2019

It was a long ride from Washington DC to New York, at least it felt longer than it was. Fitz sat in the back of the town car staring at this brand new life he was now responsible for. His daughter was sleeping so peacefully in her car seat. She looked so tiny inside of it, all bundled up.

Fitz looked at her and thought back to the one night stand he had with Jacqui. He put his forehead into his hand and he began to tear up. "How could I have been so stupid?", he whispered, "so stupid and irresponsible."

He looked back up at Noelle. "Now you are forced into this world without a mother, without a…" He just shook his head. "This is a gift, Fitz." He told himself out loud. "She is a gift, embrace her, love her, and raise her."

The back of his finger, which seemed gigantic next to her tiny cheek, rubbed down her beautiful skin. "It's just us, daddy will always have you, I promise you Noelle." He thought about all the fake people he just left in Europe. He didn't want that for her, he wanted people to genuinely love her, not pretend because she was the big shot's daughter. He took a deep breath as the car stopped in front of his huge, never before seen condo building.

Fitz was pleased with security of the building. Fabian, the doorman, wouldn't even open the door until he heard his name and confirmed he was a resident. Fabian looked down at Noelle and back up at Fitz. "Congratulations, sir, she is beautiful."

Fitz thanked him and found his condo on the eighth floor. "This is our home, Noelle. I had it all decorated, and you're set with diapers and clothes for a few months", he chuckled. He opened the door, and he took a deep breath.

The 7 foot Christmas tree was decorated with colorful lights, musical lights that blinked with the rhythm, an angel up top, and Fitz lost himself for a moment in the peacefulness it brought to the huge living room.

It had just turned dark outside on this cold Christmas Eve, and along with the tree lights, his balcony door was also decorated with lights. That, combined with the lights of Manhattan, brought a calmness to the new father.

He picked Noelle up out of the car seat, and took off her coat, revealing the beautiful red velvet and white fur Christmas dress the nurses had gifted her with. He sat with her now in his arms, Noelle still sleeping, and looked at her spread out, her tiny head resting on his arm. He rubbed her stomach. Tight lipped with a smile, he began, "Twas the Night Before Christmas."

He stood up walking with her around the rest of condo holding the unicorn he had bought for her. He showed her the room that would be hers, equipped already with a crib, baby monitor, and changing table. Thinking of changing, Fitz said out loud, "Oh my, you must need a change." Before he went any further, he put her on the table.

It took him fifteen minutes to complete the whole process. He didn't realize he didn't need to take the whole dress off, but he did. She also had on a onesie under the dress and his big fingers didn't unsnap the buttons too well.

Getting the diaper on correctly, Fitz stared at it just to make sure. How was he going to do this? He carefully put the onesie back on, despite the dozens of pajamas he had ordered, and now Noelle was wide awake looking at him, still too new to the world to know what her father was doing.

The dress was back on her, and Fitz thought it best to take some pictures now before he messed up the next time he had to change her. Instead of showing her his room, he walked back out by the Christmas tree. He noticed the boxes of formula and bottles he had delivered to the place.

Cradled in her daddy's arms, looking up at him, he said to her, "I take it you're hungry?" He did the best he could with one hand, because he wasn't putting her down. Opening the box, getting the ready to feed formula, and pouring it into the bottle was a task, but he did it.

He finally sat now on the couch feeding his daughter who had fallen back asleep in his arms. He listened to the Christmas music from the lights, got lost in the blinking of them, and wondered if he was going to be alright.

He really didn't sleep at all again that Christmas Eve. He kept going by the balcony window with Noelle telling her he was looking for Santa. "If you're asleep, he will come, it doesn't matter if I'm not asleep. What presents do you think you'll get, Noelle?" With that, Fitz saw her eyes blink open again and stare at him. It's as if she was telling him that she had her present, being in her daddy's life and knowing no matter what she would be loved.

He finally put her back in the car seat, placed "UNI" next to her, and sat on the couch just watching her. He dozed off here and there, but he kept waking up to check on her. Finally, the sun rose on their first Christmas morning together. He left to get a bottle ready.

Fitz placed the car seat under the tree. Noelle was still in her Christmas dress, and he snapped a few pictures of her. It was the first pictures he took of her. He looked at the seat under the tree with her in it. "My only gift. Santa did come for me after all."

Still feeling the weight of guilt of Jacqui and what became of her and having Noelle, Fitz picked up his daughter to change her one more time before feeding her again. He noticed this was going to be a routine. He was in full blown daddy mode now, and he would forever embrace his title.

