Adjusting to being part of a group was both easier and harder than Croagunk thought it would be. One of the worst parts was that he never had any privacy. He had thought that wouldn't be something that would bug him too much, because there hadn't been a lot of personal space in the swamp where he had once lived. Pokémon lived in every inch of the swamp, and every little crevice was occupied by a pokémon.
In the swamp though, if Croagunk really wanted some privacy, he would find someplace relatively secluded and intimidate those occupying it until they left. He couldn't really do that here. He would know, he had tried.
The kids and their pokémon were just too nice. If they recognized that Croagunk needed space or was getting fidgety, Dawn and Ash would ask him what was wrong. They didn't seem to understand that he wasn't upset, he just needed to get away from the constant company.
If Ash and Dawn weren't going out of their way to make him feel better, the other pokémon were. Chimchar kept on trying to talk to Croagunk about how he understood how overwhelming and new it could be to be the new pokémon in their group. Happiny just thought that he always needed a hug, and how was he supposed to say no to her?
Pikachu and Piplup kept on trying to go out of their way to make sure he knew he belonged. Croagunk appreciated the effort, but it was a lot. It made him wish he could retreat into his pokéball and just stay there until he was ready to socialize on his own terms, but he couldn't.
It was frustrating. He had never been claustrophobic before, and now he couldn't stand the smallest amount of restraint without either shutting down or fighting back.
He had thought that the box was the best part of being with Team Galactic. That had been his safe place, but that was just when he was put in there after getting hurt. The box had meant a reprieve from pain, but after he recovered, all it meant was an inability to do anything. Even when he was physically and mentally ready to face the pain waiting for him, he wasn't let out until Team Galactic wanted him, and that lack of choice had hurt more than he thought it would, and he was just noticing it now.
It was humiliating. The others had patience with him, but he didn't have it for himself. He should be stronger than this. There was nobody out here waiting to hurt him, or to force him to hurt someone else. And when he was in his pokéball, he knew that he could come out whenever he wanted. Brock had proven that much to him countless times. He knew it, but he didn't feel it, and that was enough.
Despite his frustrations with the kids and other pokémon, Croagunk really did like being here. He liked having people around that took care of him, not because they thought he needed it, but because they cared about him. And Croagunk liked being able to take care of them in return.
It was weird. He had never thought that he would be part of a group. And yet here he was, helping Brock as he made dinner. Sitting and listening to Dawn as she talked about new potential contest strategies, just because saying things out loud helped her to figure out something she'd been stuck on. He didn't always join the other pokémon in their games, but he sometimes did, and he even enjoyed himself.
He liked being with this group. This family. They were like a clan of sorts, and he liked that he felt a part of them even if he didn't necessarily fit in perfectly. He didn't always join them. Sometimes he would just stand to the side and watch as they played. When the others set up camp, he would stand by Brock's side, but not necessarily help him. When disagreements broke out, or someone got a minor injury and needed comfort, he took a step back and stayed out of it, letting the others take care of it.
And they understood.
Nobody made passive-aggressive comments about how he needed to be a team-player, or try to be a better and nicer pokémon. Brock would just sit with Croagunk at night, thanking him for any small amount of help he might have been that day, even if Croagunk felt like he hadn't done anything. And then Brock would tell him that he didn't have to carry his weight or prove his worth to be with them. He was there because he wanted to be, and because Brock wanted him, and it was as simple as that.
There were a few days where Croagunk pushed at the boundaries. He didn't do anything to help. He huffed and glared at anybody who approached him. He didn't even let Happiny or Brock get too close. The only reason why was because he wanted to see how they would react. If he would get kicked out, or if they'd even just get disappointed in him.
Brock just asked him if he had done something wrong, or if there was anything he could do. When Croagunk shook his head and scooted away from Brock, the boy just gave him a small smile, reminded him that he was there when he needed him, and then he let Croagunk have his space until he opened himself up again.
When Croagunk started letting himself be part of the group again, the others let him in without question or comment. They acted like nothing had happened, and that was just what Croagunk needed.
