His whole life, he had felt like he never belonged anywhere. His father's stauncht refusal to tell him who his mother was had always been a point of contention between them, drawing clear lines between their relationship as he grew. He loved his siblings, of course he did - but it was difficult not to resent them them for the fact that they were able to grow up with the privileges of noble children and two loving parents while he was almost begging for scraps of Lord Stark's affection.
When Jon had been summoned to his father's solar, he had thought they were going to discuss his future allegiance to the Night's Watch: he did not want to be a burden for his brother and his future children, he knew Lady Catelyn wanted him gone from her home as fast as possible and that he would never be able to help Robb if the situation called for it. The realm was in a situation of relevant peace, thus he thought his decision would not have any repercussions whatsoever on the future of House Stark.
Discovering he was the son of Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark had turned his world upside down. Learning that his future good sister was his actual sister was another thing he had not been expecting - he knew southerners liked to play games and move to court, which was why the match between Dorne and the North had pulled the rug under him. He was far from a prodigy at politics, but he had immediately understood something was afoot.
When Lord Stark had refused to speak of his mother, he had always thought it was due to his love for her and the respect he bore his lady wife. There was no reason to rehash past "mistakes" for the sake of it and he had tried to do as he had been bid to. He had already considered himself a stain on his father's honor and he had not wanted to create further issues between the Lord of Winterfell and his spouse. Even if he would never admit it, he had hoped for a love story between two people who had been wrenched apart by the expectations of nobles, a tale reminiscent of the songs his cousin Sansa liked and cried to.
That's exactly what he got.
When Rhaenyra had insulted his parents, his first instincts had been to defend them: was this jealousy? Because he had been wanted and not her? Because she would have been hidden in Dorne to prevent her from becoming a pawn for the Targaryens even if the Rebellion had failed? Jon quickly felt ashamed of his own thoughts and clambered down on his indignation.
He might bear the name Snow, but he had the blood of the Starks in his veins and he had always understood the importance of duty. A Stark was as good as his word - and Lyanna had been promised to the Lord Paramount of the Stormlands. She might not have liked the arrangement or the betrothal, but all noble ladies were victim of the same fate: to marry, bring heirs into the world and help their lord husbands when the situation demanded for it. He was not sure how it worked in Dorne nor how his sister would acclimate to her new surroundings in the North, but his biological mother should've known better than to run away with a married man with two children - especially if he was the crown prince.
To be sincere, Jon did not even want to think about them. He thought about the fact Lyanna had called him Aegon - completely discounting the fact that there was already a living and legitimate one that had been called the heir to the throne in front of every noble that mattered in the realm. Would she have been a second Alicent Hightower? Working her way up to make sure her son sat on the Iron Throne? He did not know much about the Faith of the Seven, but he was pretty sure that they would not have accepted an annulment for the union between Elia Martell and Rhaegar Targaryen since they already had two able-bodied and living heir, even less so for a northerner that they considered nothing more than a heather, when they could've pushed forward someone for the Reach or the Westerlands.
The raven-haired teenager had not known what to do after Rhaenyra had left him under the Godswood - he had a lot to think about, especially with how he would behave around her. When he had heard about her arrival, there was a small part of him that had thought they could've been siblings. After all, there were many rumors of a dalliance between Ned Stark and Ashara Dayne during the Tourney of Harrenhal and it would not be far fetched to imagine thus - he could not have expected them to be related through a father had never considered before.
He heard rustling behind him and he immediately turned around, only to find Robb behind him. "Still brooding Snow?," he asked, a small smile of his face like they were sharing a deep secret.
And they actually were, right?
A male heir from the line of Rhaegar, the Silver Prince and Lyanna, the she-wolf maiden. It was treason to even harbor him here; just as it was treason to have Robb marrying Rhaenyra Targaryen, Aegon VI's twin sister. The most astonishing fact was that she was not even trying to hide her identity: silver hair was common in Essos, but not her silver eyes. She had apparently already met the King who had made it his life's missions to disparage her and denigrate her, but he had only sounded bitter and half-mad at how he had decided to antagonize a second Elia Martell within the Red Keep.
"A trait I got from Father," automatically answered Jon, not even thinking about his words. He winced and looked apologetically at Robb - his cousin knew the truth and he was not aware if his words might grate him or if he would wish for him to stop considering Lord Stark as his parent.
Robb seemed to understand his thoughts since he smiled sincerely at him. "You'll always be my brother." His tone was firm and reassuring him - reminding him why he had never been bitter over the fact his brother was trueborn. Jealous and envious? Sometimes, but never had it crossed his mind to take over his rightful place. "How does it feel? To know?," he finally inquired, discussing the real reason of his appearance in their sanctuary.
