Okay guys this is literally my first Fanfiction that I am posting. If I decide tocontinue posts will be weekly and I may split it up into books or just keep it runningI haven't decided. All criticism is great! EXCPET y'all hating on Sakura. Also I am going to go ahead a say TW! eating disorder references. I don't want anyone to get triggered and relapse bc I know that I would 3. Also I read a fanfiction really similar to how I am planning to start this but dw, it is going to be nothing similar too it. I haven't read it in a couple years so I don't remember who it was by, but I def took Inspo from them.

I don't own Naruto, if I did Sakura would have sought out training earlier.

Chapter 1: Intro to strength!

"They are always so ahead of me, I am always staring at their backs…. I wish I could feel useful." Sakura thought sadly. The atmosphere is grim already as Kakashi carries Sasuke on his back and Naruto walks along slowly. This scene felt all too familiar. She stared at their backs as they walked ahead of her. I mean throughout the whole mission to the land of waves she did nothing but stand around and do nothing and cry. Okay, she did help with meals and housework, but she just stood in front of Tazuna, and that was her real mission. As she thought more and more she felt a determination come over her. No matter what, she has a new promise to keep. Protect her precious people, and make them watch her back instead. So she did what she knew to do as soon as she was back in Konoha. Study. Read up on the things she wanted to use. She woke up early on her day off, since Kakashi had to give a mission report, the team was free to do whatever she wanted today. She not only wanted to be ahead of her teammates but also being ahead of them meant protecting them. So she decided to read up on medical ninjutsu first. As she gave a curt nod to the man at the desk she saw frequently due to her love of reading, she headed towards the genin section of the library. She chose two books carefully, since that was the amount she was allowed to check out at her age and rank, and checked out her first two books on medical Jutsu.

"Just these two today, shinobi-san," Sakura says towards the familiar-looking man.

"Hmm, medical ninjutsu kid? Alright. And I see you in here so much you might as well call me by my name. It is Genma kid." Genma started lazily. " I also didn't see you at all the past two weeks. You go on your first out of village mission? You are still wet around the ears so I didn't expect that." The man said with the amused smirk he wore all the time as he typed the book numbers into the computer under Sakura's name. Somehow this man knew all, but it was without surprise. He was high ranking.

"Yes, I did Genma-san. To be honest I felt useless. It ended up not being a C-rank but a B-rank or A-rank. It was scary and I did nothing." Sakura said sadly but honestly. There was something about Genma that just gave off an air of honesty and comfort to her. He also seemed slightly pissed off as he clenched his jaw.

"Don't sweat it, kid, that shouldn't have even happened to begin with, and maybe you were useless. But you aren't being sent here in a shoe-box, and put 6 feet under so celebrate that. Besides if your sensei, whoever he may be, was doing what he should have. He would have turned around the minute you guys were put in that level of danger." Genma said as he smiled more. It was a mixture of a shit-eating grin and a comforting grin.

Sakura just gave back a simple thanks Genma-san and grabbed her books and headed for home. On her way home she took her time and self-reflected on Genma's words. He was right, she wasn't dead. She made it out alive. She could still improve so she didn't feel useless. She silently thanked Genma in her mind and turned into her house's pathway in the civilian district. Sakura walked in and took her shoes off as she grabbed lunch off the counter her mom had made for her and took it to her room. She looked around wondering where her mother was, but she was probably at some event.

She looked around and couldn't sense anything. So she deemed it safe to go to her room without disturbing her parents.

She sat on her bed as she threw her pack on the ground and the books on her bed. As she opened the bento box she became aware that she should start cooking more for herself. Her mom, being a high-ranking civilian, was obsessed with dieting and looking perfect for the male gaze. She was the definition of a Trophy wife, and she was proud of this. Sadly though, everyone needs something to be proud of. This probably affected Sakura more than she realized mentally and physically. But for now, it would have to do. She gazed into the Salad, which was meatless and lacked protein with her "supplements". She threw her supplements into the trash can beside her bed. Sakura ate in silence and in thought as she skimmed over the books looking for key things so they would be easier to remember later. She took her dishes downstairs and rinsed them off. It was close to 2 am now. Sakura looked down the hall to her parent's room and saw that the door was closed, which meant they were home.

She quietly put her dishes away.

Sakura went upstairs and showered before throwing on a big shirt and sweats. Sakura moved her things to her desk and put her hair up with a clip. She was up all night reading over them and finishing them, taking notes, and taking in the theory as best as she could. After what seemed like hours of annotating and reading she glanced up at her clock. Having finished both books and understanding the theory behind med-ninjutsu, Sakura deemed she could break for a minute.

