Chapter 71 – A Promise Still to Keep
The world around Yuna blurred together in a spiraling circle of whites and greys. Her head spun from the weightlessness of falling with no ground in sight. She wanted to scream but couldn't force out air from her throat. Her muscles clenched, anticipating a deadly impact at any moment. As suddenly as her endless fall began, her feet tapped down on a solid surface.
Tepid water splashed up onto her legs. She opened her eyes, greeted by a foreign yet familiar sight around her. Above her, a radiant curtain of light flickered and swayed across a dusky side. It created a kaleidoscope of green, blue, and purple. Peeking out from behind the colorful waves of light, a thousand tiny stars twinkled in the deep blue sky.
Her gaze drifted downward, tracking the flittering, stray pyreflies floating around her. Their luminous bodies shined like fireflies in the night sky. She further looked down at her feet, still sunken in a puddle on a small, rocky ledge. The water mixed with the dirt forming a sticky mud that clung to her boots. A verdant blanket of green moss and blooming wildflowers covered the ledge. A hint of lavender hung in the air.
Walking to the edge, she gasped at the tremendous fall awaiting her if she had but one misstep. Billowing ivory clouds hovered several hundred feet down, shrouding whatever might reside far below her.
Behind her, stony tendrils protruded down from the next ledge above her. Shaking off the murky water from her boots, she climbed up to the next ledge. It extended away from the abyss and into a long, winding path with alien flora surrounding it on either side. Towering lilies, their fiery petals glowing like colossal suns overhead, lined either side of the road. The nectar from the flowers sweetened the air. Yuna could taste it on the tip of her tongue.
Bewildered but not scared by her new surroundings, if only because of her past jaunts into the Farplane, she resolved herself to trudge down the path. Unlike other parts of the Farplane, she felt like a stranger in a strange land here. She saw no way to return to Spira or a method to communicate with her friends.
She let out a heavy sigh when the realization that she was alone again sunk in. The final images of her encounter with Lord Zaon flashback into her mind. Why did he whisk her away to the Farplane? Nothing existed in the world of the afterlife for her to regain. She bit her lip, dwelling on how worried Rikku and Paine must be. Not even sure if they would know where she went, Yuna continued walking.
The road twisted around like a rope recently untied. The further down she walked, the more the lush, fertile world blackened into a lifeless, rocky landscape. Rounding a bend, she noticed the large face of a man carved onto the side of the ledge. The expressionless eyes gazed into the dark distance. Following the face's line of sight, she witnessed the path ahead descend into a realm of shadows.
Almost all colors disappeared in the distance, replaced by contrasting hues of black and white. Dead trees, with bare branches pointing sharply out from the rotted trunks, sprouted up into the air like twisted ziggurats. Viscous black clouds masked the tranquil, dusky sky above.
Swallowing hard, Yuna wrapped her arms around herself. The path lying ahead terrified her. With no backup to call upon, she had nowhere else to go. She closed her eyes and breathed in deeply. Without reopening them, she stepped forward, refusing to allow fear to overcome her. Crossing into the desolate land, a chill immediately jumped across her skin. It tingled at first. As she walked under the disfigured shadows of the monstrous trees lining her way, the tingling moved from her skin to inside her.
Instead of cold, she felt pain. Like a thousand tiny needles prickling inside her brain, a wave of intrusive thoughts crept around her mind. With each step farther down the path she walked, they pressed a little harder. Only the strange familiarity of these miserable agitations allowed her to keep them at bay. Why did these feelings seem so familiar to her?
Rustling from the brush just down the path snapped her out of her thoughts. She jolted behind the twisted, dead bark of a tree beside her. Peeking her head around, she witnessed a thick-shelled fiend emerging onto the pathway. She had seen this kind of fiend numerous times before over the years, but something looked amiss with this one.
Veins of glowing green crawled across its shell forming a stringy web. Its eyes burned a fiery orange. Even from a great distance, Yuna could feel waves of anger or rage radiating from the fiend. Something wasn't right with it, and she had no desire to determine why. Holding her breath, she waited for it to pass by her. It continued in the direction she had just come from.
