7th September, Wednesday

5:23 am

Nikita woke up with a pounding headache. She tried to push the pain away and go back to sleep but something was restraining her from turning on her side. She peeled her eyes open and startled herself when she didn't recognise where she was.

Michael was still holding her hand so he felt the jolt. He had dozed off a few hours ago so he shot right up. "Hey, hey it's okay. You're okay" He instantly went to comfort her but without getting in her space. That was still an unsure territory. He didn't know what her reaction would be to even seeing him again.

"Michael?" Nikita had just noticed him in the room. "Where-what? Am I in a hospital I-" As soon as the fact that she was in a hospital registered she remembered everything. The fight, Michael leaving, the panic attacks, and the throwing up which resulted in her calling for help. Calling him for help. Michael could tell that by her heart rate going up. The machine started beeping louder and faster "Hey, I need you to relax, okay? Breathe. You are okay. Everything is okay"

"The baby?" Nikita didn't care about any of that. She reached for her lower abdomen and clutched her hospital gown. She wasn't going to relax until she knew their baby was okay.

"Perfectly fine. Strong, steady heartbeat. They have been monitoring the baby as well" Michael was quick to comfort his wife. He was sure that had terrified her the most out of this whole experience. Thankfully, their child was apparently a fighter too.

"Oh, god" Nikita laid down on the bed and sighed in big relief. Now she can fucking breathe. That was a close one. Nikita wanted to cry. During those last few moments on that bathroom floor, she really thought she had lost everything.

Michael didn't know what to say or do. He had stopped holding her hand when she woke up and was now just standing awkwardly on the side of the bed. He wanted to hug her, kiss her, tell her how much he loved her. He was so happy she was finally awake.

Michael gave her a few moments to calm down. He wasn't going to say anything unless she wanted him to. Nikita laid and stared at the ceiling for quite a while trying to come to terms with what had happened. After a bit, she propped herself up with a pillow and finally took a good look at Michael.

He looked like a wreck. His clothes were all crinkled up, his hair was a mess and she hadn't even looked at his face properly. That was another story. He looked like he hadn't slept for days. Which led Nikita to question "How long have we been here?"

"They admitted you last night."

Oh. So it hadn't even been that long. Nikita saw the time on the clock on the wall. She had been here close to 10-11 hours. It felt like it was longer judging by Michael's appearance.

"What did the doctor say?" Maybe that was the reason why he looked so distressed.

"You had a panic attack and that triggered the sickness and then you passed out as a result of all of that. We'll be here for 2 nights so they can continue giving you fluids and monitor you. The baby too but they seem more worried about you" Michael felt so strange talking to her like that. Like it wasn't them but then Nikita did something. "I'm sorry for scaring you like that" She whispered. She wasn't sorry about her reaction. She was still really hurt but she should have had their baby in mind too. She should have talked to Michael in a more calm manner so that it didn't affect her so much.

"No" Michael was shocked to hear those words come out of her mouth. "No what- what are you talking about?" Nikita had nothing to apologize for. He should actually be thanking her for not throwing him out of the room the first second she woke up. "Don't you dare apologize. You wouldn't be here if I had done right by you"

Nikita opened her mouth and then closed it. She was definitely feeling calmer now. She was extremely hurt still and the only thing that could make it better was to learn the whole truth. "Sit" She invited him to sit back down on the chair. Michael carefully did so.

"I want to know everything. From start to finish. I won't interrupt you. I'll only ask questions if something is not clear and that's it" Nikita was now giving him the full opportunity to come out and say everything. Hopefully, he wasn't going to fuck it up.

"That's everything up until the point you found out… Again it was never my intention to hurt you so much. I thought by doing it this way I was protecting you. I now know it was wrong and I am so so sorry... This is all my fault and I don't want you to blame yourself even for one bit" It was hard to get through it all. Luckily no one came to interrupt them either. Nikita kept her word. She listened and didn't interrupt him either. It was good for her as well. She felt bad for not listening to him last night but again it was her finding out for the first time. It was her initial reaction and of course, it was going to be emotional.

"Okay. I..I can see how you thought you were helping me but in no universe Michael does hiding things from me equal to helping me or protecting me." Nikita had to get that clear. Maybe Michael couldn't think straight at that moment when everything was happening but he had to get that in his head. After all that was always the cause of all the problems in their relationship. They had to be open and honest with each other no matter what.

"Yeah, I know I fucked that up. I..I broke our promise…and…and I wish I knew how to fix it..you don't deserve that" Michael didn't want Nikita to feel bad or sorry for him, He put himself in that position but he couldn't help the tears.

Nikita reached for his hand and squeezed it as tight as she could. "I forgive you" She couldn't watch him beat himself up more and more. She could feel how truly guilty he felt. There was no point in beating him for it more. She knew he meant well and they were going to pass this too.

