I Wanna Know by NOTD, Bea Miller
Day 1She was laying in the bed alone again. It happens more often now. She had seen the messages every now and then pop up on his phone. He never showed excitement or interest in getting the messages and that was relief enough for her. But over all she knew he was cheating on her.He had been for the past month or so and she really didn't know how to feel about it. He had talked to her about the image the commission wanted him to have. The heart throb playboy image. It was just for the media though. And that's why she didn't keep up with hero news or gossip. She didn't want to see who her boyfriend was supposedly with.But now it was different. He came home later and left earlier and would make things short. There was a distance that was growing. But she ignored it till now.They'd been dating for 4 years now and she loved him. She loved how he sucked at cooking but still seems to want to try. She loved his stupid puns and how he made her laugh. He loves his smile.His shirt was laying loose on her back and she had to wonder it the other women made him happier.Day 2She worked an office job that she was unappreciated at but the highlight of her life was coming home to him. Only he wasn't home even though it was past patrol hours. She could only assume that she was with her. Whoever she was.Did she have something that she didn't. Could she help him relieve his stressful days in a way she couldn't? Did her love this other person or was it something else?She doesn't see the shadow in the hall watching her cry on the sheets. Wondering what was wrong with her and what was missing that she could fix.Day 3Maybe she wasn't being rational about all of this. He was a pro hero. The number 2 hero and he was under the commission who used and abused him. But she couldn't talk to anyone about it. Not friends and she wasn't close with family. No one could know about them.She didn't even have her mail go to the apartment but to a PO down the way.None of this ever bothered her though because she loves him and she could always talk to him. A communication line had been cut though. Her love still felt pure on her end but.. but what about his?Day 4"Keigo?" She wraps her arms around him when he comes into the bed. He was facing her. He always did. It was easier to have his wings away.She thought he was going to dismiss her like he had been recently but instead he returned the embrace."Ali, I love you." She heard the words and she felt pain behind them.But she doesn't want to acknowledge that. She just wants to be with him so she pulls him into a kiss. "I love you too." She whispers against his lips.Their lips never end up leaving one another. He rolls them so that he is onto her his forearms giving them just enough space to breathe.Her eyes never leave his even as he moves one arm to pull down her underwear. And his pants only just enough. It was happening again. She knew this and as she looked into his eyes and saw her reflection. She watered eyes as a single tear rolled down her cheek.The only comfort in the act was that his eyes were also glossed over with unscheduled tears.Their movements were minimal. Just enough for him to penetrate her and grant her just enough pleasure. Both of them looking into eachothers eyes the whole time during the mediocre act led by guilt and grief. Both of them longing for what they once had.There was no moaning, just heavy breathing and a hitch in his breath when he released inside her. And then it was done. He'd pull his pant back up close his eyes while laying down.And she. She'd go to the bathroom and clean up. She'd never finish herself off. Too embarrassed and ashamed. And maybe that's what he felt.Embarrassed and ashamed to be touching, to getting her off after having done it with others. But still selfish enough to finish himself.And then she'd lay back in the bed. But this time she'd face away from him. Not wanted to look him in the face.He wrapped his arms around her and started to spoon her. And it hurt. It hurt because she still loved him and the memories of the good times still filled here.But these weren't good memories. She left the tears falling and she tried to control her breathing, not wanting to let him notice.And as she started to drift to sleep that when she started to feel his own teardrops along her neck.