"It's weird to think that I had a sister all this time and that I have never met her before," he mumbled, trying to act detached even though his facial expression betrayed his mind.
Jon did not know what to think or to believe: it would be hard for Rhaenyra to look at him and see something more than the reason why her family was butchered by the Baratheons and the Lannisters and even though he did not want to think about his birth parents, he liked to think Rhaegar would want him to stay around his daughter he had never met in order to protect her.
Before today, there had never been any other vocation for him other than the Night's Watch. Now? Even if he stayed a bastard his whole life he could be sworn shield. He could protect his nephews and nieces that would share his Stark and Targaryen blood. It was surreal to even imagine - but he was reassured that Robb would treat her kindly at the very least, if he was not already smitten.
"You seem like you haven't slept well," pointed out Jon, looking his childhood companion up and down. He had small dark circles under his river blue eyes, making them prominent and a frown on his face. As soon as he finished his sentence, he noticed how jittery Robb got and how he tried not to flinch away from his gaze.
The situation was a little bit suspicious, but he tried not to read too much into it. "Don't tell me you've already followed Theon at the brothel after one day of your betrothed arrival," he whispered, feeling oddly hurt in his sister's stead. It was peculiar to think he was already trying to protect whilst not knowing much about her - he promised he would try and that he would not his father's mistake draw a bridge between them. He had no idea of what might happen in the future, but he would be by Robb and Rhaenyra's side through it, this he swore.
"She...came to my room last night," started the auburn-haired boy, looking timid for the first time since he met a girl. He was not the type to throw himself into maidens' bed - but he had never shied away from the pleasure of the flesh, unlike him. "We did things. Well, she did things to me," he specified when he noticed his cousin's dumbfounded looks.
As he was going to start berating him for their lack of caution after one day of knowing each other, he noticed the Sand Snakes walking towards' Rhaenyra's chambers while muttering angry to each other. He did not know them - but he knew enough about them to understand they could easily get rid of him and his cousin if they ever hurt their "little sister". It took only a brief glance between the two mischievous teenagers before they started trailing them.
It was not as well-known as the secret passages of the Red Keep created by Maegor, but Winterfell was ancient and had never fallen before for many reasons - one of them being failsafes if the keep was ever stormed. Since Rhaenyra and Prince Oberyn shared a solar easily accessible, it was only fair for them to find out a way to spy on them. They wanted to trust them, but it was difficult after finding out so many secrets in the span of twenty four hours. They were also a bit intimidated by the mere presence of the Red Viper, especially since it was inconceivable to imagine him as a caring father - and yet, he was as close as ever with his daughters.
"Skagos? Seriously Rhae?," complained Obara while polishing her daggers. "I still think it's a fever dream and you won't find him there."
Jon chanced a look at his brother and was surprised to see a speck of jealousy on his face at the mention of him. They did not know much about the princess' life before she made her journey to Winterfell aside from her intellect and her prowess in arms; aside from a few rumors about a probable betrothal between her and the heir of Highgarden before it had been dropped as soon as it had been brought up.
He noticed that Robb was too busy looking at the white haired maiden to think about much else, especially not his reaction after knowing something for less than a day.
Rhaenyra had her hair down for the first time and was dressed in a yellow sunny dress, always reminding people around her of her origins. He knew she would have to change her dresses once she was officially wed to his brother and would be a Stark, but he understood her willingness to hold on to her roots as much as possible. Had he known he would lose all sense of identity after learning who his mother was, he might have told his past self to stop insisting so much.
She was visibly annoyed by their lack of belief in her, her cheeks red and her brows furrowed in frustration. "I hear them...I see them in my dreams," she said, looking at her father imploringly. "Cannibal and Sheepstealer are waiting for Jon and me to claim them, I swear !"
Just before Jon and Robb were going to dash out of their hiding space in order to discuss what they had just heard, they felt someone looking at them. Turning around, they were met with a pair of curious violet eyes before they focused again on her family.
"I'll come back in less than a week, I swear it."
No sound was heard for a few minutes before Prince Oberyn sat next to Rhaenyra and put his forehead on her shoulder, looking drained of fighting and pleading. She was the last vestige of his sister - the only child she had left in this world after doing her duty and bringing the three heads of the dragon into this world. It was completely understandable that he would be worried about losing her, especially so far from home and for an impossible mission.
"We'll leave at dawn tomorrow," he finally muttered to Rhaenyra's delight and the Sand Snakes' outrage. "It will leave enough time for the Northern Lords to bring their ass back here."