After two weeks, he started to get used to this new situation. He let himself connect with the others. He played more, and he let himself wander off and get alone time when he needed to. It was odd, but nice. He was even able to get to the point where he could admit to himself, and the others, when he was tired and couldn't walk on his own anymore, and he trusted Brock enough to climb onto his back and be carried by him for a time so they could keep going.
He still didn't like to be held, and though he was getting better at that it was very slow progress. He could be carried though, as long as he was the one in control and he could climb down whenever he wanted.
He let himself relax, and that was a mistake. While the kids were nice and gentle, they had a tendency to get in over their heads. Croagunk had seen that enough for himself. The kids could get themselves out of trouble just as easily as they wandered into it, which was why Croagunk hadn't thought it would be a problem.
And then Team Rocket showed up out of the blue, like they were so good at doing, and before Croagunk could blink, let alone warn someone, he found himself trapped in a cage along with all of the other pokémon.
It wasn't that bad. Or, at least, it shouldn't be. Pikachu, Piplup, and some of the other pokémon, were putting up a fuss and trying to fight. The others were just sitting casually, patiently waiting for their trainers to show up and take down Team Rocket, just like they'd done countless times before.
Croagunk might have just sat back and waited too, if it weren't for the fact that they were trapped in a cage and he couldn't get out.
Croagunk crouched on the ground in the back of the cage, croaking and keeping his gaze glued to the ground. If he couldn't see the bars around them, maybe he could ignore the fact that he was stuck.
Croagunk kept on tapping the arm of the one next to him. He went in intervals of three without even realizing that he was doing it. He was subconsciously giving the signal that he would give to Brock when he needed to get free.
But this wasn't practice. This wasn't a safe situation, where Brock would let him go without a second thought. He really was trapped, and he couldn't get out.
He didn't know how long he sat there before he felt a touch on his arm. He jolted and turned his head to see Happiny looking at him with bright, concerned eyes.
"Okay?" She asked. Apparently while he'd been gone, she'd grown up enough to talk at least a little.
Croagunk wanted to say he was fine, but he knew she wouldn't believe him for a second. She was born to be a healer. She could tell that he was upset, and nothing he said would help.
Croagunk shook his head. Happiny pouted and took his hand. She started pulling him towards the front of the cage. He cringed and shrunk back from any little touch. Being trapped was one thing. Being stuck with the others made the space feel even smaller.
He tried not to think about the fact that he was stuck and crowded. He focused on Happiny, watching as she pulled him to Pikachu. He was growling and yelling at Meowth, who was outside of the cage, guarding and ignoring them. Happiny tugged on Pikachu's paw until he turned his attention to her.
"Help." Happiny pulled Croagunk closer. "He's sad."
Pikachu looked at him, his eyes wide. He could tell that what was going on with Croagunk was more than just him being upset.
"What's wrong?" Pikachu asked urgently. A few weeks ago, Croagunk would have refused to answer. He would have taken care of it on his own. But look at where being alone had brought him. And he didn't have to do that anymore.
Croagunk huffed and looked to the side. He was willing to ask for help, but that wouldn't make it any less embarrassing. "I don't like being trapped." Pikachu's ears tilted back. He looked at Croagunk's free hand, which he hadn't realized he was tapping against his leg. Still three taps. He was still asking to be let go, and now Pikachu, who knew what the taps meant, could see it.
Pikachu looked back over his shoulder towards Meowth. "Hang on." He took Croagunk's hand, stopping him from tapping, and pulled him towards the bars. "Hey! Meowth, I need you to listen for a second."
"I ain't listening to a thing you've gots to say." Meowth said. He glanced towards them, eyeing Croagunk. "How's it feel on that side of the cage?"
"Bad." Croagunk said honestly. He'd already opened himself up to Meowth about other things. Why not this?
"He's claustrophobic." Pikachu said. Meowth frowned and turned his full attention to them. "He needs to get out."
"Hang on, I'm not letting you losers out just 'cause you asked nicely." Meowth crossed his arms.
