~ Epilogue ~

Five years. It had been five years since Merlin left the hospital on the eve of Arthur's wedding.

Morgana was sitting outside of Gaius's office, cursing Merlin's need to go in alone. Every year for the past five years, Morgana had to play the same role as she sat out there and prayed that Merlin's results still showed that he was cancer–free. She desperately hoped that this was the last time.

She looked up as Merlin stepped out of the office and shook Gaius's hand with a grim look on his face.

Morgana felt her breath hitch with fear. "It's back isn't it. Don't try to spare me, just come right out and say it," Morgana said. She could feel fear rise up. They had been so close; five years and your chances go down so low, you're practically considered cured. So close.

"Bad news." Morgana took a deep breath. "My results came back completely normal. I'm going to be here for a long, long time to bother you."

Morgana hit him before she returned his infectious smile. "Jerk. You're really okay?"

"I'm okay."

Morgana launched herself at Merlin and hugged him close to her. Merlin held her soothingly, kissing her hair and telling her everything was fine.

Merlin took a step back from her several minutes later. "Morgana?"

"Yes?"

"Do you remember five years ago when we were standing in my hospital room? I told you that I made a deal with God. If he put me into remission, I would stop being a coward and finally kiss you?" He had a strange look in his eyes.

"How could I forget? I saw a different side of you that day."

Merlin chuckled. "Well, I made another deal with god. I told him if my results came back clear, I would stop being a coward and do something I was too scared to do otherwise."

"You're not going skydiving are you? I know you mentioned that once, years ago, but I honestly thought you were joking and..." Merlin couldn't help but roll his eyes. Skydiving? Morgana should know better by now. Her voice trailed off as she watched Merlin slide down to one knee. "Merlin… What are you doing?"

"Being brave. Morgana Le Fey. You have been there for me at my weakest moments. You have never once turned your back on me. You have made me happier these past five years than I knew I was capable of being. I love you more than I thought it was possible to love someone. Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?" After Morgana was staring at Merlin shocked for several minutes, Merlin began to lose confidence.

"Keep in mind that I have cancer and if you say no, everyone will think you're a heartless bitch." He had to joke, because that was the only way he could hide how upset he was that Morgana hadn't said yes yet and didn't look like she was going to. They'd vaguely talked about marriage. Enough that Merlin had gone into this with relative confidence. He realized he must've been deluding himself. "Well, except for me. I'd never think you were… you know. I'll always love you. I just hoped that we could get married because that's kind of what people who are in love and want to spend the rest of their lives together do. Unless you don't want to..."

Little did he know that Morgana's mind was working faster than her body. In her head, she had already said yes. She was picturing a whole future with Merlin in that moment – Merlin in a dashing suit at their wedding, their first dance, smushing cake into his face, buying a house together and turning it into a home.

In fact, Morgana probably wouldn't have realized that she hadn't said anything yet if it weren't for Merlin's terrified rambling. "It's okay if you don't want to say yes; I would just really like it if you said something."

"What?" Morgana snapped out of her haze. "Yes, of course. Yes! Yes! Yes!"

"Yes?" Merlin confirmed.

"Yes," Morgana agreed.

This time, Merlin was the one to pull her close to him. He bent down slightly and pressed their lips together. The kiss soon picked up. Merlin never wanted this moment to end.

"Hey! I've got young children here," a voice warned.

Merlin and Morgana broke apart, both red in the face.

"What are you doing here?" Morgana asked.

"I just wanted to support my best friend as he proposed to his girlfriend of five years," Arthur said innocently.

"You told him? What am I saying? Of course, you did. I guess I shouldn't be surprised."

"Who do you think was the mastermind behind this proposal?"

"Merlin." There was no doubt in her mind; the proposal had been too perfectly Merlin. Arthur would never have been creative enough or romantic enough to think of this.

"Fair enough, but I told him it was a good plan."

"Ah, yes. Obviously, he was very actively involved in this planning process," Merlin teased. He hugged Morgana tightly. "Where's my favorite nephew?"

"Yes, where is the little devil?" Morgana asked affectionately as she looked around.

As if on cue, a little boy came running towards them, followed by Gwen who was carrying their ten–month–old daughter, Freya. Merlin still got choked up sometimes when he spoke her name. He hadn't expected it, but it had been Gwen's idea.

"Uncle Merlin!" The boy screamed as he ran towards Merlin. Merlin scooped him up and spun him around so he was shrieking wildly.

