Day of the Jackanapes Sideshow Bob returns! And tries to hypnotise Bart into killing Krusty after he erased all the tapes of episodes featuring Sideshow Bob when he worked on his show.
Plot
Moe appears on a parody of Who wants to be a millionaire.
Cue dramatic music and whoever America has instead of Chris Tarrent.
And life lines and four choices of answer to each question.
Dramatic music.
"We are here with Moe Syzlak who is playing for one million dollars." said the host. Um Virgil. Yes.
Moe didn't know the answer, but when the host repeated the answers, Barney in the audience coughed in the answer he knew was right and suddenly Moe knew that was the answer and guessed.
He wins. and no one twigged he cheated and he defrauded a quiz show out of a million dollars.
"He cheated! My local bartender and friend cheated!" Homer gasped.
Lenny sighed like he did not care. "Meh..."
However the show is stealing ratings from Krusty.
Krusty has a meeting with his executives about suggestions.
"This show is stealing ratings!" said Krusty.
"Maybe your show should be more like Who wants to be a gazillionaire?"
"This is a quiz show! I'm running a kids show! Two completely different things!" said Krusty.
However two executives keep bothering him with ridiculous suggestions.
Krusty escapes them on a studio cart but they try to cling on until he hits their hands with his shoe and they let go.
"You can't kill an executive producer! We're immortal!" Yelled the executives.
"Leave me alone!" Krusty yelled.
Later Krusty is doing an Italian restaurant sketch but the two executives annoy him again. He has a breakdown and storms off. They chase after him. He shoots them.
"Hey if you kill me, two more will replace me! Aaaaaugh!" The annoying executive said while dying. He multiplied like the heads of a hydra into two more annoying executives. Actually they heal like the liquid metal terminator from Terminator 2.
"Hey! That's my thing!" said the hydra from Greek mythology.
...
Later he is having an interview with Kent Brockman. He explains he deleted or taped over old episodes. "Nothing important was really on them except Sideshow Bob..." Krusty explained. However in Springfield Penitentiary Sideshow Bob was listening...
"You erased my past?! Now I shall erase your future!" Sideshow Bob ranted.
"Hey pipe down in there..." A guard told him off.
"Of course all my new sketches aren't about dirty words anymore Kent. Just words that sound dirty... hehehe! Like muck-luck! Hehehehe!" said Krusty chuckling.
Kent chuckled as well. "Oh Krusty..."
At the Simpsons Bart said Krusty should be careful his show doesn't get stale and repetitive.
"Oh my god! Maggie shot Mr Burns again!" Smithers ran in screaming.
The Simpsons stared blankly at him.
"Um never mind." said Smithers. He left.
Hugo winced.
Later Sideshow Bob got released. Again. This town is insane...
And he got a job undercover as a Groundskeeper to replace Willie as his undead ghoul wasn't doing much good and constantly reminding everyone that he wanted revenge for his gruesome death in Treehouse of Horror VI.
However Skinne liked Sideshow Bob's voice that he made him the morning announcement instead.
"You have a lovely voice! Just like that guy on Frasier! I want you to do the morning announcements!" said Skinner.
"Charmed!" Bob smiled touched by his compliment.
Bart was in class when a familiar voice on the tannoy had an announcement for him to go to the janitor's shed immediately. Along with a familiar ominous tune.
Nyaaaaaagh! Sideshow Bob!" Bart screamed.
"Bart stop screaming in class and do as your told!" Mrs Krabappel told him off.
Skinner added an announcement for Bart to obey the announcement from Sideshow Bob.
"Oh and the French club picnic has been cancelled. (Bob says something in French.)" said Bob.
A French boy dressed as a stereotypical mime onion seller wearing a beret, a red neckerchief and a striped top screamed in anguish.
"I said no screaming in class Jacques!" Mrs Krabappel told him off.
...
Meanwhile at the Simpsons house because he was truanting, Oscar was watching Krusty.
"Hey hey kids! Three cheers for Madame Mim and her cheese seeking poodles! Hooahahahaha!" said Krusty.
Oscar and Wart/Prince Arthur screamed as the wicked hag Madame Mim was on the Krusty show despite her hatred of sunlight. She put poodles in her magic bottomless satchel.
