A/N. A longer chapter than usually, but I made you wait a week! So, sorry!

It had been two days since Hakoda had come to the camp… And Aang couldn't look the man in the eyes. The moment he had felt the chief behind him, he had not been able to look him in the eyes… He had said sorry, and Hakoda had been nothing but kind, but…

But it was not alright, whatever the Water Tribe warrior said. Aang knew that Hakoda had been afraid of this, that the man was eating himself up about the fate of his children ever since he had learned with whom they were travelling… So, it was not normal that the chief wasn't angry with him. He would have accepted rage, being hit, being called names… But Hakoda had just understood. He had been open and kind, trying to calm him… But that was not what he needed. The airbender needed Hakoda to hit him, to say that it was his fault that Katara was missing.

They had sent a message to Sokka, calling him and Suki to Kirashi. Surely Zuko would want to come too, but he was needed at Fire Fountain… So they had sent a hawk with a very simple message…

Come to Kirashi.

Knowing his friends, they would have taken the fastest way to travel to them, so they could expect them any moment… But Aang felt ashamed. How could he look Sokka in the eyes, knowing that Katara had to be somewhere on the island… And say that he had done nothing? Look his friend in those ice blue eyes and say that he had done nothing to find her… Only sit and stare at the walls? How could he justify that?

By saying that he was plagued by nightmares about… About horrible things? By using the excuse that Azula might hurt Katara if he revealed his presence? Sokka would just say that he could have destroyed the wall by earthbending it… But how could he explain that deep down, he knew that he had failed in the simple mission he had given himself? To keep her safe and to give her the peace she had never known…

His nightmares were making him so tired… Each night, Aang woke up at least three or four times, lying awake trying to forget what he had seen… Spirits, don't let that be a vision of the reality… If that was real… Oh Spirits, he wouldn't survive that.

"Twinkletoes. The ships that arrived yesterday are leaving." Toph's voice came from his right. He had been sitting on a small hill outside the camp, overlooking the town and the bay. Aang had not been able to stay in the siege camp, where it stank of sweat, blood and sulphur… He had needed to get out of there, to feel the grass underneath him and the see the sky above him… He had hoped that it would chase away the bad visions…

It had not.

"I know." He sighed, looking the ships in the bay. The day before, a whole squadron of boats had appeared, and the smaller crafts that Piandao had used to ferry his troops from island to island had not engaged that fleet, afraid of being sunk… The twenty ships had just sailed right past, and had anchored in the bay. They had looked, dismayed, how the ships disembarked hundreds of people… All wearing the red of the Fire Nation.

It had clearly been reinforcements to the town, so the defenders now numbered at least five thousand if Piandao was to be believed.

"And a small ship has landed on the west coast an hour ago, scouts reported. Probably Meathead." The blind girl came to stand beside him, "Are you going to greet him like that?"

She spoke that sentence while gesturing at him… Yeah… he knew, he didn't look like himself, but he didn't care. His own person… being Aang… That was gone. It was gone, there was no place for him in this world… If the visions he was seeing were true. Then… Well, he would prefer to be dead than to live in a world where that was a reality.

"He wouldn't want to see me." Aang sighed, standing up. He would go to Appa, who had been hidden in a cave. Not the same as they had used the first time they had been here… He would stay with his bison, and he hoped Momo would find them there. He didn't want to be around people… He just wanted to know if Katara was alright…

"And why is that?" Another voice cut through Aang's thoughts, and looking down the small hill, he saw Sokka and Suki walk towards them. No… No, he couldn't see them.

"Fire Fountain?" Toph asked immediately, not bothering with niceties such as hello or how are you?

"The governor of the city has been in talks with Zuko and Iroh for a day or two… He suddenly wanted to talk, we didn't understand why. Perhaps he suddenly understood that Azula is not such a great choice. Or he thought that our trenches began to come rather close to his walls. Nonetheless, he is talking." Sokka explained, but Aang looked away, not able to keep his eyes on his friend. How could the water tribe warrior not look at him with loathing…

Spirits knew he did…. Spirits, how much Aang hated himself for not being able to do something about this whole mess…

"That sounds like that type of idiot. First, they are full of bravado, and then they realize that they are going to lose no matter what. So, he wants to save his own ass." Toph smiled grimly, but Aang felt it rather than saw it as he still kept his eyes on the town.