"No hi for Aunt Morgana?" No one was surprised by this. Merlin was Elian's favorite person on this planet; sometimes he preferred Merlin to his own parents.

Elian hid his face in Merlin's shirt. "Hey, it's okay," Merlin said soothingly. Elian refused to unhide his head. "Hey,I think Aunt Morgana has candy for you."

Elian immediately picked his head up and looked at Morgana hopefully. Morgana chuckled as she looked around in her purse, trying to find something. Elian was like that with everyone. The only way he warmed up to someone was if they gave them candy. With one exception. Merlin.

No one could really bring themselves to be upset about it; it kind of seemed inevitable that Merlin would be best friends with Arthur's children. Elian was named after Gwen's late brother. He had died in a car accident the year before she started high school.

When Morgana held out her hands, Elian eagerly went to her, sucking on the lollipop Morgana gave him.

Merlin looked around at his amazing family and fiancé; he couldn't imagine life getting any better.

He was proven wrong, exactly one year later, when Morgana was walking down the aisle towards him. She was a breathtaking sight in a white gown that was adorned with tiny cloth flowers. Her train trailed behind her as she approached him. When she got to him, he took her hand and he had no intention of letting go. Merlin couldn't figure out how anyone getting married would ever be able to pay attention to the officiant. If Morgana's hold on his hand hadn't tightened, he probably wouldn't have realized that they were supposed to recite vows. Merlin and Morgana had decided they would write their own vows.

Merlin went first. "Morgana, six years ago, I made a deal with God. I told him if he made me better, I would do something I was normally too cowardly to do. That's how I stand before you today, ready to do the scariest thing of my life. I am prepared to promise you the world. I promise to always support you, to love you forever, and to work hard to be the man you think I am. I am ready to make you my wife."

"Merlin, if you had told me seven years ago when I first met you that I would be in love with you and would be willing to marry you, I would have told you, you were crazy. But then I got to know you, the more I fell in love with you. I promise to love you always, to be by your side no matter what happens, and to remind you everyday that you are strong. I never thought I'd want to be someone's wife, but I couldn't not love you. That's how I'm standing before you, ready to declare myself your wife." There were tears in her eyes and she wasn't even trying to hide it. She never thought it was possible to be this happy. They turned to the officiant, so they could do the whole 'do you take this person' bit.

Time seemed to fly as they shared their I dos. When they were announced as husband and wife, Merlin wiped the tears from Morgana's eyes and pressed his lips to hers. The church erupted with cheers, but Merlin couldn't make himself pay attention. All of that was background noise. What mattered was that this incredible woman in front of him was his wife.

Arthur and Gwen practically pushed them down the aisle, but Morgana and Merlin never took their eyes off of each other.

This was it, Merlin thought. This was the happiest he was capable of being.

Once again, Merlin was proven wrong five years later. He'd just gotten home from his fellowship, and his thoughts had only been on collapsing on the couch with Morgana and watching a movie while their cat climbed all over them. It had seemed like fate when he'd been selected to do his oncology fellowship with Gaius, but he hadn't realized exactly how much work Gaius had done for him. He did so much work behind the scenes.

His hopes of a nice quiet night were crushed when he walked in and saw Morgana sitting at the kitchen table. She had a pint of ice cream in front of her and the spoon was sticking out. When he got closer, he noticed the distinct signs that she'd been crying. She'd thrown her hair up into a messy bun, had swapped out her contacts for glasses, and the puffiness around her eyes was unmistakable. Merlin started to panic; something was wrong. Merlin braced himself.

"Morgana." She looked up at him, and he braced himself. Had she gotten fired? She worked as a fashion consultant for an online merchandising company and loved every minute of it. Merlin had dutifully listened to all of her work stories, but a lot of it went over his head. "Hun, what's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong. Not for me, at least. I don't know how you'll feel about it."

"Um… then what's right?" The only thing he could think of was if she'd been transferred. Did they have to move? Merlin didn't want to do long–distance, but they'd get through it and he'd join her whenever he finished his fellowship.

Morgana was quiet for a long time, before she whispered, "I'm pregnant."

Merlin stared at her. Those were the very last words he expected to hear from her. All thoughts of moving away vanished from his mind and he was left with that single, startling piece of information.

It took him a moment to wrap his head around that, and once he did, he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her. "You're pregnant. I'm going to be a dad. You're gonna be a mom." He kissed her again.

"You're… you're not upset?"

