Verity

His lips were soft yet demanding, the kiss tasting and hungry.

The world froze around me, and all senses went silent. I couldn't hear the noise of the continued scout's party just a few buildings away. I no longer felt the chill of the night or the heaviness in the air of the incoming storm. My consciousness focused on one thing and one thing alone—Captain's lips on mine.

His fingers gripped my chin, tilting my head up, giving him better access, as his other hand curled around my waist, and he pulled me closer. Pressed against him, I melted, ravishing in every slow brush of his lips, of the buzzing warmth that spread through each part of me he touched. He bit my lower lip, pulling at it softly. I gasped, overwhelmed by the mixture of pain and the striking desire that shot through my core. Taking my response as an invitation, Captain deepened the kiss. His tongue touched mine, and I couldn't fight the shiver that ran down my spine and curled in my belly.

His kiss undid me, uncoiling all the tension and frustration of the past months. All the unsaid things, stolen glances, burning touches, distrust, hatred, and betrayal poured into this kiss, walking the line between hurt and comfort. That duality of pleasure and hurt, sorrow and exhilarating joy cut me like razor-sharp blades, intensifying each touch of our lips.

I lost myself in that kiss, allowing desire to take control of my body while my mind soaked in a delicious fluff of endorphins. Captain moved us until my back hit the wall. His hand glided along my jawline and sneaked into my loose braid, fingers curling into a fist at the roots of my hair. His other hand tightened on my waist, making me arch into him even more. Fire sprawled through my insides at the strength of his grip on me. Like he was afraid I would disappear. Like he wouldn't allow me to.

His hand moved to my waist, and my shirt curled up. His fingers brushed the naked skin of my side, and my body went dead still. Locked in his fiery embrace, I suddenly had to fight to stay in the moment, to remember who was holding me and kissing me. It was the Captain, the person I trusted with my life. He would never hurt me. He wasn't my captor. He was my reward.

Yet, as the kiss continued, my mind went blank, as it would do when I needed to escape what was happening to me. My lips numbed, and the feel of Captain's hands on me had suddenly lost its delicious warmth. As fear rose, my heartbeat sped up, devastation following suit. My feelings twisted and turned, mashing together until they coiled into an indistinguishable mess. Desire clashed with painful memories, and wishes broke on the hurtful experiences of the past. Suddenly, it was not the Captain who was kissing me. It was my captor once more. I could practically hear his voice whisper into my ear, his hot breath tickling as he moved above me, reaping me apart in more ways than he could've ever known.

I couldn't breathe. My body locked, tension spreading through every muscle like venom. I squeezed my eyes shut, fighting the onslaught of unwanted associations but losing that battle miserably. I couldn't do it. It was bigger than me, stronger too. I had no power over my own damned thoughts. How could I fight with my consciousness and win?

Captain broke the kiss and pulled back, noticing my change of heart in a matter of seconds. I expected him to jump back, walk away, and maybe even apologize. But he did none of that. Instead, he took one look at me and pulled me back to his chest. His arms curled around me, locking me in place. His hand moved to the back of my head, stroking my hair as he hugged me tight. I wheezed into his jacket, trying to catch my breath, as he whispered something comforting. We stayed there for a long moment; me trying to pull myself back together and the Captain holding the pieces out for me to glue back. With his arms wrapped around me, my panic slowly subsided, and my vision cleared. Soon, I relaxed into him, enjoying the closeness once more.

"I'm sorry," I whispered, feeling horrible about my breakdown.

"Stupid brat," he said back hoarsely. No matter the harshness of his words, the delivery didn't hold any bite. Or maybe I knew the Captain too well at this point that I could see through his act. "Come, let's get you back to HQ. It will rain soon."

Thunder rocked the sky, and the flash of lightning illuminated the streets as if they were in broad daylight. I shivered, the hairs on my body standing on end from the electricity in the air. And I was only half-sure it was from the storm and not the Captain walking by my side.