"And you?" He heard Sokka ask, the vibrations on the wind coming towards him… So his friend had asked the question to him… But he couldn't…

"We found Appa in the forest here… Then, the day after that, Piandao and his soldiers arrived. We hid our furry friend in a cave for the time being, as no one in the army knows who that is. And to be honest, neither do I." The earthbender's harsh tone made Aang look down towards the ground. He knew he had been acting strange… But what else could he do?

He felt Sokka and Suki look at him, and he knew they were probably pitying him…

"Well, let's go keep him company." He heard the Kyoshi Warrior speak softly, as the footsteps of two people began to lead away from him, as one pair of feet stayed close to him. A pair of feet, where one leg was supporting most of the weight of that person… So, Sokka.

"You look a mess." His friend spoke as soon as Suki and Toph were out of earshot, and Aang just nodded, still not looking him in those ice blue eyes…

"If you found Appa here… Katara must be close, right?" He felt a hand on his shoulder, but the airbender stepped away from the touch. His visions were making him weary of physical touches… And he hated it.

"I think." He answered, trying not to sound too pessimistic. Aang had been thinking it over and over… Appa could be wrong. He could have stayed in the place where she had been captured, thinking she would still be here… That was a real possibility… But Appa always knew where the people he liked where. The bison had never been difficult to lose, because he always followed… Even as a young calf, Appa had been able to find him anywhere in the temple…

"Don't do that." Sokka sighed, and Aang saw how his friend tried to enter his eyesight. Stepping to the left, he tried to keep a distance between them.

"What?" He asked, hoping it wouldn't be too obvious. Sokka didn't need to know everything that was happening in his head…

"The closing off. You do that anytime something horrible happens. Air Head, you don't get to be miserable. Your job is the simplest there is." His friend's voice sounded hard, and Aang felt how the Water Tribe warrior leaned on his leg, the uninjured one.

"It is?" He bit back, unable to hide his irritation.

"Find Katara. Can it be any more straightforward?" The airbender heard the concern and the worry underneath the hard tone, and his irritation disappeared as snow in the sun. Sokka too was worried… Aang knew that. How could he not be? Toph was right when she had been arguing with him the day before Piandao arrived…

"I know…" Aang sighed, glancing quickly towards his friend, without truly looking him in the eye. He saw that Sokka was leaning on a cane, or rather a stick. It didn't deserve the name cane, but it served its purpose. The Water Tribe warrior wore simple black trousers and a blue tunic, but had a sword at his hip.

"Well, then! What the fuck are you waiting for? You think she is in that town?" Sokka gestured wildly with the cane towards the walls, "Then, take the damn fort. We have more than enough soldiers!"

Ah. Yes… Of course… But… But how could he? If he did that, Azula would know where he was… And that he wasn't keeping away…

"Aang. Listen to me. I know we said that you should keep away… But I've been thinking. Azula knows that by using Katara as a human shield, you won't kill that bitch. But she will come out of hiding if you do just that. Instead of looking for a snow leopard caribou in a snowstorm… You lure it to you. If you ever came with me to hunt, you would know that tactic." Sokka stepped into his vision, and Aang immediately looked past the young man. His friend didn't need to know the depths of his fears… And the airbender was quite sure you could see it in his eyes.

"That town is stubbornly holding on, because they think they are safe. They think you won't come here. Show them. Show them the airbender that you are. Walk up to that gate, and demand, as Avatar, the surrender. You will keep to your principles of non-violence, and if Katara is inside that town, they will say so to keep you out." Sokka stepped towards him, and Aang had not anticipated it. He felt a hand on his chin, forcing his face straight forward. His eyes met the pale ice blue eyes of his friend… And he saw the worry, the fatigue… The same things he felt himself.

