JENNIE
We left Tel Aviv a few days later after Mary returned home. She recovered so fast, her body pumped on the yoga she did daily. Lisa asked her to promise to visit us in LA soon.
"Sure. Eve made me promise the same."
Eve and Jonathan would stay with Mary for a few more weeks. Lisa called Eve asking to let her know if Mary's state worsened. But we all hoped she would be fine, as she was taking her pills diligently.
Back in Kyiv, we rented an Airbnb apartment. I texted Kai to let him know I needed to grab my things, and he replied with a time I should be there. "I will be out," the message said.
Lisa stopped dead on the threshold of our apartment, boxes in her hands.
"It's so …" She stopped, looking around. "Homey."
"It was."
All my clothes and stuff I wanted to take to LA fit in two large suitcases. The rest of my things we packed into boxes, and my dad would pick them up later.
The doorbell rang. Lisa turned, questioning me. I shrugged and went to open the door.
Kai stood in the doorway, and a crutch supported his weight.
"Sorry, but I wanted to see you one last time before you left," he said.
He was standing on his legs much better than the last time I saw him, but his face—it was sad. There were dark circles under his eyes, few days stubble.
"I missed you," he said so quietly I was sure Lisa didn't hear it from the room she was in.
"Oh, Kai." I took his hand, but the truth was that in the last two weeks I didn't have a minute to think about him.
"I am not alone," I said.
Kai nodded.
"Do you want to meet her?" I asked.
He nodded again, his eyes never leaving my face.
Kai stepped in the hall of his apartment, then took off his shoes and jacket. I went in to call Lisa; she was wearing black jeans that hugged her slim legs and a black top that showed a sliver of her fit belly. She ran a hand with red nails through her hair; she was nervous.
"Hi, Kai," she greeted hesitantly.
"Hello."
They both looked at each other, eyeing each other up.
"So, you are the girlfriend," he said, his hard eyes scanning Lisa.
"Yes." She took a deep breath.
An awkward silence settled between us.
"We are almost finished packing. Fifteen minutes and we'll be out," I said, clearing my throat.
"I'll be in the kitchen," he retorted flatly. Kai was moving much better now, but he limped severely on his left leg, the side that had been hit.
I asked Lisa to finish packing. "I need to talk to him."
She frowned, glancing from me to where he'd disappeared to. "Sure, go."
Kai was making himself tea in the kitchen when I entered.
"Do you want a cup of tea?" he asked.
"I don't think that is a good idea," I said.
He shrugged. "She seems nice."
I perched on the chair near the kitchen table, the place on the windowsill was not mine anymore. Nothing here was.
"You know, sometimes I think to hell with all these future plans, this imaginary family. I want you back." There was calmness in his voice but such a regret in his eyes.
"You don't really think that."
He sighed, "Maybe, or maybe not."
"I am not sure your life can be fulfilled without a family."
"Are you happy, Jennie?"
"Yes, I am."
He nodded and took a sip of his tea, his eyes far away. "Good."
I wanted to help him, to shield him from the pain, but I couldn't really help since I was the one who had caused this pain.
Lisa stepped quietly into the kitchen.
"I'm ready," she announced. Lisa noticed the quietness between us and took a deep breath. "Kai, I am sorry for what happened."
"Thanks," he shrugged, a wall of calmness still on his face. But his heart, his dear to me heart, was breaking.
We put on our jackets and shoes and started hauling the suitcases out into the hall.
"Bye," Lisa murmured and was out the door.
I paused and hugged him.
"Bye, Kai," I whispered.
"I love you, Jennie." His voice was raw as he murmured into my hair. This was his goodbye.
Tears stung my eyes. I went out into the hall, never meeting his gaze.
Lisa saw my tears but was quiet all the way back in the taxi, my suitcases rumbling in the back.
"He still loves you." It was a statement. "He wants you back."
I took a deep breath. "He mistakes what he really wants."
"I am not sure he does."
"I hate hurting him," I said, a dull ache in my chest crushing me.
Lisa nodded, her eyes sympathetic, and took my hand.
Back in the apartment, I changed and was quiet for a while, preparing the tea in the kitchen.
"I have an idea on how to make your bad thoughts go away," Lisa told me. She was standing in her underwear at the threshold. "You can only watch," she added.
She perched on the stool in front of me, back pressed to the wall. She lowered her bra straps, eyes locked on mine. She touched her belly slowly, then the skin between her thighs. Next, she unhooked her bra, showing her full breasts. She caressed them.
"I see you are getting hungry." She smiled and moved her hand into her lace panties. Sucking in a breath, I moved closer but followed the rules of the game she was playing. Her hand moved in circles, and her hips rocked on that rickety chair.
"Oh, hell," I exclaimed, and I dropped to my knees, tugging on her panties, kissing her fingers and the flesh they were touching.