Chapter 11: Sworn to Protect

I wish I knew another way

To save you

But I've tried so many ways

To save you

I can only say, I love you, I love you

Azalea was soaked by the time she arrived at the palace. She kicked the doors open, not caring that the few guests that remained all looked at her and were probably wondering why the guest of honor was soaked with messy wet hair and no shoes.

She didn't say a word as she conjured up enough magic energy to toss someone into the next border. The blast was fired at Rhysand but his cousin stepped in. No matter, by the time they processed what had happened she was already in front of the High Lord.

Azalea didn't like violence, she had already seen enough of it as a medic. But tonight, tonight she wasn't going to be satisfied unless she evoked nightmares in these people.

Her usually delicate hand was curled into a punch and soon made contact with Rhysand's face, and she could feel the man's nose break on impact. She didn't let him fall and held him by the back of the head before kneeling in the stomach hard enough to make him throw up blood and fall unconscious, then she tossed him away. There were others coming and she would let them all get their fill.

Cassian was the second to lounge at her, all she had to do was think of what Nesta had told her, of the things this man had done to her new sister, and to her brother. Azalea was quick to avoid his strikes, she let her claws out and sunk them into his arms, pulling and twisting hard enough to break the bone and have it pop out of the skin. Then she did the same with the other.

Was he screaming? She couldn't hear, her fast heartbeat and blood rushing were all her ears registered. A table beside her had candles and a tray of rum glasses. She dumped the alcohol on the injured illyrian before her, especially on his wings before setting him ablaze.

"Burn, you brute!" She screamed at him before being silenced by shadows wrapping around her neck. 'Ah the torturer, I been wanting to get at you.'

She betrayed nothing as she bended the blood inside Azriel, had it gushing out of his eyes, nose, and mouth before tearing the shadows to shreds of smoke and tackling him. Azalea's clawed hands sunk into his neck and she choked him.

"What's the problem, pretty boy? Not into this?!"

A woman was trying to pull her off him, she knew who it was from her pink nails and rose perfume. She waited until Azriel was out cold to relent, the moment Elain got her off him she grabbed the middle Acheron sister by the hair and began banging her head against the table.

"Don't. You. Ever. Bother. Lucien. AGAIN!"

Once, twice, thrice, every hit was harsher than the last, and she saw red staining the once white tablecloth, it was dripping off the edge by the time the girl went limp.

Azalea tossed her away when the High Lady of Night rushed towards her, daring to show Illiryan wings as if that did anything other than piss her off more.

Azalea used her power to take control of her blood. She was harder to manage than Azriel, but the medic had other plans for the woman who let Daphne and thousands of others die at her altar.

"C'mon, cursebringer! Fucking end me! Do it! You nearly succeeded once, have you gone that cold after he made you his doll?!"

'That's it get mad at me bitch!' She taunted internally as she released her from the blood magic. The moment Feyre lounged at her she sunk her teeth onto her neck, narrowly missing the vital points.

Blood spilled onto the floor, while she bit harder and buried her hands on Feyre's wings before beginning to pull as hard as she could. Azalea remembered her brother's lessons, he made a point to remind her not to lose herself to anger. But her brother wasn't her right now. Was he?

Her hands were turned to brown furry lion paws and they were perfect for tearing through black wings. She didn't hesitate to rip the appendages apart. Feyre was now out cold, but Azalea still stepped on her throat just in case. Leaving herself vulnerable in front of this woman was like asking for a knife to the back.

Amren was nowhere to be seen until she felt a presence near, trying to pull her away from Feyre, Azalea managed to avoid her long enough to get a knife from the table and put it to good use. The moment she saw Amren materialize she stabbed her in the shoulder and arms. 'Try to do magic on me again, crone!'

Amren punched her but the hit didn't hurt her at all, she used her other hand to conjure up her power but Azalea held her hands and crushed the bones and muscle with one squeeze before running up the knife from wrist to shoulder as she once had cut herself too.

Rhysand had woken up and quickly tried to use his magic on her mind, she could tell from his baffled expression that he couldn't fathom how she was immune to such a thing.

One last slash of the knife through Amren's face was enough to take her down before she kicked her head as she lay on the floor. Azalea walked to where Rhysand tried to stand, she picked him up by the hair so they were eye to eye. "Trying to get in my mind? Go on, do it! Do it!" She grabbed his hand and pressed two fingers to her forehead. "What's wrong, you shitlord? Can't do it? Oh, I know why!

It's because I don't fear you, on the contrary. Your very existence disgusts me!"

She broke his fingers and then slammed him against the floor. Azalea took one wing on each hand and placed her foot upon his back, it was now a brown lion's paw. The claws sunk into the spot as she began to pull with force.