When it crossed the threshold, its disfigurement vanished, leaving the appearance of a normal-looking fiend of its kind. The aura of rage completely dissipated. Rubbing her eyes in dismay, Yuna didn't believe what she just watched. Her mind couldn't wrap around the sudden change in the fiend's appearance and demeanor.
Creeping through the thickets of serpentine trees, she used the hollowed-out remains of their trunks to keep herself out of sight. Glancing at the cuts and bruises covering her arms and legs, she felt in no condition to engage in a battle. While taking time to reload her twin pistols just in case a fight became inevitable, she watched as other fiends lurked through the broken landscape. Afflicted by the same ailment as the first fiend she encountered, they radiated a deep-seated fury.
Yuna pondered if this could be Shuyin's hatred manifested in yet another heinous form. Whether directly or not, his return must have something to do with the creation of the hellscape she found herself in. A wave of guilt washed over her. She placed the blame for all this darkness squarely on her shoulders.
Like a hand squeezing around her throat, she felt herself choking on the piercing surge of sorrow thrashing at her psyche. It overwhelmed her. Grasping her hands against her head, she crouched on the dry, brittle ground, breaking down into tears. So much calamity followed her selfish pursuit of lost love that it forever fractured Shuyin and Lenne. If only she had a stronger will, she could have steered Shuyin away from his terrible ambitions. No amount of power in the world could return a lost love.
She mumbled these words to herself amongst her sobbing until a thunderous crack startled her. The ground beneath her shook with momentous force. She stumbled to stand up. Darting her head around, she tried to find the source of the sudden quaking through her watery eyes.
Behind her, a spiraling dead tree crashed to the ground. Forcing its way over the splintered remains, a towering fiend emerged. Yuna's eyes burst open at the sight of the monster revealed in front of her. Clad in a reflective crimson breastplate forged out of steel, the black skin of its muscular form stretched when it flexed its body. The air rushed across Yuna's face when it flapped its expansive wings. Thick blood veins bulged out of its muscle fibers. Four curved horns protruded from the top of its head like a warped crown.
For a moment, Yuna stood frozen in place, unable to order her body to flee out of fear. She instead followed the path of its obsidian eyes, sunk deep in its skull. It glared around its surroundings, intent on locating something. A low growl slipped from its closed mouth. When it turns its head to look to its right, Yuna forced her legs to move. Intending to sneak away quietly, she gasped when the dried-out hull of a tree crackled beneath her boot.
No longer hidden from the fiend, it spun itself around, catching Yuna directly in its sights. The fiend roared and marched towards her, using its massive, armored claws to tear away a tree impeding its path. Yuna instinctively drew her pistols and fired a barrage of bullets at her charging foe. Two bullets ricocheted off its breastplate, but two other bullets found their mark on both of its exposed shoulders. Their impact rendered the fiend stunned for a moment, causing it to lurch backward while grasping its wounds. It hissed at Yuna before a honeycomb shell surrounded it. Quickly the barrier faded away.
Testing out the potency of the magic the fiend just cast on itself, Yuna fired another bullet. Before it could impact against it, the magical barrier stopped the bullet, smashing against the honeycomb barrier. A new surge of fear jolted through Yuna.
Wholly unprepared to face an adversary of this magnitude by herself, Yuna sprinted further into the desolate landscape, using the snaking vines and twisted trees as her sole advantage over the fiend. After rampaging through the unfavorable terrain, the fiend growled and spread its giant bat-like wings, taking to the sky. A sparkling trail of pyreflies swirled behind in its wake.
Its shadow cast over Yuna, blotting out what little light shone in this part of the Farplane. Realizing she couldn't outrun the flying fiend, she jammed her boot into the ground and spun herself around. With both pistols drawn, she aimed into the air, firing a flurry of bullets at her pursuer. It twirled its body around, using its sprawling wings to deflect away the bullets. It then landed with a deafening thud, shaking the ground underneath her.