As we cleared the last street before the scout's castle grounds, the raindrops started to fall around us, small and lazy. The wind gushed, and my hair flipped around my face, the braid practically undone from the recent… activities. I still couldn't believe what had happened. We kissed. Captain kissed me! And then I freaked the fuck out, and everything just stopped. I sighed as we neared the main entrance. I was in for a lot of self-beating tonight. There was no chance my mind would let me live through this one unscathed.

The bitter disappointment pulled in my chest as Captain and I entered the building. This might be our last evening, and it had to end like this. I bit the inside of my cheek as I followed the Captain to the stairs leading to the sleeping quarters. The storm riled outside now, wind and rain crashing into windows with furious force. The castle's silence felt eerie between the occasional thuds and creaks from the old windowsills and the deafening thunder piercing the dead of night like the steps of a 50-meter titan. It was so unusual to see the HQ so empty. But most of the scouts were still at the feast in the town; even though meat was long gone, the tavern provided enough beer to soothe soldier's thirst for the night, even before the impending battle.

When we reached the floor where Captain's rooms were, I had to swallow all the regrets and disappointment as I faced him, ready to force a proper 'goodnight' past my lips. Captain looked at the dimness of the corridor for a moment, looking deep in thought, conflicted even. With a sigh, he faced me, his professional, bored mask locked in place.

"We should talk," He said, and I suddenly wished for a 'goodnight' instead of this. Panic rose as my thoughts went darker with each passing moment.

He regretted the kiss, didn't he? Of course, he did. It was stupid of me to believe otherwise. I was broken goods. Who would want to be stuck with me instead of an ordinary girl? Maybe I should tell him it was nothing and just retire for the night. He doesn't have to know how much his refusal hurt.

Gathering my strength, I nodded to him and followed the Captain back to his rooms. My momentary resolve wavered as the door of his antechamber closed behind me with a soft click. Standing in his private space felt way more personal than I would've liked if he wanted to tell me off. Sucking in a deep shaking breath, I forced my mind to silence, channeling that familiar numbness to preserve my sanity. Captain leaned on his desk and locked his arms on his chest, staring out the window to his left into the blazing storm. I shifted from foot to foot, nervous energy rushing in my blood. It took a long few moments for the Captain to speak.

"What happened… It will affect our mission tomorrow," he said, locking his gaze on me. His eyes roamed my face, searching for some reaction that I wouldn't allow myself to show. "I must… We both must put humanity before all else. You understand that?" His voice deepened as he searched my eyes for confirmation of my acceptance.

"I understand," my words came out dry and emotionless. Captain frowned, looking at me as if trying to solve a puzzle.

"I don't want to hurt you," he said finally, carefully.

"You are not." I lied.

"What are you…" He started to ask but then stopped and sighed, looking tired. "That's not what I meant." My own words from earlier repeated back to me. I bit my lip, confused now rather than angry. "Survival of everyone within the walls depends on how we perform on tomorrow's mission. We can't fail."

Studying him closely, it had finally hit me. He was right. Hundreds of lives depended on us. We didn't have a space for a mistake. And this could very well affect our judgment and our actions. We couldn't have that happen. We couldn't let down so many innocent people just because we had feelings for each other. Whatever the fuck those feelings were. Suddenly depleted, I avoided his gaze, facing the window as he did just mere minutes ago. Rain flushed angrily at the glass, and the thunder rocked the skies, making the glass wobble on the sill. The whole world felt like too much. Suddenly, I understood why the Captain looked so tired. I felt just the same.

"You are not hurting me," I said, looking back at him again. "I understand. There are no hard feelings."

He raised an eyebrow at me. "It's not just the mission. Knowing your past… I don't want to scar you further." He clearly tried to pick the right words to touch the subject, but it didn't work. Somehow, they all felt wrong and sounded hollow.

"You can't hurt me if I choose this," I finally replied, shoving down all of my doubts. "I choose you."

