MONDAY
Deeks called JD Sunday night and told him the papers were signed. JD had someone there within the hour to collect them. The real waiting starts today. JD filed the petition for an emergency hearing first thing Monday morning when the clerk opened. Deeks checks his phone constantly waiting on news.
Kensi is a roller coaster, talking about baby plans one minute and then saying she doesn't want to jinx it by talking about baby plans and refusing to talk about it the next. It's giving Deeks whiplash, but he has no more productive way to deal with the waiting, so he just rides the tracks with her.
To kill time while they wait for news, they talk a walk around the hospital grounds. Kensi's abdomen is healing well, and with minimal medication she is able to walk the path with him. They hold hands, but walk in silence, both afraid to tempt fate by talking about the adoption before they hear anything. It's as if their superstition is rewarded when Deeks finally gets a text from JD mid-afternoon.
JD: Emergency hearing granted. Tomorrow, 3PM.
He reads it to her, even turning the phone to face her so she can read it herself. The smile spreads across her face and past her eyes until she is almost entirely a beam of light. He's so excited, and grateful. First he takes in the sight of her, then he takes her in his arms. He wants to squeeze her and spin her and laugh and cry, but he knows that is ill-advised in her current condition and their current location. He holds her. He holds her and it is enough - just this chance to let himself dream one step beyond where they are now.
By the time they are back close to her room, his gregarious spirit has gotten the best of him. He is talking with his hands and going on about things they would need to change if a baby is going to move in with them soon. It actually takes a step or two before he realizes she isn't still beside him. He looks back over his shoulder, and she's stopped, one hand holding her head and one holding the wall. She's unsteady on her feet, and he's beside her again in an instant, and arm around her waist for support.
"No, I'm ok. I'm ok," she insists, but he can tell she isn't.
"Come on, let's get you sitting down."
He holds her arm, and in her determination to show him she's fine, she pulls her arm away. The momentum of her action makes her lose her balance, and she almost falls over if not for his reflexes.
"Let's not try that again," he tells her with some frustration at her stubborn streak. She gives in with a groan and lets him lead her back the rest of the way to her room. He gets her settled back in her bed, worried.
"I'm sure I just overdid it with the walk. It's nothing."
When the medical staff comes by for rounds, Kensi doesn't mention it. Deeks usually clears the room and lets them work in peace, but he stayed this time having a feeling that she was going to omit whatever happened when talking to her doctors. When he does mention it, she is so angry. She insists everything is fine, but he isn't taking any chances, and now neither is her medical team. They order another round of scans and restrict her walking and general activity.
He knows he's in trouble, so he orders bulgogi and has dinner laid out in the room when they bring her back. Her annoyance is obvious, but her hunger wins out. They are finishing up dinner where her doctor returns.
"It's probably nothing. Maybe just overdid it with the walking," he postulates, ignoring the look Kensi gives Deeks. "But the pain and dizziness can be indicators of other issues. There's a slight uptick in pressure we aren't thrilled with and need to monitor. We're going to restrict you to this floor for your adventures and redo the scan in twenty-four hours. If there are no other episodes, we'll try to get you discharged on Wednesday.
"Wednesday!?" Kensi half questions, half exclaims, and the reason hits Deeks immediately. If Kensi is stuck in the hospital tomorrow afternoon, she can't go to the hearing. As soon as he makes the connection, he knows bulgogi isn't nearly enough to get him out of this trouble. He prays nothing is wrong, but if nothing's wrong and he got her an extra night in the hospital from an over-abundance of his caution, she may kill him.
TUESDAY
Deeks was running late and barely had time to get home, shower, change, and meet JD at the courthouse. Kensi's nervousness and inability to attend the proceedings left her full of undirected energy. She was doling out advice as though Deeks had never been in a courtroom before – how to act, how to dress, leaving his wit at the door, being respectful. She made him crazy, but he understood.
"It's just our first chance. If it isn't today, it will be another day. If it isn't this little girl, there will be another child."
"What?" She barked back at him. "You think I'm nervous."