"What are you?" called Yuna, realizing this fiend was not like any other she had faced before.
It grasped its long, taloned hands into fists. Pain or hatred radiated off the scowl on its face. Yuna couldn't tell which, but its sharp, ravenous gaze shot deep into her soul. Panting heavily still from her sprint, she wondered why the fiend hadn't attacked her again. The monster instead looked her over with contempt in its eyes. She couldn't comprehend why it showed her such disdain.
Yuna again asked, "What has made you so bitter?"
After a low, husky growl, it answered. "We are both . . . afflicted by the same pain . . . unrequited love."
Yuna gasped. "No, it can't be."
Those words echoed in her mind. She recalled their conversation, which she always believed to be just a dream, years ago when her former aeon, Shiva, had knocked her unconscious. Unlike the confident and gentle songstress with flowing brown hair she knew, the bestial fiend standing before Yuna resembled nothing of Lenne. Somehow it knew those words from the past, but how did Lenne's sphere survive?
"Lenne, is that really you?"
Bursting out a guttural screech, the fiend shot a wave of white-hot fire at Yuna. Its magical fire shrieked by her, blowing her hair and clothing around with gale-force intensity. Though the heat burned her skin, she didn't flinch. The flare passed by her, leaving her unharmed.
"Have you lost all of your hope?" Yuna felt her breath stick to her throat.
The fiend bowed its head. "There never . . . was . . . hope."
"I'm sorry," said Yuna. "It's my fault this all happened."
A docile expression washed over the fiend's face. "This darkness . . . was cast . . . long ago."
Yuna smiled through the tears forming in her eyes. "But there's still hope. You're still alive and so is Shuyin."
"No!" bellowed the fiend. "No more!"
Rushing at Yuna, the fiend swiped at her with its lanky, clawed fingers. Ducking her body, she barely escaped its grasp and fell on her back. She crawled backward from the path of the fiend's repeated stomps of its massive feet. A cluster of pyreflies sputtered in the air after each impact. Rolling over, she scrambled to rise and rush away.
The chase resumed. Yuna ran as fast as she could away from the fiend. The fear of her advisory had been replaced by the fear that Lenne had gone too deep into the shadows. The same thought raced through Yuna's mind—was she lost forever? Another blast of intense heat zoomed over Yuna's head, exploding on a twisted tree near where she ran toward. Hot ash and splinters rained down on her.
She fired back a panicked shot from her pistol, then ran down a hill toward a waterfall. Pyreflies swarmed around the cascading water, their usual high-pitched symphony replaced with a solemn dirge. Hurling another blast of magical fire at Yuna, the impact flung her into the pool of water surrounding the waterfall's base. She slammed into the water, momentarily stunning her. Quickly she came to her senses, opening her eyes and holding in as much breath as she could. The murky water stung her eyeballs and inflamed her eyelids and nostrils.
Sparse light penetrated the soupy liquid she swam in. Feeling around with her hands, she drifted under the water without a destination. Since she hadn't heard another crash into the water, she listened, trying to hear if the fiend still lurked above. Fighting her body's instinct, her chest felt like it would collapse if she held her breath any longer. Her right hand brushed against a rocky ledge. She used the last of her energy to pull her head up out of the water.
Her lungs filled with air still tinged with the taste of bitter ash. Blinking the dusky water from her eyes, her vision cleared enough for her to search her surroundings. The fiend no longer patrolled the base of the waterfall. Yuna spotted it flying high above, tracing a path around the large pool. She took a deep breath and lowered her head under the water again. This time she swam toward the waterfall itself, using its whitewater to shield herself from view.
Her heart raced the entire time she watched the winged fiend glide across the air, arcing back and forth along the ovular pool. Yuna guessed it would take most of a day to climb to its height, making it in line with the crest of the waterfall. Careful to stay retreated behind the falling water, she dared not stir until the fiend flew out of sight. She listened for several minutes when the sound of its flapping wings faded away until satisfied it had left the area.
