. What if they made up enough that the children reconsidered their stance? Fuck. He was going to have to fucking agree, wasn't he?
"I want to pre-approve the questions." he barked.
Minerva froze momentarily, pondering that. "Done." she nodded. "Well that was easier than I anticipated, shame you've been told to abstain for the next fortnight my boy, I'd have been tempted to share the good whiskey."
"I'm beginning to think someone up there fucking hates me," he muttered. He deserved the good whiskey, didn't he? But in a fortnight Minerva wasn't going to bloody remember that and he'd be stuck with the normal stuff. His normal stuff probably. Then again, she did hold down two full-time jobs and keep the Headmaster from completely destroying the school so perhaps she deserved to keep it.
Two days later, he was absolutely sure that someone up there hated him as Albus eyed him from across the desk wearing his best disappointed grandfather look, the newest edition of Potions Monthly in front of him. In a move that he hadn't expected, Remus had accompanied him after hearing his summons, guessing that the conversation was about Harry and asking to be kept in the loop.
"Now Remus my boy, surely you have other places to be?" Albus twinkled.
"Nope," Remus informed him cheerfully, wriggling a little to get comfortable. Severus almost laughed. Almost. There were apparently some upsides to this pet wolf thing, outing people masquerading as pets notwithstanding.
Albus looked momentarily nonplussed, "I really must insist…."
"Sorry Albus, Saul asked that we keep an eye on Severus, make sure there are no lingering effects, you understand," Remus replied blithely.
"But I can pass them on."
"Ah but truthfully, Saul's not overly happy with you at the moment and if I upset him he'll involve Jean. I do not want him to involve Jean."
"Jean…" Albus trailed off looking confused.
"Hermione's mother," Remus reminded him cheerfully, "Delightful woman, she's taken to owling me. Utterly fucking terrifying though."
"She's owling you?" Severs asked in confusion.
"Oh yes," he flushed slightly, "Apparently Hermione or Harry mentioned the whole Pack thing and she was intrigued. And now she writes for book recommendations and information."
Severus blinked trying to compute that. Jean wrote to his pet wolf. That was….unexpected. And highly dangerous now he thought about it. The woman was information gathering, which meant at some point he was going to trip up and she'd know! And he'd be summoned home again like an errant child or she'd embarrass him. Again. He'd had to burn his braces after the last time, he couldn't look at them without cringing! Oh god, she was going to have fun with this, wasn't she?
"You can't tell her anything!"
"Severus," Remus began slowly, "Have you ever tried to keep something from her?"
He whined. Not that he would admit it but for fucks sake! Did the world fucking hate him? "God damn it!" he cursed, "Surely you can…skirt around the truth? I don't need any more lectures!"
Remus snorted, "She did say to remind you to stock up on Milton." Severus felt his face heat, "She wouldn't tell me why though."
"It doesn't matter," he muttered, trying to force his face back under control. Fucking irritating woman. Perhaps he should have been more grateful in his younger years that he had no siblings. He'd never have survived a childhood with a sister like Jean. And it would have been his bloody luck to get one just like her.
Albus cleared his throat, "Surely one muggle woman is not that bad? She'll never know if you're not here."
Remus snorted, loudly. "Albus I say this with the utmost respect, but you have no idea what you're talking about. We're discussing the same woman who arranged for the head of the Department of Mysteries to escort her here. Remember her? I wouldn't risk my life."
Albus looked astonished. "Right, I ah…" he glanced back at the article, his eyes losing his twinkle. "What is this?"
"Potions Monthly," Severus replied promptly.
"Severus! Why is Miss Granger's name in it!"
"My daughter is credited with breaking down basilisk venom and identifying the component parts, which you'd know if you'd read it," he responded blandly, well used to this game Albus played.
"She is a thirteen year old witch! Basilisk venom is not on the third year curriculum."
"She is fourteen, and my daughter and there is nothing that states that she cannot have extracurricular activities."
"Extracurricular activities," Albus spluttered. "I am getting owls asking where you got basilisk venom! I am being asked why additional potions are not available to all, you are being accused of favouritism!"
"And if any of the little sods were competent I'd consider it, but they are not."
"Your daughter is the only one getting the opportunity!"
"Not quite," he corrected, "Harry is listed too."
Albus' face went through a series of colours as he flicked through the magazine, finding the article to check Severus' claims. "Why?" demanded.
"Because he helped." Severus shrugged.
"No! You will stop this at once!"
"Ah, I thought you might say that," Severus admitted, "But…I technically had nothing to do with it. That's all Saul, do feel free to take it up with him."
"What?" Albus looked momentarily blindsided, Severus took a moment to enjoy the expression before he smiled slightly smugly, knowing it would annoy him.
"The article is a result of a project he gave the children on behalf of the Department of Mysteries. I had nothing to do with it. Now, was that all?"
"No!" Albus howled. "Why am I hearing rumours of you adopting Harry Potter?"
Severus almost snorted. Rumours. The man had heard it directly from Minerva, all of them agreeing that letting him find out from The Prophet, while undoubtedly amusing, would not be the best move. "That would be because I did," he replied finally, his face carefully expressionless.
"You did," Albus repeated dumbly before he paled, "Why?"
"Because he asked me to." Severus' face went hard, "It's done. You cannot interfere, anyone who could has agreed to it."
"And what happens when he's back!" Albus howled.
"Then if I need to I will take my children as far away from this fight as I can possibly get."
"No!" Albus went white, "Harry needs…"
"A childhood!" Severus spat, "A normal fucking childhood without the expectations of the entirety of our world on his shoulders."
"But…but he can't!"