"Upset? How could I be?"

"But you're still in your fellowship."

"I'll have like two months left when the baby is born." Merlin really couldn't make himself care about something as silly as his future when he was thinking about having a tiny son or daughter. It was a future he'd long since let go of.

"But we never talked about this." Morgana seemed to be under the impression that Merlin wasn't fully thinking this through.

"We didn't think we needed to," Merlin pointed out. "Oh my God. I have to call Arthur." Merlin frantically looked through his bag for his phone before he remembered it was in his pocket.

Morgana groaned. "You and Arthur gossip like old ladies." It didn't really upset her; she mostly found it amusing and, more than she could describe, she loved that Merlin had Arthur.

Merlin stuck his tongue out at her before he called Arthur. He didn't even wait for Arthur to say hello before he screamed, "MORGANA IS PREGNANT!" There was no answer on the other end. "Hello?" Merlin frowned. "He hung up on me."

"Maybe you made him go deaf," Morgana suggested.

Before Merlin could formulate a retort, there was a knock on the door. Merlin looked confused while he went to see who it was, and Morgana couldn't help her smile. Merlin was so oblivious. She knew who would be at the door. Sure enough, Gwen's squeal filled the room. "Where's Morgana?" They only lived across the street, so it was easy to go back and forth.

"Kitchen."

Once Gwen was gone, Arthur gave him a one–armed hug. His three–year–old, Hailey, was fast asleep in his arms. "Congrats, man. I'm happy for you."

"Tha –"

"YOU'RE PREGNANT TOO?!"

"There goes my news." Arthur chuckled.

"You're gonna be one of those people who have twenty kids, aren't you?"

"Me and Gwen want a big family but not that big. Besides, it's only our fourth."

"Yeah, and you're twenty–eight. You've got a decade of baby–making ahead of you."

"Please don't say baby–making."

Merlin grinned. "I think I might want a big family too. How do I break that to Morgana?"

"I think you just hope for a lot of happy accidents."

Merlin almost shoved Arthur before he remembered Hailey. "Where are Elian and Freya?"

"Freya's at a Girl Scout retreat, and Elian's at a sleepover."

"How are they old enough to be away for the night?" Merlin asked.

"I don't know. Gwen's been a mess about it."

"I am not a mess," Gwen argued. "It's just that my little babies don't need me and are spending the night away from me, and it's totally fine."

"They'll always need you, Gwen. Even if they don't realize it," Arthur assured her. "We should get Hailey to sleep. You called me when we were getting home, and I didn't want to wait to come over."

After another round of hugs, Arthur and Gwen left. Merlin wrapped his arms around Morgana. He couldn't wait to start this new chapter of their lives together.

Seven months later, Arthur and Merlin were standing by the half wall that separates the kitchen and the living room. Morgana and Gwen were sitting in the kitchen with their feet up and ice cream balanced on their swollen stomach. Morgana was due two days before Gwen, so they were practically in the same place in their pregnancies.

Morgana's pregnancy had really started to take its toll on her. Her body could only tolerate certain foods and she was exhausted all the time. Merlin wished he could take some of her burden, but for the next six weeks, all he could do was be supportive. Morgana's doctor had told her not to worry about what she ate. At this point in the baby's development it was just important that she was eating enough, not that she was eating healthy.

Merlin thought Morgana was more beautiful now than ever. When she felt self–conscious, he kissed away those thoughts. When she was upset because her hair was thinning and she had developed patches of rough skin, Merlin would weave his fingers through her hair and run his hands over her skin and swear to her that she was the most beautiful person on the planet to him.

That night, Igraine was watching the kids so Morgana and Gwen could complain about how their husbands didn't understand the pains of being pregnant. Well, Gwen was complaining; Morgana was bragging.

Apparently, Arthur wasn't as flexible with Gwen's cravings and mood swings as Merlin was. Merlin was the poster boy for the perfect husband. If Morgana woke him up at 3:00am and asked him to get her some weird combination of food the baby was asking for, Merlin didn't hesitate. He often came back with more than she asked for, which Morgana was endlessly appreciative of.

Merlin never tried to fix her pregnancy. If she needed to complain about how uncomfortable something made her, he listened and validated.

"You're making me look bad," Arthur whispered as they watched Gwen and Morgana eat.

"I can't help it. I want to do this stuff. For Morgana and for our baby."

"Wait until you're on your fourth kid. It won't be this exciting."

