Chapter Thirty-Three: Ever Flowing Rivers

Nightfall along the riverbank of the Han was hot and humid, the depth of the summer season apparent to all within the imperial encampment on the Chinese side of the flowing waters. The lights in the distance from the high walls of Xiangyang shone down upon the sweeping expanse of tents and temporary huts which housed the forces loyal to the Emperor. Small detachments of guards roamed about as the sounds of catapults and trebuchets launching ordinance still echoed from the northern edges of the place.

Shifu had spent the past several hours wandering the camp, feeling like a fading shadow of himself. There were so many passing faces here and there, carrying so many different emotions, but none of them could possibly know his pain in this moment. He had always chosen to suffer alone. All his life, the red panda had secretly believed that - on a fundamental level - we were all ultimately alone in our deepest sadness. He had made it through so much of his life without allowing himself to fall into such devastating emotional turmoil, but the nigh-impenetrable defenses he'd built around his heart could not always remain undaunted.

Shifu had experienced his moments of weakness - two of them in particular. He couldn't help it. He had also once been an orphan left upon the steps. Twice, he tried to do what his own father had not; and he had now failed both times. Tai Lung… he had poured his very soul into that child - everything he had. He even named him after the Dragon Scroll, the supposed goal that the powerful snow leopard prodigy was destined to achieve… or so he had thought. Shifu had realized too late that he had only been trying to live vicariously through his adopted son; to earn the legendary title that he himself had never been judged fit by Oogway to inherit. The red panda pushed the boy too hard, blinded by his ambition to create the perfect warrior.

In retrospect, the result was never in question. Tai Lung was rejected from the Dragon Warrior title just the same, and he became an unrecognizable monster. The child he had raised died that day, and a part of Shifu along with him.

The universe had taunted him with another chance.

He knew it from the very first instant he saw her that day at Bao Gu: strength, power, and intelligence. Potential. His heart having been hardened to stone, he tried to remove ego from this second attempt. No grandiose nominative determinism - just what she was. Just Tigress.

As the tiger aged, her innate childlike glee evaporated away under the heat of constant training day in and day out - but there was no praise this time. No feeding of acclaim or lofty dreams. It was left unsaid. Shifu was still trying to create the Dragon Warrior; but once again, he realized his failure too late. He had loved his son for his fiery passion that - in the end - had burned too hotly. But in his daughter, there was only a cold determination for duty. He had robbed her life of joy, pushing her to chase dreams that were originally his own. Tigress was no monster, but the flames of life had all but been extinguished within her when she was only still a child.

He was still holding onto the broken Mahjong tile.

Shifu stopped walking through the camp, allowing the various unaware passers-by to continue weaving around him. He was at his destination anyway. Stowing the splintered piece in his robe and turning off the main pathway, the red panda entered the temporary longhouse that was the camp's primary infirmary. He solemnly passed by dozens of injured, sick, and wounded soldiers lying about the place as he searched for one in particular. Nearing the end, he saw him at last - Crane. The bird was upright now, seemingly having recovered somewhat from his harrowing flight into the Chinese positions earlier that day.

Seeing Shifu approach, the bird folded his wings in a saluting gesture, "Master."

Shifu didn't acknowledge the formality.

"How did it happen, Crane?" he asked tersely. "How did it really happen?"

The avian master's face gave some hint of how overwhelmed he was by the question, as there was simply too much he wanted to say at once. Shifu knew his student well enough to specify his inquiry for both of their sakes.

"Just… start at the beginning."


In another part of the great camp, the remaining members of the Furious Five sat amongst a poorly-lit open area that was not nearly as polluted by tents, carts, or other materials of war. Despite the currently-undecided battle going on around them, the mood of the masters of the Jade Palace was one of defeat. Their winged friend had returned to them bearing only the most grim of tidings, the sort they had previously hoped to go a lifetime without having to hear.

They had been given food by the nearby soldiers - who were eternally grateful for their efforts in the ongoing fight - but it had hardly been touched. Sitting around a stained wooden table that had seen much better days, they remained wordlessly looking at one another, collectively at a loss.

Mantis was the first to make yet another attempt to eat something, grabbing up a pair of chopsticks - only to cast them aside again just as quickly.

"I hate this." he said. "All of it."

"Hate what?" Viper asked, even though she hadn't really needed to.

"We should have been there - all of us. As a team." the insect master declared with frustration. "None of this would have happened! And now Po is some… some freakish hell-demon and Tigress is-"

He couldn't finish the statement, and the others would not dare to, either.

"We couldn't have known." Monkey stated blankly. "There's nothing we could do and you know that."

Mantis nodded, but his face showed he was still angry.

"Screw this. We don't need food - we need drinks!" he announced, waving over the soldiers who had been partying over at a nearby campfire.

With a raucous uproar, the grizzled mercenaries brought over the very strongest mi jiu they had on hand. The drinks hit the table and Mantis was the first to raise his glass using both of his appendages.

"To Tigress!"

The others saluted his toast and downed the stiff fiery beverages. It made the hurt fade ever so slightly.

"Agh - let's do another!" Monkey demanded.

And they did.

"It's funny. I still see it just like it was yesterday…" Mantis trailed off. "Tigress taking down that boar with us. At the time, that was the coolest shit I had ever seen."

Monkey nodded with a sentimental smile, "Agreed."

"What I'll miss most about Tigress," Viper added unprompted, "was when she pushed us all to be better - stronger - working together. She was my sister. When I was a little girl, I always wanted to have one; I ended up finding one as an adult."

The other two masters smiled, thinking of fond memories and past victories as they refilled their drinks once more.