"Why?" Severus froze, he hadn't been the one to ask, beside him Remus was shaking with the force of his anger, his eyes flashing amber, "What aren't you saying?"
Albus looked momentarily like a deer caught in headlights before he plastered his understanding grandfather face back on, "Young Harry has a destiny to fulfil that is true. I believe he is the only one who can defeat Tom so you have to understand….as much as it pains me, he cannot run from this fight."
"Why?" Severus asked with a calm he did not feel, a horrible sense of foreboding sweeping through him.
"His scar is rather unique isn't it?" Albus mused, sending a jolt of fear through him.
"What do you know?" he growled.
"Nothing," Albus replied, "Suspect…"
"Out with it!" Remus snarled, startling them both. "Now!"
Beside Albus, Helga looked torn. "Helga will have to bes getting the governors," she warned.
"No no, I'll explain." Albus soothed. Helga did not look convinced.
"You are aware, of course, that young Mr Potter's Scar tends to hurt when Tom is near?"
"Yes," Severus bit out. "He mentioned it when we discussed his first year."
Albus hummed, "In light of our discoveries I am forced to conclude it is not a normal scar."
"Not a normal scar," Severus repeated, utterly confused. Why did the man never speak plainly? Why was it always riddles and half-thoughts? For fucks sake, he should have brought Min. She'd have been ranting by now and he might have hurried things along. Although the tiny elf glaring at him was amusing. He'd pay good money to see Albus being shouted at by the creature. He got the impression that only her rigid self-control was preventing it and that appeared to be hanging on by a thread. Merlin, he hoped the thread snapped.
"No," Albus agreed.
"What discoveries?" Remus demanded, his voice eerily controlled.
"Why the Horcruxes my dear boy," Albus informed him serenely. Severus watched with slightly detached fascination as Remus' face went through a series of expressions, none of them pleasant.
"Pardon?" he asked with deathly calm. "What Horcruxes?"
"The ones Tom made, of course. Didn't Severs tell you?"
"No." Remus bit out, "He did not." He paled suddenly as something seemed to occur to him. "No!"
"Is someone going to explain?" Severus demanded, he didn't like feeling like he was missing something and he was clearly fucking missing something.
"Horcruxes, Harry's scar…"Remus was mumbling.
Severus stiffened as understanding hit him, feeling like someone was sitting on his chest, making it increasingly difficult to breathe. Horcruxes. Harry's scar. Not a normal scar. Fuck. Fucking fuck no! Absolutely fucking not. Part of that fucker was not in his fucking son! It just fucking wasn't! He wasn't even aware he had stood up until he was standing at the bottom of the staircase, his feet moving automatically to his rooms. He didn't hear Remus calling him nor did he realise where he was going until the words of his destination were coming out of his mouth.
He moved on autopilot, not giving a fuck that he still had afternoon classes to teach.
"Professor Snape?" a confused voice called, he looked up unseeing.
"I need Saul. Now." He croaked.
The face looked concerned. He knew he knew it but he had no fucking idea who it was. A Horcrux. His son. It went round on a loop inside his head making him feel increasingly sick the more it sunk in. "Alright, Professor." the voice offered soothingly, "Just come with me."
He felt himself be gilded into a room and then into a seat. Before the voice called out for Saul. He vaguely recognised the man's reply. A Horcrux. His son. The fucker was in his son. Had always been in him. His son. A Horcrux.
"Severus?" He lifted his head to look at Saul's worried face. It paled dramatically when he did. "The children?" he checked frantically.
"A Horcrux." he croaked.
"Ok," Saul blew the word out on a breath. "You've found another?
"Harry," he whispered.
Saul froze, "Harry found one?"
"No." he rasped, utterly unable to make his words make sense. He saw the moment Saul put the clues together, far far quicker than he had.
"NO!" He snarled. "Absolutely fucking not." he turned to the Unspeakable next to him. "Edwards, get me the goblins and ask for their best healer and William Weasley," he barked, "Then bring the enhanced confidentiality contracts."
"Yes sir." she agreed, moving quickly.
"What makes you think Harrys is a Horcrux?" Saul demanded, clearly trying to remain somewhat calm.
"Albus," he admitted.
A deadly look crossed Saul's face, "If that arsewipe has withheld this," he hissed, "I will fucking end him."
"Suspected since we confirmed the existence of Horxcues," Severus continued as if he hadn't spoken. Horcrux. His son.
"Severus, drink this." Saul shoved a potion under his nose.
He felt the effects of the calming draught immediately, his brain seeming less foggy as he focused on the man in front of him. It couldn't numb the horror that was still coursing through him. Albus thought Harry was a fucking Horcrux. A part of Tom sodding Riddle resided in his son. He wanted to vomit.
"What are we going to do?" he asked instead, forcing it all behind his shields.
Looking momentarily lost, something that scared him far more than he wanted to admit, Saul shook his head. "I don't know," he admitted. "I'm hoping the goblins have some answers, to be honest otherwise…." Saul blew out a breath. "Well, otherwise my department has a new problem to solve. And they will bloody solve it because nothing else is acceptable. Do the children know?"
"No!" he gave a hollow laugh, "I only just found out. How the fuck am I meant to tell them that?"
"I don't know," Saul looked at him helplessly. "Can we…not until we have some answers?"
"If you ask to examine his scar he's going to know something is going on," Severus replied flatly. "And if he doesn't realise, Hermione bloody will so, no."
"Right then…let's speak to the goblins and hope they have some answers." Saul rocked on heels heels uncomfortably.
Severus nodded mechanically wishing more than anything that the calming draught had been scotch. The entire bottle, preferably.
