A shout, a shove and a push.
Strong words, fast movements, all are forceful.
A separation, a tight embrace, flowing liquid.
So warm, so cold, oh memories.
But then, things crash, world ends, reality shatters, meanings are lost and may never be found.
They feel … lacking, not full, unsatisfied.
There is an emptiness, a void: distance has been made.
Isolated, right within the embrace of dozens of people.
Alone, in the middle of a pile of crying and sobbing mass.
Unacknowledged, though all eyes, all ears, and all hearts are directed to nowhere but them.
Like a drunk man when returning to soberness, the unfamiliar clear world feels more distorted than the usual dizzy land where they hail from.
Like a person who has just awakened from too much sleep, the dawn of realization come slower than all should.
And in this exact moment of nauseously clean, clear and undeniable rationality that they come to learn what is feeling so wrong:
There is no longer a 'they', he is utterly alone now.
That fact drains all the non -existing energy within Natsuki Subaru and puts him into a deep sleep for the first time in forever.
The elder slumbers in a dreamless sleep. His first true rest in a human sense in an eternity, yet it holds no specialty.
It is just sleep.
Perhaps, for that the waking moments prior to this state was more confusing than all dreams could be, and for that the sudden crash and emptiness felt right before the fainting was more dreadful than all nightmares could be, anything his tired brain can generate to either torment or perplex him will simply pale in comparison, and it naturally just decides to use the energy on something more productive.
Perhaps it is all just overthinking.
But there is a reason why people still do it: reality is often odder than fantasy, lies need to convince, truths are simply true.
Back to the matter, the truth is that Natsuki Subaru is sleeping without nightmares. And although such an occurrence is not even a rarity among normal people. 'Normalcy' and 'Natsuki Subaru' are not good friends.
Those that know, would understand that him having a peaceful night feels closer to a lie than something real.
And although 'these people' that know about his regular nightmares only boil down to an adorable spirit, maybe one creepy mage, a silver haired half-elf and her other personality, and one other person, it is still a sight to behold.
It is strange, so utterly unthinkable that he could be this relaxed. Before that one day, such a thing would have felt impossible, yet gladly accepted. But right now, such tranquility is certainly an actual impossibility, still, it is happening, yet, it can not be welcomed.
Because right now, at this very moment, their friend, their hero, the one whom they have longed to meet, wished to greet, desired to reach for so so long is sleeping in complete serenity, hand-in-hand with their sworn enemy and the one truly unforgivable.
Screw the rule of truth, ignore reality even, they have seen it and still they could not accept, they have tested it and yet they refuse to believe.
Because just removing him from her, even for a slightest moment, in that single instance of no-contact, he would shake and turn, sweat and cry, his face would grimace tightly as if experiencing the highest level of pain, his breath would hasten as if oxygen were no longer enough for him to live.
And the worst part is that she too has the same symptoms. And although seeing her being in any flavors of pain please them greatly, the fact that she shares even one single thing with their friend, disgusts them to no end. And side by side, looking at both of them, her suffering seems to be at the cost of making him suffer as well, and that line of thought does not sit well with any of them.
And so, more often than not, one of them would simply be unable to take it any longer and reconnect the hands and bring both of them back to peace.
Many times, they have tried this, every times it played out the same, and yet they simply could never except it: the fact that their greatest friend is now dependent on their greatest enemy.
The best they could do is separating them with a hanging curtain splitting the bed perfectly in half with only their hands connected right in the middle. So that he could not see her, so that they could not see her, so that the two of them wouldn't slowly reaching for the other into an embrace again.
The last time it happened, the room almost froze.
An entire day has passed and there has been no changes among the slumbered duos.
They have dreamt about this day for long, and in their dream, it always ends with a tearful but blissful reunion.
And although they really did reunite, and that they have cried a lot, him not really being there made it all feel incomplete and none were satisfied.
And even though just seeing him safe and sound has already been enough for most of them, and that the idea of what is to come delight them all, her appearance and what they have found right after that balance all the happiness and joy around, soiling everyone's mood and plunging the once so desired reunion down to confusion and restlessness.
'If only things were to be perfect' – they would often think.
And yet later, that they know that any reality where he does return safe and sound is already perfect, and that still they have such a thought, they feel disgusted at themselves. As if they are expecting him to take care of Her all by himself, while back then, they themselves had not been able to even prevent him from being taken away.
The Emilia camp is not alone in this, however.
Throughout the day the room seems to fill itself up with more and more people.
The announcement of his comeback has spread far and wide and at great speed.
Many have come to visit with an intention to celebrate and congratulate, with gifts and pleasantries, yet one look at the room with a bed separated in half by a hanging curtain and first earns confusion, then surprise, then the return of memories and hatred, and finally questioning, some have led to shouting and accusing even.
The idea of killing her right then and there has been passed around all day, by many of their guests and some of their own.
As if they haven't already tried.
They wonder, truly, if there ever come a day when he himself stands in between her and them, at the wrong end of the blade which they raise against her.
There is nothing to believe that him and her are so close as such, nothing to even believe the circumstance they are currently in not merely just a consequence of some kind of curse, and that their embrace hasn't come from anywhere close to the heart but from sheer physical or magical requirement.
Still, simply a suggestion of such a scenario has made a half-elf, a spirit and an oni weep and scream in defiance, earned a hateful glare from the other oni and a look of fear from one young boy.
Many who come to visit the man do not leave. They have wanted to stay by him for the moment of his awakening, the moment of a true reunion. And Her being right there gives them more than enough reason to remain.
And so, the next moment Subaru opens his eyes, he will see many cherished old faces but that time will still remain far from being a perfect reunion. For although he is more than welcomed, they are distanced.
But no matter what, one thing he does know, the future is not to be taken on by anyone alone.
This is their story.