Rule courtesy of the Budgie Admiral. Not bad for a rookie, mate! ;)
9713: While the gesture is apprciated, gifting Kaga a freezer is banned effective immediately. Unforeseen complications occurred.
Zuikaku, fleet carrier of the 5th Carrier Division of the JMSDF, was merrily humming a catchy tune when she entered the mess hall. It was early in the morning, so few others were awake just yet, and that left the mess hall practically deserted. Which was nice, because that meant she'd have first grabs on some of the bretzen that the German shipgirls, Graf Zeppelin in particular, had brought with them.
She was about to grab a few from the absolutely massive pile of bakeware when she felt a cold hand land on her shoulder. Her humming stopped dead in its tracks as she slowly turned around and came face to face with a visibly sleepy and very angry Akagi.
"Was it your idea?" She demanded with a creepy half-smile. While Shoukaku-nee was still the master of half-smiles, she had to admit that Akagi had proven a good apprentice to Zuikaku's sister.
"What are we talking about here?"
"Please don't deny it, I know you know of the freezer. Did you have a good laugh?"
"What freezer?"
"The one your sister gifted to Kaga yesterday."
Oh. That freezer.
"Well… In my defence, it was Shoukaku's idea and she did it with no malice involved. Also, it's a minibar, not a freezer, for cool drinks and snacks. She said that Kaga might like cool drinks, because of, y'know, her temperature." That was the truth. But then again, no need to tell Akagi how funny Zuikaku thought it had been. "And anyways, what's with it that got you so worked up?"
"What's with it? Oh, I'm going to show you what's with it. Come with me." And with that, Zuikaku, bretzen in hand, was dragged down the hallway to the carrier dorms, leaving behind a couple of thoroughly puzzled spectators.
v
Soon, both carriers were standing in the 1st Division's room, staring in disbelief at the freezer minibar. Not that anything was wrong with the minibar in particular. It actually was quite a nice one, blue for obvious reasons, and styled to imitate the look of old 60s era freezers, with rounded corners and chrome attachments.
What left both carriers gaping in disbelief was Kaga, who had somehow managed to huddle her entire large frame into the tiny minibar. The 1st Division's pride was looking fairly content with the situation (as far as her stoic face could tell of any emotion) and was in no hurry to budge.
"That's with it.", said Akagi. "Is that supposed to be funny?"
Zuikaku for her part, was too busy cackling like a schoolgirl. Admittedly, it was a hilarious sight. Obviously, she could not possibly miss the opportunity to take a picture for later use. It could prove handy against the old grunt in the future, y'know?
"What are you- HEY! Stop!" Akagi exclaimed, hands frantically trying to block the camera or get a grip on Zuikaku's smartphone, to no avail. Kaga, uncharacteristically for her, did not seem to care much.
Her friend though did. "Are you done already?" she asked the still giggling Zuikaku. "Yeah. Yeah, I think I am. That was hilarious.", she responded, earning a pissed look from Akagi. "So what now?"
Instead of an answer, Akagi reached for the minibar and tugged on Kaga's clothes. To Zuikaku's shock, the carrier started hissing like a cat, a furious expression on her features and eyes gleaming like, well, a cat's eyes in the dark. Okay, that hadn't been part of the plan.
"Uhh, Akagi... How long has she been in there?" Zuikaku asked, now slightly worried.
"How long? She got in the second she had unpacked it and plugged in the power cable! I tried coaxing her out the entire goddamn night! I got zero sleep, and neither did she as far as I can tell. If you wanted to see me desperate, well congratulations, you got me desperate. I'll do anything you say, just get her out of the freezer!"
"Minibar."
"WHATEVER! Get her back to normal now!"
Zuikaku, for her part, did not answer immediately. She took her time, looked to Kaga in the minibar, then back to Akagi's desperate face. On second thought, how had she missed the red rim around the carrier's eyes before? She could've sworn the dried tears hadn't been there before.
As much as she disliked the stoic shipgirl, Kaga's condition seemed to be quite serious. Akagi certainly was not lying, she for her part held no grudge against Zuikaku. She had no reason to prank her. Kaga might, but Akagi would not go along with that.
So this was very much real, and worrying. She had to find a way to get Kaga out of the freezer, sorry, minibar, preferably before the admiral started wondering where his second-best carrier had gone!
v
An hour later, Zuikaku's arms were festooned with scratches and bite marks, Akagi was crying in a corner, and Kaga was still in the freezer. She threw a furious glare at Zuikaku and then settled back into the minibar, resisting any and all attempts to move her with fierce use of force.
"What do we do now?" Asked Akagi, her voice high pitched with worry. Zuikaku, out of breath and in pain from the claw marks on her arms, simply slumped down on Kaga's bed. "I'm out.", she sighed. "Although… I might know someone who can help… But you won't like it."
v
Five minutes later, a knock sounded on the door, and Zuikaku opened it to reveal both Yuubaris, wearing gas masks and dragging a steel pressure bottle along on the floor behind them that was covered top to bottom in a veritable maze of warning and hazard signs. Zuikaku was positive that at least one of the signs explicitly warned from dragging the bottle along the floor.
"Hi, where's our subject?" chirped the first Yuubari, eyes alight with anticipation. Akagi said "Eep.".
"Found her!" proclaimed the second one, hunched over the minibar and curiously eying it's content. Kaga stared back, unfazed.
"So? Can you get her out?" asked Zuikaku. Without taking her eyes off the minibar, the second Yuubari answered "Yeah, sure, we can get her out…" At Akagi's sigh of relief, she continued "But you'll have to leave the room."
v
Another fifteen minutes later, Akagi was furiously pacing up and down the hallway in front of her room's door, the door that the Yuubaris had locked from the inside. Zuikaku was leaned against the wall, shooting an annoyed gaze at the pacing carrier.
"What?" Akagi shouted, nervous as a trainee surgeon at his first day.
"Relax, she'll be fine. Your pacing is not going to accelerate things."
"You did tell the Yuubaris not to harm her, did you?"
In favour of a response, Zuikaku was now starting to pale. Just as Akagi was about to burst into tears again, the door swung open and a panting Yuubari announced that Kaga was now knocked out but she promised she'd wake up soon, and gestured them inside.
Indeed, Kaga was seemingly unharmed, sprawled out on her bed, eyes tightly shut. One of the Yuubaris placed a needle in her arm, and the carrier's eyes jolted open, shot from side to side as she took in her surroundings, and then she slowly sat up just enough for Akagi to tackle-hug her back down.
"Akagi? I think I don't remember a few things. I remember it was evening when Shoukaku brought us the freezer…"
Akagi sobbed happily.
"I also remember a turkey..."
Zuikaku screamed in rage and kicked the freezer to shreds. So long, minibar.
Kaga smirked.