The skin came apart, then the muscles, then the tendons, and finally the bones as she had clipped the wings off the High Lord.

That's when she was stopped. Before she could do anything else she felt Nemesis wrap his arms around her. "Enough. For now, that's enough." He whispered in her ear as he let her shift back to normal.

Azalea could now hear the horrified screams and whispers around her. She began panicking when Tarquin walked over to where they were.

Surprisingly the High Lord wasn't mad but rather worried. He cupped her chin gently, looking into her eyes. "What happened?"

"They got Tamlin to relapse!"

"What?!"

"He was going to drown himself in the pool of starlight. We barely got him out in time, he's still injured, and...And it was him!"

Rhysand was still conscious trying to stand. "I'm not responsible for what your failure of a brother does."

She would've lounged back at him again if Nemesis's grip wasn't hard enough to bruise. She knew he meant well because killing the bastard would bring more harm than good. Still, she wanted him dead this instant.

"Did he use magic?" Cedric asked, getting out of his hiding place and coming to assist her.

"Yes, check my hands."

There was still the purple glittery trace of Night Court magic in her blood-covered hands. Cedric walked over to the feeble Rhysand took a sample of magic from him and compared it to Azalea's, it was a match.

"She's telling the truth. Did Tamlin have puncture wounds?"

"On the shoulder, it also looked like he got slapped too." She confessed in between breaths.

Cedric nodded and looked to Tarquin. "Her majesty is telling the truth. One can induce a suicidal subject over the edge with daemati magic. I can testify to seeing Tamlin speaking to the inner circle before leaving."

"I can too," Nemesis responded.

"Ridiculous, you're going to believe those madmen and that hysteric beast over me?!" Rhysand muttered as he finally stood up.

"Listen to me you son of bitch, you already took three of my siblings I am NEVER letting you take Tamlin. Do you hear me?! You will never get the satisfaction of killing my brother! He has others willing to fight for him now and I am one of them! Leave him alone or next time, I'll tear out your nails one by one before making you swallow them!"

Her voice was so strained one could tell she was crying. It gave credence to what had happened, not that Tarquin had needed it.

He pressed a kiss to her forehead. Tarquin walked over to where Rhysand was, handing him seven blood rubies. "I won't tolerate your treatment of my brother-in-law any more. This time you're all banned for life. I mean it."

"All of this for a terminal case! He already tried to kill himself once! Is it really our fault he tried again?!"

Tarquin held Rhysand's chin, jerking him upward to look him in the eye. "I've only had one full-on conversation with that man before this happened but I could tell he'd made such progress that perhaps tragedy wouldn't repeat itself.

I am of the belief that without your intervention this wouldn't have happened. This is merely me protecting my family, which includes Tamlin.

You wronged me once before and I forgave you. I won't do it again, not when you hurt someone dear to me on what was supposed to be a happy occasion for my court. You have a minute to winnow out of here with your guests or I will call the guards!"

He didn't protest, didn't fight or maybe he just couldn't but Rhysand for once did as asked.

Only then did Azalea black out.

The clock struck 12 when Tamlin woke up. He was laid on two big fluffy pillows with his head high, and wore nothing but his pajama pants Ophelia and Tamarand were pacing around the room while Asteria spoke to an unknown woman. She was blue with purple hair and big ears.

"Oh, he's coming to. Your majesty, good to see ya awake. My name's Lunara and I have been tending to you this evening. Can you speak?"

"Yes. I think so."

"Perfect! Any stomach pain? Strain? Headache?"

"My shoulder but, you know about that, right?"

"Indeed I do. Don't worry it's been patched up. You seem to be stable and from what I've seen you have no fluid in your lungs anymore. You need to stay hydrated and warm. Otherwise, I say we're done here."

"Thank you, doctor..." He looked at Asteria. "What happened?"

"After they found you and brought you here Azalea went on a rampage and fought the inner circle. They're all banned from Summer for what they did to you." She informed him, gently moving the hair out of his face.

"She did what?! But...what of her image, what if Tarquin-"

"It's fine, dear. He was worried for you as well. In terms of image, some people might disagree but every Summer citizen was quite pleased to see their Lady rough up the cause of their strife. She'll be okay."

He nodded. The pain was returning so he laid back down.

"If it makes you feel better sire, I highly doubt any of the inner circle will bother you or your Court again," Lunara told him with a smile so sweet yet so devious he instantly knew the woman carried a hate for them just as bitter as his. "There were no casualties, they can't declare war and they won't risk angering your sister again."

He chuckled "Those are indeed good news. Thank you."

