I'm so so so so sorry for this big delay, so many things accumulated this last two weeks. My last week of classes of my master's degree with the presentation of some papers, as well as my boyfrined visiting me, my birthday and a trip that took me away from my computer.

Fear not, I won't abandon this fanfiction, I'm like 25 chapters ahead so I have a lot of material waiting to be released ;)

Anyway I want to thank all my new followers and the one's that put my story as their favorite, you all rock so much.

A big shout out to Gina, you reviews always make my day I swear. glad you liked jesse's plan, see how you like this chapter :3 carole's reaction had to be part of this fic, she is a women who has suffered enough, but that can make her a bit blind sided so beware, but I won't say more ;) thank you so much for your kind words. waiting for your next review then ;)

if anyone else wants to leave a review i won't complain though... please leave a review...

anyway without further ado, this long awaited chapter.

lots of spring awakening references.


By week 14 clothes were starting to stretch, considering her wardrobe consisted basically of skirts and tights, well they were starting to feel a bit…tense. They still fitted but she wasn't sure for how much longer they would, she knew that she would eventually need at least one maternity jean and then she could just wing it with hoodies for the initial part of the pregnancy. As foreign as the concept of her using hoodies and jeans felt, she would have to suck it up for the next months.

When she envisioned herself having her first child it not only was after her first Tony, it also definitely was with a little bit more economic solvency. Instead here she was scraping pennies to buy her pre-natal vitamins, pay her appointments AND afford at least a single fricking maternity jean.

A maternity bra would be nice too, lately she felt so sore that even faint grazes left her trembling and biting her lower lip from the pain.

But right now, standing in front of a shop next to the NYU building, she could only content herself with window shopping and staring longingly at maternity clothes while waiting for Jesse to finish with his classes so they could leave for the evening workshops.

"Rach why are you creepily staring at that store?" he asked amused by finding her petite friend glued to the shopwindow and scaring the saleswoman inside. "You do know you are spooking people inside… oh look you scared one costumer" he joked when a mother and her baby left the store avoiding Rachel as much as they could and looking at her warily.

"Nothing" said Rachel embarrassed as if caught red handed stealing cookies. "Can we leave? We are going to be late" she added trying to divert his attention from her previous activity.

But Jesse knew better, last time they were walking towards their usual coffee shop after rehearsals he spotted that same longing look on her face. And on her 12-week ultrasound he heard her sigh when she took her card to pay for her new pre-natal prescription, those supplements for vegan pregnant mothers had to be expensive and he was sure they were bankrupting her. She didn't have to say anything, he just knew.

He didn't exactly know what she needed right now but it had to do with maternity clothes, and even if he wasn't allowed still to access his trust fund, he wasn't completely broke, he had savings from his nights working at the karaoke bar. Now, tricking Rachel into accepting such an obvious attempt from his help would be challenging; she knew he was taking care of her and he knew she was aware of that but they never acknowledged it out loud to not alter that delicate balance in their friendship. And with Jesse's staying from afar approach, she had come to accept it without opposing, but this was more direct and she was a pig-headed woman when she wanted to be one.

He would find his way though, but first he needed to know what she needed.

They resumed their trip towards the theater and were walking side by side. Jesse as the forever gentleman that he was - his parents had enrolled him in charm classes - was walking to the side of the road while Rachel was secured on his side to the one with the buildings. When they passed through another baby store and Rachel again made that expression with her eyes but more subtly, he took his chance.

"Why do they sell clothes in a baby store" he asked feigning ignorance as if he already didn't know, avoiding to exaggerate his confused look to not give away his ruse.

"Because we get the size of a whale and we need clothes that can stretch" she said looking at him as if he was dumb. He laughed because he really was channeling his inner Brittany Pearce muse, even though if his pride actually took a hit from her condescending tone.

"Don't look at me like that, my knowledge about pregnancy comes from the lacking sex education program in Ohio" he said still trying to calm his wounded pride.

Rachel really couldn't fault him for that, if Finn could believe that he got Quinn pregnant from a hot tub then she really couldn't expect much more from Jesse.

"Then that means you'll have to wear those too soon?" he added remembering the sole purpose of making an ass of himself in front of Rachel.

"Yeah, as a matter of fact I do need some maternity jean" she said agreeing with him returning her gaze to the store. "At least one would be nice" she added quietly and with a little sullen look.