"You are nervous. I am nervous. It's ok. I'm just reminding you that if something doesn't go our way today, we'll have lots more chances."
"You don't know that," she tells him, and he can see just how worried she is.
"I know this – that we love each other, and that no matter what happens today, we will be ok."
He reaches in, his fingers trailing down her jaw line. He pulls her to him, and hugs her head to his chest, kissing the top before letting go.
"I have to go get ready."
He agonized over what to wear, going with suit pants and a button down but foregoing the tie and jacket. He wasn't the lawyer this time, and it made him more vulnerable than he cared to admit. He suddenly wondered if it was like for his clients back in his active lawyer days – how scared they were to put their lives in his hands.
JD meets him in the lobby.
"What do you know about this judge?" Deeks asks him.
"She'll be tough but fair. She is as concerned about a guardian's temperament as their credentials - may try to get a rise out of you and see what happens. Let me by the lawyer today. Don't take any bait. We should be fine."
Deeks doesn't love the 'should be' in the last statement, but knows that's all anyone can promise going into something like this. They head inside. They are a few minutes early and wait for their spot on the docket. Their case is called into session with the family court judge, and when the 'All Rise' is called, Deeks can't escape admitting to himself how invested he is, how much he wants to give that little girl a home.
He stands as a Pavlovian response to the bailiff and accepts an encouraging smile from JD. He hears the door to the courtroom open behind him, and can't help but look over his shoulder. He feels warmth in his chest when he sees Sam, Callen, and Fatima step inside and take a seat behind him. Sam gives him one nod for strength, Callen gives him one crooked smile for encouragement, and Fatima puts her hand on her heart to tell him she's with him.
The judge moves quickly into the substance of the hearing, and the speed makes Deeks head spin. He's never struggled to track a proceeding before. He's glad he let JD carry the lion's share. His mind catches up quickly when he hears the judge ask a very direct question.
"I only see one petitioner here today. Could Ms. Blye not fit it into her schedule?"
JD feels Deeks tense at the judge's tone, and puts a hand on Deeks' shoulder letting him know that he'll answer that one himself. And to not rise to the bait.
"Ms. Blye is in the hospital, your honor, and her medical team has delayed her discharge until tonight or tomorrow morning."
"I see," the judge says, but Deeks doesn't think she does. "Are you certain that you're in a position to take on custody of the minor child given other life factors?" the judge asks Deeks. Deeks sees the meaning behind the question.
Deeks stands without being told to, looking at the ground and gathering his thoughts and looking back at the bench. "My wife was injured in the line of duty last Friday protecting that baby from people who were going to kill her and her biological mother. And that was before we had any idea that this," he says gesturing around the courtroom, "was a possibility. That's the kind of woman she is, the kind of agent she is, and the kind of commitment that she, that we both, bring before you today. We will give this child a good home. More love than they could imagine. Everything that's in our power to provide."
Deeks sits while the judge reviews the rest of the paperwork. There are more questions, more pauses. With an emergency petition, often the judge has to do some homework right there in front of the court. Deeks has no idea how much time has passed when the judge starts to run through her final set of questions.
"The biological father?" the judge questions.
"Deceased," JD answers. The details are in the file. He isn't saying more than required.
"And the biological mother?"
"Ms. Williams is in support of the action."
The judge looks at them skeptically. "Being here would show support."
"Mr. Deeks has been known by Ms. Williams for fifteen years. She requested that he and his wife adopt the minor child in the absence of any other close family, and signed the papers required to sever her parental rights in the event that this petition is approved."
The judge flips more papers.
"And the State of California?" she asks the other table.
"We have no objection to the petition."
Deeks' eyes are tracking from the State Attorney to the judge and back waiting to see what happens next. There is more paper rustling and finally the judge gathers up the stack and organizes them back into the folder.
"Very well. The petition for adoption is approved. The State of California has forty-eight hours to contact Mr. Deeks and Ms. Blye to arrange a transfer of custody. Best of luck to you and your wife, Mr. Deeks. Congratulations." The gavel bangs. Everyone stands. The bailiff declares court adjourned.