"No Oscar! Madame Mimi!" Bart at school groaned.
"I misread a spelling mistake on the script and went with it because of my silliness! Okay?!" said Oscar.
"Why are you truanting...?" Bart sighed.
"Why aren't you?" said Oscar.
"And why is Disney's Prince Arthur here?" Bart asked.
"I don't know... a sight gag?" said Oscar.
"Oscar get back to school at once young man!" Marge told off Oscar.
Oscar sighed and headed back to school.
Elsewhere Moe was on a quiz show winning money again.
"All right, Moe Szyslak." said Virgil.
"Yes, Virgil." said Moe.
"Yesterday, we asked if you wanted to risk it all for $500,000. And you stalled for 20 minutes." said Virgil.
"Yes. Yes, I did. I was told to." said Moe. You're not supposed to reveal the backstage coaching...
"Hey, that's great. But now we must have your answer... in the next 10 or 15 minutes." said Virgil.
[Crowd gasps] "Ooh."
"You want some of this? Well, do ya? I can honestly say I do." said Moe light heartedly threatening the crowd.
"All right then! For half a million dollars... which of the following is not a subatomic particle?" Virgil asked.
The answer was bonbon. Moe didn't this though so he used his phone a friend to ask Homer, figuring as a nuclear safety inspector he'd know the answer,
However Homer told a daft story using the birds and the bees analogy with atoms so Lisa took the phone and said the answer was bonbon.
Moe said bonbon and won again.
...
Bart worried went to the janitor's shed where of course Sideshow Bob was waiting.
He disturbed some bats. They fluttered about startling him.
One of the bats was Ace, Oscar's vampire friend in bat form.
"Hello Bart!" said Bob. His theme tune played again.
"Yaaaaagh! Sideshow Bob!" Bart screamed as he was locked in.
Sideshow Bob laughed maniacally while Bart frantically fiddled with the doorknob trying to escape.
Eventually he calmed down. "Ok what are you gonna do this time... Maim me with gardening equipment? Because I bet before lunchtime you'll be back in prison..."
Bob chuckled. "Oh I have a special plan involving you..." he ties Bart to a chair. "I won't be killing you today Bart. But you will be killing Krusty the Clown! Gahahahaha!"
Bart gasped horrified. "And how do you intend to make me do that?!" Bart said in disbelief as he would never harm Krusty.
"By hypnotising you with this red spiral." Sideshow Bob explained.
"Uh, hypnosis doesn't actually work... it's a load of baloney!" Bart retorted.
"Oh Bart, quick to not believe in things are we? Oh but you will believe Bart, oh you will..." Sideshow Bob started the spiral spinning. Unfortunately for Bart it worked and put him in a trance.
Elsewhere Jackanapes attacked.
"They're a crossbreed of a jackalope and a canapé." said Oscar.
Anyway so the canapé/jackalope hybrids hopped about everywhere.
Jackanapes also means a mischievous child. Like Oscar. Or a tame monkey or chimp. So it's the Day of the Apes too!
"Damn dirty apes! You maniacs!" Oscar yelled.
Ace the vampire kid winced.
Anyhoo this frankly weird day of sentient canapés and damn dirty apes was on the news along with other absurd stories. Oh and Krusty had retired again.
"Krusty the Clown's retirement has provoked an outpouring of anguish... not seen since the small plane crash that killed the Banana Splits." said Kent reading the news.
Oscar screamed in anguish and cried.
The Simpsons minus Bart groaned exasperated.
...
At the Power Plant.
"Simpson! You're fired!" Mr Burns fired Homer again.
"No! Please! Where else am I going to find a job where I can take an hour-long nap everyday and they don't mind?" Homer cried.
"You take an hour-long nap everyday?" Mr Burns gasped.
"Yeah. And you don't mind!" said Homer stupidly.
"I very much do mind! I was just unaware!" Mr Burns was cross with him.
"Uh oh..." said Homer.
Sideshow Bob took Bart out for the day to test his loyalty. Skinner didn't question why the new groundskeeper absconded the school grounds with a student.
"Now to see if you will really attack your hero." said Bob.
Bart immediately started attacking a model of Krusty with a baseball bat when prompted.
"Oh! Work that groin! In the words of that old crone Burns, what was it he would always say? Excellent!" said Sideshow Bob.