"So that's what she was looking at, maternity jeans" he thought. His stomach plummeted out of guilt about upsetting her, that defeated look in Rachel's eyes didn't agree with him. He definitely preferred her condescending one from a few minutes before and a burning need to say something dumb again rose in his chest to make her erase the current one and replace it with her previous one.

But at the end it all was for the greater good and his job was not done.

"And don't they have your size?" he inquired knowing that just knowing what she was searching for wouldn't be enough.

"No, they do have the small size, I just didn't like the model enough I guess" she said dismissingly "Hey do you know when they are announcing the Tony's nominations this year?" she said almost too quickly in her attempt to change the subject.

"Bingo" he thought. And then proceeded to discuss with her why Kinky boots would be getting the most nominations this year.


"Have you told your dads about the pregnancy Rachel?" asked Kurt some days later while they were eating some muffins in the kitchen that Santana had prepared the night before - since she couldn't chip in as much as she should in the rent, the Latina girl occasionally cooked for them. It was one of those silent agreements they had but never talked about.

They had come to a peace treaty in the loft after Santana sat them both and forced them to talk about his resentment and reservation about Jesse's involvement in her life while threatening them to light on fire their Barbra and Bernadette Peters memoirs that she was holding in her hands too close to a lighter.

Kurt was still not happy about his presence but at least he no longer hissed at him whenever he came to visit Rachel at their loft.

"Yeah, two days ago. Not thrilled" she said with a sardonic smile and emphasizing with her hands.

"You are saying that he defiled my baby and left her alone with his child? Oh, he is lucky he is no longer with us or I would send him there right now" said Leroy distressed after taking a good 2 minutes of complete silence due to shock.

"Silence Leroy, don't speak ill of the dead please" said Hiram trying to shush Leroy. "We will support you in your decision honey, just let me prepare a scotch to your father and call us in 2 days"

"I think they are now getting to a place of better understanding and acceptance" she said with a tense smile trying to not think of their conversation.

"Well at least the cats out of the bag I guess" he said with a little nervous laugh while fidgeting with his hands.

A knock on the door interrupted their conversation. Kurt went to open it and found an amazon package at his feet that was forwarded to Rachel saying "Happy Hannukah".

"Weird… Hannukah has been over for a good month, hasn't it?" asked Kurt while handing the package to Rachel and downplaying his interest in Rachel's mysterious out of date Hannukah present.

"Yeah, must be late mail from my parents I suppose?" she began to answer not really sure where this came from but then immediately recognized Jesse's penmanship and quirked an eyebrow without voicing her suspicions in front of Jesse's biggest hater. These last peaceful days had been nice, she wasn't about to poke the bear.

When she opened the box, she found a pair of maternity jeans and a warm feeling spread on her chest that reached the tip of her fingers and toes. A calm lovingly smile formed in her face as she grazed the piece of clothes in front of her.

Jesse had a way of honoring his promise of helping her that she found adorable. Always from a distance and almost implicit, just to not upset her or embarrass her. So many situations where she didn't express how much or how it affected her but somehow, he always knew and found a way to fix it for her when she didn't know how. Like this.

Now their last conversation about maternity clothes made more sense and she found a sense of relief in knowing that he wasn't that uneducated about female reproduction, that thought made her laugh a bit.

"What's so funny" Kurt inquired while analyzing the calligraphy from the note trying to get the information from the one who sent it "Are those maternity pants?"

"Nothing, a Brittany-esque conversation just made more sense" she said still laughing while going to her room to leave the package out of the prying eyes of her best friend.


"Rocking those pants huh Rach?" Jesse said when they finished their scenes and giving her a knowing smile.

"Yeah, such a mystery, they just came in the mail the other day" she replied returning the same smile and looking at him in the eye.

Lately they were able to have conversations just by looking at each other, if Rachel had to pinpoint her favorite aspect from her friendship with Jesse, it was those wordless conversations. And right now, she tried to convey all her gratefulness in her eyes to which Jesse just nodded and winked at her getting the message.

"Gosh, you two are so sickening. Get a room" said Skylar while rolling his eyes passing through and interrupting their moment.