"Aang, I know you worry. I do the same thing… But these people are afraid of you, not me."

"I don't want to be feared." The airbender whispered, feeling the deep pit of despair in his gut widen with those words.

"Tough luck, you are. But I know you, you would use all things available to you to help Katara. Aang, I know we said you should keep away. But this is taking too long… We need Avatar mumbo-jumbo, some flickering tattoos. We need you. Not… this." Stepping away from him, Aang saw how Sokka's hand waved in his general direction.

"I… Sokka, you don't know what I have been seeing… Nightmares… horrible nightmares…" He began, before being cut off.

"Buddy… I know. We are both afraid! We love her more than life itself, so fuck all this! Let's go get her!" With that, Sokka pointed a finger to the town, "I took the liberty of taking… a few good men with me. They may be able to assist here."

"What?" Aang didn't understand.

"The invasion force. Bato, the tribesmen, and the earthbenders. You think they will expect to fight the enemy of a hundred years in their own country? I don't care, they are not sworn to Zuko. But what they are, is loyal. They all came when I asked, for Katara. So, Piandao may say what he wants, I came here to get my sister. And I will, with or without Piandao, or you."

Aang didn't need to look back into Sokka's eyes to see his expression. It was the same as the Water Tribe warrior had sported during the invasion. Concentrated, and enough anger to channel that force into an unbreakable will. A will that would be able to do all he promised.

"So, will you help, or are you going to mope around, as Toph's letter said?" Sokka asked.

"Toph's letter?" The blind girl was not able to write… What?

"Oh, yes, your message was brief and to the point. But Toph made sure Piandao wrote a note. And it was clear she dictated it." With that, his friend produced a small scroll, handing it to him.

Unfurling it, Aang saw the neat, trained handwriting that he supposed was the old sword master's.

"Meathead. Twinkles is being a dick, uses the three braincells all my training left him. Get down here, knock some sense in the idiot. I'm done babysitting."

And he couldn't help it. He laughed, a wet, desperate laugh, but a real one nonetheless. Another image had flashed into his mind, one with Toph trying to make Piandao write this message. In his imagination, the swordsman was rather offended by the blind girl's language, but she would not have cared…

"Have you been that bad?" Sokka asked, and for the first time, Aang looked in his eyes willingly, nodding. Yeah… Bad dreams. That had been all. Of course, Sokka also had them. All the people that loved Katara would… Toph too… Suki… Zuko… And Hakoda. Spirits, Hakoda!

"Your father is here!" He spoke as soon as the name of the chief crossed his mind, "He arrived a few days ago… I may have ignored him…" Aang admitted.

"Wait… Dad is here, the guy so afraid something would happen to Katara… And he hasn't pummeled you into the ground?"

Aang shook his head, also wondering why Hakoda had not done exactly that.

"Welcome to the family!" Sokka laughed, but not his usual jovial laugh, the one that resounded from walls and filled the air. No, this one was more measured, and Aang supposed it was all his friend could muster at this moment.

"So… What should I do?" The airbender whispered, returning to what mattered.

"Aang." His friend's voice was grave, and he didn't miss the fact hat he called him by his name, "I can't say you what to do. But in your place, I would start with a bath. A shave and some new clothes. I would take your staff, and look like the airbender that you are. Show the world you are not gone, and that these people are making the wrong choice by supporting Azula."

Yeah… Letting a hand pass over his scalp, Aang felt the hair of at least two weeks' prick over his fingers. As his hand glided over his cheeks, he could sense the soft hairs growing on them… Spirits, he had let himself go… If Katara could see him now… She would shake her head, muttering under her breath about what an idiot he was, and give him the stuff to clean himself up…

And maybe he should…

"I… I don't have anything like airbender clothes…" He whispered, feeling stupid that that was the thing that worried him. But Sokka was right, if he wanted to walk up to the walls and demand their surrender, he needed to look like the Avatar… And these people would not be impressed by Kuzon the merchant son. No… They needed to see who was in front of their gates…

"Iroh took the liberty of having some of the seamstresses of the Royal Family make some tunics for you. I have them in my bag. Come on, let's get you cleaned up." His friend took him by the shoulder and turned him, gently, in the direction of the camp. As they began to walk, Aang felt that Sokka let his weight rest upon him.

