I've got my money on things going badly
Got a history of stories ending sadly
Still hoping that the fire won't burn me
Just one time, just one time

Piper crept into Alex's room. In case anything went horribly wrong, she wanted to see her for one last time. To explain, if she could even hear her, why she was doing it. The chair next to Alex's bed was empty, and although Piper was glad of that - it wasn't exactly the kind of thing she wanted to say with anybody listening - she was also annoyed that she'd been left alone.

She sat down quietly in the half-light and took hold of Alex's hand. Her thumb brushed against the back of it. Alex didn't stir.

"I'm not sure how we ended up here," Piper said, sighing as she leaned against the bed. "But it's okay. I'm going to sort it out. Once you're awake, it'll be a different world." Piper looked at all the monitors. "Well, maybe not different," she whispered. "But a little better, maybe?"

She waited for a moment, as if Alex was going to respond, and then nodded to herself. "Definitely better. Hm. You look weird without your glasses." Piper leaned over, gently raking her fingers through Alex's hair. She trailed a finger down Alex's nose, softly booping the end. "Maybe if I pretend really hard, I can make myself believe we're eighteen and sharing our first apartment, and you're just sleeping." Piper closed her eyes. "I like that."

She was about to drift off when she heard her own name being called out. Her head snapped up. "Oh. Hi, Diane. How has she been?"

She hoped the judgement wasn't evident in her voice.

"I'm glad you're here," Diane said, sounding brighter. "I was just speaking to her consultant. He explained it all to me. What's happened. Inside, I mean. What's going to happen as she recovers."

"And?" Piper asked tentatively, not daring to get her hopes up.

"He said she's still weak," Diane went on. "Because of the blood loss. But the wound is more her clavicle than chest. It missed her vital organs and arteries." She stopped to look heavenward before she continued, and clasped a hand to her own chest. "He said something about nicking a vein, but she's going to be okay. They're going to try and reduce the sedation soon."

Piper's mouth opened by a fraction in shock.

Diane nodded. "It's going to be a rough road ahead of us. She might not be able to use her arm very well, but there's therapy. Do you understand what I'm saying, Piper? She's going to be okay. She's going to be alright."

Piper blinked at Diane, saying nothing for a moment. And hen she burst into tears.

"Oh, sweetie," Diane said, rushing over to her and pulling her into a bear hug. Piper was overwhelmed by the flowery, powdery scent of Diane's perfume as she held her close. She felt gentle hands brushing away the tears. "It's alright. Everything's going to be alright."

Piper didn't know what she felt. Relief, she supposed, whatever that felt like these days. She pawed at her cheeks, pulling away.

"Yeah. Diane…if she wakes up and I'm not here, will you tell her I was?" Piper asked.

Diane's forehead creased. "Of course. But you don't have to leave."

Piper felt that Diane really didn't want her to leave. But she had to. She had things to do. Things that were bigger than being there when Alex woke up, somehow.

"I just have to sort something," Piper said. "But I'll be back as soon as I can. I promise." She dropped a quick kiss on Alex's forehead, lingering to make it last. And then she picked up her bag, and disappeared down the hall.

Joel looked at his phone again for what seemed like the hundredth time that day. Still nothing. That wasn't unusual in itself - sadly - but he just wanted one call. Just to hear her voice and know that she was okay.

He caved and punched in her number again.

"Nicky, will you call me?" Joel said to Nicky's voicemail for not the first time that day. "I'm…" he paused. "I'm worried about you."

If nothing else, at the end of all this, he could say that he tried.

Piper looked up at the gym. It looked so…ordinary. Dilapidated, even. The sign was hanging off the side of the building and the fluorescent light flickered above her. Despite the chill in the air, sweat prickled underneath her arms. If she was going to do this, she had to commit. No half-assing it; no chickening out.

Piper shook herself off. She squared up to the door, as if that was Vee, and prepared to knock.

Knock? Piper dropped her hand. Knocking didn't make much of an entrance. Maybe she should burst in, tears already streaming? She blinked, but her eyes were dry. She was all cried out. Numb.

Don't overcomplicate it, she told herself. Keep it simple.

The plan was simple.

Go to Vee. Tell her what happened - the version she wanted her to know, anyway - and appeal to her. Beg, if she had to. Hand her the gun, wait until her fingerprints were on every square inch of it, and then make an anonymous report to the police.

It had to work.

Nicky held up the baggie.

Marka was out at some fancy dinner. She'd pinned a note with money and a takeout menu to the front door, but that was all the goodbye she'd offered. With just Nicky home, the house was quiet. Too quiet. The obnoxiously large clock sounded like soldiers marching as it ticked on, checking off seconds that felt like minutes. Marka had bought it from an estate sale some years ago. Nicky had never liked it, but her opinion didn't count for much.

She didn't seem to count for much lately.

You're a liability was on a loop in her head, and she just wanted to shut it up.

Powder trickled down the plastic as if the baggie were a snowglobe - and God, was it beautiful. Fantasies were one thing, and Nicky had spent the latter half of the afternoon thinking about Lorna's face, but this? This was the real deal. And it was right there for the taking.

She took a deep breath, drinking in the silence, and pressed the baggie to her lips. Red's words rang in her head - think of Alex. But Alex was hooked up to a thousand different machines and off her head on painkillers, the real stuff, the kind that made it feel like cotton candy was flowing through her veins, and too out of it to even appreciate it.