'Huh, 4- o'clock. I have time to shower and get some tasks done. But I should sleep first while I have time. I shouldn't cram just because I am trying to improve. Until I get better it is important for me to prepare slowly. Strength isn't an overnight process.' Sakura thought. She closed both the books with care and put them in her pack so she would return them tomorrow night after training. She crawled into her bed and looked up at her white ceiling. She fell asleep quickly.

The next morning she woke up at 7, after being bombarded with nightmares from her last mission to wave. She took a moment to journal them, something she picked up a while ago.

Her nightmares consisted of her team dying because she wasn't good enough. And also consisted of her overall re-living the events of her first mission.

She proceeded to stretch out on her bed before feeling some of her joints pop with satisfaction. She rolled over until she rolled into her floor while trying to shake the feeling from her nightmares.

She landed with a thud.

Her parents, if they were normal, would have run up and asked if she was alright. However, she knew better. Children were something seen, not heard. They were like prim and perfect trophies to her parents. As she bit back dry-laughter thinking of her parents, she got up and went to her bathroom.

She turned on the water in her shower and hopped in, feeling good about the temperature. She showered quietly so as to not wake her parents, and went to look in her closet. The red dress, now that she thought about it, was totally a pain in her ass. It was long and heavy, and a bright color. There were so many problems with that, she could be spotted easily, trip on it, and wasn't able to move fast.

So, for now, she put it on and threw on her sandals. She needed new training clothes and asap, which she would get today. Hence waking up early. After all, team practice wasn't for a couple of hours and by the time she got there, she would need to wait a couple more hours.

She then brushed her teeth and washed her face and did all the normal morning routine things, opting to skip breakfast as her stomach was still uneasy from the nightmares, and also the fact that her mom had set out some rice cakes beside her "supplements". Sakura knew what those pills were and they were diet pills. And rice cakes were really like eating nothing, to begin with. She grabbed her pills and shoved them in her pocket before disposing of the rice cakes.

As she headed out of the kitchen she made a bee-line for upstairs knowing she had forgotten something. She ran past her parents' study, the door closed for obvious reasons, grabbed her wallet off her desk, heavy from her recent mission pay and allowance, and headed out the door after the clock hit 8:45 and the shops were open.

As she walked around she worked on her chakra control by always pushing some to her feet and expelling it slowly. And only when she hit an emptier district did she let her thoughts wander.

She, honestly, was embarrassed by herself. During the academy, she gushed over Sasuke-san, putting emphasis on the san, never really trained, and was focused more on her looks overall. There are obviously missions where looks are important, but sakura never wanted to join the seduction department, let alone take that kind of mission yet. She would rather never do them if she could help it, but going on at least one seduction mission was required.

And her obsession with marrying young, and being a perfect housewife for a perfect husband, had stemmed from her mom certainly. That was all Sakura had been preached since she was born. And her parents were not exactly happy with the thought of her being a kunoichi.

She let her thoughts continue to wonder when she stopped in her tracks, where should she go to get good quality clothes? The dress was a gift from Ino-pig and such.

As she reflected on her past some more and thought about her dilemma she ran into a heavy chest and bounced back a bit with an oouf, losing her concentration on her chakra control.

"Ahh shit I'm sorry… oh it's just you kid." Sakura glanced up at the tall familiar figure. After all, Sakura only knew one person that called her kid at the moment.

"Ah Genma-san, my bad, I was thinking and I guess I didn't notice anyone," Sakura said with a slight laugh out of embarrassment as she rubbed the back of her head. She had been so caught up she ran into a jonin, she definitely needs to work on awareness. She noted to look for a sensei that would train her as soon as she could. After all, a lack of awareness will get you killed on a real mission.

"Well I am glad I broke you from your thoughts, you looked like you were going to pass a kidney stone, to be honest. But that aside, it is barely 9 why are you in town so early?" Genma asked with a cocky smirk that sakura swears is plastered on his face. He also had his eyebrow raised as if daring her to lie, or be snarky back. That was after all his job, not hers.

"Ah, I am getting new training gear and stuff," Sakura admitted honestly. After all, who knew what Genma would do if she lied. He didn't become a special jounin for anything.

"Well all I have to say is, about fucking time kid, not to sound informal suddenly but you walking into the library every day with that bright-ass dress was going to blind me eventually," Genma admitted with a cocky laugh as Sakura huffed a bit. She clearly hadn't thought it was that bad. And informal suddenly? Sakura barely knew him, but he always lacked some sort of respect. She assumed that it was okay for him to lack it, after all, he was probably more traumatized than she could ever be, and plus they were kind of becoming friends.

