Holly's Story - Part IV
Chapter 8 - Paris
It had been three months since Holly arrived in Paris. She was surprised she hadn't heard from Oliver yet, but she had promised to send him her forwarding address but she never did. She didn't know why but she did feel a tiny bit disappointed that he hadn't come after her. Oh well...
Paris was starting to feel like home. It was indeed the city of lights and the city of her dreams. She was loving every second of her new life. She didn't miss Oliver (or so she told herself) and she certainly didn't miss America. She enrolled herself at a school to study French as a second language. She was picking up the language quickly. She'd made friends quickly, too. She also wasted no time in finding a poetry club to join. It met in a cafe every Monday evening.
At school she met Lucas Johansson, a Swedish rugby player who relocated to France to play for a French team. They quickly became close friends. Lucas was a blonde giant who looked like Thor. He had no taste for poetry, but he went to the poetry club with Holly to further his comprehension of the French language. He was extremely attractive with a boyish smile that attracted women like bees to honey. Lucas was 5 years younger than Holly and often, she felt like she was his mother. However, their friendship naturally developed into something more intimate.
Holly was not sporty at all. She never played any sport in high school and found the cheerleaders to be shallow people. She was, however, enjoying her interaction with Lucas and his friends. She even agreed to attend a rugby match between France and New Zealand which was a classic to all who followed rugby. Everybody was buzzing about it and Holly was caught up in the excitement. After the match, they were invited to a reception in the players' lounge. Holly was enthralled by all the attention she received from the players. They were all extremely tall, strong and good looking. The American girl certainly offered a good change of pace for the crowd of men, since she knew nothing about the sport and was more than happy to talk about other things.
However, the relationship between Holly and Lucas didn't survive much longer. Holly tired of Lucas due to his somewhat limited intellect. But mostly because Holly realised the guy was a magnet to every good looking girl who crossed his path with his encouraging smile and flirty demeanour, she simply lost interest in the blonde giant and let him go. Lucas took up with a New Zealand model he met during his team's tour of France.
Soon after her split with Lucas, Holly developed a close friendship with her French tutor, Pierre Binit. Pierre reminded her of Oliver to some extent, as he wanted a wife rather than a casual girlfriend. He was 12 years older than her. Time was ticking by for him as he wanted children while he was still young to enjoy them. Holly had not told anybody in her new city she was actually married. When her friends asked about her life in Denver, she told them about Remy instead of Oliver. She kept her history with Oliver a secret, as she had no idea how she was going to resolve that piece of the puzzle in her life.
As time passed by, one year soon became two years since she arrived in Paris. Holly was less and less concerned about Oliver and the life she left behind in Denver. The fact that Oliver had made no attempt to contact her both irritated and freed her.
Holly then met Dominic Laurent, a journalist and new member of the Poetry Club. They struck up a close friendship which quickly evolved into a steamy love affair reminiscent of her relationship with Remy. Holly fell madly in love with Dominic in a way she never thought possible for her ever again. Dominic simply occupied the space in her heart that had belonged to Remy. She finally realised that Oliver had never come anywhere near that space.
Dominic and Holly moved in together. Holly decided it was time to settle down and put down some stronger roots in her new city, which in reality was now her permanent home. She was never going back to America and that was final. She proceeded to renew her lease on her apartment for the next three years.
Towards the end of the winter, on a beautifully crisp day while walking in a park covered with snow, Dominic went down on one knee and asked her to marry him. He took a gorgeous ring out of his pocket and offered it to her with a heartfelt declaration of love. Holly burst into tears.
"What's happening, mon petit cheri?" Dominic was alarmed.
Holly realised the man she loved would never be totally hers unless she got Oliver out of her life.
"I need to tell you something really important, Dominic."
"Ok, what is it? Whatever it is, we will deal with it together."
She bit her lip nervously. She had no idea how Dominic was going to react to this news and the last thing she wanted to do was lose him. She had no option but to come clean about her past.
"I can't marry you, mon cheri because I'm already married." Holly, heartbroken, said with tears running down her face.
"You what?" Dominic said incredulously. Holly took a deep breath and plunged into an explanation.
"Yes, I'm married in America… in Denver! His name is Oliver O'Toole. He was a mistake, my mistake! We had been married for less than a year when I left him to come here. I haven't heard from him since. Part of this is my fault though, as I've never sent him my forwarding address."
Dominic stood there stunned by this news. "You're not divorced?" He finally managed to ask.
"No! I'm not."
He then nodded, as if there was nothing else to do but one thing. "Well, this can be easily sorted out. Go get a divorce."
Holly looked at him, terrified. She didn't know why, but the idea of writing to Oliver to ask for a divorce struck pangs of panic into her heart. However, she knew he was right. It was either face the music with Oliver and ask for her freedom or remain stuck in place and lose Dominic. They resumed their walk after she promised him she was going to take care of it.
Holly had every intention of following through with her promise when she discovered she was 8 weeks pregnant. She went into a panic! What am I going to do, she thought. She was on the verge of telling Dominic of this new development when she received a letter from Oliver.