"I shall take my leave now, Grim has probably been talking Lucien's ear off for an hour. Time to fetch my husband."

"If it's not too much to ask Mrs. LeClair, could you both stay overnight? We don't want to risk anything and Azalea won't be coming back for a while. I'll provide you with anything you need."

"Of course, my lord. I'll be happy to stay."

The medic left to speak with her husband leaving him with his mothers and brother. They all hugged him as tightly as they could without causing him pain.

"I'm sorry."

"Hush! I better not hear any apologies! Not for this!"

"Asy is right! We almost lost you baby we were so worried. Oh gods, we had to winnow here as soon as Azalea told us."

"I think Lucien passed out for a while before I did. We were happy but so very worried you could get worse."

He felt guilty that he caused them pain, but Ophelia noticed and stopped him before he could even speak again. "If anyone is going to be giving apologies it's me. This is my fault.

The moment Oisin and Rosabella passed away it was my duty to come back here and help you. Tamlin, you needed guidance, love, and compassion, you got none of those things from your family. I knew this but didn't return until Tamarand became High Lord. I'm so very sorry. Had I come to help sooner maybe you wouldn't have gotten to this state."

"Mom, that isn't your fault! You were trying to look out for your children's safety!" He quickly defended her.

"You were my child too!" Ophelia told him as tears began to fall. "I held you as a baby! I...I helped care for all three of you but I was scared to return even when the danger was gone!"

" We should've tried to save you," Asteria admitted.

He didn't let them speak anymore and instead hugged them. " You are the best parents a child could ask for, and I won't hear anything against it! If not for you I don't think I'd be here right now. As I sank all I could do was think of you and of my siblings. I didn't want to be a burden anymore."

"Tamlin, you could never be a burden, we all love you too much." Tamarand reaffirmed.

"I know. I should've held onto that instead of listening to them. It won't happen again. I been forgiven."

"Forgiven?...Oh, did you see them?"

" Dorevan, Andras, and ZDaphne were there. She especially wanted me to say she loves and misses you all, and that she's happily waiting for you."

The others cried by smiled too. Tamrand spoke again. "Then we should honor her wishes, and be happy together before meeting again."

The sound of yelling woke her up. Azalea sat up to see three figures arguing in front of her. It was Tarquin, Cresseida and Varian.

"You can't do this to me! And for what? A woman who solves her problems by mutilating her enemies!"

"Need I remind you, Varian, that this is the one and only time we've seen Azalea get enraged and that doesn't mean that she acts like this on a regular basis," Cresseida told him, she sounded exhausted but remained calm. "Not to mention Amren isn't a stranger to violence either."

"I don't believe you! We know the Spring Court has a tendency to have unstable magic users, what if she's just like her brothers?!"

"Enough Varian! I'm not rescinding the rubies nor am I breaking off my engagement with Azalea much less punishing her for what happened tonight! If you wish to continue your courtship with Amren feel free to do so, but she's not welcome in my court!"

She'd never seen him so enraged. Her betrothed was a calm, kind, smiley man, not this vicious raging specter of glowing blue eyes that stood in front of her, arguing with his cousin.

"Tarquin?" She called out, hoping that would calm him down.

His eyes still glowed but his rage subsided as he rushed to her bedside kneeling before her, taking her hands in his. "Are you well, love?"

She smiled at him. "I'm fine, just a little sore."

"So that's it, you keep your feral mate and we all just have to accept it?!"

Anger took over him again, and this time reaching did nothing. "If you don't like the way I do things maybe you should leave for the Night Court!"

"And maybe I should've been the High Lord!"

"Varian!"

Cresseida's loud yell was overshadowed by the sound of a slap that echoed in the room. It was enough to have Azalea on her feet despite the dizziness.

Tarquin didn't wait for his cousin to recover from the blow, he instead pulled him up so they'd be looking directly at each other. "You want to know why I excuse my bride for this?! It isn't just because I love her!

It's because if anything had happened to you or to Cresseida because of the inner circle they wouldn't just be injured, they'd be dead! But I can see now that my loyalty is a wasted effort!

You better be out the Summer Court by sunrise..."

From rage to tranquil Tarquin stepped out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

"Just what in the mother's name were you thinking?! You know how difficult High Kord duties have been for him!" Cresseida roared at her brother.

"You're mad at me?! He's the one throwing his position by standing up for a madwoman!

"I'm standing right here!" Azalea protested. "And while your family situation is none of my business, well at least for now, I don't appreciate you insulting him for his decision!"

"Oh please like you wouldn't be doing the same if he cast you out for this!"

"If his lordship decided he wanted to call off our alliance and engagement for my actions today then I would walk away without a word and never come back.