"How is the leg?" He asked, feeling guilty that he had not asked before.

"Alright, I can do most of the things I want. But it does hurt… When we get Katara out of there, she could take a look." Sokka spoke softly, but Aang heard the unspoken words that should have come after that sentence…

If she can.

Shaking his head, trying to get the voice out of his mind, the airbender began to think. He had been there during the negotiation between Piandao and the governor of the town. Something in the man's face had made him think of someone… He couldn't guess who, and he was probably mistaken, but something… Something had made him think of a mean bully. But that was surely his imagination once more.

If he was to talk to these people as the Avatar… He should probably try and keep his feelings in check. He shouldn't let them see the worry, the horrible, horrible thoughts that were haunting his nights. He should try and be the person Gyatso would have wanted him to be… Calm, collected and, most of all, just and kind.

But at the same time, he knew that those things were thrown in the wind when it came to Katara. He couldn't be calm knowing she was behind those walls… Suffering spirits knew what…

They approached the trees, and Aang saw that the leaves were slowly colouring into a golden brown… Looking up, he saw that the rain was still holding out, the monsoon season of this part of the Fire Nation being quite late… Luckily for them. He couldn't imagine what it would do to all those firebenders, sitting in the rain around a town.

In the masses of red tents, all build up between trees and in any open space of the forest, Aang suddenly saw a few green and blue ones being thrown up. Sokka was pulling him towards that part of the camp, clearly intending to get him there. As they approached, Aang saw that there was a space, several yards wide, between the Fire Nation camp and the new camp. Then, the first people came into view.

The men walking the new camp were all busy putting up tents, gathering fire wood… And watching the soldiers in the hated Fire Nation colours, who were in turn watching them with unhidden curiosity.

The airbender knew that most of the soldiers under Zuko's command were people who had never left the Fire Nation, and who had never seen the people their regime had called Water Savages and Earth Eaters… And, he knew, in a short while, they could add Air Degenerate to the list of new things they had seen today…

Sokka and he arrived in the middle of the new camp, most men not even looking surprised to see him. It felt… good. Not to be looked at with fear and contempt… To feel normal

"Here." His friend grabbed a bag that stood on a crate, and threw it towards him. Catching it, without even having to bend the air underneath it, Aang opened it and saw that inside, there was a tunic… in a soft saffron colour, with patterns of orange and red weaved into the fabric. Looking at his friend, Aang doubted Sokka realized what those patterns meant…

"Where did Iroh get these ideas?" He asked, but he already knew. The old prince spoke the Air Nomads language, and the scrolls that the Fire Nation had stolen from the temple would surely have been read by the general to train his mastery of the language…

"Didn't say. Just that it was the right thing." Sokka frowned, looking worried, "Why? Did we mess up?"

Aang shook his head, knowing that the Water Tribe warrior didn't need to know about his mixed feelings. The patterns, soft twirls and long waves that clearly represented the wind, had been worn on the shawls of the monks in the councils of the temples… And this particular pattern, on a long tunic… It had been the right of the oldest monk in the temple… The one that was the most experiences… the wisest

"Thanks." He muttered quietly, and Sokka patted his shoulder before walking to a group of men standing next to one of the tents. Aang, through tear-filled eyes, could see that in the group, Bato was waving towards him. Putting up his hand, he acknowledged the gesture.

There was also a razor in the bag, and Aang took it, walking to the crate that stood there. A small bowl of water stood on it, and he dipped the blade into it, sighing. He knew what needed to be done… But spirits, it would be so much easier to just go back in time, forget his fight with Ozai… And stop Katara from leaving Zuko in the capital. If she had just stayed…

As he froze the water with a gesture of his left hand, his right one gripped the razor tightly, and he began to shave off the hairs on his head. As he saw them fall from his skin, he looked into the reflection the ice showed him. He looked years older… And the grey eyes that stared back at him where hard as stone… Spirits…

His tattoo became far more visible by each pass of the razor, and after a few minutes, Aang began to recognize himself once more. He lowered the blade, letting it slide over his cheeks.