She emerged from underneath the tumbling water, feeling her heart rate calm enough to clarify her thoughts. Intense guilt quickly replaced the fear that had gripped her. Whatever luck or miracle had saved Lenne from destruction didn't save her from the corruption of her despair. Having come so close to reuniting the two lovers only for them both to become the darkest forms of themselves crushed Yuna. Pulling herself out of the water, she slammed her fist into the ground.
The cool air chilled the water dripping on her skin. Retreating to a small alcove in the cliffside near the waterfall, she wrung out her clothing before curling up into a ball. Her entire body ached with fatigue from fighting Lord Zaon and fleeing Lenne. Her stomach grumbled, but she saw no source of food in sight. Leaning her head against the smoothed rock of the cliff, she closed her eyes. Yuna tried to make sense of it all with the last bit of energy she had in her. As she drifted off to sleep, images of the day jumbled together in her mind in a mixed-up stream of consciousness.
Hoping the thick bunches of wiry vines would be enough to obscure her presence, Yuna looked through them to spy on the fiend that Lenne had become. She rubbed her eyes, which still felt heavy from a relatively sleepless night. With the sky in a constant state of cloudy twilight, she didn't know what constituted day and night on the Farplane. She preferred the hazy form of consciousness she experienced rather than the torment her sleep had inflicted on her.
Pushing aside her dark thoughts, she returned her focus to the fiend lurking nearby. Its milky shadow loomed over the ground it trod upon. Occasionally it stretched out its massive wings, forcefully pushing aside anything within its reach. Yuna wondered what, if anything, crossed its mind. Is the fiend truly Lenne, or did only remnants of her spirit remain? She never studied the activity of a fiend before. The thought never occurred to her in the past.
For hours, Yuna followed the fiend around the decayed area of the Farplane, observing its every action, no matter how subtle. Keeping a distance, Yuna tracked the stream of pyreflies following the fiend. She followed the creature from one end of the dark wilderness to the other, realizing the fiend never stepped outside the mutated landscape. Everything seemed aimless to her, like a bored seagull wandering the beaches in Besaid.
Nothing the fiend did gave her any indication it had a purpose, except when it screeched. At random times, the fiend stopped abruptly, put its clawed hands against its head, and cried shrill. Every time the fiend cried out, Yuna's heart skipped a beat. The pain in its voice reverberated in her with the same pain Lenne used to. Once the sound finished echoing across the realm, the fiend resumed its aimless pursuits.
She wiped away a tear from her tired eyes and continued to trail it. After another long amount of time winding through the dead trees, the fiend led her to the edge of another cliff. Out of the corner of her eye, Yuna spotted a rock outcropping. Just below that, a rocky pillar jutted up out of the foggy ether far below. She gasped when she made out what lay on the pillar.
A machina of some sort, long since rendered useless by the effects of time, rested atop the pillar. A glimmer of light sparkled from the rusted remains. Scurrying closer, she squinted to try to make out the source of the light. Lodged within the machinery, an orange sphere glowed. Gasping to herself, Yuna realized it must be Lenne's sphere. Somehow it survived Vegnagun's explosion and came to rest stuck inside the machina on the pillar. Clutching her hand against her heart, she hoped reclaiming the sphere would be the key to emancipating Lenne from her fiend form.
A genuine smile crossed Yuna's face. Her stomach fluttered knowing she had the opportunity to correct the mistake she made two years ago. She ran toward the outcropping, the sphere glowing to her like a beacon in the night. A ravenous hiss swelled in her ears. Spinning herself around, Yuna had barely enough time to spot the fiend baring down on her from the sky. She tried to dodge its giant hand. Its strike connected fully against her body, sending her spiraling to the ground. Dirt smothered her face. The grime in her eyes momentarily blinded her.
Yuna spat out dirt from her mouth and wiped her eyes. By the time she regained her senses, the fiend grasped her neck with its hand. She could feel its talons closing around her. It squeezed out what little air she could breathe. Her legs dangled in the air when the fiend lifted her off the ground. She put her hands against its arm in a vain attempt to dislodge herself.