"Every child we have will be exciting and will be a miracle." Merlin looked at Morgana amazed. "I never thought I'd get to do this. Start a family with the woman I love."

"What do you mean?"

"I shouldn't be able to have kids. Most chemo patients end up infertile. With how intensive my therapy was, I assumed I would be one of them. That's how this happened in the first place."

"Oh." Arthur suddenly understood why Merlin was so over–the–top excited about this. "You never said."

"Yeah, it was hard enough to tell Morgana. I guess –"

"Merlin?"

Morgana immediately had his undivided attention. "Yes?"

"Do you think you could get some Oreos? I know it's late…"

"No worries," Merlin said quickly. "Do you want anything else?" He walked toward the table and grabbed her glass so he could refill it with water.

"No, that's it," Morgana assured him. She accepted the glass gratefully and blushed a little when he kissed her hand.

"Gwen, would you like anything?"

"Look at that. He's being polite and considering my poor pregnant feelings. Yes, I would like… hmmm…"

"Peanut butter!" Morgana suddenly suggested. "Oreos and peanut butter!"

"Ooh. That sounds lovely."

"If you think of anything else you want, call me." He kissed Gwen's cheek and then gave Morgana a short kiss.

He left, dragging Arthur with him. "How do you do that?"

"Do what?" Merlin asked obliviously.

"Act like you want to get them all that stuff."

"Because I do want to get them that stuff. I love Morgana. When she's upset, I'm upset. I hate that I can't do more to help her with this pregnancy. It's been rough on her, and she's creating this beautiful amazing life. Whatever I can do isn't enough."

"Oh that's good. I'm stealing that line next time Gwen tries to get me to sleep on the couch."

"Or you could try not acting like a prat, and I don't know… listen to your wife?"

They went back and forth the entire ride to the store.

Arthur expected an in and out, but Merlin got way more than they asked for. They left with marshmallows and gummy bears and pretzel sticks and Saltine crackers and strawberries.

"I didn't realize we were doing your grocery shopping. What are you doing?"

"I know Morgana. Trust me," Merlin told him.

"Overachiever."

"Prat."

When they got back, Morgana nearly cried when she saw the crackers. "I forgot we ran out of those. Thank you!"

She and Gwen dug into the strawberries immediately.

A month later, when Gwen was home with the kids, her water broke and she went into labor. Her labor escalated quickly. She called Morgana in a panic, who had hobbled to the living room where Merlin was reading.

Merlin ran ahead of Morgana so he could get to Gwen as quickly as possible. Merlin was working toward a specialization in oncology, but before he got his specialization, he'd gotten some experience with this. He'd mostly worked in internal medicine, but they'd all had to go to various departments, and he'd spent some time in the labor and delivery unit.

Gwen was silently crying and clutching her stomach. Hailey was hysterically crying, "mommy!" over and over again.

"Hey, sweetie," Merlin said gently as he knelt down. "Where's Elian?"

"Up–up–upstairs."

"Go to him. I'll take good care of your mommy, okay? Aunt Morgana will come up and see you when she gets here."

Merlin was a little surprised when Hailey listened right away; she must've been very scared.

"How far apart are your contractions?" Merlin asked.

Gwen shook her head. "Merlin, this is what it felt like when they told me to push," she whispered.

Merlin breathed. "Okay." He looked around and jumped to his feet. Everything he'd ever learned about delivering a baby ran through his head. Towels, he reminded himself. Clean towels. He grabbed them from the linen closet and looked around. He grabbed a pair of kitchen shears and rapidly washed them. Then he grabbed some twine from a drawer in their kitchen. He couldn't find gloves, and he didn't have enough time. It would have to be good enough.

He went back to Gwen. "Hey, are you ready to do this?"

"Can you?" she gasped out.

"You concentrate on the baby; I'll do the rest," he promised her.

Mentally apologizing to Arthur, he hitched up Gwen's skirt and pulled down her underwear. He squeezed his eyes shut for a split second. "Push, Gwen. Push."

Morgana walked in at that exact moment. "I called an ambulance." When she realized what was happening, she held Gwen's hands. It happened quickly. It took less than five minutes before the baby came out. He held the baby carefully with its head slightly lower than its legs.

"Check the time," Merlin ordered. In the back of his head, Merlin processed that Arthur had another son. Morgana passed him a clean towel and he carefully dried off the baby. They were still.

