I woke with a start. I struggled for a moment to remember who I was. A shaft of moonlight lit up the room. A full moon. It must have been the dead of night. I looked over to the other side of the bed. It was empty. I felt a creeping fear settle in my stomach. I couldn't explain why, but something felt wrong.
I slipped into my nightdress and lit a candle. It wasn't out of character for May to wander at night. In fact, it would have been out of character for her not to wander at night. She had gone off exploring, ever since I had known her. Nearly every night, I had heard her sneaking through the secret passageway, her footsteps echoing on the stone stairs and through the wainscotting under my bed. I had followed after her once, just to see what she got up to, but she had always been too quick, and I had never seen where she went. I had never spoken to her about it, for fear that she would drag me along and get me into even more trouble.
Something felt different tonight. I didn't want to let May go off alone. Not when she had been feeling so upset earlier. It didn't feel right to let my friend wander in the dark by herself.
Slowly, I eased the door of my bed chamber open, careful not to push it past that point where I knew it would creak. I didn't want to wake up Senelle in the next room. My hide wouldn't be so much as tanned, as flayed if she caught me out of bed in the middle of the night. I also didn't want to alert the Queen's blood-sworn, who had been standing watch outside the suite since this evening. Like all males in the queen's guard, he had powerful hearing. I had to be as quiet as a mouse.
Careful. I had to be careful not to disturb the rushes on the floor, slowly sneaking past the desk, the dark stain on the wood dried already, towards the bookcase in the main chamber. I had never gone into the secret passageway, but I knew where it must be. There was so little furniture in the room, that there was nowhere else to hide it. Still, how to open it was a mystery to me.
I began lifting books randomly, hoping to find a catch or a lever. They were all the dull books and scrolls that Senelle used to teach us facts and figures and sums. Some were foreign language books and story books, that May sometimes read. I was careful with each book, wary of the slight rustling sound each made when I removed it. Still, I started to get desperate, as each book failed to do anything, my movements getting a little more frantic each time.
Behind me, a light flickered underneath the door that led into the chamber, sending shadows dancing around the room. I froze in place, waiting for the door to be flung open. A moment passed, and nothing happened. Then, I heard voices and footsteps leading away from the door. Relief flooded through me. It was just the changing of the watch. It must be just after midnight then.
I looked back at the bookcase, examining every inch. All the books were books. They were all paper and vellum. None of them was a secret handle to open the passageway. I felt along the wood of the shelves, feeling for indents, anything, until I felt it. There, hidden in a knot in the wood, was a slightly raised bump. I pushed it down, until it recessed. I heard a slight click and stepped back, waiting for the passage to open. Nothing happened.
I felt again around the bookcase, pulling on it slightly, hoping to pull it open and expose the passageway. It wouldn't budge. It seemed immovable. I pressed the button a second time. This time, it didn't click. I screamed with frustration in my head, preparing to kick the damned bookcase, when I heard it.
It sounded like a shutter, banging softly in a breeze. Except I could see through the open window that the night air was still, with no clouds in sight, and the shutters were wide open. The banging was coming from the door across the chamber from my own. From May's room.
Quietly, oh so quietly, I crept over to the door. It was ajar, as if someone had opened it and been too afraid to close it properly, for fear of the noise the latch would make. I snuck through the slight opening, my candle dimly lighting the princess's bedroom.
It was similar to my own, except the bed was far grander, a four-poster, with green and black drapes. The bed sheets were pristine. Undisturbed. I raised my candle higher, lighting up more of the room. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary. All the princess's things were still in place. Except her slippers were gone. Where they normally sat, by her wardrobe, was empty. Other than that, the room was unchanged.