Michael shook his head and opened his mouth to protest but Nikita stopped him "If I say I'm forgiving you then I am. I also have to apologize for the things I said too" After hearing him out Nikita was no longer angry with him or even that upset. It was a unique circumstance with her being pregnant as well. Too many things happening all at once.

"It was all true so you don't-"

"No, it wasn't" Nikita wasn't going to let him dismiss the hurtful things she said.

In order for them to move on they had to get everything from last night sorted.

"Let's agree to this. It shouldn't have happened like that. We have to talk to each other. That was your mistake. Mine was that I didn't talk to you too after I found out." Nikita saw that Michael wanted to protest. "We are not going to compare them. It happened. I regretted yelling at you as soon as you left and you regretted not telling me as soon as I found out. There is nothing you and I can do about it except apologize and move on."

Michael listened to her carefully "Okay, but this all started because of me"

"So you want to take all the blame for it then? No. I want my Michael back. The one that works with me through this. The one that believes in me and my ability to take on shit. The one that tells me every single fucking thing about his day." Nikita just missed how they were before she went away. She had felt like things had been off for a while and now she knew why.

Michael took the courage to come closer to her "I will never ever let anything come between you and me. I don't how much my promises are worth anymore but-"

"Nothing's changed" It was all complicated but Nikita wasn't going to hold anything against Michael. His overprotectiveness just played him badly this time. In fact, after going through such a scary experience with her she was more than sure that he was never going to make that mistake again. She wasn't perfect. He wasn't perfect. But they loved each other beyond measure. They were going to get through this together.

Michael looked at those beautiful golden brown eyes with immense love and devotion. "This will never ever happen again. I love you so so so much and I'm sorry you had to go through all of that"

They were both crying now. Nikita reached her free hand to caress his cheek. Michael kissed her palm and held her hand there as if scared she was going to let go. "I love you too. I have complete faith in you. You know that, right?" Nikita leaned in and brushed her forehead against his. Michael closed his eyes and let himself cry. It was a mix of so many emotions. He still felt horrible that they were in a hospital room because of his actions. He was also so relieved and thankful for Nikita. His girl had the biggest heart there ever was.

They held each other for a long time after that. Neither wanted to let go. Nikita cradled his face and brushed her lips against his. Michael instantly kissed her. It felt like forever since he had kissed her. The most wonderful feeling in the world. In that moment Michael truly felt like it was going to get better. They were going to be okay.

When they pulled away Nikita whipped the remaining tears off his face "I can't look at you like that" It hurt her as much as it hurt him to see her so hurt and broken.

"I'll be okay. Now lay down because the nurses are going to come in and scold me if they see you sitting up so much" Nikita had to rest. They resolved the main issue now he could take care of her.

"Have they been in here a lot?" Nikita chuckled. Michael beamed when he heard her little laugh. He kissed her crown and answered "Through the night yes. They should be coming in soon now too. Do you want me to raise the bed a little?"

"Yeah, that'd be great" Michael immediately went to work. "Better?"

"Yes, thank you"

"Do you want anything? Water? I am not sure about food yet. We'll have to ask. I have some things from home too"

Michael had told Nikita about Sonya and Birkhoff too. Nikita was very thankful for the family she did have and was glad someone was there for Michael as well.

"What'd you get?"

"So.." Michael grabbed the duffle bag and placed it at the end of the bed. "I told her to bring you Ollie for comfort." Michael handed Nikita her favourite stuffed animal - a blue elephant named Ollie. Michael had gifted it to her after winning it at a fair on their honeymoon. Nikita had shared that she used to have a stuffed animal that she was very attached to as a child. It helped her get through the dark days. So Michael gave her Ollie to help him comfort her through all her nightmares, anxiety and all that was to come as a result of their pasts.

Nikita absolutely loved Ollie. She hardly slept without him. "No, you didn't!" She instantly grabbed the little blue elephant and settled herself back into bed, grinning from ear to ear. She was very attached to Ollie. Not only was it such a sweet gift from Michael but that elephant as crazy as it sounded really got her through some rough days and nights.

Michael knew he had to bring it to her. If she didn't accept his comfort she at least had Ollie. Luckily they could both comfort her now. "The rest is boring. Some clothes, toiletries. I also got your headphones in case you absolutely hate it here" Nikita hated hospitals passionately. Michael definitely needed to think of something to distract her while they were there. Music always calmed her down.

"Thank you….That bag is half empty. Please tell me you got something for yourself too" Michael had to take care of himself now. He was looking rough, to put it lightly.

"I'm fine I don't-"

"No, absolutely not. After the nurses come to check on me you are going home to take a shower and change" Nikita wanted to send him home straight away but that wasn't fair. He'd want to know how she was doing. She also would have preferred for him to stay and get some sleep too but he wouldn't have agreed to that at all. Plus she also didn't like the thought of being alone in that hospital room.

