Fate Grand Order is the creation and intellectual property of Nasu Kinoko and Type-Moon.

Mortadelo y Filemon and all related elements are the creation and intellectual property of Francisco Ibañez and Editorial Bruguera/Ediciones B.

Still Better than Black Keys.

Chapter Seventy One.

RIP Francisco Ibañez.

Assassin.

Real Names: Mortadelo Gurrichorrizabálaga Azpeitiscmicorchea and Filemón Pi Piripí.

Other Names and Aliases: Mortadelo and Filemon, Mort and Phil, Clever and Smart.

Gender: Male.

Alignment: Chaotic Good.

Attribute: Human.

Parameters:

Strength: E

Endurance: EX

Agility: C+

Mana: D+

Luck: E

Noble Phantasm: C

Likes: Women, smoking, drinking.

Dislikes: Professor Bacterio, Miss Ophelia.

Natural Enemy: Antofagasto Panocho, General Bruteztrausen, Prince Charles of England, Magin el Mago, Chapeau el Esmirriau, Jimmy the Joker, Mr. Probeta, Doctor Bichez, Jeremias the prophet, El Chota, El Bacilon, Lucrecio Borgio, Bruno Megawatt, Rodofo Cobardino, El Rana, Professor Von Nassen.

Biography:

Born in a small hamlet in the deepest mountains of Spain, Mortadelo was a fan of disguises since his earliest boyhood, using that ability to play practical jokes on relatives and teachers. Alas, this was the only talent he had. On the plus side, when he grew into a young man he developed a long, striking black mane of hair that prided him. On the minus side, his first job was that of a lab assistant to biologist Professor Saturnino Bacterio, who tested a hair lotion on him. The lotion left Mortadelo completely bald, which made him hate the Professor with raging zeal for the rest of their lives.

Filemon was born with no real talents of any kind, other than being able to take incredible amounts of physical abuse and sometimes repay them with brute force. He also always had only two hairs on his head. Despite that lack of law enforcement qualities he decided opening a detective agency, employing Mortadelo as his subordinate. In a short time they were bankrupt and took applications as secret agents for spionage organization AUNT (Aeroterrachean Unit of Neutalization Technicians) under Superintendent Vicente Ruinez. The 'Super', as the boys call him, was a rotund, mustachoed man with very short temper and tight pockets.

Filemon scored marginally better than Mortadelo in the application tests (they were the only two interested on joining the agency), which allowed him to remain as Mortadelo's Boss. They carried out hundreds of missions for AUNT, usually destroying everything in their wake without meaning to.

Class Skill:

Presence Concealment: A

The capacity to annul one's presence, to cloak one's activity. A valuable tool for assassinations, as the killer must not be detected before their grim task is done.

As spies, Mortadelo and Filemon were not above pulling hits on enemies of the state. After tons of travails they always could eventually infiltrate their destinations, aided by Mortadelo's mastery of camouflage. Bumps in the road were guaranteed in all of their sorties; however, despite all of the injuries they would be subjected to along their way, they would perserver until they arrived wherever the Superintendent wanted them to be.

Mortadelo and Filemon both carry small handguns in their persons as part of their spy equipment. Filemon is actually a half decent shooter but Mortadelo is almost guaranteed to miss any shot he makes.

Personal Skills:

Master Pickpocket: C

Both Mortadelo and Filemon have abilities conducent to the successful perpetration of minor scale theft and larceny. They can take almost anyone's valuables away without being detected, aided by their Presence Concealment, and make a relatively clean escape. In other wrongs, they have the attitude and moral character of cheap thieves.

This tool is priceless to have in the event a valuable object must be seized, but the Rank is lowered because Mortadelo and Filemon would habitually steal the wrong object from their target. Then they would have to go back for another attempt at picking their pockets or chests of valuable belongings.

Master of Disguise: EX

(Mortadelo only).

Several disguises will give Mortadelo the skill of the animal, individual or object he is costumed as. For instance, he can glide around when wearing the disguise of an eagle or a giant butterfly, and the guns in his soldier disguise are functional. But there are limits to this skill. If disguised as Superman, he won't gain any of Superman's powers, nd he can't lay eggs if he's disguised as a hen.

With every disguise, Mortadelo's long nose and bottle bottom glasses are clearly seen, but this will never reveal his idenity, no matter how obvious they are. The only exception is his leather perfect Sylvester Stallone disguise. Exception to the nose and glasses, that is. The disguise works just as well as all the others.

Even Servants with Eye of the Mind cannot see through Mortadelo's disguises. However, the effect passes as soon as Mortadelo attacks, and then he is recognizable by anyone in his viewing range.

Filemon can't disguise himself, but he can hide himself within several of Mortadelo's disguises, taking refuge in the shell of turtle Mortadelo or a papoose bag on the back of American Native Mortadelo, for instance.