I love him. I will never deny that, but regardless of that, I'm not the type of person to beg anyone to stay by my side. You can ask Miss Reed if you'd like. Tarquin knows that family is the most important thing to me, and he knows that if I had to choose between my image or my family I would choose the latter everytime.

I have no regrets for what I did tonight, much less if he'll still have me afterward."

The prince was enraged, he glared at her yet said nothing, crossing his arms and pacing around the room.

"You see, Varian. You see why I defend Azalea over Amren despite them both hailing from different courts!

Your lady stole from us when we extended a hand for alliance despite her lord killing many of our cousins, she's never shown any interest in the court's culture or in respecting our family, her high lord has done nothing but meddle in our affairs or worsen them, and to top it all off you chose her over our cousin as if she's oh so great to you when I can tell you're affectionate one in that relationship!

Azalea has been nothing but respectful since coming to court, she's dealt with the officials, passed her tests, and actually cares for Tarquin! So if you want us to give Amren a chance or at the very least be civil then maybe tell her calling our late cousin an eyesore upon first meeting wasn't the best route to take!"

"You're just angry because Rhysand turned you down!"

She thought Cresseida would strike as well, but the princess remained calm even if rage radiated from her beautiful form."No, Varian. While I don't particularly enjoy being rejected but if it's a blow to my ego I can survive it.

What I can't forget nor forgive is you gifting that little gremlin an ancient family heirloom after Tarquin banned them the first time! You undermined our cousin who has enough to deal with already, continued to do so before he ever lifted the ban, and decided to keep on choosing her over the people who suffered by your side for 50 years and have loved you forever!

I'm aware that when you chose a partner and marry they become your new family, but you weren't even in a relationship with her before deciding to betray us for her sake.

So don't ask me to be on your side for this, to not be mad or to not hate her because that's never going to happen!"

She could tell her friend was on the verge of breaking down, so Azalea walked over to where she was and held her.

"They're trying to change! You both wrote them off after they took the book! Nothing they did was good enough for you! How am I meant to mediate if no one's willing to try?!"

Azalea sighed and looked at Cresseida, the princess understood her silent question and they both turned towards Varian.

"You wish to know why we're apprehensive towards Night? It is because they have not changed. Rhysand and Feyre are plotting to take over as High King and Queen of Prythian."

"What?"

They told him everything. About

Nesta's escape, the alliance between courts, the reason for Azalea and Tarquin's marriage deal, and the disdain for Night everyone seemed to have despite Azalea's aggression tonight.

Varian was speechless and for a moment Azalea thought he would faint.

"Varian?"

"Oh fuck...If what you're saying is true...Oh, mother."

"Please tell me she's not pregnant!" Cresseida quickly asked.

"No! Not at all. I...I asked her to live with me. About three months ago I told her we could move to Night or she could retire here. She said she'd think about it.

Tonight at the ball she told me she wanted to settle here now that Rhysand and Feyre had a child and things were mostly under control, told me to start looking for houses in the north..."

"That's, near the Night sea..." Azalea concluded.

Amren wanted a strategic position. She could communicate with her court and also have a good point of entry to attack if Tarquin didn't yield to them.

"She's not...she didn't want me, she wants the court!"

"Perhaps this is all bad timing?" Cresseida tried to suggest but the trio knew better.

"I can't believe this! How could I have been so blind?! She's been using me this whole time...

Tarquin was right to exile me. I turned my back on you both and...Miss Ambrose, I'm sorry."

"Water under the bridge, don't worry about me. Though I believe you should apologize to Tarquin."

"No, he must be seething right now. Let him sleep on it. You're the only one he wants to see in this moment." Cresseida turned towards her brother. "I'll help you pack. Stay with the Vanserras until we talk him down. Then you can decide what to do about Amren."

With that she walked away, deciding to clean herself up and get ready to comfort Tarquin.

Tamlin fell asleep until he felt a familiar touch gently caressing his face. He smiled as he opened his eyes.

"Evening handsome."

"Evening my sweetheart. Shouldn't we go to sleep now, it's almost 2."

"We should, but Lunara, Clare, and Grim all insisted I ate before sleeping. Thought I could admire you until it was time to join you."

"You never could get enough of my pretty face."

"No, I could not."

He sat up. Not a word had left him before Lucien pressed his finger against Tamlin's lips. "Don't you dare apologize! Not for this, never for this."

The redhead felt his heart shatter from the sad gaze Tamlin gave him. "I heard everyone calling out for me. Your voice was the loudest and the one that made me return.

I saw Daphne and Dorevan and even Andras, we were all leaving but when I heard you call out for me so desperately I knew I couldn't dare leave you behind.