I heard another muffled thunk. Wood grazing softly against stone. It seemed to be coming from the corner. I knelt down next to the wardrobe, the stone of the floor cold against my skin. I could feel a slight breeze. Soft, like an otherworldly caress. I slid my fingers over the wainscotting. There. Part of the wainscotting was loose, a slight breeze from behind knocking it against the stone wall. I slowly eased it open, revealing an inky black passageway behind. It was more of a tunnel than a passageway, barely wide enough for a young girl to slip between the two walls. The walls of the passageway ran parallel to the walls of the suite, making it virtually undetectable from outside.
I climbed in, debating whether to leave the door open or closed. I didn't want to get locked in a dark space, where no one would be able to find me. However, I was afraid of what Senelle would do if she found me. My throbbing hand pulled the door shut. A slight click confirmed the door was now locked. Trapped. Only one way forward now.
I slid down the passageway, my hand on the candle shaking slightly. I could only move sideways, the passage was so narrow. My footsteps echoed slightly on the stone floor, up into the dark void above me. I moved slowly, inching forward, my breathing shallow, so I wouldn't catch myself on the dusty stone. Ahead of me, I could dimly make out another wall. A bend in the passageway. To my left, the passage disappeared down a set of steps, descending into the dusty gloom. In the candlelight, I could just make out a stripe in the middle of the dust on the floor, where small feet had brushed aside the dust many times before me. Bracing myself with my free hand on the wall, I stepped down into the dark.
The sounds of my footsteps bounced back to me, strange and garbled. My tongue felt so big in my mouth, swollen by fear. I shouldn't be here. I could get lost. Trapped. No one would know where I had gone. I fought the urge to put my thumb in my mouth, wrapping my hand around me instead, my other still holding the flickering candle. It had only been a little stub to start with, the remains of my bedside night light. It was now mostly melted to the bottom of the lamp.
I had tried to count the number of steps as I went down, but had lost count at over two hundred. Occasionally, an opening appeared to the left or right, but they were all sealed with big heavy doors. Likely to other rooms in the castle. At one point, I had passed under a big metal grate, like the gate of an oubliette, a gloomy light trickling through the bars. The deeper I got, the moister the walls got, the stones turning green with moss and decay by the light of the flickering candle. Every now and then, I saw a small footprint in the wet mud on the floor.
Suddenly, my foot splashed into a puddle, the water cold against my bare skin. The stairs had levelled out into a tunnel, hewn from bare rock. I must have been below the foundations of the castle by now. A cold, damp breeze ruffled my hair. I shivered and followed May's footprints into the cold and dark.
Rivulets of water ran down the sides of the tunnel. In places, dirt seemed to shine through. Dirt and tree roots. Some of the tree roots seemed to grow up, instead of down, bursting through the soil, like grave worms. The tunnel itself curved around and about, like a coiling snake. I must be far from the castle now, running under the moat and towards the forest. Water dripped from the ceiling, pooling on the floor, before running down into the cracks between the rocks.
Suddenly, a drop landed on the candle. With a hiss, the tunnel was plunged into darkness, the cloying, smoky smell of damp tallow filling the air.
I gave a small sob. I could feel the oppressive weight of the tunnel, the rock around me, pressing in from the sides. The plop of the water through the murky blackness. I could almost feel eyes looking at me. Monsters from the stories May liked to read. Worse, how would I get back? I clutched my useless night light to my chest at the thought of going all the way back in the dark, pushing through the narrow crawl spaces and getting stuck. My eyes began to burn with tears. I wished that I was still safe in my bed. I wished that May hadn't run off.
More than that, though, more than my fear of the dark, my fear of being trapped by myself, most of all, I was afraid that May had run away and left me forever. I couldn't stand the thought of her having left me by myself, as she ran away into the forest, or to the centre of the world, or wherever the tunnel led. Wherever she had been going every night.
I clutched the lantern tighter to my chest, before letting it fall to the floor. I would be brave. I could be adventurous, like May. I placed a hand on the clammy wall. I would follow it forward and, I felt certain, wherever it ended up, May would be too.
