Ponyboy holds the funnel cake over my head, just out of arms reach. I try to jump to make a grab for it, but he quickly pulls it higher with a laugh.

"If you don't give me that funnel cake," I say with a low voice.

"I'll give it," he says, "but you gotta promise to go on the Ferris wheel."

"Pony, that's a death trap!"

"And so is funnel cake, clogs all your arteries." He jokes, smiling as he watches me cross my arms over my chest.

"You eat chocolate cake for breakfast!" I say and his smile widens.

"It ain't deep fried," he argues, and I push out my lip to plead. "Just say you'll go on the Ferris wheel, and you can have your deep-fried artery blocker."

"Pleeeease," I beg one more time, knowing that I have most likely lost the battle. "I'll do anything you want," I say, wiggling my eyebrows suggestively.

Ponyboy lifts his eyebrows back and leans in a little closer to press a kiss to my lips, "Great, I'll go buy two tickets for the Ferris wheel."

My mouth drops as he hands me the funnel cake, before disappearing into the crowd to find the ticket booth. I sit on a bench and pick at my funnel cake, wiping up the chocolate sauce with small bites of the cake. The sun feels good on my skin, and I close my eyes enjoying the warmth. The summer rains have caused the sun to feel a little less harsh and a lot more welcoming with the start of the school year on the horizon.

I open my eyes when Ponyboy takes his place next to me on the bench, taking a moment to flash the two tickets to the Ferris wheel. I roll my eyes, but hand him the funnel cake anyways, watching him take a few bites before I pick at it some more. We sit in silence together, and watch the other couples and families enjoy the rides, games, and food. I have loved the carnival ever since my father brought me here when I was five. I never think about him often but couldn't help but think of him whenever I'm back here again. I could never admit it to anyone, but there were days I missed him and today was one of those days.

"You think the carnival will still be in town when we have kids?" I ask and Ponyboy chokes on the funnel cake a bit. I realize how my question sounds and blush slightly, flicking at him to save myself. "I didn't mean we" I say with a shake of my head, "I just mean do you think it will still be here?"

Ponyboy thinks about it for a moment before saying, "Yeah, but what's it matter? We'll be long out of Tulsa by then."

This thought catches me off guard and I start picturing other places. Would they have the same comforting feel as Tulsa? Would they have carnivals and livestock fairs for my children to play in and enjoy? "I think that makes me a little sad," I finally say and Ponyboy nods.

"Yeah, I know." He says before patting my leg and taking the empty funnel cake plate from my lap to throw in the trash. "You ready for some high in the sky fun?"

"No," I say with a laugh, "but I'll do it for you."

Ponyboy takes my hand we walk together to the ferris wheel. We stop a few times, watching some of our friends try their luck at the different games, laughing at the ones who miss the milk bottles and applauding the ones who successfully knock them over. Ponyboy points at a soft, brown teddy bear hanging from one of the prize sections and agrees to try his luck in winning it. He throws the baseball once, twice, and finally knocks the bottles on the third. I clap and Ponyboy hands me the brown teddy bear, a silky yellow ribbon tied around its neck.

"I love him," I tell him, and he smiles.

"I love you," he says before kissing the top of my head.

As we wait in line for the Ferris wheel, Ponyboy talks about the upcoming school year. His excitement for his last year of track, the fact that he might be scouted by some of his top choices for college, "Darry says I'll need a full ride, or something close too it so I can go a good school."

"Any school would be lucky to have you," I say with a grin, "you're going to be a big famous author one day and I'll be stocking your books on the shelves of Harv's bookstore."

He chuckles and nudges me to move forward with the line, "Nellie, you're selling yourself too short. You're a wiz at reading and writing, probably as good as I am."

"Yeah, but I'm not getting a full ride for being the fastest bookstore stocker," I tease and he rolls his eyes.

"Maybe not," he agrees, "but you're smarter than most people. Any school would be lucky to have you too."