Everyone in the cast knew about Rachel's dead ex fiancée (not the pregnancy though) and they had been a great help these past weeks to give her life a sense of normalcy - to which she was really grateful - and even though they all knew Jesse and Rachel were just friends, their chemistry in the play and close friendship made it a common theme of good intention mockery among the cast. That's why Jesse and Rachel just laughed, that comment coming from any other person could depress her but not from her Spring Awakening family.

"Great! I found you guys still in rehearsals" said Steven storming through the door with Duncan close to him. This was of common recurrence, they usually worked on the scenes with Michael and Kim most of the time but from time to time, Steven and Duncan appeared out of nowhere with a new song or a new addition to a scene; usually when rehearsals were about to finish, much to everyone's chagrin.

"Duncan and I made some changes in the lyrics and the music key of "Once in a pirate night" do you mind staying a bit more?" he said addressing Rachel and Jesse. The rest of the cast exhaled a sigh out of relief, that rehearsal had been long and Jesse and Rachel were the only ones who never minded staying a bit late per Steven's and Duncan's request.

Right now, the workshop's hot topic was the permanence of "Once in a pirate night" on the play. That one had to be the song that had suffered most changes since the beginning of the first workshops according to Michael.

Since it was the song that they would sing in the beginning of the second act and right after Wendla and Melchior finished having sex it had to be a powerful one. And neither Steven nor Kim where completely entrapped by the one they currently were singing. Not that it was the actor's fault, it was something that the song was lacking but none of them had been able identify it.

"Not at all" said Jesse and Rachel at unison. Jesse's words of becoming indispensable to this play resonated in their heads all the time so they were always the first ones to arrive and were the last to leave if no one needed them anymore.

"Freaky" said Duncan with a half-smile. He had become used to their weird connection but it never ceased to amaze him how in sync his leading performers could be. He wasn't about to complain though, the play was lucky to have found them and their bucket loads of chemistry.

Steven proceeded to deliver the new sheet song in their hands so they could begin to solfege it and take in the new changes in the lyrics.

Jesse and Rachel were through a second sight read and still something didn't sound quite right to either of them. As a matter of fact, in those many hours that Rachel and Jesse spend together outside of rehearsals whether in the coffee shop or in her flat, they had been discussing this song in particular and both came to the conclusion that a new song had to be made.

"You don't look so convinced" said Steven with a faltering smile. And Rachel felt a tug in her heart, of all the production crew, Steven was the sweetest of them all and they always had such interesting discussions. She wanted to spare his feelings but changes had to be made so she decided to amuse him a bit before pulling the rug from his feet.

"Let's just sing it first" she said trying to console him finding his sulking look unbearable.

And so, they did. Steven and Duncan looked frustrated because it hadn't convinced them either.

"Steven, Duncan. If I may" began Jesse "I think the song needs to go" he said bluntly without a hint of emotion in his face, and Rachel chastised him with a look, she agreed with him but he didn't need to be so brusque. "Always a St. Jerk I guess" she thought and sighed.

"The thing is guys; I think it's too lovey-dovey. Jesse and I have read the original Wedekind play and we know that's its originally a rape scene, and even though that's been changed for this musical, the next scenes are just about the consequences of their actions not the budding romance between them" she elaborated to deliver their point and softening Jesse's abrupt verdict.

"As Rachel said, it's too heartfelt, it needs a little bit more of angst and gloomy feeling" he completed her line of thought while nodding his head.

"Huh" said Steven trying make sense of their take and Duncan just nodded.

"Guess the puppies do have point Steven" Duncan said once a key for a somber song resonated in his head and he decided that could work.

"No longer puppies I guess" agreed Steven. "We'll have something for tomorrow then, if we are not here by the end of rehearsals wait for us 20 minutes 'kay?" and he bolted out of the theatre.

"Keep on like that and we might consider upgrading you to creative staff, kids" said Duncan before sprinting to catch on Steven.

When they were sure they left, Jesse fist bumped the air and said "Yes!".

And thus "There once was a pirate" was born next day.


Next day came with Steven and Duncan again bolting at the end of the rehearsal with the new song. When Rachel and Jesse read it, they felt in love with it instantly. It definitely was more in tune with the darker theme of the second act.

They were singing it with the accompaniment of Duncan's guitar and while Jesse was singing the last verse of the song Rachel felt a flutter in her belly. It came as a surprise; she was only 4 days shy of reaching her 16 weeks. She gently placed her hand on her belly and a warm feeling spread through all of her body.