"Beautiful," Nicky said wistfully. She shook it again just to watch it fall. "Just fucking beautiful."

"Lorna, please," Joel said, exasperation seeping into his tone. He kept his voice down, aware that behind the counter, Red was straining to listen to their conversation. If he could have met anywhere else, he would have - but Lorna insisted that the only thing that cured a hangover was a pastry from Red, and besides, she didn't understand the big deal. Nicky always disappeared.

"Listen, I wish I could help but I haven't seen her," Lorna said, one hand to her aching head. "I've barely left the house since that party. Talk about a hangover." She winced and rubbed her head again. "Why? What has she been doing now?"

Joel stared at her. Talk, talk, talk. Like she had no idea what she'd done to Nicky. Like she had no idea that she'd been so casually cruel for months, stringing her along until she didn't need her anymore.

"What? Do I have something in my teeth?" Lorna asked, pulling out a small compact from her purse and squinting at her reflection with contempt. Her brow furrowed. "God, I need to hydrate. Look at these lines. You know, they go away when I drink more, but then I have to pee every five minutes-"

"Can't you just call her?" Joel said finally. "She'll probably pick up if she sees it's you calling. She's…" he cleared his throat. "She's just blanking all my calls."

"I will, but take a chill pill, will you?" Lorna laughed. Her eyes sparkled. When she spoke of Nicky, there was warmth in her tone. She nodded at Joel. "She's probably sleeping it off somewhere. God, if I know Nicky, she's sleeping it off by sleeping with someone else. She's a big girl, you know. She can take care of herself."

"You know what?"

Lorna looked up at Joel as she snapped the compact shut. "What?"

"Go fuck yourself, Lorna."

The clock ticked in Storky's, and whilst every other employee was counting down the hours until their shift ended, Taystee remained where she was an hour after hers already had.

"I didn't order this," the customer standing in front of the counter complained. "I ordered small fries and a milkshake. This is Stork Bites, my kid won't-"

Taystee barely heard her. She looked up, watching her lips move, the complaint bouncing around in her head like the DVD logo on an old television.

"Sorry about the mix up," the store manager said, cutting in front of Taystee. "I'll get your order and bring it over."

Taystee had her eyes on the clock. She'd planned to leave on time - but Piper's words echoed in her head as she had one hand on the door.

"Go home," her manager said, snatching the order receipt from Taystee's hand. "This is the third wrong order tonight. I don't have to authorise overtime, you know."

"I'm sorry," Taystee said, blinking hard to clear the mist from her vision. And she was. Yet she couldn't seem to get that to register on her face; a blank expression remained, save for the slight biting of her lower lip.

"You said," the manager replied, not looking up from the food. "But sorry doesn't refund the customer, does it? You're costing us money tonight."

Another few seconds ticked by on the clock. "I've just...got a lot on my mind right now."

"Well our customers have a lot of money in their pockets that they aren't going to spend here if the idiot behind the counter can't get a simple order right."

Taystee inhaled deeply. "I'm sorry—"

"Don't apologise to him. Are you gonna let him talk to you that way, Taystee girl?"

"Vee," Taystee stammered, her head snapping up. "What are you doing here?"

She was supposed to be here.

Nate said she would be here. Traitor.

Piper looked around wildly, but everything had been cleaned out. In a hurry, by the looks of it. Papers scattered the floor. Even the stupid desk Nate had been sitting at all those weeks ago - gone.

The simple plan had turned into something a little more…complicated. She looked around at everything. Could she still plant it here somehow?

"Come on," Piper murmured, kneeling and turning over the papers. Just junk mail, by the looks of it. And then she saw it. "Jackpot."

A vent, only secured to the wall with one screw. If there was any hope, this was it. Piper crawled over to it, not caring that dust clung to her knees, and flicked it upwards. It swung open, revealing a stack of cash that Piper presumed to be at least five hundred dollars, multiple baggies containing God knew what, and various documents.

Piper leaned against the wall, her breathing uneven. Trembling fingers reached into her purse. Before she could find what she was looking for, her phone started to buzz. With a little huff she pulled it out.

"What do you want, Nate?" she said immediately after answering. "I don't really have time to chat to snakes." She spat out the last word.

"Snake?" Nate said. "I'm trying to warn you here. I got a real weird message from Taystee; she said something about the plan not going right. It was a voice note. I thought I heard Vee in the background…"

"Vee?" Piper straightened. "You said she was meeting RJ today. That she'd be gone all day."

"Well, she usually is."

"But not today?"

"Apparently not."

Piper swallowed hard. "Okay. Thanks, Nate."

"Piper, wait, you're not—"

She threw the phone into the abyss of her purse, ignoring as Nate's voice echoed in the darkness still.

She had a job to do.

She fumbled for a moment, icy skin barely registering as it brushed against old receipts, a spare tampon and a hairbrush in desperate need of a clean. Despite the sheen of sweat on her brow, she shivered. But no matter how deep she rummaged, her fingers didn't come across what she was looking for. No gun. Where the fuck was it?

"Looking for something?"

Piper whipped round. "Vee."

A/N:

Long time no see! I told you I intend to finish this fic, so if you're still here, thanks for sticking with me. I really didn't mean to end this one on another cliffhanger, but accidentally stumbled into it...

Since I last updated and said I was obsessed with the new Taylor Swift album, she's released another one, lol. Obsessed with Barbie (I did not think that movie was going to make me cry!) and that's about it with me...hope you're all well.

Star xo