He looked thoughtful for a moment before closing his eyes and cursing under his breath. "You are unbearable sometimes. I'm trying to do the right thing here."

"And who the fuck asked you to do that?" the words escaped my mouth before I thought them through. Captain's eyes snapped open, and his gaze hardened, reminding me of the moment we met when he resented me. He lowered his head, looking at me from behind his long bangs. Shadows danced on his face, occasionally chased away by the spark of the lightning. I shivered from how he looked me over, feeling smaller and weaker by the second. "I'm sorry, Captain. If you want me to leave…" I rushed out, but the Captain's voice cut me short.

"Stop that!" I froze at his command, shivers running down my spine again. His eyes softened, seeing fear flash across my face. "Stop using my title when you address me. I hate that."

I stared at him. I got so used to calling him by his title. In fact, I didn't even remember if I'd ever addressed him by his name. "Levi," I said softly, tasting each available. His name rolled off my tongue. Delicious.

He went so still that I couldn't tell if he breathed. "You know what? Forget that. Captain was better." He said after a long moment.

The corners of my lips tugged up as something devilish peaked its head inside of me. "I was just following your orders, Captain," I purred. Captain looked as surprised as I felt at the tone with which I'd said that. A pained expression ghosted over his features, and he swore loudly.

The next moment, he was on his feet, eating the space between us in long, fast strides. His hands grabbed my face and tilted it up as his lips brushed against mine for the second time today.

He was slow and tender this time, holding me in place but not forcing me there. The kiss was more of a peck than a deep, passionate making out we'd shared back in the alley. Our lips touched once, then twice, barely enough to sustain my rapidly growing hunger. Impatient, I wrapped my hands around his neck, pulling him closer and arching my back against his body. Levi made a sound low in his throat, and his hands trailed down my back, pressing me to him even tighter. His lips parted, and I followed a curve of his lover's lip with the tip of my tongue, shivering from his taste. Captain's grip on me tightened as his hands moved lower, gripping my hips in a bruising grasp. I gasped against his mouth, and Levi pulled back instantly, his hands disappearing from my body.

"Did I hurt you?" he asked, short of breath. I'd never seen him gasping for air. Not on the missions, not during the devilish training he didn't only come up with every time but also participated in. But now, his breathing was heavy, and his chest moved on deep, fast inhales as his eyes searched my face for answers. I shook my head, unable to speak. He scowled at me, and I couldn't resist a smile at his expression. Stepping closer, I tilted my head to look him in the eyes.

"You can never hurt me," I whispered, watching Levi's eyes gleam with something predatory when my words landed.

He cupped my face, looking dead-serious as he spoke. "If you need me to stop," he stopped long enough to leave a short trail of blazing hot kisses on my cheek, lowering to my neck with each one. I strained my neck, my skin tickling in anticipation. "I need you to tell me immediately." His lips landed on my neck in the softest of kisses, and the next moment, his teeth scraped the tender skin there. A moan escaped my lips before I could catch it. Levi pulled back again, looking at me intently. "Answer me!"

"Yes," I didn't have to think twice about it. There was no question, no uncertainty. I needed this. I needed him. I had to erase painful memories of the past with pleasant new ones. I couldn't let the memory of my captor keep controlling my life and actions. Not when I could very well follow him to the other side during one of the subsequent missions.

My answer was all it took for Levi's self-control to snap. His lips crashed into mine again, and his hands curled around me, studying the curve of my waist and the newly developed fullness of my hips. He hoisted me up as if I weighed nothing and headed to one of the doors, which I assumed was his bedroom. Unable to comprehend what was happening, I instead focused on feeling. I let go of every worry, every shameful and hurtful thought that usually filled my mind, and enjoyed the moment. The way his hands gripped my thighs; how pleasantly rough his lips felt when they moved against mine; Levi's scent; his warmth… And his evident hardness pressing to my core.