It reminded me of the nights you cried for Jess. How hopeless everything was and your pain...it would be unforgivable for me to put you through that again.

If she wasn't there it's because she's probably reincarnated by now and...and if that's the case, she entrusted me to you. Failing her again would also be unforgivable."

He paused leaning into Lucien's touch as the redhead gently ran his fingers through the blonde locks.

"I tried to take things slow because I knew this could happen, that I might become a burden to you again.

Luce, you've spent so many years caring for me, helping me, supporting me, and yet...I can't seem to do the same. You deserve someone like Jesminda. Someone strong-willed, vicious, and brave who will take care of you when you need it, rather than a man who does nothing but fall apart at the slightest provocation."

Lucien said nothing as he pulled Tamlin closed and kissed him. Not a peck on the lips as they'd been doing since ether rekindled their relationship, but a deep passionate kiss like the one they shared on the dancefloor before the evening turned sour.

Tamlin kissed him back, wanting to melt into him as he pulled him close and ran his fingers through that long red hair he loved so much. He pulled away sometimes to hear Lucien gasp at the loss of contact, so many years but he sounded the same, and it drove him crazy.

Once they let go for good Lucien lifted Tamlin's chin, looking into his eyes and smiling sweetly.

"Tam, loving you isn't and will never be a burden to me. It's the easiest thing I've ever done, and the only one I'm certain I'll do until I am no longer Lucien Vanserra.

Not to mention this has never been one-sided because whenever my family became too much to handle, when I had to leave Autumn, and when I nearly followed Jesminda to the grave you were there picking up the pieces and caring for me like a precious treasure. I could never forget that.

I don't blame you for falling apart after everything you've been through, I've been at your side for most of it and often wondered how withstood it all, it would've claimed me sooner than it did you. And while I know you do not fault me for it, a part of me still regrets leaving when you finally broke and needed me most. It's a mistake that won't be repeated.

Because Tam, nothing in this world is going to take me from you, not even death. I want you for a lifetime, as selfish as it sounds. Maybe you wanted me to let you rest and maybe I should've let you go with the others but I just couldn't bear the thought of losing you. Us waking up in the morning, spending time with our friends, staying up late reading or planing, the training sessions or the endless hours we spend talking at the greenhouse...It's all I live for, all I need to be happy is for you to stay.

I'll give you everything you want, remain by your side, follow you anywhere, and love you until our last breath. I love you Tamlin Evergreen, do you love me too?"

"More than my life, more than anything else in the world, I love you, Lucien Vanserra."

"Then stay with me. Stay until we're both at the winter of our lives and inevitably have to pass. Regardless of the pain, or sorrow, or memories stay with me because I will protect and love you like you've done for me. Darkness won't ever claim you again."

"I swear I won't dare leave you again. I'm not letting go of you."

"And neither am I."

Vows were exchanged during weddings, and they had a while to go before thinking about such a thing, still Lucien treasured the vow they just made as he laid Tamlin down and gently kissed his bruises and injuries from tonight's events. The blonde winced but still caressed his head as he did so, keeping his adorning gaze on him.

"You spoil me so much."

"It's because I love you too much. Worry not handsome. Once your injuries have healed I'll spoil you in a far less innocent manner."

Tamlin shivered at those words and merely kissed Lucien. "I look forward to it. It's been very tempting, wearing your clothes, your scent as we sleep. If you knew..."

"If I had known, I would've begged you to do that to me and worst. I've missed you in more ways than one."

Tamlin chuckled and Lucien gasped as he was pulled by the hair. "Then let me give you a taste."

Both of them were exhausted and yet those messy loving kisses were enough to keep them up for at least another hour. They could sleep in tomorrow, Asteria herself insisted they did.

They would wake tomorrow, tell the others they were now officially a couple and he would help Tamlin look for other methods to help him heal. For now, they would rest and he'd keep watch protecting his Spring Lord from the shadows of the Night.

Tamlin felt so secure in Lucien's embrace that he fell asleep as soon as they were done kissing. It has been centuries since he felt that fulfilled.

Staying was the right choice, but he wouldn't dare conform with a healthy weight and better sleep this time. He'd do whatever he had to fully heal. No one would ever push him over the edge again, not just for his family's sake but for his own.

Tamlin fell asleep almost immediately after they cuddled close, but Lucien remained awake for a while longer. His gaze lingered on the bandaged-up shoulder of his beloved Tamlin and on his resting yet exhausted face.

The same had happened years ago when he came running to Spring covered in blood and being chased by Tybalt, Gideon, and Arryn.

He didn't know how it happened but he'd taken Arryn down with just a dagger and his sorrowful rage, he came to and only saw Tamlin throwing Gideon's bloodied body down as Tybalt ran off.