"She was never impressed by any of my jokes." Monkey mused, shooting back another cup of the liquid. "I kinda respected that, honestly. Stone cold."

"There was that one time, though." Viper said, smiling now as she began to feel the effects of the mi jiu.

"Oh yeah!" Mantis said, eyes widening as he remembered too. "Madame Liang's place… about three years before Po came along. Oh man - was that a night!"

Viper giggled with nostalgic mischief, "She'd clearly never had any drinks before - not like that at least."

"You could say that." Monkey said as he matched the snake's smile. "Got all up on the table and everything, saying she was a 'heavenly dragon' or some nonsense."

Mantis laughed out loud now, recalling the fond memory, "Oh yeah - we would still be paying off the damages to that place if Oogway hadn't vouched for us after… gods that was crazy."

"Just shows," Viper added, "she had that side to her as well. She was just so afraid to show it…"

The mood grew a bit somber once again.

"Yeah." Mantis said, the look on his face revealing he was feeling tinges of regret. "I guess I felt bad for her sometimes. I mean… It wasn't her fault, ya know? But after Tai Lung… hoo boy."

"Shifu was different before - had to be." Monkey correctly discerned. "Watching those two together was like torture at times - why wouldn't they ever talk?!"

"Hey - that's not for us to say." Viper said, trying to mediate things away from becoming too critical of their master. "None of us will know what it was like to truly be them… it is not our place to judge."

The two males shrugged, but they said nothing in disagreement.

"I know one thing for sure." Mantis said, bringing the conversation back to life at once. "I'm gonna miss her having my back in a tough fight. She saved all our lives - countless times."

"True." Viper said, now pouring herself another drink in a rare show of indulgence. "And when she took that shot for Po in Gongmen-"

"Crazy, I know." Monkey interrupted. "She did the very same for me once, just west of Hezhou. Leapt right in front of a strike that would have killed me for sure."

"We all show love in different ways, love for our friends - our family." Mantis said, causing the other two to glance at him with surprised looks at this unusually deep statement. "What? It's true!"

"It is." Viper giggled. "Just - it's strange that you're the one who said it!"

Mantis rolled his eyes, "Whatever. Okay - I miss her just like you guys, alright?"

"Cheers." Monkey toasted, clinking his next drink against Mantis' cup. "You're right."

The three continued reminiscing, thoroughly drowning their sorrows as the night grew deeper. They no longer felt the distant rumble of battle, only the long-gone memories of their departed friend.


"And that's when she told me," Crane struggled to get out, once again fighting off the urge to weep, "To take Mei and go. I tried-"

Shifu had not said anything for several minutes as Crane had been recounting the events of the final stand of the masters at The Black Lotus of Hēishén.

"I tried to stay and fight them with her, but she pushed me away. She already knew it was no use. Not with Po becoming… whatever that thing was."

"So you left my daughter to die?" Shifu asked, breaking his silence. "That was it?"

"Master, there was nothing more I could do! She sacrificed herself so that we could escape, and even then we only barely did…"

Shifu lowered his face into his palm, disconsolate. Crane was terrified of what he should say next. The red panda looked away as if about to deliver a fierce condemnation to the bird, but at the last moment, seemed to change his mind. The old master just exhaled slowly with profound sorrow on his features.

"Do you think… Do you know if she suffered long, Crane?"

Crane shook his head at once, "No. The whole tower collapsed - it was over quickly."

Shifu seemed to take some miniscule amount of relief from this, but overall his expression told Crane that perhaps he had been better just lying to his master about everything he'd said from the beginning. In all his years at the Jade Palace, he was unaccustomed to seeing the red panda so distraught; he could certainly understand why, though. Neither of them said anything for nearly a minute.

"And what of Po?" Shifu continued on, looking downward. "Do you know the whereabouts of the Dragon Warrior, at least?"

"The Mongols took him away - but he is alive, as far as I know."

Shifu gave a weak nod, "Then we must try to fight on for his sake; perhaps, we can manage to reverse the effects the relic has had upon him."

The avian master found it to be difficult to have much optimism surrounding this notion, but out of sympathy for his master he agreed, "Yes… We have to try, at least."

"The knowledge I have of the Dagger of Deng-Wa is only fragmentary. I haven't the first notion of how - or why - it has done this."

"In that regard," a voice spoke from behind the two, "I may be able to help."

Shifu turned around to see the golden cat master, Mei Ling. She had clearly found the strength to stand and come find them amidst the throngs of dead and dying in the improvised hospital. The bandages over her injured side were steeped in blood, her movements clearly having partially reopened her wounds. The red panda couldn't stand to face her - he had only one thought in mind. This was the one Crane had saved instead of Tigress.

In reply to her sudden arrival, the red panda master looked back to Crane and met his eyes with his own. The bird master knew exactly what Shifu wished to say without him having to utter a single word.

The Grandmaster of the Jade Palace turned and departed; Crane and Mei Ling were left alone to suffer in silence.


Author's Notes:

- Ok, so I am swapping this chapter with Adrift for thematic effect; fortunately, there only being a day between these updates should help avoid any confusion

- I've talked a lot in this story about Shifu's role as a father figure for not only Tigress but also Tai Lung - it was nice to finally give a chance to see his perspective on what went wrong with each of them (he's not ignorant of the mistakes he made, he's just forever afraid after what happened with Tai Lung)

- Drunk Viper, Monkey, and Mantis was incredibly fun to write! I did a bit of "method acting" for this scene let's just say... lol

- And... more Crane and Mei Ling angst! Sorry, but also, not sorry :V

- Shoutout to Ying for beta-reading once again, once again at 4am lmao XD

- Hope everyone is doing well, and thanks again for reading! Until next time!