I moaned again, wrapping my legs around him and pressing closer. Captain cursed, and in the next moment, he deposited me on the side of the bed, untangling my legs so easily as if I didn't clench him with all my strength. My heart bit in my ears as I looked up at him, standing in front of me. Tension coiled inside, but not the worrying kind. I anticipated his next move and enjoyed the exciting uncertainty. Holding my gaze, Levi lowered himself to his knees before me and grasped my leg. I opened my mouth to ask what he was doing when he pulled on the knot on the laces, loosening it.

"No shoes in bed," he answered my silent question, and I had to stifle a giggle. Only this man would think of the dirt and cleaning in a moment like this. There couldn't be a more distant thought than cleaning on my mind right now.

He pulled my boots off, then removed his. Straightening to his full height, he looked at me as if asking permission to continue. But my face must have answered all of his questions because, in the next moment, he was kissing me again. I pulled him closer, grabbing a fistful of his shirt and tugging at it. We landed on the bed, he on top of me. Without breaking the kiss, he untied his cravat. For a second there, I wondered if he would stand up and search for the hanger to place it on, but the man was full of surprises. He threw it carelessly on the bed beside us, and his mouth bit into my back as I stared at the disregarded tie. If I needed any confirmation that Levi wanted this as much as I did, there it was, lying in wrinkles beside me. I could not imagine a better declaration of feelings from my Captain.

Cupping his face, I pulled his head up. His steel-grey eyes bore into mine, and in the bright spark of the lightning, I saw speckles of blue in his stormy gaze. "I love you," I whispered, needing to get these words out in the open. I didn't wait for his reply or the more probable lack thereof. I didn't need it. I only wanted to share how I felt about him and what he meant to me, what this meant to me.

I kissed him, wrapping my hands around his neck and pulling him closer so he could never escape. The kisses became hungrier, touches more impatient. And I had no other thought besides him holding, devouring, and cherishing me. Needing to feel more of him on me, I pulled at his shirt, fighting with buttons as I undid them one by one. Too slow. Levi had a similar idea because he broke the kiss and sat up. He pulled his shirt over his head, and I bit my lower lip, staring at his muscled torso. His build was sinfully arousing. Captain wasn't tall or broad-shouldered, yet every inch of him was a mass of rock-solid muscles. My gaze traveled his chest, following each movement of his rapid breathing, then lowered to his perfectly shaped abs and the V-lines hiding behind his pants. My mouth dried as I took him in. And he wasn't even fully naked yet.

Unable to stop myself, I reached out, running my fingertips along his sculpted torso in a featherlike touch. Levi shivered under my caress, and in the next moment, he was on me, kissing my lips and my neck, his lips descending lower and lower with each kiss. I arched into him as his hands moved up my waist, and his thumbs brushed the side of my breasts. I shuddered under his slight touch, and the Captain snickered, repeating the move of his hands.

My fingers coiled around the waistband of his pants, searching for the belt buckle. That did it. Levi snapped; he pulled my shirt over my head, ripping off multiple buttons in the process, and hastily unclasped my bra. When I was exposed to him, my breathing hitched, and my cheeks warmed. He studied me slowly, adding more and more food to the shameful side of me. His gaze traversed my body, from the exposed scars on my forearms to my small breasts, from my lips, swollen from his hungry kisses, to the waistband of my pants. He grabbed my hand then. Turning it over, palm up, he kissed it. He moved his lips along the shredded line of my oldest scar, starting at the base of my palm and dissolving mid-way to the elbow. He kept kissing his way along my arm as if erasing each scar I wore. Reaching my shoulder, he ascended, kissing me on the lips as his hands studied my body.

I ran my fingers through his hair, tugging at it slightly. That won me a low groan, and Levi grasped both my wrists, pinning them to the mattress beside my head. I breathed heavily as I stared into his bright eyes, and his gaze—serious and needing at the same time—sent an electric bolt down my spine. My body started to throb at the cursing desire in my veins. Levi hovered over me, searching for an answer to a question that needn't be voiced. His grasp on my wrists tightened, and a tinge of panic spiraled inside me. He let go instantly and moved to stand when I caught his face with my now-freed hands. "Please," I whispered, turning his head to face me. "I need this. I need you."