Deeks had used the term 'transfer of custody' a hundred times, but never with this meaning.
His head starts to swivel, afraid he's misheard, but JD is smiling and shaking his hand and his friends are descending on him looking as happy as he's ever seen them. He gets a hug from Callen, and that's enough to convince him it's real. The attorney for the state approaches, and he breaks away and clears his throat.
"Thank you," Deeks tells them. Deeks wants to thank everyone.
"That's a lucky child. Every time a child is placed in a good home, we're happy."
The man next to the state's attorney hands Deeks a business card. "I'm Jacob Atwater. I'm the child's case worker. Let's plan on the transfer of custody mid-morning on Thursday. If there are any issues with your wife's health, or anything else, give me a call and we'll work it out. We'll provide your attorney all the details."
"Yeah, thanks. Thank you," Deeks reaches out and shakes his hand. "And she's ok?" he asks tentatively. "She's good where she is?"
The case worker gets a sympathetic smile. "She's in great hands, with a family that handles emergency short term infant placement for us on a regular basis." Deeks nods, and the case worker turns and leaves, stopping only momentarily to give Deeks one piece of advice. "Don't forget an infant car seat, Mr. Deeks. You'd be amazed how many new parents arrive to pick up a child and have to run to Walmart."
The congratulations continue, but Deeks cuts them short.
"I need to see Kensi."
"Tree is with her now. I won't text him what happened so you can give Kensi the news yourself. He won't be able to keep a poker face," Fatima tells him.
"Forty-two hours," Deeks says with a look of worry on his face.
"What's that?" Callen asks.
"Well in forty-two hours we're going to have a baby moving into our house. Our baby. We don't have clothes. Or a crib. Or bottles. Or those cups with the special mouth things – sippy cups, we don't have any sippy cups …"
"Deeks. Deeks!" Sam says, bringing Deeks attention back to the circle of friends. "Go tell Kensi the good news. G and I will come by the hospital later tonight and we'll figure out how we can help. If Kensi gets discharged, tell us and we'll meet you at your place. It will all be fine."
"It will all be fine," he repeats, letting Sam be a calming influence on him.
Deeks takes in his friends' optimism, and heads to the hospital. He knocks on the door to Kensi's room gently, but not listening for a response. His face gives away nothing and Rountree is on his feet before Deeks says a word. Devin awkwardly uses his thumb to point at the door, not actually vocalizing anything but "umm" and heading to the exit. Deeks tells him to call Fatima and watches while the door closes.
Then he turns back to Kensi. She's sitting up with one knee bent on the bed in front of her. She's fidgeting with her hands. Her eyes are filled with hope and anxiety. He tries to think of the words, but in his mind all he can see is that little girl in Kensi's arms, and the smile that spreads across his face is nothing but pure joy. And she knows.
"Really?"
"Really."
"Deeks, you're going to be a dad." They are words he always wanted to hear her say.
"I am a dad. And you are a mom. Kensi, we have a little girl." His voice is a mixture of disbelief and amazement, and he closes the distance between them and pulls her tight.
"I'm a mom," she whispers.
"You're a mom," he says again. He can't believe how great the words sound.
"I love you," she tells him.
"I love you," he tells her back. He loosens his grip and she gets to the point.
"Tell me, tell me, tell me!"
"Tell you what?"
"Everything," she says, and he recounts the three hours he's been away from her.
Deeks tells her everything about the hearing. He doesn't leave one detail out. It comes back to the same reality every time. There is a little girl who will be in their arms in two days, and it will be the start of an all-new life. They don't talk about parental leave or day care or any of the hundred small details that they'll need to settle in the coming weeks. Tonight they sit in a hospital room and dream together.
"Do you have any ideas for the nursery? We'll have a lot to do tomorrow when we get you home. Have you given it any thought?"
"Jungle. I want it to look like a jungle with animals and trees and rich colors against a cornflower blue sky."
He can't stop the tears that well in his eyes.
"It sounds perfect."