"Shhhhh, it's okay. I'll bury them. You're safe here now, Luce. Look at me, you're safe.

He nodded, whatever happened after was a blur. Vague memories of taking a quick bath and washing away the blood along with those of wine were the only ones remaining until both he and Tamlin were holding on to each other on the bed silently crying.

"Had I known, I would've begged you to come here sooner."

"It's not your fault. It's mine. I thought too highly of them, I thought that the worst they would do is exile us!" His throat hurt from all the screaming and crying he'd endured.

Tamlin kept on holding him, gently running his fingers through his hair and kissing his forehead. "I'll protect you, I'll take care of you. Please Lucien don't leave, don't follow. She wouldn't want this. I don't want this."

That was enough to keep him alive. He wouldn't dare leave if Tamlin begged him to stay.

Lucien just nuzzled close as he whispered. "I love you too much to leave you."

He didn't know then that his best friend had romantic feelings for him, but Tamlin did tense up at those words before chuckling. "I love you too. You're the light of my life."

It was a love confession, like the thousand others he'd missed before, though it didn't bother the blonde, who despite his own sadness found solace in still having him by his side.

"Tam, thank you for saving me."

"Anytime Luce."

He looked at Tamlin's sleeping face again. This time he was the one holding onto him refusing to let go.

'I wish I'd been able to stop this. To take us back to the days when the sun always shone and the court was full of friends and fresh blooms.

Jesminda entrusted me to you, as she left for next adventure, but I think she left you to me as well. She must've known you both loved me the same.

I was unable to save her, but I'll save you sweetheart, even if it's just by telling you how much I love you every day.

I'll do every I can to save you, Tam. Just stay with me.'

With that he gave Tamlin one last kiss and finally drifted off to sleep, not letting go of the man beside him.

Tamlin didn't let go either.

Tarquin cried enough to feel his eyes stinging. What was supposed to be one of the happiest nights of his life had now turned into a nightmare.

He'd been filled with fear when he heard the first scream and saw the unhinged look in Azalea's eyes. Something horrible happened to turn such a sweet woman into a beast.

He'd try to stop her as she fought the inner circle one by one and slowly shifted into a sphinx, but an invisible barrier stopped anyone from getting near. He wasn't sure if she cast it, or if it had been someone else. By the time it was taken down and the second son of Autumn restrained her, three of the four winged members of the Night Court had lost their wings and the others were bloodied and out cold.

Tarquin would stand by Azalea's side regardless of the reasons given, but when she told him those fiends had caused Tamlin to spiral again, he was tempted to finish them off himself.

The former Lord of Spring had suffered enough for his mistakes and was desperately trying to turn a new leaf. For the life of him, he couldn't understand why the Night Court couldn't even let him have that. He understood part of the man's pain as he too had his court nearly fall for their mistakes. If not for his family he would've ended up in the same position. Although now he wasn't so sure he could say that.

His cousin whom he loved like a brother had confirmed the dreaded suspicions he had since he was crowned. That they would've preferred Varian to be High Lord than him.

While yes he didn't want this position and was likely the last one in line had his other cousins and uncles survived, Tarquin tried so hard to be a worthy High Lord. But apparently, that was not enough.

"Tarquin? May I come in?"

He turned to see his dear Azalea peeking through the door. She'd freshened up before coming here, but even if the blood had been washed away and she now smelled like tulips, he could see bruises upon her from the fight.

"Come in love. Lock the door behind you."

She obeyed, quickly rushing to his side and hugging him tightly. He broke down again. "Oh, darling. I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have caused you so much trouble."

"No, don't apologize. I understand why you did it and trust me I do not fault you at all.

Just hearing about what happened has me worried."

"The boys are handling it and my mothers got a great healer to help, no need to worry.

I appreciate the concern but I didn't come here to talk about Tamlin, but rather about you. Are you okay?"

"No darling, no I'm not."

She held onto him, letting him cry silently a little more.

"Perhaps Varian is right. A High Lord shouldn't be so weak as to fall apart because of a mere comment."

"Tarquin, I'm going to stop you right there. What Varian said was awful, but it was also mistaken.

You've cared so well for this court both during its prosperous times and its recent near destruction. You willingly offered yourself up to me in allyship, and you have kept everything in order while continuously helping balance this economic system. That is more than enough for me to know well that your cousin was sorely mistaken.

Varian is remorseful and will apologize to you when you wish to see him. I think he said that to lash out because of losing Amren but in reality he more than anyone must know how difficult this has been for you, and how well you've handled it regardless.

The people love you, your family loves you, I love you. Tarquin Kelani you're an outstanding High Lord and should never think of yourself as less."