Levi closed his eyes, and I waited for his decision, terrified. But when he looked at me again, I knew he wouldn't turn back. Neither would I.

I pulled him in for a kiss, and he let me. His hand ran over my belly, tickling, and moved it up until his palm covered my breast. I shuddered when his calloused fingers brushed over a nipple. I ran my hands over his shoulders and chest, studying every battle scar, every hard build muscle. Lowering my hands, I reached for his belt, struggling against the buckle with my shaking fingers. He broke the kiss, and his hand covered my shaking hands. With an intense gaze, he pushed himself back until he was kneeling in between my legs. Watching my every reaction, every hitch in breathing, he unclasped his belt.

As he removed his pants, I fought my rising fear. Sex was never something I'd done willingly, let alone enjoyed. Yet this time, it was completely different. But no matter that I trusted him with my life, panic rose when my eyes followed those V-lines of his abs lower. Attempting to hide my reaction, I jerked my gaze away and pulled Captain back in for a kiss. The fear started to fade when his lips were on me again, and I melted under his touch. So when his hands moved to undo my pants, I arched myself off the bed to help him, feeling nothing but the torturing need to feel him.

When there was nothing in between us but skin, a sudden sense of righteousness hit me. I allowed my hands to roam his body freely, kissing his lips, neck, and collarbone. With me on my back and him in between my legs, I could feel his hardness press into me. Channeling some unknown strength, I reached out, finding the tip of his cock with my fingers. Levi shuddered, and his whole body jerked forward into my touch. Suddenly feeling empowered, I touched him again, this time curling my fingers around his cock and moving my hand down his length. Levi hid his face in the crook of my neck and shoulder, and my tousled hair muffled his groan. Something inside me coiled at that sound, and I moved my hand again, hoping to elicit it from him once more.

"You are killing me," he whispered against my skin, tickling it with his hot breath. I smiled, repeating the movement.

Propping himself on one arm, his free hand found its way down my body and between my legs. His fingers brushed my clit tenderly, and I jerked from the intensity of the feeling. The onslaught of memories was just around the corner, and I made sure not to close my eyes and stay in the moment as Levi positioned himself at my entrance. He watched me closely as he finally pushed in.

He went in slowly, allowing me to adjust to his size. It hurt nonetheless. It's been years since I had sex, voluntarily or not. I squeezed my eyes shut, breathing through the slight stinging.

"Open your eyes."

Levi's horse voice left no place to disobey. I held his gaze as he pushed himself to the hilt, breathing hard. As my body slowly adjusted, my insides started to burn with a different kind of pain. Squirming under him, I moved my hips, gasping as he shifted inside me. Levi closed his eyes for a moment, and the muscles in his arms strained as he held himself above me. I curled my hands around his torso, inviting him to start moving.

He didn't wait for more confirmations.

His hips moved back, and he pushed into me, drawing another gasp from me, when he hit something so pleasant inside. Dropping to his elbows instead of outstretched arms, he kissed me while his hips continued to move, starting a fire in me anew. I hugged him closer, running my hands on his muscled back. He was slow in his movements, careful. I could feel the strain in his body, some mental restraints holding him back.

"You don't have to restrain yourself," I murmured, running my fingers through his hair, brushing long strands away from his face as he met my gaze. His frown turned dark at my words. He grabbed my wrist and pinned it to the bed beside me again, staring intently into my eyes.

"I will hurt you if I don't," he practically growled back.

My throat tightened, and I could barely recognize my voice when I spoke. "I promised to tell you to stop if that happens."

His eyes roamed my face, searching for any sign of a lie or, perhaps, pain. When he found none, he sighed. The next moment, he sat up and jerked me by my arm, forcing me to flip to my stomach. Air vacated my lungs from the sudden movement. Levi jerked my hips up until my ass was in the air. His firm hand pushed me down when I moved to prop myself on my elbows. He lowered himself above me and whispered in my ear. "Don't move."