Merlin tried not to let his fear show. He carefully placed the baby on the ground and started to rub his chest and tap his feet. He didn't know if it would help with a newborn, but he'd been taught to do that when he spent some time in the NICU. When the baby still did not start to breathe, Merlin looked toward Morgana, taking strength from her.

He began to perform CPR. He'd only done CPR on a baby once and that baby had been a couple months old. He pushed that thought aside. He could do this; he had to. It was during his second set of CPR that the baby took his first breath. Shortly after came the glorious sound of a newborn cry. He could hear Gwen crying, but he focused on the baby. He tied off the umbilical cord as tightly as he could and cut it. Then, he handed the baby to Gwen.

When the ambulance arrived, it was to see the mess of childbirth surrounding a mother holding her very much alive son. Morgana got the baby bag while Merlin found the kids all huddled together in their room. He didn't know what he looked like – probably disgusting, but they still ran to him.

"Do you wanna go meet your brother?" he asked them.

They were uncharacteristically compliant as he loaded them into the car and got Hailey into her carseat. They drove behind the ambulance and called Arthur from the car.

The chorus of "dad" and "daddy" must've surprised Arthur, and Merlin didn't get past, "Gwen's on her way to the hospital" before Arthur hung up. He was no doubt doing whatever he needed to do to get out of work early

Merlin and Morgana were sitting in the waiting room with the kids when Arthur got there fifteen minutes later. "My wife. Guinevere Pendragon? Where is she?" He couldn't hide how frantic and scared he sounded.

Merlin didn't try to call out to Arthur; he needed to go to his wife and baby. Eventually, Igraine showed up and sat by them. Elian and her were playing something on her phone. Hailey fell asleep in Merlin's arms. Freya had originally fallen asleep on Morgana's stomach, but a kick from the baby had her relocating to Morgana's shoulder. Morgana was fast asleep as well, her head on Merlin's shoulder. Merlin couldn't sleep. He willed himself to rest but nothing could soothe his thoughts. This place still held so many bad memories for him; it was hard for him to believe that it could hold good ones as well.

It was hours before Arthur came out, and he spotted them right away. He had clearly been crying. Merlin carefully shifted Morgana trying his best not to wake her up. It didn't work. Sorry, he mouthed as he stood up. At least Hailey didn't stir. "What's wrong?" Merlin asked.

"You saved them," Arthur whispered. "They would have died. That's what the doctors told me. If you hadn't known what to do, they would have died."

"You don't know that."

"I do," Arthur said softly. "He… he's perfect, Mer, but they found out he has a heart condition. I don't know why they didn't find it before, but he… did you do CPR on him?" Merlin nodded and Arthur copied the motion. "That's what they said. They said that they were surprised you got him breathing. We've got a long road ahead, but thanks to you, we get to go down that road. We're calling him Merlin, you know."

"What?" Merlin asked stunned.

"We figured the best chance we could give him is to name him after the strongest person we know." Arthur threw his arms around Merlin, waking up Hailey in the process. She whined for a moment until she woke up enough to realize that it was Arthur who had woken him up.

"Daddy!" she wrapped her arms around him tightly; Arthur was impressed she didn't cut off his airflow. "Is mommy okay?"

"She is," Arthur promised her. "Because of Uncle Merlin, she and your brother are okay."

"What's his name?" Elian asked.

"It's Merlin."

"That's not gonna get confusing at all," Elian commented.

"Okay, okay. Do you wanna go see them?" Arthur turned to Igraine. "She's in 312." He let Igraine go ahead of him with Morgana and the kids.

"I seriously can't thank you enough."

"You don't need to thank me. I just did what anyone could do."

"No, you did what only my best friend could do." He hugged him again.

Two weeks later, Merlin and Morgana welcomed their son into the world. When Arthur and Gwen came in to see them, with little Merlin, they fawned over Merlin's son. "His name's Arthur," he said softly. Merlin carefully placed baby Arthur in his bassinet. "You know what to do."

Arthur laughed before he carefully picked up baby Merlin. He placed him next to baby Arthur in the bassinet. "It's the next generation." He couldn't stop smiling.

"Do you think they'll be best friends like us?" Merlin asked.

Arthur rested his arm across Merlin's shoulder. "No one can be friends like us, but they'll find their way."

As they stood there, looking at their tiny babies, Merlin couldn't help but muse that this moment never should have been possible. Their friendship had endured so many tragedies and ups and downs. They had survived the test of friendship. And in the end, that's all that really mattered to them.