2019

"Move in with you? Like live together? Russ, you really think we are ready for that kind of commitment, I mean you couldn't even spend our first Christmas Day as a couple with me."

Russel rubbed his eyes. "Come on Liv, I apologized for that." He put his arm around her. "Look at this place, it's gorgeous, gigantic, a huge backyard, pool, hot tub, three bedrooms, three bathrooms, and it's fifteen minutes from your job. Just say yes."

Liv walked over to the big glass doors facing the backyard. There was an inground pool, and Russel knew Liv's love for swimming. She titled her head, closed her eyes. You don't love him Liv, this wouldn't be fair.

She felt his hands on her shoulders as he kissed her neck. "What more can I do to show how much I love you Liv, we can begin building out lives together." She turned to face him.

Her apartment was so lonely. She was moving up at work, becoming junior editor and soon to be chief editor. She could drown herself in work. She dropped her shoulders. "Ok, let's give it a try."

Russel gave a quick clap. "You won't regret it baby, I swear." He looked at his watch. "Shit, I told Gabe I would meet him at the office when I got back from the cruise. He's been waiting two hours. I'll be back, we'll have dinner. Fix the place to your liking."

Just like that, Russel was out the door. Liv crossed her arms and rolled her eyes. She was alone again, now it was just in a bigger house. Did she really think Russel would change? Her ringtone broke her thoughts, and she breathed a sigh of relief seeing it was work calling her.

"We have a new line coming in from Sable's Creations. Also, Lucy wrote the article from the Fashion Show in SoHo while you were on your cruise. Boss wants you to proofread before sending it out. Can you come in?" Harrison was speaking a mile a minute; Liv was trying to digest everything.

"Yeah, sure, I'll be there in.." she thought of what Russel said. "Fifteen minutes."

On her way to the office, Liv had no idea it would be the beginning of her never ending days at that office. Some of those days would turn into all nighters, just to have an excuse to stay away from Russel.

Did she just make the biggest mistake of her life or can her and Russel build a stable life together? Only time would tell and right now, she didn't have time for that. She had too much work to do and a point to prove. She was more than qualified to be Editor in Chief, and she had her eyes on the prize. She wanted to be in New York, and one day she had no doubt she would be.

Present Day

Fitz opened the door, letting Olivia in first with the sleeping Noelle. Right away the glow of Christmas lights caught Liv's eyes. The balcony doors were decorated with string lights along the edges. They were colorful and they had a rhythm of blinking to them. There was no Christmas tree up yet.

"Um, where should I?" Liv wasn't sure where to put Noelle.

"Oh, door on the left is her room. I'll be right in to get her changed." Fitz walked towards his room to put down and separate the bags.

Placing Noelle down softly on her cute little Elsa bed, Liv began to take her coat off slowly as not to wake her up. Once the pink unicorn coat was off, Noelle turned to her side. "UNI" she said, not realizing it was Olivia in the room.

Liv wasn't sure exactly what that meant. Noelle said again in a raspy little voice. "UNI please, daddy."

Fitz was standing in the doorway admiring the interaction. Olivia looked so concerned how she could help, but only Fitz and Tiffany knew what UNI was.

Liv looked up at the doorway. "I'm sorry I don't…"

Fitz smiled, picked up the unicorn and said "Meet UNI". He put it in Noelle's hands, and she pulled it close to her chest, falling back to sleep. Fitz began taking off her shoes and placing them under her bed.

Liv looked around the room. One wall had a gorgeous colorful rainbow painted on it. Every color of the spectrum glowing in the night light. On the wall across from Noelle's bed were two pictures. One was Fitz and her staring out at a clear blue beach. Whomever had taken the picture caught their profiles as Fitz was pointing to something out in the ocean, and Noelle was squinting to see.

The picture next to it was Noelle smiling looking up at her father. Her hands were together as if she was clapping, and Fitz held a happy birthday balloon. They both had duplicate smiles.

Right next to Noelle's bed, on the wall was a painting of a spectacular unicorn. Its front legs were up and there were clouds behind it in a blue sky. Beyond the clouds were the letters that spelled Noelle's name in rainbow colored letters. The whole room took Liv's breath away.

"There you go sweet pea, all ready for bed." Fitz said as he kissed her forehead. Do you need to go to the bathroom?" She shook her tired head, reached up for Liv's hand, and walked tiredly to the bathroom.

Liv looked at Fitz. "Is this ok?"