Fear twisted in my stomach, but instead of the biting chill of it, I felt only the delicious excitement. It balanced on the line between good and evil, between genuine terror and bubbling anticipation. I couldn't decipher exactly what I felt, and Levi didn't give me time to attempt that. He positioned himself behind me and thrust it in one smooth motion. A loud moan escaped me as he fucked me. Fast. Hard.

Every time a new wave of panic came, he would slow down and whisper in my ear, reminding me who was behind me. His hoarse voice sent shivers over my skin. His heavy breathing and occasional groans and grunts made my heart flutter. The building pressure inside me overwhelmed me. I moaned and writhed underneath him, my fear soon overshadowed by the fire he spread inside me.

He grabbed both my hands and pulled me up, forcing me to arch my back. Holding me in that position with a firm grip on my throat, he whispered into my ear. "Come."

My world shuttered on the command from my Captain. Stars sparkled from behind my closed eyelids, and I shivered while a wave of pleasure traveled through my body. My inner muscles spasmed, and Levi cursed under his breath, thrusting inside me a few more times. He groaned, his hips jerking as he came, and his hot essence filled me.

As we both crashed tiredly onto his bed, our joined heavy breaths filling the air, I couldn't remember any other time in my life when I'd felt this content.

And as the storm continued to blaze outside, lightning cutting the sky in half and thunder rocking and shaking the world, I couldn't have felt more at peace than at that moment.

The day has finally come.

As the gates creaked and groaned into motion and the chains clicked and rattled, I fought the nervous laughter creeping up my throat. My nerves felt like a taut string, dangling slightly in the soft morning wind. The lack of sleep didn't help me, but I couldn't be upset about that. In fact, every moment that I didn't freak out about the upcoming deadly mission, my mind slipped into the memories of yesterday. My skin still tingled from Levi's kisses. I could still feel his calloused palm on my neck, his heavy breathing in my ear. I could vividly recall the way he looked at me, and his lips curled into a small, pleased grin as my body shook from his touches.

I shook my head, feeling my cheeks heat. I should be focusing on the mission, not daydreaming about last night. Biting my lip, I took a deep breath, shivering from the biting touch of the cold air in my throat. The gate went silent, and we were ordered into a gallop. I hurried my horse, grimacing from the throne between my thighs as the rugged leather of a saddle rubbed on my sore muscles. Ignoring the pain, I focused on the road ahead, breathing in the clean air of the fields that spread between us and the Wall Maria.

It was going to be a long ride—at least two days. The plan was to take one long break at the end of today to sleep before the next leg to Shiganshina. I could already feel the bruises the saddle would leave on my ass and thighs.

Yesterday's storm left the ground peppered with puddles and the soil wet and runny. This drastically slowed the speed with which we moved across the terrain. I probably should've felt upset about it, but I, on the contrary, felt relieved that we had some extra time before the inevitable battle to the death. The last moments always held more value, stupidly enough.

The ride was unexpectedly quiet—only a few red flares made us adjust the course of the formation as we continued into the wilderness. The sun shone brightly, and I enjoyed its decreasing autumn warmth. It was peaceful somehow. If I'd closed my eyes for a second, I could pretend this was one of the usual drawls that Captain'd made us do. I could also pretend that all the deaths around me didn't exist, that Petra rode just beside me and laughed as Eld bit his tongue yet again. But even then, their ghosts would stand behind me, watching my every move. Pretending would not erase the scent of blood or the heartbreak of loss. It would only prolong the suffering.

As the sun slowly passed through the skies, my ass gradually went numb. My thighs ached feverishly from holding myself in the saddle, and my fingers cramped from squeezing the reins. When the white flare pierced the sky, ordering us to a much-needed stop, I practically sobbed with relief. Captain directed his horse to the old castle ruins, and we followed, all too tired to speak beyond answering Captain's surveillance questions. The rest of the formation rounded up behind us, circling the castle. Soldiers picked for duty dispersed around the building, taking positions high on the walls and the ruins of the watchtower, surveying the grounds for any dangers.