A little lower, and all this pain and suffering are at an end…

Startled by the thought, he quickly finished shaving and threw the razor on the crate, waving his hand to liquify the water once more. Aang felt his heart beat rapidly… Spirits, that had been too far. Way too far.

"Well, Twinkletoes is feeling presentable." Toph's voice broke through the soft background noises Aang had been hearing, and looking up, he saw the blind girl, accompanied by Suki, stand with Sokka. They had also taken Appa with them, who growled softly towards him. Feeling his heartbeat calm down slowly, he smiled towards his bison, who looked at him with a concerned gaze. Hopefully, Toph had not felt his sudden change of mood…

"Also looks a lot more presentable." Sokka muttered next to the blind girl, and Aang sighed, taking the tunic from the bag. There were concerned voices coming from the Fire Nation camp, just next to this mass of tents, and Aang thought he heard the words the Air Monster…

Were they talking about Appa? Or… him?

Not looking over his shoulder to the people talking, he pulled the red and black tunic up, feeling the scar on his back stretch as his arms went up. He could feel eyes on him, and the voices from the Fire Nation soldiers became far more alarmed as they realized who they were watching change. Not even bothering to hide his tattoos, Aang shook the tunic, seeing it was made in the same manner as the ones he had worn in the Earth Kingdom and after the Invasion. A half tunic, one revealing his left arm, shoulder and chest, clearly showing the tattoos on his arm and neck.

A chittering sound came from Appa's saddle, and he saw how Momo flew up to sit on one of the bison's horns. The airbender couldn't help but feel a little better, seeing that his friends and companions were all here… Except Zuko, who was still at Fire Fountain.

And not to forget your savage.

Spirits… What were these thoughts?

"I took the liberty of searching Appa's saddle." Suki's voice broke his thoughts, and look up as he pulled the tunic on, he saw she approached with his staff, "It was still where we left it. Katara took it with us from Ember Island… She said you would need it to get back from wherever you were."

Nodding shortly, he took the pale blue wood. He knew that whoever looked at him now, would know who… And what… he was. There was no hiding anymore. Appa had been here… And his bison knew how much Katara meant to him… And he would not have left her. So, she had to be here. She had to.

Turning around, he knew what he had to do. That town… That town had been Kuzon's home, a hundred years ago. A few months ago, he had met people living there, good people… He had tried to make them happy. And now? Now, he would have to make them afraid. Afraid of him.

But if that meant he would have Katara, safe and sound? Great Spirits, he would make the world afraid of him if that gave her back, safe… He would not care. He knew that all Air Nomads would frown upon the course of action he was taking, because it danced quite precariously over the fine line of violence and pacifism.

But to free her, Aang would sacrifice anything.

"What do you think your doing?" A new voice, alarmed, broke through. Turning around, he saw that Piandao, scabbard in hand, was walking towards him with great strides, clearly not amused. Behind him, the airbender saw Hakoda frown, before the ice blue eyes saw the people behind him.

"That town needs to surrender." Aang answered, as the swordsman stopped in front of him. The Chief walked past them, and he heard the soft whispered as the man reached his son.

"It does. But did you forget why Prince Iroh suggested you keep away from any fighting?" Piandao asked, still sounding as if he was doing his best to control his emotions.

"I didn't. But she is there. She has to be." The airbender took a step to the left. His arm was grasped by the sword master, and he could hear the collective gasp of the Fire Nation soldiers watching it from their own camp.

"Avatar Aang, I don't command you, that I know. But I would strongly advise you keep out of sight of those walls. If you love your wife, don't give them any reason to harm her." Piandao whispered.

"Excuse me?" He heard Hakoda's voice come from behind him, but Aang ignored it.

"What would you do? Sit here, doing nothing?" Aang whispered back at the older master, whose ember eyes softened at those words.