"No, no, no. I can't leave you here I-" Just thinking about it made him so nervous.

"You are not leaving me. You'll be gone for half an hour at most. You can check in with the nurses. If they say I'm well then you are going. You need to shower, change, eat." Nikita left no room for him to argue.

"Okay, but only if they say you are doing okay" Michael calculated in his mind that he could do all of that in 15 minutes or so he agreed.

"Of course"

8:30 am

After some time the nurses came and checked Nikita's vitals. She was doing great. They even gave her the green light to have some food. Nikita hated hospital food so she turned to Michael. He couldn't say no to her and it was also better to have a home-cooked meal right now. His trip back to the house was going to take a little longer than planned.

The nurses reassured Michael that there was nothing to worry about. They were going to be checking in on her often. Nikita also had some scheduled tests to do so they were going to take her with them anyway. After they left Michael tensed up. He dreaded that moment because it meant he had to leave.

"Come here" Nikita opened her arms for him. He went more than willingly. "You heard them. It's the perfect time to go now if they are taking me in for tests"

"I know, I know. Just call me, text me whatever it is if there is something if there is nothing and-"

"Okay, okay. If they don't get me soon I will call you. Now go, please" Michael hugged her tight for good measure, stole a few kisses and was sprinting down the corridor in no time.

10 am

Michael tried to get back to his love as soon as possible but he didn't have an easy task. He had to somehow get himself presentable and also cook something for Nikita. He apparently did pretty well though with his time since his wife was shocked when she saw him walking back into the room.

"It hasn't even been 2 hours" Nikita knew he was going to be rushing to get back to her but that was insane. She had only just gotten back to the room herself from doing tests and different scans.

"Hi, I am happy to see you too" Michael laughed and quickly put the bags down so he could check on her. "Are you okay? What did the nurses say?"

"They just brought me back to the room like 10 minutes ago. I'm fine. They cleared me of any diseases and complications. The doctor prescribed me some more prenatals to take and yeah everything's good. And…"

"And what?" Michael didn't like that pause.

"They asked if I wanted to see the baby and hear the heartbeat. I wanted to do it with you but they said they can't do it later so…" Nikita couldn't pass on the opportunity, especially after being so scared for their child in the last 24 hours.

"Jesus, Nikita. You nearly gave me a heart attack" Michael thought for a second something bad had happened.

"What?" Nikita laughed. She knew he wasn't going to be mad but still. He was worried about the baby too.

"I actually heard the heartbeat a few times while you were asleep. The nurses always checked it when they came to check on you" She didn't have to feel that bad about it. She also deserved to be reassured too that their baby was well and safe.

Nikita gasped "And you didn't tell me!"

"I forgot about it and they didn't do it for me. They were just checking it and I just happened to be in the room" He didn't want to admit it and ruin the mood but it was hard for him to hear his baby's heartbeat in that circumstance. Maybe that's why he didn't make it a big deal. There was no point dwelling on that now.

"Yeah, yeah" Nikita tried to push Michael off the hospital bed but with no success. Michael took her arms in his and held them tight. "So everything looks good then?"

"Yeah, and I even convinced them…" She untangled one of her arms from Michael's and reached for something on the table next to her "To print me a photo"

"No way!" Hospitals almost never did that if you weren't in the labour and delivery ward. "What did you tell them?"

"I just made them laugh with the jokes you deem as not funny. Turns out doctors and nurses love dark humour too. I even got myself special treatment because of it" Nikita was very proud of that fact.

"You are unbelievable" Michael shook his head and took the printed photo. Their baby was definitely a bigger dot now than last time. He still couldn't believe it. He was starting a family with Nikita. In 9 months they were going to hold their child in their hands and build a new even better life together. He had to focus on that now.

"I asked them to forward it to my doctor with all the tests so we can talk about it next time" Nikita had to be way more careful from now on.

"Yeah, that's a good idea. How do you feel now?" Michael asked again for the millionth time. He wasn't going to settle for just I'm fine.

"I think I'm okay. I am hungry though" Nikita wasn't interested in having a conversation about how she was doing. Physically she really did start to feel better but mentally she felt herself slowly going into a dark hole. She didn't want to think about that right now.

"Well, good thing I have a bag full of food then"

Michael quickly fed his wife and took care of her. Although Nikita was very hungry she got full pretty quickly and didn't end up eating much. Michael tried not to worry. It was just her body adjusting. They could try again later. After that, they settled into an easy silence that Michael eventually broke.

"Do you want to get some sleep? I can play something on the TV to help you relax." Nikita still looked pretty worn out. She had to rest as much as possible and Michael was sure a nap would help. That was if Nikita relaxed enough to go to sleep.