Fitz looked at her. Any other person would be praising Noelle for her every move, instead Liv was looking for approval to help his daughter. It was a gesture he would appreciate more than Liv would know.

"She trusts you enough, as long as you don't mind." Fitz smiled.

Back in the bedroom now, Noelle's head rested on the pillow. She smiled at Liv and said "Good night Ovivia."

"Good night Noelle." Liv said back. Noelle hugged UNI and Fitz covered her up.

He placed his hand on Liv's back to guide her out of the room, and she caught his smell of Creed. She had to close her eyes to keep her heart from beating faster.

Watching how loving, how tenderly he took care of Noelle took her to another place. He was such a pro at being a father.

"Have a seat." He pointed to the couch. "Care for some hot chocolate?"

"Sure", she smiled. "I'd love some."

He held up two small square boxes. "One of my colleagues makes hot coco bombs, they're delicious. I bought a dozen of them. Noelle loves the mint ones. Do you have a preference?"

He referred to his employees as colleagues, Liv never heard Russ do that. He asked her if she would like some hot chocolate, Russ would have told her to go make it herself and make some for him while she was at it. Liv smiled. "Whatever you choose is fine."

Walking now around the living room, staring at the lights of Manhattan with the Christmas lights blinking, Liv looked around. Three picture frames of Noelle were up on the wall across from the television. In all three, Noelle was in a red velvet, white fur dress.

One was clearly when she was a newborn. She was in a car seat under the tree, sound asleep. The next she was standing next to the tree, she didn't look more than one year old. She was pointing to a unicorn ornament. In the last one, she was holding a wrapped gift. It must have been when she was two. The dress was always a red velvet white fur dress and Liv wondered why.

"So, Fitzgerald Grant, you are quite the loving father."

"Thank you. It wasn't easy, but there isn't anything I wouldn't do for that little girl. She was a Christmas surprise and she continues to surprise me every day." He handed her the mug as they both sat on the couch. "Did you really enjoy today? I'm sorry if I guilted you into missing important work."

"I truly enjoyed myself. Missing important work? Not at all. I was going in just to go in and get out of that large penthouse. I bought it to spite myself, and I did just that. It's too big for me. I figured I would get more work done at the office, but then I met you." She side eyed him.

She had to be the very first person that had been with Fitz this long and hadn't asked about Noelle's mother. Fitz looked at her, anticipating the question, but it never came. She knew he was CEO of a major company, yet she didn't treat Noelle any differently.

Every time Fitz brought Noelle to the office, his staff would ooh and ahh over her. Some of them never even thought to ask her name. They just did it because she was the boss's daughter.

"I'm glad you came with us, so is Noelle, I'm sure she'll be up at the crack of dawn talking about it." He gave a pat to Olivia's hand and was pleasantly surprised when she held it there.

"It's been a long time since I had Christmas spirit, and you brought it out in me today, so thank you." Her thumb rubbed the top of his hand. "So, forgive me for asking, but…"

"Noelle's mother?" Fitz shook his head as if he knew. He sipped his hot chocolate. "Only four people know the story besides me, I don't share it with others."

"Oh," Liv looked away. "But that wasn't what I was going to ask."

He chuckled. "My apologies, it's usually the first question I get ."

"I was going to ask why she wears the same dress in each Christmas picture." Liv nodded up at the pictures.

Fitz looked at them. "That has something to do with her birth and since I opened my big mouth, if you want to know I can share it with you."

"I'd love to know. You are amazing with her though, she is smart, independent, and daddy's little girl."

Fitz took a hard swallow. "You may run, though after you hear the story." Fitz looked down. "It's still hard for me to forgive myself and I wonder if I am doing right by her every minute of every day."

He began the story of what happened between him and Jacqui and continued to when Jay told him about Noelle. Liv listened without judgement, tearing up a bit for him because of the guilt he had no right feeling. He was an amazing father, and his life was changed in a minute, yet he still accepted it.

"So one minute I'm thinking my DIOR suit was too much for a hospital, the next minute I'm thinking of a child I had no idea was mine. In minutes my life took a turn I couldn't imagine. I remembered staring at the Christmas tree in the hospital lobby and thinking this was it, this was the Christmas miracle I had always dreamed I'd get.

The nurses there took such good care of us and because I had absolutely nothing for her, they chipped in and bought her the dress she is wearing in the first picture. Every year we get a package from the hospital with a bigger sized dress. They remember the story, and send it with a card each year.