"He'll never know . . . I loved him," the fiend hissed.
Yuna felt her mind fading. Darkness invaded the peripherals of her vision. She couldn't end like this—not so close to Lenne's sphere. Unable to refill her lungs, she knew she only had one recourse. Using the last of her strength, she drew her pistols and fired them point-blank at the fiend's head. Her fingers pulled the triggers, even after nothing but clicking sounds emanated from the guns.
The blasts staggered the fiend, drawing out clusters of pyreflies from the inflicted wounds. It released its grip over Yuna, and she fell to the ground. Pain shot through her neck. Coughing while grabbing her throat, she gasped for air. Light returned to her vision. Though still woozy, she saw the fiend stagger around, deeply damaged by her gunfire.
Without hesitation, Yuna crawled to the edge of the cliff and climbed down to the outcropping. She held on to her head and closed her eyes, still unable to keep her balance. Behind her, the fiend roared. She could feel the ground shake as it marched toward her. Opening her eyes, she looked upon the pillar. It wasn't connected to the outcropping in any way, but she believed she could jump to it. The fiend spread its wings and flew at her. Knowing this was her only chance, she took a deep breath and sprinted to the edge of the outcropping.
Leaping through the air, her boots skidded on the stone surface of the platform. She crashed into the machina bolted onto the pillar. The impact knocked out the sphere wedged in between two gears. It rolled to Yuna, gently tapping against her leg before coming to a rest. Lunging her body forward, she scooped it up in her hands and cradled it in her arms. Its warm, orange light shined on her face.
"No, you mustn't!" cried a voice beside her.
Looking up, Yuna saw Lenne, not as a fiend but as herself, standing before her. A ring of shimmering pyreflies encircled her ghostly form. At first, Yuna ducked her head, not wanting to see what terrible expression Lenne must have worn on her face. After her grave mistake two years ago, she knew Lenne hated her.
Lenne continued her plea. "Please, don't do this. Don't fall into my despair again."
Yuna gasped and raised her head. She witnessed no animosity on Lenne's face. The songstress stood with her hands clasped together in front of her chest, looking down at Yuna with distress in her eyes. Following Lenne's gaze, Yuna realized Lenne wasn't looking at her, but the sphere nuzzled in her arms. Her eyes drifted down to the sphere as well, its glow reflecting on her hands. Not only did it house Lenne's spirit, but it stood as a symbol of Yuna's promise to her.
Rising to her feet, Yuna locked eyes with Lenne. The two women stood as reflections of each other—years of unrequited love left an excruciating toll on their hearts. A part of Yuna feared this would become her end if she didn't do something to change one of their fates.
Yuna sighed. "I'm sorry for all of this. I thought if he could feel your presence he would stop. If I thought he would—"
"Please, don't apologize," interjected Lenne. "You aren't responsible for Shuyin's actions."
"I know. But I made a promise to you," said Yuna, shedding a tear.
Lenne stepped closer. "You harbored me and all my pain while trying to save Spira from his foolish pursuits. You did more than anyone could ever have asked for."
"Thank you," whispered Yuna.
"Tell me, did you find your love?" Lenne asked.
Yuna's eyes opened wide. The question caught her off guard. When it finally sunk into her mind, a melancholy chill washed over her.
"No, the Fayth must not have been able to bring him back" she replied. "But I have someone else now who I like, though it's not the same."
Closing her eyes, Lenne let out a long sigh. "I'm sorry, Yuna."
"It's alright. I've come to terms with it. Well, as best as I can."
Lenne flashed her a bleak smile. "Try your best. Don't become what I have."
"Shuyin would be devastated to see what he's done to you," Yuna growled while feeling a sudden jolt of anger course through her.
"It's not because of anything he did," Lenne explained. "It's because he is gone forever. I have nothing to direct all the crushing weight of my feelings. All I'm reduced to is darkness now."
Yuna shook her head. "But he's not gone. Shuyin still lives."
"What?" gasped Lenne.