Meanwhile at home, Oscar had to pee.
"Uh oh! Gotta pee!" said Oscar running off to the bathroom.
"Couldn't you try to say whiz? Pee sounds so dirty..." said Teddy.
"No cos that'll make upset the Cheez-Wiz people..." said Oscar.
"Oh yeah..." said Teddy, Oscar's living teddy bear.
Sentient tubes of Cheez-Wiz were offended. "Well I never!" said one of them in a posh voice.
Oscar giggled. "Now that's silly..."
Up in the attic Hugo was experimenting. Suddenly he a headache and quick flashing visions of Bart and Sideshow Bob.
"Bart's in danger!" said Hugo.
"No you're in danger, said Willie Nelson the onion spider thing from Aqua Teen Hunger Force.
...
The Simpsons were worried about Bart.
Oscar came in.
"Why is everyone still up?" He asked.
"We're all worried about Bart." said Marge.
"Oh he went to Willie's shed for some reason and then left before history with Sideshow Bob." Oscar explained.
Everyone gasped. "Sideshow Bob?!"
"Bart's in danger! We have to hurry!" Lisa yelled.
Suddenly Bart walked in and spoke in trance.
"Hello mother... hello father..." said hypnotised Bart.
"There you are young man! Where were you?! We were so worried!" Marge scolded Bart.
"I was... I was..." Bart stuttered.
"If anyone asks you were at the flower shop." said Sideshow Bob in a thinking cloud,
"I was at the flower shop." said Bart handing over flowers.
"Oh! How sweet!" said Marge. She took the flowers.
Lisa hmmmmed. She was suspicious of Bart.
Homer sweated as he had been somewhere he wasn't supposed to. Drinking at Moe's probably.
"I was also at the flower shop. Yep getting drunk at the old flower shop..." said Homer.
Marge sighed at his lie.
"He's telling the truth. Moe's shut early so he went to the flower shop early and ate all the tulips!" said Oscar.
"Mmmmmm... secret shame..." said Homer eating a tulip.
Oscar laughed.
Marge sighed.
Plot 2
After this meeting Lisa stopped Bart.
"Okay Bart. What are you playing at?!" said Lisa.
"Nothing my dear sister," said Bart.
Lisa slapped him. "The real Bart would have thrown me through a window for doing that!" Lisa yelled.
"He'd defenestrate you?!" Bart asked.
Lisa growled.
"I'll handle this Lis." said Oscar. "This statement is a lie."
"But if it's a lie it must be true. But if it true it's a lie. Error! Error! Illogical! Illogical!" Bart malfunctioned and exploded.
"Cooool!" said Hugo.
Oscar smirked.
"He was a robot?!" Lisa gasped. "Then that means the real Bart is still in danger! We must hurry!"
"But I'm getting a perm!" Homer with one hair curler wrapped in his three remaining hairs whined.
Oscar laughed.
They were all driving about town while Lisa explained where Bart could possibly be.
"What the deuce is a Sideshow Bob?" Hugo asked.
"He's Bart's mortal enemy. It's a long story Hugo..." said Lisa.
"Kids we've been driving in circles where could Bart be?" Homer asked.
"Hmmmmmm... Wait! Krusty is holding his final show tonight!" said Oscar.
"To Krustylu Studios! And step on it!" said Lisa.
"That's the way I like to drive!" Homer eagerly drove recklessly.
The kids yelped.
"Homer I know Bart's in danger but sheesh!" Marge yelled.
"Is it a bad time to mention I get nauseous on rollercoasters?" Hugo cried.
"Yes!" cried the Simpsons.
"Eeewwww!" Oscar cried.
...
Elsewhere Moe was rich now so there was a subplot where paid off his debts to various thumb taking weirdos including Fat Tony, possibly. He also refurbished the bar.
Lenny, Carl, Barney etc celebrated.
"For he's a jolly good fellow..." they sang and drank.
Moe sighed wearing jewellery.
Then the tavern phone rang.
"Yello? Moe speaking. Moe's tavern, birth place of the Rob Roy."
"Is there an Anita there? Anita Spanking?" asked the caller.
"Anita? Anita Spanking? Hey everybody! Anita Spanking! (I need a spanking)" said Moe.