When the marks burn bright, she sees it sometimes. The other place. So different to the darkness she has known always. A swirling place of colours and sounds. It's from the other place she hears voices. So different. So new. So alive. She hates it. She craves it. It makes her realise her aloneness. Isolation. Lost. Always lost. Flesh tastes different. Fresh. Fearful. Not like here. Rotten. Bad. One taste is enough. Never again. Lay the trap. Spin the web. Savour it, keep it. Crave. Desire. Snap the wings off. Can't get away. Watch it squeal. Pleading. Open wide. Swallow it whole.
Slowly, the tunnel seemed to edge upwards again. The only way I could tell was from the way it got harder to walk forward, my breath getting more laboured as every step got steeper and steeper. The stones grew softer beneath my bare feet. The air seemed fresher as well. I shrieked, as something brushed over my face. I pushed it away, but it was only a vine. In the distance, I could make out a light green speck, far above me. Light. An end to the tunnel. I scrabbled towards it, slipping and sliding over the moss-covered stones.
As I got closer, the soft light lit up the passage with a green glow. A small stream trickled down the centre of the tunnel, rushing over smooth, moss-covered stones, before disappearing into cracks and holes in the sides. The walls were no longer stone, but lined with twisting roots and strangling vines, a pale green flower grew amongst the vines, lending the passageway it's green glow. Further along, the passageway opened out into the air, a cool breeze kissing my skin. I rushed forward, eager to be out of the tunnel, eager to be out of the darkness.
A twangling of instruments greeted me, soft, barely audible, yet jarring about my ears. My ears twitched, instinctively searching for the source of the sound, whilst I took in the clearing I had emerged into. The tunnel had come out into the forest, far from the castle. I could just see the moonlit battlements through the trees on the distant shore of the lake. I had emerged from an old escape tunnel, just above the pond that May and I had been playing in.
I followed the strange music from the tunnel mouth and towards the shore of the lake. It was discordant, not loud but with many contrasting melodies, all competing with one another. Over the waters of the lake, I could see many lights flittering, darting down to the waters and then swooping back up to join the rest, hundreds of lights, all dancing together. I sat on a knoll just above the water, underneath a holly tree and watched the lights.
It was the Little Folk. Each of the lights was a tiny lantern, carried by a faerie. Their delicate wings shone in the faerie lights, green, purple, red and blue. Sometimes dancing together, in a strident duet. Sometimes alone, but still part of the greater whole. On the side of the lake were musicians, pixies and the folk of the forest, along with a chorus of frogs, all adding their voices to the music.
The sights and sounds of the faerie dance took my breath away, chasing away all other thoughts and feelings. I was content just to sit a moment. Not to interrupt, but just to watch, wide-eyed.
Yet, as I watched and listened, the music changed. All the discordant sounds died away, until only a single violin remained. It played a sad but sweet melody. A lullaby and a lament. I felt it speak right to my heart. As each mournful note pealed away, the faeries joined together, and, fell apart, forming a circle of lights in the air, in the centre of which danced two faeries with wings of gold and silver. Together, they danced over the water, their movements fluid and graceful. As the strings grew stronger, so too did their dancing become more strident. When the strings rose to a crescendo, the orchestra returned, along with a voice of pure innocence. I couldn't make out the words, but I understood the feeling of longing and love. Innocence and lost. A song to the stars. I looked up, with tears in my eyes, and found myself looking into the eyes of a predator.
"They can't have gone far, your majesty. I'm sure they're alright."
"How could you let her run off again? You were supposed to be guarding her Jorsin. Why didn't you keep her confined to her bedroom? You're supposed to be the best warrior in all Erilea. How could you be bested by a twelve year old girl?"
"I can only apologise majesty. I can assure you that no one has gone in or out of this door."
"She can't have vanished into thin air. This is my daughter, you wretched male. Find her and find her now. Knowing that girl, she's running amok about the castle grounds by now. Make yourself useful and actually search for her."
"Of course. At once."
With a haunting cry, a falcon with auburn coloured feathers shot from the castle window into the night sky.