They ended the song and the fluttering inside of her stopped. And disappointment lodged in her chest, feeling it move was a declaration that the baby was a real thing and she rapidly found herself being in love with it. She wanted to feel it again.

"It sounds so great, so hauntingly beautiful guys! I love it" began to say Jesse exhilarated short of breath. Rachel just nodded still collecting her thoughts after the immensity of what she had just felt. Jesse did take notice but decided to put a pin on it and decided to deflect attention from her by giving his appreciation of certain parts of the lyrics that had touched him.

"Love the imagery of the song, Steven I don't know how you do it but you are always able to put real images of pirates and meadows in my head. Well, I think we will be leaving now, I'm beat, coming Rach?" he rushed saying those last parts and Rachel thanked him for bailing her out.


"May I ask what got you mute?" Jesse inquired bumping slightly her side while they were walking, he didn't want to pressure her but Rachel had the tendency of lashing out if she didn't talk about her feelings on the spot.

"I felt a flutter while we were singing" she said with a soft smile while caressing her belly. Jesse could swear it was almost like she was glowing from happiness and that made his heart beat really fast. She always looked beautiful, but there was something about her calm look in her big expressive eyes and her quiet smile in her plump lips that took his breath away.

"Really?" he said once he regained his ability to breathe normally. Placing his arms on her shoulders while walking and looking down on her due to the height difference and with a lovestruck smile - that he tried to tone down to not scare her with his intensity, he added "Can I try to feel it?"

"I don't think you will feel anything, it's too early, but you can try" she shrugged nonchalantly, unaware of the resounding of Jesse's beating heart in his ears.

It was a moment of connection with Rachel, but also with the baby that was currently growing inside of her and that he had previously met in Dr. Green's consult. And he couldn't be more overwhelmed by it.

Jesse proceeded to put his hand above her belly and Rachel took a good look of him. His smile was so honest and his eyes were full of surprise and wonder when looking at her slightly growing belly.

She still wasn't anywhere near to think of anything romantically-related and especially with Jesse. But she was amazed by how Jesse could so selflessly be able to feel joy in a situation that if roles were reversed where she knew he was having a baby with someone she didn't see eye to eye, she would be having a hard time to accept it and be supportive.

And yet Jesse had become her person, her shoulder to lean on, the person who kept an eye on her, the one who read her so perfectly and knew the right things to say for her to listen. She felt so grateful for his presence in her life. She knew that the baby had kept her going but Jesse was the reason she felt alive.

"You are right I don't feel a thing" he laughed still with his hand on her belly and then looked at her eyes with an affectionate smile "But I do think you already have a little baby bump you know?"

She nodded "Hence the need for the maternity jeans, thank you Jesse, I really needed those and I couldn't afford them just yet" he removed his hand from her abdomen and she took a step back because she felt they were too close, not that she felt uncomfortable – though she should, she always felt at ease with him, but she didn't want to give him any reasons to be confused. With how amazing her friend could be, that was the least she could do.

"Don't even mention it Rach, if I can help you I will" he winked at her and moved forward to resume their pace.

After a while of comforting silence she realized how the baby had began to move when Jesse sang.

"I think the baby began to flutter because of the sound of your voice you know?" she blurted out unable to control her mouth. "I mean that baby has done nothing but heard you and me sing since the beginning" she ended laughing nervously and looking away feeling a blush creeping on her face realizing how that must have sounded – so much for keeping things cool she thought.

He laughed and again his arm returned to the place over her shoulders "I don't think so Rach, I read babies can hear external sounds past week 16" he stated returning to more neutral topics.

"And yet some days ago you didn't know about the coexistence of maternity clothes in baby stores St. James" she replied with a quirked eyebrow not missing a beat.

"Ok, sue me I read some baby books to know what to expect. You are already a diva as it is, a pregnant Rachel Berry requires a bit of previous research" he said embarrassed by his admission and looking at anything but Rachel so she couldn't notice his blush.

That took her by a surprise but she decided to put a pin on her feelings about it, besides the image of Jesse reading baby books was heartwarming. And enough to put a smile on her lips.

She really was a lucky girl.


go listen to once upon a pirate night and there once was a pirate so you can get the context of this songs, besides they are amazing. duncan sheik has even released a demo singing there once was a pirate and it IS hauntingly beautiful, so ethereal and dark.