I send back gift cards as a sign of gratitude and one day I will be able to tell Noelle the story of why she is always in the same style dress." He took a deep breath and looked at Olivia.

Olivia really didn't know what to say. He was handed a newborn baby, his baby, and he just accepted his role. He made a life for her, takes time on the weekends to dedicate to her, and he is still so successful. Russ wanted no kids, it would ruin his career he said. Russ couldn't make time for her. "That's a beautiful story, sad in what happened to her mom, but just so beautiful how you embraced her."

Fitz nodded. "So here I am, a single father because I was so irresponsible and I think of how Noelle's life was affected by that mistake."

"Noelle wouldn't have a life if it wasn't for that mistake. I saw your interaction with her for a few hours. This was no mistake, this was meant to be."

"Thank you, so besides your job, coming to New York, what did you leave behind in LA?"

Liv took a deep breath. "I left the biggest mistake of my life." She began to tell Fitz about her two year relationship with Russel. She stopped right before Russel pushed her up against the wall. She didn't want him Fitz knowing that just yet, embarrassed she didn't see that side of him sooner. "I gave him two years of my life and if he wasn't willing to come here so I can begin my dream job, then it wasn't meant to be. I'm just sorry I didn't realize it sooner."

"I'm not." Fitz said and Liv looked at him confusingly. "I think it happened at the right time. We're here now, right?"

"Christmas Surprise." Liv said.

"Christmas surprise." Fitz repeated. He didn't know if she realized her body moved closer to him. Her hand was still holding his.

Fitz just sat, holding her hand back, watching the lights. He took a deep breath. Could he move on? She accepted Noelle, not like the others who were always so overbearing around her. He saw a connection; it was different than other interactions she's had with people.

Liv stood up heading to put her mug in the sink. Fitz stood up with her missing her hand being in his. "I'll get that Olivia."

She rubbed her eyes. She saw her bags over by the door. "I should.." She pointed to the door.

"Ok." Fitz walked her to the door not really wanting her to leave. "Look, tomorrow we're home all day. We are putting up our tree. Please feel free to join us, unless you have to work." He smirked.

"I'll text you in the morning." She went to leave and stopped. She faced him, staring at those amazing blue eyes. "Thank you for trusting me with your story about Noelle. That little girl loves her daddy beyond words."

"Good night, Livvie. Can I call you Livvie, two V's."

Liv laughed. "Has a nice ring to it." Her smile faded and they just looked at each other, both wanting to show some affection, but still hesitant.

"Oh and give me Russel's number" Fitz said. "I want to call him and thank him for being the world's biggest asshole."

"Good night Fitz." She really wanted to kiss him, but after his story, she didn't want to come off as too aggressive. Instead, she got right up to his lips. "I love the smell of Creed by the way." With that she turned and walked out.

Fitz closed the door and put his back up against it. He closed his eyes, calming his breathing. He rubbed his face down with his hand taking a deep breath and hoped she would join them putting up their tree.

For the first time in three years, Fitz was going to bed with a feeling of happiness, an anticipation that something may be starting, and he was liking it, very much.

He stopped in Noelle's room. She was sleeping, UNI cuddled close, and he kissed her forehead. "I love you, Noelle."

Noelle turned. "Where's Ovivia? You smile with Ovivia." She closed her eyes and went back to sleep.

She was so right. He did smile with Olivia. Even he could feel the difference in his mood. His guard was down, especially when they were with Noelle. That's when his guard was always on overdrive.

Fitz finally had a good night's sleep, something he had missed in so long. He felt his body being pushed by his shoulder. "Daddy, wake up, time for the tree."

Noelle was standing by her father's bed. Fitz scooped her up and pulled him into the bed with him, tickling her. With the sound of her giggles and squeals, he said "It's too early for the tree, the tree is still sleeping."

"Trees don't sleep." She laughed, pushing his hands away and breathing heavy from her laughter. She looked at him. "Pancakes?"

She pulled him out of bed. "Noelle, let daddy put on a shirt." She continued to pull him. "Noelle." But she didn't stop.

"Pancakes." She picked up his phone that was sitting on the counter. "Buzzing." She handed it to him.

He smiled. It was a text from Olivia. "You up because I am about to knock"

Noelle looked at the door hearing the knocking. "Who's it?" she yelled.

"Olivia."

"Noelle, wait." But she had pulled her stool over and opened the door to Fitz standing there blushing with no shirt on.