"Not all of us." Pikachu said. "Just him. He won't even fight you or try to run away. He can just sit outside the cage until this is all over." Croagunk blinked, trying to wrap his head around the negotiation going on. Pikachu was trying to get him his freedom, even though the rest of them would still be stuck. This was just for him. Croagunk had never had others go out of their way like this just for his sake.
He didn't think Meowth would go for it, but he actually seemed to be thinking it over. Croagunk looked at Meowth, who studied him carefully.
"You're really not looking too good." Meowth commented. Croagunk croaked. He hated that he apparently looked as vulnerable as he felt. Was it really that obvious how weak he was? Meowth was still for a long time before he sighed. "Alright, everyone back away from the door."
Pikachu brightened, nearly sparking. He started encouraging the others to do what they were told. Croagunk huffed, hating this extra attention and special care he was being given. He shouldn't need this. He shouldn't be so pathetic.
The cage was opened, and Croagunk, despite hating how weak he felt, he walked out of the cage, immediately feeling relief. His body relaxed and he felt like he could breathe. Now that he wasn't trapped, he no longer felt weak, he felt frustrated.
He huffed and crouched next to the cage, glaring at the ground, though when Meowth sat next to him he turned his glare towards him instead. Meowth just gave him an amused look.
"Well, you look better already." Meowth said.
"Leave me alone." Croagunk said.
"What was that about though?" Meowth asked. "You don't get freaked out like that."
"He got hurt." Happiny said. Croagunk jolted and looked at her, surprised to find that she was standing right in front of him, out of the cage. Croagunk looked at Meowth, raising an eyebrow. Meowth shrugged.
"She's really persuasive." Meowth said. "She didn't want to leave you alone, and I really didn't think she would be a threat."
"She could single-handedly kick you into next week." Croagunk said.
"Not if I don't give her reason to." Meowth said. "If you're happy, she's happy, and I'm happy because my bones remain intact." Happiny nodded and sat next to Croagunk, happily kicking her feet, but not touching him. She seemed to understand his boundaries more than he thought she would.
"This hurt she's talking about, was it that whole thing that happened with Toxicroak?" Meowth asked slowly. Croagunk stiffened. He hated being reminded of what had happened.
"It's just Team Galactic." Croagunk said. "I thought I was fine, and then I got away from them, and I'm not fine after all."
"Yeah, those guys are a bit too intense for my liking." Meowth said. He scratched at the dirt with his claw, doodling a nonsense picture. "Are you doing better with the twerps though? Even with everything going on with Brock?"
Croagunk huffed. He'd been getting better at just not thinking of just how he felt about Brock. He cared about his trainer, and he was cared about in return. That was as much as he was going to get, and he was happy with it.
"It's fine." Croagunk said. "I can't really ask for more."
Meowth shook his head. "You're better than I am." That was odd for Croagunk to hear. He had never thought that he would be seen as a good person by anybody. He'd just been him. Not good, not bad, and being content with it. It was weird to be seen as good and decent.
They sat there for a bit before their trainers all arrived to get them. Croagunk didn't really pay attention to this part, because he knew what was going to happen. The kids would get their pokémon back, and they would all go on with their day, same as usual.
Croagunk just sat there, feeling enough at ease to let Happiny sit on his lap, the way that he usually sat with Brock. It was easier to hold onto someone as opposed to being held. The others were freed from the cage, a short battle happened, and Team Rocket was blasted off again.
It was all over in the span of just a few minutes. The kids were reuniting with the pokémon. Brock knelt in front of Croagunk, taking Happiny from his hold
"Are you okay?" Brock asked. Croagunk thought for a second before he nodded. "Being trapped wasn't too bad?"
Croagunk shook his head. It had been hard while in the cage itself, but Pikachu and Happiny had looked out for him. All of them had. He was part of their little family, and he actually felt like it.
Croagunk felt content and safe. He reached out and grabbed Brock's hand. The boy smiled and accepted the touch. Croagunk didn't often initiate contact like this, but he was getting more comfortable. He was fine, and he would stay this way. He wasn't going anywhere, and neither were his new friends. He had never thought that he would be part of a team before, but now that he was, he couldn't imagine it any other way.