"I know… But if you try to get them to surrender, and they don't… You will invite calamity upon her. And if they don't, and taunt you… Do you have any control of the Avatar State?" Piandao asked with concern in the kind voice.

How much did the master know about the Avatar State? Sokka had told him that Piandao was a member of the Order of the White Lotus, and that meant he probably knew far more than Aang about being the Avatar… But this wasn't about that. This was about finding Katara. Avatar be damned, now he was just Aang.

"I know that the Avatars of old have some say in if I get access to it." He answered thinly. Aang couldn't help it, but he still felt mad about how the Avatars had discussed his fate and that of the world while he had been fighting Ozai.

"Let's hope then that they can provide some wisdom… in case things go south." The sword master released his arm, and Aang began to walk.

Wisdom. When had the Avatars ever done something for him? Even now, during the sleepless nights, Aang had begged for help. He had begged for anything that could show him where Katara was… But no Avatar had answered.

No, he knew Sokka was right. No one was going to help them get her back. Only they could do that. And that was exactly what he was going to do. So, he marched towards the town.

"I have good… and bad news." Kuruk spoke, clasping the bone spear in his hand.

"Let's hear the bad first." Roku sighed, knowing that it was probably the more important piece of information.

"I searched the Fog of Lost Souls, for one very specific person." Kuruk began, and the old firebending Avatar could feel a chill go through his body, "If Szeto is behind the things that are happening in the physical world, that would mean he was corrupted. Don't get me wrong, we all agree he was a piece of shit, even alive. But he was still an Avatar, mostly working to better the world."

That made sense. Szeto had been Avatar during a very hard time in history, one where the Fire Nation had nearly destroyed itself from within. It had been Szeto who had stopped that from happening, by becoming the de facto ruler, helping the Fire Lord become a real politic figure, not just a symbol.

"So, I went to the Fog, knowing that there is one spirit in there who would like to keep the Fire Nation just as he had made it." Kuruk continued.

"Sozin." Roku sighed.

"Yes. And he isn't in there anymore."

When his old friend, and murderer, had died, the Avatars had all condemned him to be erased from the Spirit World, but Roku had argued to at least let him exist… Even if it was in the Fog of Lost Souls.

"So… You think Sozin poisoned Szeto's mind?" He asked.

"I do." Kuruk nodded, "It would make sense. We know that slimy bastard liked the Fire Nation more than any other nation, and Sozin... Well, I don't need to explain that he loved his nation. In his own, twisted way."

"And the good news?" Agni, this was bad. But at least, they would know what to expect. If there was someone who knew Sozin, it was him.

"I seem to be able to contact the young airbender. Or at least, access his mind." Kuruk looked proudly around, "He… ehm… well, I believe Szeto's spirits are gnawing at the edges of his mind. I didn't get the whole picture, but he seems to believe that the waterbender girl is in danger..."

"She is missing that we do know. And we couldn't find her either." Roku pointed out.

"Exactly. If what I saw if true, young Aang believes that the princess has the Master Katara. How could she find her, while we couldn't?" Kuruk asked, and to be honest… he made sense.

"Szeto knows that the only way to make the whole Fire Nation unite behind Azula, is by making them afraid of one person. A person who is the rock on which Zuko is trying to build his rule. And he knows, as we do all, that young Aang would do anything for the girl. So… What better way? Szeto, and perhaps Sozin, make the Avatar fear for his love… And by doing so, unites the nation behind the candidate they favour."

It made sense… Now… Now, Aang had to be smart. And Roku hoped that the young airbender would not do something incredibly stupid…

Answers:

Guest : Yeah, the guy is clearly having doubts, and is not a bad person. Just one who is surrounded by bad people.

Shade5280 : Thank you! It is a nice compliment when people can't get away from your stories!

McChartney: The horrible thing is that they both know, but they don't know that the other knows. So, Aang is marching to the town to ask for her, while she is inside, hiding the fact that she is there! Next chapter may be On Ji's POV, because I think it would be a good idea mwhaha.