He smiled as he pressed his lips against hers. "You really know how to raise a man's spirit.

Darling, if it had been just his comment maybe I wouldn't have reacted this way. But past experiences have proven him right."

Azalea tilted her head, she didn't seem to understand this claim. "What do you mean?"

"Under the mountain. Your court joined us for three months before Amarantha died. Before that however she trapped the others and...Nostrus planned a rebellion alongside other High Lords, but you must know how that ended."

She nodded. "I'm aware, your cousin was a great High Lord, it pains me to know that even at the end he looked out for everyone at the cost of his life."

He smiled, remembering Nostrus and his ever-present big smile. Tarquin missed it so much.

"The power went to my uncle Lono, after he passed it went to his twin sons but they two were killed soon after. I struggle to remember the order but in time it fell to me, and like the others before me I wanted to rebel against Amarantha. Brutius volunteered to escape and lead the charge from Summer to the mountains...You saw how that ended.

Back then Rhysand had enough decency to not tell Amarantha what I planned, I tried to repay the favor by trusting him after we were freed but that was a huge mistake. Varian fell for Amren and I've certainly tried to accept it yet after Night stole from me and caused half the court to fall I could never extend my affection towards her, neither could Cress. After tonight I don't want to see them ever again.

Everything I've done even before the reign began was a mistake. I shouldn't fault anyone for thinking otherwise.

You my dear would make a much better High Lady. You learn quickly, you're so kind and smart, I'm still in awe of how dealt with the land dispute when I was ready to simply hand it over despite Lady Pelekai's protests. I believe that is you who should be ruling this court by the side of a better Lord.

Had anyone else gotten the crown, there would be many more Kelanis alive and the court would be thriving."

Azalea nuzzled close to him, gently rubbing her hand up and down his back. "When Daphne died in my arms I spent a lot of time blaming myself for her demise. I even started to self-harm. It wasn't until my brother convinced me that this was not my fault that I could begin to heal.

There are times however that despite all logic and proof of the contrary I find myself in front of her grave begging for forgiveness. I know she'd give it to me, but I ask for it repeatedly in hopes that one day the guilt would stop.

Our loved ones died, it wasn't our fault. We didn't start this war and we weren't the ones to help our enemies by selfishly sinking others. Your cousins loved you, my sister loved me, and while we would've done anything to save them, we weren't able to. That does not mean we failed them.

You've given your all to protect and rule the court your cousin left for you, you are not bitter about it, even when your passion lies with marine study. You tried to make amends with Night despite your resentment even if it didn't work, you still tried. You are working towards equity between classes, no other High Lord has done that before. I'm certain your late family would be immensely proud of you.

I'm flattered you think highly of me as well, and as long as I'm able to I shall prove my worth, but you must know that the woman behind said qualities also has her less-than-stellar moments.

If I wake before the sun rises I will look worse than a suriel. I'm constantly second-guessing myself, and anxious without even drinking coffee. Unless a dress code is stated I could spend all day in a plain dress and lab gear. I'm emotional, very very emotional. Tonight you witnessed what happens when I lose control. I have no regrets about it but diplomatically speaking it wasn't my best move.

Regardless you love me and trust me to help, and I swear to you I'll help you as your loyal wife. You're not going to carry this alone anymore Tarquin. We are both making our loved ones proud.

This Court will shine brighter than ever, and it'll be because of you."

He believed her, maybe because everything Azalea spoke he was compelled to listen attentively and be in awe, or maybe because for a moment he could feel as if the people he desperately wanted to save were here with them, telling him to finally let go.

"I must've been a saint in my past life, to earn a bride like you now. Thank you, Azalea. I love you."

"I love you too."

She gave him a soft kiss and they lay on the fluffy bed, silently holding on to each other until sleep took over.

Tomorrow they could talk to the court if they had questions, he could speak to Varian once he had slept and put himself at ease, and they could check on Tamlin.

For now, he just wanted to rest beside his bride.

No, not just his bride, he wanted to rest beside his mate.

"You're welcome to stay here as long as you wish Varian. I know familial disputes can be taxing." Eris glared at Nemesis.

"What are you looking at me for? I just broke one window this week!"

"Brother, I love you, but sometimes you'll vex me."

"Awwww, no need to flatter me Eri, you know I love you too!"

Eris rolled his eyes. Despite the good state of the court during their rule, he was growing exhausted and his brother's antics didn't help the matters. Thankfully their guest didn't seem to mind.

"I appreciate your hospitality my lord's. I promise you I shall be out of your hair as soon as possible. If I may help you with anything please let me know."

"Eris!" Cedric screamed as he ran into the throne room.