Captain stopped his horse and jumped to the ground. He didn't have to give us orders to build a camp—the motions were practically drilled into our heads. As Sasha, Conny, and Armin set out to build our sleeping tents, Jean and Mikasa collected firewood from the old scout's stash, set in this castle years before. That left Eren and me to go and collect water and our food rations from the wagons. Captain nodded to us and, avoiding my gaze, went to talk to the Commander. I did my best not to follow him with my eyes. We'd discussed this. We couldn't let others know there was anything between us. This could drastically affect other's emotions during the mission and their (and ours) judgment. And I couldn't and wouldn't put others at risk because of my actions. Not again.

Eren followed me as I led the way through the rapidly building campsite. Glancing back at him, I noticed a slight tremor in his hands. He stared blankly at the road before him, staying uncharacteristically quiet.

"I don't know how about you, but my ass is about to fall off," I stated, watching him for any reaction. Looking startled, he glanced up at me. "Because of the long ride." I elaborated on his confused expression. Eren nodded absent-mindedly and looked away again, preferring to stay silent. I looked at his shaking hands again, and, noticing my attention, he clenched them into fists. Frowning, I clasped his shoulder, stopping him. He stared at me in surprise. Ignoring that, I shoved the sleeve of my jacket and shirt up, exposing the skin of my forearm. The pale line looked alien on my now-tanned skin. I trailed one of them with my gloved finger. "I haven't told anyone about how I got these." I started, catching Eren's eye. "Well, Captain knows, and Hange. But standing in between those two and a mystery is a suicide mission," I chuckled. Eren stayed silent, and his gaze once again dropped to my forearm.

"Did you do it? Why?" He asked, his voice getting angrier with each word.

"Because I was afraid. When everything hurt so much that I couldn't process it, I would cut myself. And then I would feel as if I was in control of everything. In control of my life. It was a sick and frankly stupid way of fighting with my broken self, but at the moment, it felt as though there was nothing else left for me to do," I let the sleeve drop down and cover my exposed skin. "Fear is what keeps us alive and forces us to fight."

"I'm not afraid," he argued weakly, and I nodded.

"But you should be."

He stared at me for a long moment, processing my words, but before he could reply, Captain strode to us.

"Taking a chatting break?" He asked calmly, and Eren instantly perked up, yelling 'no, sir' back and hurrying away to find our night's rations. I made a move to follow him, but the Captain stopped me with his hand.

"Are you…" He sighed and shook his head. "Do you feel okay?"

My cheeks warmed at the implication in his words. "Yes, Capt… Levi." I bit my lip, and his eyes dropped to my mouth.

"Good," he replied hoarsely, tearing his gaze away and focusing on something behind me. "Here we go," he sighed tiredly and crossed his hands on his chest. I glanced back, noticing wickedly smiling Hange, who made her way through the castle ground toward us.

"What are you chatting about here, hm?" she asked sweetly, putting her forearm on my shoulder and leaning on me. I grimaced and sent a worried look at Levi. He rolled his eyes at Hange.

"Titan's shitting patterns. Care to join in?"

Hange laughed. "Yeah, yeah, shorty. As you say."

"I don't have time for this," Captain shook his head. With one last meaningful look at me, he turned and walked away. I followed his retreating form with a mix of sorrow and annoyance. After all, he left me to deal with Hange alone.

"Ouch," Hange breathed and turned to me, her eyes shining brightly from behind her goggles. I swallowed hard, searching for a way out of the discussion to come. "I think I just got burned on that look he gave you. I think you owe me a storytime."

I could swear my cheeks burned hotter than the scarlet-red sunset coloring the skies.