"It's true! Somehow he survived, and he still is searching for a way to reunite with you."
Lenne covered her face with her hand. "I . . . I can't believe it."
Yuna wrapped her arms around Lenne, embracing her in silence. She listened to her friend weeping on her shoulder. The tears moistened her skin. Though an ethereal form, Yuna could feel a tingling on her fingertips as she stroked Lenne's hair. The agony in her sobs sent shockwaves of pain through Yuna. Holding her friend tight, she contemplated any recourse to help her.
Realizing what she must do, Yuna smiled. "I will help you, Lenne."
Calming herself down, Lenne looked up at Yuna. "How? Will you destroy me now that I am a fiend?"
"No, I will fulfill my promise to you. At least one of us still has a chance to be loved. I will see it through."
Pushing herself away, Lenne turned away from Yuna. "You can't! I will only hurt you again!"
"I know what will happen, but I will take it on anyway," said Yuna. "Your love is the only thing that will stop Shuyin."
Slowly turning around, Lenne nodded to Yuna and smiled. "You truly are the greatest hope Spira has ever had."
Pressing the sphere against her heart, Yuna reconnected it to her Garment Grid. In a bright flash, pyreflies swarmed around her, engulfing her form in a dazzling array of prismatic luminescence. Rainbow trails of light drew circles around her shape. In an instant, a ruffled blue top and black lace skirt replaced her clothing. When the pyreflies' light receded, she saw the blue glovelets covering her arms. She ran her hands down the white ruffles on her shirt, reminded of how much she missed their texture against her skin.
A rush of indescribable pain and despair surged through her mind. Overwhelmed by the avalanche of emotions, she fell to her knees. She screamed, her voice echoing across the Farplane. Gasping for air, it felt like all the blood in her body rushed up into her head. Her heart thumped with fervor in her chest.
When her cry ended, Yuna opened her eyes. The immense pain had subsided, retreating deep within her as quickly as it burst out of her. She stood up, and a swell of joy sprung up inside her. Her feet began to move on their own. Dancing across the platform, her cries of glee rang out across the land.
The wave of joy subsided soon after, and she felt her emotions normalize. A faint smile remained on her face. Closing her eyes, she could sense Lenne's presence within her again. It seemed as if Lenne had taken a glass shard from Yuna's broken heart and mended the hole it had left. Though a part of her heart had been healed, like two years ago, a maelstrom swirled deep within the peripherals of her psyche. The darker parts of Lenne still lingered.
Soon Yuna realized her reticence to understand Lenne's raw, weaving emotions caused her own emotional decay two years ago. Even though she understood her situation better than she did in the past, the guilt of the pain she caused Lenne still held a grip over her. Lenne missed Shuyin, just as Yuna missed Tidus. Even in all the darkness shrouding what the man she loved had been, Lenne longed for a single embrace or a solitary kiss. A thousand years had fabricated an indescribable yearning.
Yuna wanted to push away these feelings but allowed them to permeate her. She promised to carry this burden. Although she didn't know yet how best to manage the overflow of emotions, she would allow Lenne to feel through her.
Tipping her head to the sky, Yuna noticed the curtain of black clouds dissipating, freeing the stars above to shine again. She blew out a long sigh, her eyes remaining fixated on the skies above. Taking the time to let her mind settle, she looked down at the ancient machine fixed to the pillar by her feet.
Splotches of orangish rust covered most of its metallic form. Her eyes followed the sharp lines of the boxy apparatus. On its top, a large, circular disc with a hole in the center exposed clutters of wires inside. Dirt and grime covered the inside. Out the left and right sides of the machine, two thick cables ran down the edge of the pillar. Eventually, they disappeared into the cloudy mist far below.
Yuna dared not to touch the control panel on the side facing her. She had more pressing matters to resolve—how would she escape the Farplane this time? Jumping from the pillar back onto the outcropping, she set out to venture on until she came to an exit. She dearly hoped her friends were looking for her, else she feared she would be lost in the Farplane forever.