Everyone laughed.
"Oh Moe you randy-" Barney laughed.
Moe figured some punk kid was pranking him again.
He made a violent threat at them down the phone again.
Oscar was the prank caller using a pay phone somewhere.
He laughed as the phone cut out.
At Moe's Moe sighed.
"Oz get in the car!" Homer yelled.
There were also liquid metal terminator executive producers and Roger Slifer and John Frink.
"Destroy! Destroy! We have notes! How about a Seinfeld restaurant?" chanted the executive producer terminators.
"Come with me if you want to script..." said Arnold Schwarzenegger to celebrities annoyed by the executive producer terminators.
"Glavin! How about we kill off a major character? gahoy!" said Frink the executive producers.
"And what would that achieve?" Sam Simon sighed.
Executive Producer Frink made sad Frink sounds.
Anyway Bob got out again because of his whining at parole.
"These shower sandals are too small for my oversized feet." He had some kind of horrid gunk on the soles of his feet.
"The prison book club consists of inmates clubbing me with the books. These bruises are from one of Tom Clancy's novels. I assure you the beating was just as painful as reading him..." He had square bruises.
"Yeah, his first person shooter war simulation gun games are crap compared to Medal of Honour and Call of Duty, and they are overrated..." said Oscar at his parole.
"Bedtime is at 7. They stay up till 9 at Chinos." Bob continues.
"Now Bob I have spoken to the warden there and that simply isn't true..." said the warden.
"And Oscar mixed my colours with my whites so I know have pinks!" Bob held up some pink briefs.
Everyone laughed.
However they released him as usual.
...
They went to Krustylu studios as Oscar was able to track that Bart and Bob were heading there.
Krusty was holding a final episode before retiring because he was fed up with the annoying executives interfering.
And Mr Teeny did a strip tease in golden pants!
"Thank you, folks. Now fasten your funny belts... as our own Chimpendale's dancer... gives you the full monkey!" said Krusty.
Mr Teeny in gold pants dances to I believe in miracles while stripping.
The Full Monty theme plays.
"Take it off!" Homer heckled.
Hugo face palmed embarrassed.
Then Tiny Tim From HOMR or whatever I called it made a cameo. The made up Simpsons kid asking Homer for some candy.
"Ahehehe. Krusty promised the children's hospital a genorous donation. But we haven't seen a nickel, have we Tim?" I don't care if the script calls him Frances.
"No." Said Tiny Tim.
"Why you little! (Yiddish swearing)" Krusty yelled.
Everyone gasped.
"Um roll the clips..." said Krusty.
He showed clips from his youth as a TV clown.
"Look at me. I'm Kaputnik, the Russian satellite. [Gasps] Oh, the Bolshoi's doing the Nutcracker in my pants!"
Oscar screamed with laughter.
Everyone else found the joke crude.
Bart came on with bombs attached to him and detonators in his hands.
"Oh look who it is! My biggest fan Bart! Come here you!" said Krusty.
"Oh no!" Marge gasped.
"Bart's got some sort of device on him! Krusty no! Don't let him hug you!" Oscar warned.
Luckily Mr Teeny was aware and jumped down and grabbed the bombs off of Bart and threw them into a room where they exploded.
"Oh my!" Mel gasped. "Was anyone hurt?"
"No just some executives..." Krusty explained.
There was blobs of liquid metal on the floor, it merged into the executives again. They talked in a legion voice of even more annoying suggestions.
"We have notes! How about a cameo from Dustin Hoffman!"
"Nyaaaagh! Terminators!" Oscar yelled.
"Curses! Foiled by a flea ridden simian!" Sideshow Bob ranted. "Nevermind! I'll just have to do things myself!" He took out a sniper rifle.
"Krusty he's got a gun!" Oscar warned him.
"My assistant may not be armed but he still is under my command as well! Bart kill Krusty!" Sideshow Bob yelled as he tried to shoot Krusty but missed. "Curses!"
Bart ripped a pipe off a wall and approached Krusty menacingly in a trance.
"Bart no! Snap out of it" Oscar yelled.
"That's it! Oscar you have to snap your fingers! That's the only way to break a hypnotic trance!" Lisa explained.
"But I can't snap my fingers! I tried and just can't do it!" Oscar whined.