Disengage: A

Mortadelo and Filemon could always flee the scene of a disaster. No matter how many eyes are set on them at the time, escape is possible with light feet and the ocassional stolen vehicle.

This skill is further aided by Mortadelo's disguises.

In no time, this duo could make clean travels to the Middle East or the North Pole to put distance between their pursuers and them. As Servants, the geographical amount achieved during a chase depends on the quantity of mana they may have received.

Kavorka Man: C

(Mortadelo only).

Despite Mortadelo's lack of physical appeal, he is still reasonably successful with women, without needing to disguise himself, including AUNT secretary Miss Ophelia (whom Mortadelo despises), Hans Christian Andersen's Little Mermaid, and the girlfriend of Captain Trueno (also summonable as a Saber) Sigrid of Thule. Female Servants who are not excessively discriminating may fall for him after some time, or they may just abhor Mortadelo, instead.

Filemon doesn't have this skill, since he has no luck whatsoever wooing women.

Noble Phantasm:

El Sulfato Atomico- The Atomic Sulfate: C

A tool designed by Professor Bacterio and employed liberally by our boys during their most celebrated and most successful adventure. The Sulphate makes any insect, arachnid, worm, or any similar invertebrate vermin grown to gigantic size and start attacking everything and everyone in their way. It manifests as a pair spray cans in the hands of the two men, which they can shoot in any direction of their choice.

With it, Mort and Phil went into the People's Republic of Tyrannia, and overthrew General Bruteztrausen and his army. As a Noble Phantasm, the can never runs out unless the agents themselves run out of mana. The enlarged insects become bulletproof and incredibly powerful, able to take on even moderately strong Heroic Spirits. They won't attack Mortadelo and Filemon themselves until they have struck down everyone else in their vicinity, but if the insects are still in any battling shape by then, once they are done with the enemy they'll turn on them. At that point the Disengage Skill is their best choice.

Summon: "You called? The AUNT has sent his best man, me, Filemon, and my sidekick Mortadelo here! Servant Assassin, ready for duty, Chief!"

"It seems the Boss got the order of the thing wrong, but that's the basic idea. Hey, you! What's up? What's the job, and can't someone else do it?"

Start of Battle:

"Outta my way, Mortadelo! This small fry's done for!"

"It's all yours, Boss..."

"They look kinda big, Mortadelo... That is, you can go first, prove yourself!"

"Very kind of you, Boss!"

Attack:

"Toma del frasco, Carrasco!"

"Take this!"

"Toma castaña!"

"Heh heh!"

Damage:

"Not in the face!"

Glllglll...!"

"Mortadeloooooo!"

"Su padre!"

Victory:

"What do we say when we win, Boss? It's been so long since that happened!"

"Alright! Now let's go for some drinks!"

"Jolin! If only the Super could see us!"

"Take that, James Bond!"

Defeat:

"Sapristi!"

"Run, Boss, run!"

"Mortadelo, you idiot! This is your fault!"

"Why do you blame me, Boss? It was just Fate after all!"

Defeat by Noble Phantasm: "Our mission! Our jobs! Our workplace! You blew it up, Mortadelo!"

"Corcho, Boss! And you blew your top up, but nobody's saying...!"

Noble Phantasm Activation: "What, Mortadelo? Do you still have it?"

"What do you mean, the Atomic Sulfate? You betcha, Boss!"

Extra Dialogue:

"Boss, what's wrong with her? I was just being nice to her!"

"Bah, forget her! Who wants a woman who behaves like a man?" (When you have Rider or Archer Francis Drake).

"Look, Boss! It's Don Quixote! A fellow Spaniard!"

"Let's go shake hands with him, Mortadelo! We must be kind with our less illustrious compatriots!" (When you have Lancer Don Quixote).

"Oh, Boss, isn't he adorable? Hans Christian Andersen! My father in law!"

"A brat? Mortadelo, he doesn't look happy at you..." (When you have Caster Hans Christian Andersen).

"Pffft, let's go back the other way, Mortadelo. It's that cooler than you idiot..."

"Hah, he wishes he were half the agent we are, doesn't he?" (When you have Assassin James Bond).

Birthday:

"Happy Birthday, Chief! Let's go get plastered up! It's on Mortadelo!"

"But Boss, the Master can't drink! She's underage!"

"Ah, then the drinks are on me!"

Event:

"Chief, Boss, look! Many Servants are gathering in that place!"

"Any beautiful women in the lot, Mortadelo?"

"Yes, many!"

"Oh, then it's worth looking into it!"

Holy Grail: "Did you hear that, Boss? A cup that grantes wishes!"

"That's no so odd! Whenever I drink I see all my wishes come true!"

"No, no, that's for real!"

"No joke? Don't try to fool me, Mortadelo!"

"No joke, Boss! What would you wish from it?"

"For starters, I'd wish to be my own Servant instead of being tied to such a dumbarse!"

To be Continued.