"Well, I have something to ask. Would you maybe help me? I don't really know where to go to get good shinobi clothes to be honest." Sakura said with a look of pleading. She made sure to add extra guilt to try and get him to help even more.

"Why me? Don't you have a sensei or something for that kid?" Genma said with that damn smirk. He continued to chew on his senbon as he mulled over it for a second. Was this really the same man that was insulting copy-cat Kakashi the day before?

"First of all It is Sakura, Second of all, I don't feel like he would help that much with that kind of thing," Sakura said with a bit of sass due to his use of kid and pinky rather than her name. He certainly was crushing her patience but she also kind of liked the nicknames. Not that she would give him the satisfaction of knowing that.

"Alright, pinky, I guess I will help out. Follow me." Genma said with a snort. He put extra emphasis on pinky, probably trying to annoy her more. It was working, but welcome. And that was seriously all it took to convince him?

As they walked along Genma got to know her a bit. He said if he was going to see her around more often he might as well know a background of sorts. After all, it would be slightly strange to help out a random person who was probably 30 years his junior.

"So who is this sensei of yours?" Genma asked as he started walking. He had a feeling to take his senbon out and he was correct to assume so.

"Kakashi Hatake," Sakura stated plainly.

"O.h… you are…. shitting…me…... I am sorry kid." Genma managed to choke out as he continued to lose his shit so much that he was clutching his stomach. His senbon in his hand rather than lodged down his throat due to that nice instinct.

"Why? And what is with the laughing? " Sakura asked with a dead-pan look. She suddenly felt tired.

"I fucking hate him that's why," he said still laughing. As he fell onto his knees still laughing. He was laughing because it was funny, but also ironic.

"Why would you tell me this?" Sakura said as her face dead-panned more. Did he not think before he spoke? Sakura could easily run off and tell her Sensei.

"Because you don't seem like the easily offended type and I don't give a fuck about his opinion on me, even if you were to run and tell your sensei. He already knows this anyway." Genma said as his laughing came to a painfully slow and he managed to catch his breath.

"Ah. I can't imagine he will be happy with me asking for your help then. The hate must be mutual." Sakura said with an embarrassed look on her face. She started laughing too, the thought of her sensei hating someone was such a strange thought and idea to her. After all, how could someone who looked like a cyclops, was lazy, and walked around reading porn openly, hate anyone.

"Anyways kid, once you catch your breath we are here," Genma said as they walked into a store that seemed like it took forever to get to. It was dim and the shop owner was a man a couple of years older than Genma, she assumed.

"Ah my ever-faithful customer, what brings you in today?"The man beamed. He clearly liked Genma. The man approached Genma before breaking out in a smile. And saying something about him needing more clothes or something. At this point, Sakura was feeling pooped.

"Just helping out the genin population. I mean look at what she is wearing!" Genma said with an amused smirk and laugh. The man looked grim at her outfit and proceeded to grab stuff off the racks. He made sure to grab muted colors. He didn't even ask her for her size, so he must be pretty skilled. He then stuffed it in a bag and then proceeded to have the audacity to say.

"It is on the house kid, that is an interesting outfit you have on there." The man said dead serious. Apparently, it was not attractive to anyone. Well maybe it was "cute" but she wasn't supposed to be cute. She was a genin and not some snot-nosed academy kid.

"Uh.. thanks?" She said as she took the bag. And turned to walk out, before she was stopped by someone grabbing her shoulder.

"Also maam, can you put on some of the clothes, in the changing rooms in the back? I am seriously not going to allow you to walk out of here looking like that. Bad for business." The man laughed. "Also just leave that… thing on the rack in the back. I will dispose of it." He said motioning to her dress. Sakura turned around and took a second to breathe before she lost her temper, thinking of her new promise. Then she heard Genma snicker and was seriously debating on changing or killing him.

Sakura went into the back room, locked the door, and pulled out some items from the big bag of clothes. She pulled out some gray full-length pants that scrunched around the ankles, some black shinobi sandals, A black Mesh crop top that stop just below her bindings, and a muted red long-sleeved crop top that was V-neck with Holes symmetrically placed up and down the sleeves. She put that on and then tied her shinobi headband around her neck because it seemed to fit better there. She gave herself a look up and down and liked this much still incorporated her signature red, but was much more professional and muted. The Pants had multiple secret compartments as well, which was a bonus. She looked at the other items in her bag and thanked the man silently before walking out. She grabbed her pack that was hanging in the drawer and shoved the bag of clothes into it. It was now hefty.