The letter had been redirected by his own USPS department in Denver. What a weird thing, she thought. Why didn't he simply write her a new letter when the old damaged one showed up in front of him? It was a complete mess, looking like it had been thoroughly submerged in water.
She was however, able to read the letter's contents... just. It informed her he was still waiting for her. He promised he was willing to try again and see the world through her eyes, but, if she had moved on and left him forever, he would accept her decision.
She was touched by his letter far more than she expected to be. She was forced to recognise she had made Oliver a victim of her foolishness. She had asked him to marry her, not the other way round. She was surprised to hear he was still waiting for her. It had been more than two years since she left Denver. She had to admit Oliver was one in a million among men. She knew he took his vows seriously but this was far beyond what she expected.
She decided immediately there was no time to lose and she had to set both of them free. She needed to get to Denver while her growing pregnancy could not be detected. She knew he would be devastated if he were to find out the extent of her betrayal and she had no wish to hurt him more than she had already.
For the first time ever in her life, Holly was aware her life decisions affected other people just as much as they affected her, if not more. She booked a seat on the next flight to Denver.
The minute Holly entered the DLO in Denver, she felt a little nervous. She felt a little pinch in her heart, followed by a wave of a nostalgia. The office was deserted.
She had only been in this office twice in her life and had paid very little attention to its decor or the lack there of. However, she noticed something different as soon as she entered: there was a computer! Oliver hated technology and vowed to never allow it in his sacred DLO. The computer was set up on a funny looking desk. It looked like a converted sewing table on wheels. Holly stopped and looked at it. The desk was neatly organised. She quickly concluded the desk and the computer on it belonged to a woman.
She walked over to the coat stand and saw Oliver's hat hanging on it. She couldn't help but touch it, raise it to her face and breathe in the scent from it. The minute she caught a whiff of his scent, her eyes filled with tears. She didn't understand this rise of emotions invading her heart, unbidden.
She looked at his desk and saw the little silver box she had given him after he saved her from certain death. She also noticed a miniature model of the Eiffel Tower. When had he acquired that? Was it because of her? Obviously it had to be, she thought. Had Oliver actually been in love with her? Was he still?
She walked around his desk, sat in his chair and turned it around. As the chair stopped rotating, she saw a row of award cups he used to go on and on about. What was the award called? The darkest night? Darkness of night? She couldn't remember it now, but she remembered how Oliver longed to earn that award. It seemed he had finally received one.
She picked it up, looked at it and put it back down again. Curious, she looked at the next one and saw it was awarded to a Shane McInerney. She didn't recognise that name, but she recognised all the others. There was also a team photo showing all of them holding their cups. Next to Oliver stood a beautiful blonde woman looking up lovingly at him. All the others looked straight ahead at the camera. Holly's heart did a little flip with a twinge of jealousy.
The blonde, whoever she was, was obviously in love with Oliver. She recognised it immediately because it was written all over her face. She wondered if Oliver knew it and if he did, did he love her back? She sat there in Oliver's chair pondering these things when she heard the double doors swing open. She heard the tap tap of a woman's high heeled shoes on the hard floor boards. She held her breath as the taps came closer. Holly turned the chair to see the blonde standing right in front of Oliver's desk, looking completely dumbfounded to see her sitting there. Holly smiled at her.
"Hi, I'm Holly… would you like a Yoohoo?"
Holly didn't know why she offered the blonde that awful drink... she hated it. But she suspected she was simply marking her spousal territory? The blonde took a few seconds to recover from the shock but eventually she said, "No, thanks. I usually leave those for Oli… Mr. O'Toole."
Ha! Holly noticed the familiarity in the blonde's voice before she could catch herself. "Ah! I'm his wife, you know?" Again, Holly didn't know why all of a sudden being Oliver's wife meant so much to her. It never mattered to her before. They exchanged a few polite remarks until Holly decided to share some secrets about Oliver. She informed the blonde when Oliver ordered clams and red wine he was angry. The blonde said something irrelevant about it. Then Holly decided to share something more intimate to see how the blonde would react.
"Do you want to know the funniest thing about him?" She said, closing the space between them, and then lowering her voice as though she was her confidant. "That man can kiss!"
Holly had a dreamy look in her eyes as if she was imagining kissing Oliver right then. The blonde looked stunned. Holly was really enjoying this little repartee.
Yes, Holly was confidante the blonde was in love with Oliver. There was no doubt about it. After a few other comments, the double doors opened again and Oliver came in. He stopped abruptly when he saw the two women standing just a foot away from each other. Both women turned towards him.
Holly's breath caught when she saw him. It hit her hard once again why she wanted him so badly back then. He was still drop dead gorgeous! At that very moment, she wished she loved him with all her heart. She felt a tenderness towards him and she realised Oliver deserved better than what he got from her and what she could offer him henceforth. The blonde left the room.
They looked awkwardly at each other and exchanged a few forced pleasantries. He asked her where she was staying; she informed him she was at The Brown Palace. He looked slightly disappointed. She felt the need to reassure him. She gave him a confidante smile and they decided to meet later on the lobby of the hotel.
