Memories Belated, The Agony Overdue

Chapter 1: Tragedy of the Past

Their body was covered in scars. A total of thirty-one cuts on the torso front and back. Some deeper than others. Even so, this person has fought righteously all of their life.

No matter what kind of beating, stabbing or thrashing they endured. They'd always tell others with a lighthearted tone and a warm smile. "This is my pride. We have always fought for a better world. And this pain is the evidence of that."

Like the light of Kazdel years ago that had once held an undying dream to unite her people. This special individual believed wholeheartedly he could bring the world together.

He just needed time. But how much longer must he endure until he sees the light at the end of the tunnel on this path paved with the corpses of his friends and loved ones?

He had asked that question before everything was lost.

In a solitary room of the medical ward of Rhodes Island. The Doctor lies in silence with his coat hung nearby. He received a brutal hit to his temple during the previous operation where he took a dangerous risk upon himself in order to have a chance at saving his entire team. Succeeded he did and another scar he gained.

But this physical scar was nothing compared to the past that was now catching up to him.

When the Doctor closed his eyes, a vivid, light, warm and nostalgic scenery appeared. It was blurry as if splashed with water paint or crayons... Constantly changing and warping. There were colours of gray. Colours of... white... and green of what seemed to be vines and patches of grass strewn about on the floor before him. It was very hazy, but the scenery felt reminiscent, of the clearing inside of a deserted building. A place he had slept many nights in.

Where was this? It had such a warm feeling to it, such a warm scent. It was a feeling of home, but at the same time, a feeling gripped his heart terribly as if awaiting the inevitable and like a nightmare if it could be called one. A cast of shadows appeared from the corner and slowly walked up to him.

Doctor wasn't at all apprehensive at the figures. Before he realized it, a warm stream of water began to slowly fall from his eyes as his chest began to tighten in anticipation of the voice that was already replaying in his head before it was even said, like he had heard it thousands of times before or repeated it to himself countless of times in order to remain sane.

"We'll trust you. Wherever you go is where we'll go." The kind voice spoke and at that moment, as if by some miracle or the sound of his tone serving as the catalyst to the return of his memories. He began to see their faces one by one.

Doctor opened his eyes. The river of tears silently started to fall from the man's once cold eyes and would not stop for even a second as he began to gasp and pant, trying to keep himself together from breaking apart. But it was only a matter of time. He had only so much strength to go on for so long.

He couldn't feel the flames in himself anymore. His vigour drained from his heart and was all thrown out to the dust as his expression slowly contorted and warped into a scowl, then a frown as he threw his hand up to his eyes to cover them while sobbing quietly.

The only thing that filled the optimistic leader, the unwavering will of Rhodes Island was regret.

"Did I make a mistake?"

"Why did you follow me?"

"What am I to you?"

"Why did you keep fighting?"

Questions flooded the Doctor's mind as he slowly sat up from the bed and leaned against the wall, wishing to himself that someone could come and give him the answer he needed. The punishment he deserved or the release he desired.

THUD

He threw his fist against the wall as it echoed a loud yet cold and apathetic sound of metal ringing across the room as if challenging him to do it again and again. Doctor's hand began to tremble in grief and misery as he let go of his now wet with tears and contorted into a scowl and frown that seemed more like the face of a madman rather than the calm and composed tactician of Rhodes Island.

"I didn't want things to end like this... It wasn't supposed to." The Doctor wallowed silently as he tried to suppress his voice into thoughts. It's okay. It will be over soon... but after that what then? keep going?

"...I wanted you all to live with me" For once, the Ghost of Babel could truthfully voice his sorrows. Not as the ruthless commander Kal'tsit and Theresa wanted him to be. But the now grieving King of the rundown slums of Kazdel.

To what ends did he fight? A childish fantasy? trust in the true King? None of that mattered anymore. Everyone was gone by the words of his mouth and the plans crafted from his hands. The decisions made by him.

He was willing to lose everything about himself, his home, his loved ones and even his identity for what he was promised. What he got in return was a neverending battle where he played the villain in order to stack on even more false hope that there would eventually be an end to all of this meaninglessness.

This was no good. He didn't want to be here. Someone will come in and they'll find him at the worst time possible.

No. It's not about them. He'd rather die than have to speak to anyone right now.

Scrambling off the bed in a frantic manner. He tripped and fell over headfirst onto the floor which caused the wound on his temple to burst open again from the sudden trauma, opening a gash of which blood started to flow slowly down towards his right cheek. Ignoring the wound, Doctor climbed onto his knees desperately like the devil was behind him as he reached for the door. But before he could even touch the door when he was still halfway on his feet. The door slid open and his heart shrank instantly.

He looked up to find the worst person he wanted to see right now. It was a young girl with long brown hair and a pair of bunny ears. The one who admired him the most who felt practically like an adoptive daughter to him.

"Doctor...?" Amiya asked as her voice trailed off in shock, terror and concern, her eyes widened in fear as she rushed forward the next second with worry, reaching out and supporting her mentor up.

"Doctor! What happened? Why are you on the floor!?" Amiya asked frantically as she tried to stabilize him.

"...No I'm fine.." Doctor frowned and looked away as he tried to push her off.

"You're not okay! You're bleeding!" Amiya yelled back in fury out of worry as she reached for his waist to help him up before her hand was curtly pushed aside.

"I SAID I'M FUCKING FINE!" Doctor barked as he threw Amiya's hand out of the way and backed into a corner of the room, his gaze was downcast on the floor while his hand was held up in a palm to signal Amiya to halt.

"I'm fine. Just leave." Doctor then repeated pleadingly. He realized that he had just yelled at Amiya very rudely which was out of character for a patient person like him.

Amiya glanced over at the Doctor, she could tell immediately that something was wrong, that he was hurt on a deeper level than just a scar on the temple. His hands were trembling, his eyes refused to look at her, and he spoke in a very panicked and frightened tone. Was he afraid of her? That didn't seem to be the case. Whatever it was, it had Amiya nerve-wracked as she could feel her own chest about to blow into pieces like the world was crumbling around her when she gazed down at the figure of the young-looking Doctor crawling away from her like a terrified old man who was being mercilessly and ruthlessly beaten by whatever invisible force of power she couldn't see with his face smeared with red tears and the reassuring smile that gave everyone courage and hope was replaced with an uncertain frown.

Silence overtook the two for a moment as Amiya hesitated, she was baffled at what to do.

"Please leave... and tell Kal'tsit that I'm off work for today, It's not for jokes this time." The Doctor then pleaded as he slowly gathered himself and stood him weakly, his knees trembled and buckled like they were about to give in and he was about to fall over again.

Amiya couldn't say anything in response. She wanted to but she was afraid to.

"Can we talk... tomorrow?" Amiya pleaded as she tried to make her voice as gentle as possible. But even that only earned her a wave of the finger, gesturing her to leave. Without any other options, Amiya left quietly.

"Please get well soon." She gave the Doctor her last prayer as she dashed out of the room with a nervous-filled expression that anyone could see and tell that something went terribly wrong.