Looking down at Noelle, not yet seeing Fitz, Liv said "Good morning, Noelle, two L's. I brought you a rainbow bagel." She looked up at Fitz and she knows she stopped breathing. What a body this man had. This was the best decision I made, Liv thought as she stood frozen staring at this gorgeous man.

Liv had entered her penthouse after leaving Fitz. She pulled her phone out of her purse ready to give Harrison a call and noticed the missed call from Russel. Liv rolled her eyes. "Two months and he calls out of the blue." She plopped on her couch and her thumb froze above the call back button.

With curiosity getting the best of her, she dropped her finger, and his phone was ringing on the other end. "Hey baby." He picked up after the second ring.

"I'm not your baby, what do you want before I block your number for good."

"How you surviving the big city? Miss me yet?" He grew silent.

"You have five seconds then I'm hanging up."

"Check your mail Monday. Since the house was in both our names I need your signature to sell. I sent the paperwork; I just wanted you…"

"Fine, it'll be back in the mail on Monday. Goodbye Russel." She hung up and hit block on his number.

She thought of Fitz, how in the few hours she spent with him she was treated so much better by him than two years with Russ.

Putting her hand to her nose, she smelled his Creed. It brought a chill up her spine. She took a deep breath and headed to the shower.

It was in the shower she thought about his invite to do the tree. What if she didn't go and he showed up with that beautiful child and noticed she had nothing ready at her place for Christmas? Letting the water beat down on her, Liv made her decision, she would go and help with their tree.

Fitz felt comfortable sharing his story with her. She couldn't imagine being told the day your child is born that it was his child. Her hair, her clothes, her bedtime routine, Fitz had it all down.

Now, laying in bed, she stared at the ceiling. "Livvie" she heard his deep voice say the name and she loved it. It was much better than "baby" which is what Russ called her. She closed her eyes, thinking about bringing bagels to them and decorating their tree. She fell asleep to the thought of finally being happy on Christmas after two miserable ones with Russ.

"A rainbow bagel." Much like she did to Fitz moments ago, Noelle pulled Olivia into the kitchen. Noelle couldn't see that Liv did not take her eyes off Fitz.

"Hi" he said. "Sorry about no shirt, Noelle dragged me out here. Thank you for the bagels."

"Hi." She said back, no worries about the no shirt, it's" she paused "eye candy." She covered her smiling lips with her hand.

"Candy too?" Noelle said as she climbed up on the chair.

"No, not candy Noelle." Fitz said looking at Liv.

Sorry, she mouthed. Fitz looked down, then back up again. "I'm just going to get a shirt. There is butter, cream cheese, and orange juice in the fridge help yourself." Fitz left Noelle to Liv's company.

"Ovivia tree today." Noelle said pulling her rainbow bagel out of the bag and looked at it with wide eyes.

"Yes, that's exciting." Liv pulled out something from the other bag she was carrying. "I thought you may like these, Noelle." Liv was holding up Aroma360 Rainbow Unicorn earmuffs. "These will go well with your mittens."

"Wow, Ovivia." Noelle jumped off the chair. "Daddy, Ovivia bought me ear mittens, unicorn rainbow."

Fitz came out carrying Noelle. "Thank you Livvie. Go ahead, put them on, Noelle."

They were almost as big as her head as they puffed out at the ears. Noelle felt the tip of the "horn" on top. She climbed back up on the chair and bit into her rainbow bagel. "Tree next, daddy."

"Tree next, sweetie, after we eat." He pulled Olivia behind Noelle and kissed her forehead. "That was so nice of you, seriously." He walked away, getting the orange juice.

Liv looked around the well lighted kitchen, trying to keep her balance after feeling his soft lips. Her fingers rested on the spot he kissed her, and her heart melted a bit. She could get used to this, she thought. She watched as Noelle was taking little bites from the bagel kicking her feet that didn't reach the floor.

Noelle smiled a big smile at Olivia. She had her daddy, her new friend Ovivia, and her new favorite gift, her unicorn earmuffs. "Christmas soon, daddy." Noelle was the happiest girl knowing Ovivia would decorate their tree with them.

"Yes, and Olivia will decorate our tree with us, that's a great Christmas surprise." Not knowing their hearts were beating in sync with the fast rhythm, they smiled at each other from across the kitchen.

"The best surprise." Noelle threw her arms around Olivia as she reached for her own bagel. "You make daddy smile." Noelle whispered in her ear.

It was going to be a great day; Liv could just feel it as the three of them were now at the table anticipating the decorating and more Christmas surprises that would come for them all.