I open my mouth to respond, but close it quickly when I realize I am at a loss for words. I still have not told Pony the concerns Two-Bit and I have about our mother. If mama is sick, I want to tell him, then school would be out of the question. Two-Bit and I had decided that a few nights before. All the things that we would give up if our fears ended up being true. I would give up my dream of going to school out of state. Two-Bit would give up his carefree lifestyle and find a real job to support mama. We would sell anything of ours that was worth some money, to ensure that mama's medical bills were covered. As long as the three of us stood together, like we always have, than we could make it through and mama will live.

"What are you thinking about?" Ponyboy asks as he helps me onto the Ferris wheel cart.

"How much I hate you for making me do this," I lie, quick on my feet so Ponyboy isn't concerned. He chuckles and slides in next to me, pulling down the lap bar for the ride operator to lock us in.

"It ain't that bad, Nell." He assures me before taking my hand in his, "I won't even rock it like Sodapop used to do to me when we were kids."

"If you did that and we didn't fall out," I say pointedly, "I would kill you the second my feet touched the ground."

As the ride starts to spin and our cart starts to lift into the sky, I find myself holding my breath and wishing desperately that I could close my eyes, but we lift higher and higher into the sky, the view doesn't seem so scary after all. From the top of the Ferris wheel, the people we were just watching look like ants and the sky is a beautiful mixture of orange and purple. I feel my mouth slightly drop and look at Ponyboy with a quick smile.

"Has it always been like this?" I ask and Ponyboy nods, leaning over to press a kiss to my cheek and then my jaw, and finally against my lips.

"I'd stay here forever with you," he tells me, as I cup his face with my hands to pull him in closer.


"Two-Bit get a truck?" Pony asks as we pull up to my house. I start to shrink down in the passenger seat, hoping to disappear completely.

"It's my Uncle Butch," I groan, "he has a great way of killing good days."

"I'm sorry we can't stay out longer," Pony says comfortingly, "but we both got work in the morning."

"Oh, I know," I sigh, shaking my head and leaning over to press a kiss to his lips. "I don't even know why he's here anyways."

"I thought he was just visiting," Ponyboy says, and I shrug.

"Uncle Butch doesn't visit unless he has a motive," I finally say and Ponyboy looks at me questionably.

"You sure you don't want to talk about something, Nellie?" Ponyboy says, and I can hear the slight concern in his voice.

I pause for a moment and feel the words beginning to bubble up, ready for me to spill every fear and concern that has been stewing inside me for the past few days. It would be easy, telling Ponyboy, but what would he think? Would he even really understand why I felt like I was spiraling out of control?

"Nothing at all," I tell him, "Call me tomorrow?"

"Always do," he says as I jump out of the truck and hurry up the steps before the summer rain starts to fall once more.

Standing in the foyer, I listen carefully to any voices in the kitchen and sigh in relief when I realize that no one seems to be awake anymore. I use this as my chance to hurry up the stairs to avoid any awkward conversation with my uncle. Quietly opening my bedroom door, I gasp when I find my aunt Louise sitting at my vanity brushing her hair.

"What are you doing in her?" I ask, clutching my chest like I'm about to keel over.

"Your uncle kicked me out of my room," she sighs, "I thought the old man was staying in a hotel."

I laugh and crawl into my bed, pulling the covers up close to my chin, "You're going to have to sleep on the floor."

"You're such a brat," she teases before sitting down next to me on the bed and brushing my hair back. "Did you have fun with Pony?

"I did," I say, but I can't keep the next words from tumbling out of my mouth, "is Uncle Butch here because somethings wrong?"

"Why would you say that?" My aunt asks without missing a beat. I can't help but notice how her eyes break from mine and how the poster above my bed is suddenly so interesting to her.

"I've only ever seen Uncle Butch during hard times," I shrug, "like when my dad left or when grandma died."

"Uncle Butch just wanted to come out for a visit, no harm in that," she presses a kiss to my forehead before scooting me over to and crawling into bed with me.

"You wouldn't lie to me, right aunt Lou?" I ask as she turns out the light, letting the darkness settle over us like a heavy blanket.

"No," she finally says, and I try not to think so much about the quiver in her voice.