"Are you ready to go yet, kid?"Gemna said as he got up from the bench by the store entrance inside.

"Yes, I am." As they walked out in comfortable silence she brushed her fingers through her hair with her free hand wondering what she was forgetting. And then she remembered that she had team training at 11.

"Ah Genma-san, what time is it." She asked while staring at her empty wrist realizing she forgot her watch.

"10:45, why?" Genma said as he flicked his wristwatch. Glaring at it to read it.

"Oh God, I am going to miss team training! And I don't know how to get to field 7 from here!" Sakura said, freaking out. After all, she is Sakura. In her book, she is late because early is on time, and on time is late. Not only that but the walk to the store took her from the civilian district into the 6th district and she rarely was there.

"Kid, don't have a hernia, It is only like 10 minutes away from us, I will just walk you there," Gemna said with a laugh at her freak out. But who was he to judge her, when she was trying to get stronger.

As they walked they laughed more and more. They discussed her mission and also her training or lack thereof. Then Genma asked her something which made Sakura happy.

"Hey kid, I know that library like the back of my hand. How about I help you out with picking books out while using my jounin pass to get you higher-level things? And if you want I can help you out with studying or something." Genma said. Sakura scanned his face for any form of joking but there was just that cocky smirk.

"I mean if you want to I guess. I don't want to be a burden ya know?" Sakura said. She smiled at the man as they kept on walking. Genma's smirk faltered at the words "burden" but he kept up his smirk as best he could.

"You are a pretty cool kid. Never a burden to me, especially after today. And I don't think you will bother anything. I am pretty sure that you and I are the only ones that even know what a 'library' is. Plus it will keep me occupied. " Genma said while laughing slightly. It was most definitely true. Sakura was the only one that stopped by to get new books almost every day.

Sakura just simply thanked him for his time and said that she will see him later after training. As she came over the hill on the path that lead her to the training bridge and field that she and her team frequented, Naruto ran at full speed at her.

"Sakura-chan what is with your clothes?! Not that they look bad but just different. Do you wanna go get ramen later?" Naruto said with his lips moving at the speed of sound. This was exactly what sakura worried would happen. Talking about how she felt with her teammates seemed…embarrassing. Like the embarrassing feeling, you get when you are looking through old photos pre glow up ya know? She just continued with a Hey Naruto, to blow off his questions and they headed to the bridge together, where a very vengeful emo-looking teen sat. Sasuke was obviously annoyed by Naruto. But that's none of her concern. Her concern was to protect them, not gush love and affection every minute. That was what she had done previously. It was dumb. As they sat on the bridge she worked on meditating. She had read in the "Starters Guide to becoming a Medical Ninja" that meditating was important to increase reserves in order to make her more valuable. So she did just that. For three… grueling…hours. Who would have thought that meditating would cause her to sweat as much as she did? Lucky for her, her clothes hid sweat pretty well so she didn't look like a drenched mess. But with the end of those three hours came Kakashi. Kakashi had just given them some papers.

"Ano... Kakashi-Sensei… what kind of training is this?" Naruto asked the first to break the silence.

Alright guys that's the intro but just wait it gets better.

LEAVE ME SOME CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM PLEASE!

Also some notes:

The supplements that are in quotes are diet pills. The reason Sakura is so insecure in my story is due to the influence of her mother. Her mother is the idea of perfection among civilians basically and her image is one she upholds through her daughter as well. The parents are also absent not in the physical but more like in the emotional and mental. They feel like they have lost that connection to Sakura due to her taking the shinobi path rather than the civilian path. There will be more on it in the coming chapters. Just wanted to clear that up. (ALso I think I kinda wrote that in due to my own trauma so lets just realize that this is a TW!)

Also the reason kakashi and genma don't like eachother is because they felt competition over Minato. They were both young during the time and Minato was like the father figure for both of them. Genma thinks of kakashi like an entitled brat with special privileges, and kakashi doesn't like Genma because he feels that Genma was in the way between him an minato.

Another note: no Sakura hate. I am a firm believer in growth and through the whole Show she exhibited it. I will literally rock ur shit. Not only that but hating on her for having a realistic body rather than one that puts unfair standards upon children who watch the show pisses me off, so once again I will rock ur shit. So don't be dumb cunts and we won't have any issues.

Also this is for sure not going to have any relationships with major age can be insensitive to others and it grosses me out.

xx much love to all 3