"Oh brother..." Lisa got on stage and snapped her fingers. Bart stopped and returned to normal.
"What happened?!" He asked.
"Sideshow Bob was controlling you!" Oscar explained.
"Oh." said Bart.
"What now?" Lisa asked.
"We've got to stop Sideshow Bob!" Oscar replied.
...
Krusty fled backstage and ended up on the roof. However Sideshow Bob followed him.
"Bob! Hey hey! Perhaps we can come to some sort of arrangement?" Krusty suggested but Bob wasn't listening. He had a cold murderous look in his eyes. However he stepped on a rake and it slapped him in the face.
"I don't have time for you!" Bob threw the rake aside.
Bart, Lisa and Oscar arrived in their superhero costumes.
"Stop right there, Bob!" Bartman declared. Sirens blared and searchlights blinded Bob.
Oscar suddenly broke out into song and sang Stop right now by the Spice Girls.
Bart glared at him.
"Sideshow Bob you're under arrest! We have you completely surrounded!" Wiggum called up to him with a megaphone.
"By Lucifer's beard!" Sideshow Bob yelled. "I will not fail this time!"
"Bob drop your weapon or be shot." Wiggum warned him.
"Never!" Sideshow Bob yelled. He shot Krusty but some liquid metal formed a bullet proof box around him. The liquid metal was the executive terminators.
"You saved me?!" Krusty explained.
"Now how about a sitcom?" The executives asked.
"Nooooo!" Krusty jumped off the roof and landed on people before getting up and running away.
"Have you considered Dave Chappell? Destroy! Destroy!" said the liquid metal terminator executive producers.
Bart and Lisa winced exasperated.
Sideshow Bob was arrested by the police.
Later in prison Sideshow Bob was laughing madly as he was put in solitary confinement in a special secured cell.
At home.
"Well I'm glad I'm no longer in a trance doing Sideshow Bob's bidding..." said Bart.
"And once again we've foiled his evil plan." said Lisa.
"I wanna hypnotise Bart into acting like a chicken!" said Oscar.
"No! No more hypnosis!" said Bart.
Oscar pouted.
"Well Let's all go home..." said Homer.
...
Later.
"Mom, remember when Dad killed Ann Landers?" Hugo asked.
Marge seethed. "Yes dear I thought I said we wouldn't speak of that."
"Well he just bought home a woman called Mrs Bellamy and killed her..." said Hugo.
Marge seethed at Homer.
Homer is a serial killer now.
Homer not noticing her was drinking his beer.
There was then a daft news story on because Bart and !isa were watching the news.
"Michelle Kwan Finally Dishonours Family." said Kent.
It makes sense because she makes a cameo in a later episode.
"Abraham Lincoln squirrel abdicates from chair of the nut room." said Kent.
Bart winced.
And the Liquid metal terminator executive producers were still annoying celebrities with stupid suggestions.
Later Bart arrived Home very late.
"Where have you been, young man? It's nearly bedtime." Marge was cross with him.
"Well..." said Bart.
"I don't wanna hear any excuses Bartholomew! Now get ready for bed! And no tuck in time!" said Marge cross with him.
Bart was sad about tuck in time.
Plot 3
In canon Krusty invited the Simpsons to a fancy restaurant for dinner I think. To celebrate.
"Okay but I still have to get rid of those weird executive producers, Slumdog Millionaire Moe for cheating at Who Wants to be a millionaire and there's a clown story for filler involving Yugioh..." said Oscar.
Bart winced.
Well everyone was getting ready. Marge was combing Bart's spikes. He was annoyed by this and once she dismissed him to comb Hugo's spiked hair he messed up his hair into his usual style.
Homer was shooing the cheese whiz people out of the house again.
And Grouchy Smurf upset Bigmouth Tamaki again.
"I hate Bigmouth!"
Oscar's dead older sister who was somehow alive yet again cried.
"He meant Bigmouth the giant who is a reoccurring character in our show..." said Brainy Smurf.
Oscar was doing the things he said he needed to do now Bob was defeated.
First off was dealing with the T-1000 liquid metal terminator Executive Producers.
"How about an Italian cafe sketch with gingham table clothes! Destroy! Destroy!" said the Liquid metal terminator executive producers.