"What happened now?!" He said as his younger brother used his alchemy tricks to hide in the walls.

Eris nearly fainted when he saw Tybalt chasing Cedric.

"Weren't you fuckin dead?!" Nemesis asked as he restrained his brother from attacking. "Fuck he's cold! Cedric did you accidentally make a zombie?!"

"Nemesis don't be ridiculous! Zombies don't exist!" Cedric's voice echoed in the walls. "When father fell into a coma and I had to attack Tybalt to save you I didn't kill him as I thought. The sword didn't pierce his heart and instead of embalming him, I used spells and tech to heal him.

But it would take time for the ancient spells to fully fix the damaged organs so...I stuffed him in the lab cooler and he woke up mad!"

He wanted to scream, Varian was scratching his head and Nemesis was laughing so hard he started coughing.

"Oh gods, oh this is too fucking funny! Tybalt, you were iced for almost three months! Does this mean we can drop you off in winter?"He asked in between fits of giggling.

"Fuck off you nutcase! I want revenge, that one tried to kill me!"

Nemesis's funny facade turned sour in an instant and he put his brother in a chokehold. "Yeah, and you almost killed Eris. If you haven't noticed we've all nearly axed each other at least once so calm down unless you want me to take a turn!"

"Enough! Tybalt go get checked by a healer. We left your room as it was and it is still being cleaned, you may go there if you wish.

Nemesis let go and go to bed I can tell you're starting to get manic and once that stops you're not passing out on the floor again.

Cedric go back to the lab, lock the doors, and stay there until everything's calm. They all obeyed and went their separate ways at his orders. He guided Varian to his room, the prince didn't seem all too shaken up by the strangeness he witnessed. If anything he seemed happy.

"Must be nice to have so many brothers."

"Oh no, we were often at each other's throats when Beron was around. Now that he's gone we're cooperating more, as you can see it's not always harmonious."

"Pity. You all seem to work well together. Cherish them, my lord. Family is very important."

That he wouldn't doubt. Despite that every single one of them had darkness, anger, and hate within them, there was something of a hidden kinship between the siblings. They'd cover for each other at times, or try to heal the others after Beron took out his rage on them. For all their fights and squabbles Eris knew he'd do anything for his brothers.

Especially if Beron came back.

Clare yawned as she walked downstairs. Breakfast was served and their guests were already there along with Tamrarand and his mothers.

"So to help Tamlin it would be best to get him therapy?"

"Yes, my lord. I would recommend my father Cyril, but given the circumstances, Tamlin shouldn't commute to Velaris, nor can I bring my father here. After yesterday it is likely Rhysand will probably keep a tighter grip on everyone."

She walked into the dining room, greeted by Ophelia who passed her a bowl of fruit salad. Everyone acknowledged her before continuing, but despite the calm atmosphere, she noticed Tamarand was still looking glum.

"If I recall correctly, Nesta is getting therapy in the human world. If Tamlin agrees we may suggest he do so there."

"That sounds like a reasonable idea. We shall speak to him once he wakes."

After the meal was over she retired to the gardens, looking for Tamarand. She found him at the graves.

"I don't want to lose him too! He spoke to you both and I know your made him come back but we've gotten lucky twice...if there is a third time."

"Tamarand?"

He wiped his tears and stood up, smiling at her. "Oh hi, Clare! I just wanted to talk to Amdras and Daphne."

She said nothing as she hugged him, he broke down again, crying silently in her arms.

"He'll be fine. We will help him. He knows we all love him."

"I'm just so worried. I thought he was doing better, he's getting weight and muscle and doing the things he loved but...But I was wrong!

Clare, we saw him dead! Cold and lifeless and smiling, he was dead for a while. Lucien was so heartbroken I'm sure if Tamlin had stayed dead he would've tried to follow or go burn Velaris down. Lea looked just like the day we lost Daphne and...I couldn't do anything other than stand there and look at Tam.

This court requires a good leader but I couldn't protect my own brother! Lea is the smart one and she's leaving for Summer! My mothers should rule they're so good with people and magic, I shouldn't be here, I should be there helping Tamlin heal chasing down the inner circle!"

"Shhhhh, no don't say that. Tamlin himself often praises you for being an amazing High Lord. You're doing a great job. The court is blooming and the people are happy. Don't sell yourself short.

Managing a manor is different from managing a court, but if you need help you may lean on me. I'll help you! Don't forget you deserve rest and love too."

"Thank you, Clare. I am so happy to have you with me."

She smiled as they remained there, locked in a hug for a little longer. Despite the setbacks she knew they'd make it out of this stronger.

They would give it their all to save Tamlin.