"I feel so gross" Nikita sighed. She wanted to go home and shower and sleep in her own bed. She was miserable in this room "Michael?"

"Yeah"

"Why can't we go home tonight? I want to" All the doctors and nurses said she was okay physically. She felt better too. Mentally though she didn't feel in a good space and staying at the hospital wasn't helping at all.

Michael knew that conversation was going to come at some point. He could tell Nikita was getting very unsettled by every passing hour."I know, but...If they want to keep you for another night there is probably a reason. We can leave first thing in the morning tomorrow" Michael came to sit on the bed and pulled her close. He also wanted to take her home where she would feel most comfortable but it wasn't up to him.

"We can call Sonya and Birkhoff to come visit" He hoped that would cheer her up a bit and provide a distraction. Sonya and Birkhoff were eager to see her. Michael spoke with them on the phone while he was out. He had to update them and reassure them that Nikita and the baby were well. They asked Michael to text them when they could come visit.

"They can come to see me at home" Nikita was determined. She was going to recover way faster at home than she was here. Michael knew that so she only had to convince him a bit more.

"I know you hate it here. I don't like it too, but I want you to be in the best hands possible and-"

"I will be in the best hands possible at home with you" No one can take better care of Nikita than Michael. She was more than comfortable to leave the hospital with him by her side.

"That is true in some cases but if something were to go wrong though there is no way for me to know" It wasn't like before when Nikita would have a visible injury and he would know how to take care of it. This was totally different.

"What is going to go wrong? They did a million tests and my results are great" There was no reason in Nikita's mind to stay. They lived close to the hospital so even if she happened to not feel well they could come back quickly.

Michael wasn't fully convinced still but he knew Nikita wasn't going to give up. They had to reach some sort of middle ground. "How about I talk to the doctor first, see what he thinks about discharging you today and we'll go from there. If he has no concerns whatsoever then we could talk about it more and decide"

"Why do we have to talk about it more?" If the doctor cleared her to go home then what was there to discuss.

"I have one condition. You are going to listen to everything I say and let me take care of you. Just because we are going to be home doesn't mean you have recovered. If I ask you to lay down you have to lay down. If-"

"Okay" Nikita didn't want to hear more about her tendency to be extremely stubborn especially when she wasn't well. "I get it and I will try my best"

Michael sighed and nodded. "I'll be right back"

Nikita watched him as he exited the room and went to find a doctor. She was relieved. There was no way they were going to keep her in here if she didn't want to. There was no reason to when they told her everything was fine. She could be home in a few hours and that gave her enough strength to fight her dark thoughts while Michael was gone.

Her husband took a bit too long though for her liking. More than half an hour had passed and there was still no sign of him. Nikita was just about to call him when she heard someone opening the door. "What took so long?"

"Why? Did something happen?" Michael didn't plan on being gone for so long but he had to get all the information.

"No, I just thought it was going to be faster. What is that?" Nikita noticed that Michael was carrying some papers and a few pamphlets.

"Oh, just some things so I can take care of you properly"

"Jesus, I'm not-" Nikita stopped mid-sentence when Michael crossed his arms and gave her an expectant look. She said she wouldn't fight him after all. "What did he say?"

"You are getting discharged today. They'll start on the papers right now and the nurses should be here in a bit to unhook you from the monitors" Michael had practically interrogated the poor doctor on every possible scenario that could happen. Luckily the medical professional had experience with worried loved ones so he happily answered all of Michael's questions.

Nikita happily squealed and made grabby hands for him. Michael went into her arms eagerly. He felt like he hadn't seen her happy and smiley in so long. "Thank you!" She turned and kissed his neck. Nikita knew that it took him some internal battles to agree to the idea and she appreciated it.

"I'll pack up. You have a new pair of clothes in the bag so when they unhook you we'll change you into those. I'll have to run in a bit to sign the paperwork. Will you be okay?" Michael had so much to think about now but his first priority was Nikita.

"Yes! Go do that now actually. We can shove everything in the bag and go" Nikita couldn't spend any more minutes in here.

"Okay, okay. Don't get too excited now. Just wait for me here. Don't get out of bed" Michael exited the room again. Nikita was left to sit on her own and on top of that she had to sit still. She would do that though if it meant going home.

Michael sorted everything out in no time. When he returned to the room he packed up, got his wife dressed, made sure they got everything and after that, they were on their way home. Michael knew he had made the right decision as soon as they were driving away from the hospital. Nikita fell asleep in seconds in the passenger seat. He smiled and thanked God again and again that she was okay.

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing!

I'm so sorry that I haven't gotten back to all of you but please know I appreciate it so much. I love reading your theories about the story! It's what keeps me going. You guys rock! xx