Oscar summoned T-850 Arnold terminator clones.
"Hasta la vista baby, I am the good guy now..." said the Arnolds.
"Well for some reason I'm the antagonist behind the annoying Executive Producers." said Yami Yugi. "I summon Slifer! The Executive Producer!"
"I think you mean Slifer the Sky Dragon..." Oscar winced.
"Executive produce thiiiiiiis!" Slifer attacked his life points directly. By executive producing them. Whatever that means.
Then Sideshow Bob got out again.
"Honestly the police force here..." Oscar sighed.
...
At the posh restaurant. Possibly the Gilded Truffle.
"Oh! Ruffians! Certainly no- Oh I'm sorry, you're with Krusty..." the snooty maitre D didn't want the Simpsons in his restaurant until he saw they were with Krusty.
"My usual seat with a window side view of the lady's gym. Prrrrrrr!" said Krusty.
"Eeeeeeeeew!" Lisa groaned.
"Certainly Krusty." said the maitre D.
Bart studied the wine. "No! No! No! No! My god! What passes for a wine list these days! Mon Dieu!"
"Bart stop trying to impress everyone. In ten minutes you'll soon be trying to entertain with armpit noises..." Hugo sighed.
Sideshow Bob was then brought in by cops under strict custody.
"Bob has something to say Krusty." said Wiggum sharply to Sideshow Bob.
"I'm sorry for trying to kill you Krusty." said Bob.
"Oh will you stop with the apologies! Hehehehe! Bob every time you try to kill me, my ratings go through the roof! And thanks for killing those annoying executive producers!" Krusty was strangely delighted by Bob trying to kill him because it boosted his ratings.
"Still doesn't bring back the Banana Splits..." Oscar sobbed. Yes those annoying cartoon puppets...
Bart winced exasperated at him.
Then for some reason Wiggum decided enough was enough with Bob's crimes, that he decided he should be beheaded in a French guillotine. In front of everyone in the restaurant...
"Revolution... revolution... honhonhon!" Oscar was doing a French accent.
Bart glared at him.
Homer was then eating all the bread rolls.
Hugo sighed embarrassed.
Then Bob was spared on the account of being the reoccurring antagonist.
"Yeah so I'll be back soon in a later adventure. Mwuhahahaha!" said Bob.
Bart groaned and read the menu.
...
Then Oscar's duel with Yami Yugi continued. Or they had a best of two thingy.
"I summon Slifer! The executive producer!' Yami summoned Roger Slifer.
"First off it's Slifer the Sky Dragon and no. You can't summon an Egyptian God Card without tributing three monsters..." Oscar sighed.
"Fine I summon Kuriboh the living hair ball and two liquid metal terminator Executive Producers..." said Yami Yugi.
"Okay since I'm starting another week of Clown rehab therapy despite not being a drunk clown because Skinner thought a room of depressed clowns on drugs etc would be fun for me and my clown obsession... I summon Grim from Grim adventures dressed as a clown." Oscar summoned Grim from when he dressed as a clown to get Billy to stop being scared of clowns. His robes were purple with green spots, he had a red shiny clown nose and a yellow wig like Marge's beehive with orange stripes.
"That's pretty basic. At least throw out a trap card..." Yami Yugi sighed.
"Yeah anime or Japanese cartoons are popular in the west now..." Hugo sighed.
"I then summon Clown Mandy from Grim adventures who uses her bossiness to bring back clown Grim..." said Oscar.
Mandy had a blue curly wig on and a round orange shiny clown nose.
She honked her clown nose. It squeaked.
Oscar giggled.
Elsewhere it rained green poisonous monkeys.
"Narrator stop doing that..." Bart groaned.
Oscar then sacrificed Clown Grim and Clown Mandy to summon "Irwin hastily dressed in Clown Grim's wig and nose and make up and their costumes because a crazed Billy was chasing them with Grim's scythe."
Angry Billy and Yugi's monsters beat up Clown Irwin.
"Fine... I summon Clown Verne from UBOS..." said Oscar. Verne from UBOS turned himself into a clown again...
"Stop using the flippin clown spell at Canadian Hogwarts you dork!" Bart groaned.
"It's called Vonderland..." Verne sighed.
The end.