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Chapter 9 - The Last Kiss
Holly was very emotional. She wondered if it was due to the pregnancy or seeing Oliver again or just plain exhaustion messing with her emotions. She called Dominic to tell him she had a meeting with Oliver scheduled for that evening and she would return to Paris as soon as she could.
Half an hour later than the agreed time, Holly made her way down to the hotel lobby. She saw Oliver waiting for her. He looked sad... or was he just tired? They sat and clinked their champagne glasses together. She took a tiny sip and put it down. Oliver started the conversation.
"This feels very strange. The letter I sent was written so long ago, I can barely remember what it said." Holly was surprised and a bit hurt she had to remind him of what he wrote.
"I was locked in a bank vault when I wrote that." He protested.
Holly was baffled. What was he saying?
"Ollie, what are you saying? Do you want me back?" He looked annoyed. "Excuse me! Is that it? Do I want you back? Holly, I want an explanation. I want to know why my wife ran away to Paris, and never even called, never wrote. Do you have any idea what you put me through? You let me sit here, for 2 years, terrified that maybe something bad happened to you."
"But nothing happened… well, lots happened, but nothing bad."
"That would have been nice to know."
"Ollie…" He interrupted her, "Please don't call me that."
Yes, he was annoyed. Holly had to change her tactics. She reminded him that when they first met, she told him she needed to be free and she appreciated him being her hero when she needed one.
The awkward conversation went back and forth without actually getting anywhere until she subtly alluded to divorce. He picked up on that, but he asked her to think about it overnight. They agreed they would talk further the following day when they were both better rested. She told him she was going to write a poem about their meeting tonight. Oliver seemed unimpressed.
Back in her hotel room, Holly started to think about the conversation they'd just had. Although Oliver did not jump at the idea of divorce, he certainly did not dismiss it either. The Oliver of two years ago would never have even entertained such an idea. It seemed to Holly he was stalling, but did not seem to actually be against it.
Could he be in love with the blonde as well? She pondered. What did she care whether he was or not? Hadn't she come here to put an end to this marriage? Why was she hesitating now? She was annoyed with herself. Despite her desire to let Oliver go once and for all, she was jealous that he seemed to have found someone else to replace her.
The following night Holly met him at the Mailbox Grille. He had hired out the entire restaurant just for the two of them. Holly was touched he'd made the effort to decorate it with twinkly lights and scented candles. The place looked and felt magical.
They had a lovely meal accompanied by easy conversation about her poetry and her life in Paris. He was not judgmental but she kept her current situation a secret. She certainly did not wish to hurt him any further. She then showed him the poem she'd written about freedom the night before. He understood what she wanted. Holly noticed he appeared relieved. They agreed to a divorce.
"I'm so sorry, Ollie that I took so long to come back. The longer I stayed away, the further away the road home seemed. I did not mean to hurt you."
"You did hurt me, Holly, but I've decided to forgive you. I wish you all the best in Paris."
Holly noticed he never asked for any details of her life. A bit annoyed, she just couldn't leave things like this. She had to ask. "So, Ollie, the blonde in your office…"
He lifted an eyebrow. "Ms. McInerney! What about her?"
"Are you two… you know?"
"No, I don't know. What do you mean, Holly?"
"She's in love with you!" She blurted out.
All of a sudden he seemed very irritated. "How do you know that, Holly?"
"She looks at you like I should have."
He gasped and simply looked at her.
"Are you in love with her?" Holly finally asked.
He looked at her unblinkingly for a few moments as if contemplating what he should say. Finally he said, "I need you to know I've never been unfaithful to you, Holly. Whatever my feelings for Ms. McInerney may be, I've never allowed them to cloud my judgment or violate my vows to you."
This was as good as a confession. Although she felt relieved, she felt a little melancholy too as well as a touch of guilt since she didn't offer him the same courtesy. However, she was determined to leave with her dignity intact, so she didn't let on how she was feeling.
"I'm glad you're in love with her Ollie. I'm sure she adores you. You know, you deserve that. I wish it had been me, but it wasn't meant to be. All I want you to do now is not waste any more time with people who don't deserve you. It's time to for you to start fully living your life, Ollie."
He then smiled at her tenderly. "Thank you, Holly. I think I will take your advice. Before you go though, will you dance with me?"
"What? You don't dance."
"You asked me to learn, remember?"
They started dancing and Holly's jaw dropped. "Wow! You really did it, but...I'm guessing you didn't do it for me."
"I started doing it for you, but you were not here, Holly. Someone else had to help me and now I look forward to dancing with her as a free man."
Holly felt sad. She had not expected to feel her heart breaking as Oliver said he had dreams of a future with another woman. She guessed she had loved him more than she realised and now it was too late to do anything about it. She had taken him for granted and all her regrets now made no difference.
He kissed her goodbye by the end, but it carried none of their former passion, there was no warmth in it, no love. It was simply a goodbye kiss, one in which to remember the good days gone by. It was the last kiss she would ever receive from him.
The End