This was the farthest I'd ever been from the Capital. Yet, the scenery was so similar to that closer to the Wall Rose that if I didn't know I was miles away from the place I now called home, I couldn't have told. The sun shone brightly, and the slow, lazy wind raffled the tall grass of the field we rode through. Wethered-down houses scattered around the hole in the Wall where the gates used to be. It was tranquil, just the rustling of grass and leaves and the quiet chirping of the nearby river. Way too quiet for the mission we'd embarked on.

A pebbled road grew with grass and small bushes, and the garden fences of the houses lay cracked and broken, decaying as the whole city of Shiganshina. Levi's command to scale the Wall brought me out of my stupor. He jumped out of his saddle and balanced on the horse's back for a moment before sending his hooks into the Wall. Swallowing my rising terror, I followed his command, climbing to the top in less than a minute. Once my gear churned and clicked, as the hooks returned in place, I checked that my hood was still in place, as we were supposed to all cover our faces. It would be a disaster if the enemy spotted Eren in our bunch. He was the only hope to close up the holes in the Wall. If he was attacked, the whole plan might go to shit.

That is, if there were enemies here, to begin with, which the deafening silence spoke against.

Eren landed near me and fixed the hood.

"Hey," I smiled at him. "It will be a breeze. Let's finish this fast and go home as heroes, okay?"

Eren returned my smile, even though his looked just as weak as mine felt. But I didn't get to say anything else as the Captain ran past us, barking out commands. "Don't stop. You get to that outer gate!"

"Right," Eren yelled back, and with a last shared look, we both sprinted after the Captain.

The Walls weren't just tall. They were fucking long. It took us at least ten minutes of full-on sprint to circle the city and get closer to the outer gates. Levi stopped near Hange and nodded to Eren, who shot past them, engaging his ODM. I watched him fly toward the hole the Colossal Titan'd made all those years ago.

"I know we're overdue for some luck, but how have we not seen any Titans yet?" Hange mused, looking around with a deep frown.

"We still have to continue," Captain replied, his voice pointedly unnerved. I wish I had as much resolve as his voice.

"Right, we have no cause to call it off." She reached into her holster and pulled out a flare gun. It clicked as she picked the green color and pointed it to the skies. Bright green smoke pierced the sky like an arrow, and the following bright flare from the city below was a response to the signal. Eren transformed and rushed to the hole in the outer Wall. Grabbing the edges, he went still until bright blue sparks flared from him in every direction, crystallizing into an unbreakable mass and consuming Eren's Titan alongside the hole in the Wall. Eren jumped out of the hardened carcass and engaged ODM, flying back to meet us.

Levi rushed to the edge of the Wall and called out to the soldiers, inspecting Eren's work. Green flares flew from each side of the Wall, indicating a perfectly executed job. A sigh of relief escaped me, and I met Eren's eyes. He kneeled on the stones just a few feet away, breathing heavily but otherwise looking unscathed. I smiled at him as if saying, "See? Told ya."

"We pulled it off. Huh," Hange said slowly, carefully. "Eren, are you okay?"

"Not even tired. All that training's paid off." Eren replied, straightening.

"We shouldn't waste time then. Everyone, head for the inner gate." She didn't wait for our following, yes, ma'am, as she jumped off the Wall. "And keep your faces hidden," trailed off after her.

We did as commanded, sprinting back along the Wall to the inner gates. Just as we neared the right point, red smoke penetrated the skies. I scattered to a stop, the heels of my boots scraping on the concrete as I dug them in to slow down.

"Everyone scatter and stand on top of the wall," Hange yelled, flying past us. I looked after her as she landed near Commander Erwin, and they quickly discussed something. I didn't like the look of it. Fear instantly tied my stomach into a tight knot. I searched for Levi with my eyes and found him a dozen feet away, frowning at the Commander. Soldiers dispersed through the length of the Wall. Many jumped down, studying each foot of the Wall from the top to the very ground, knocking at the stones with their ODM blades.

Did they expect to find something inside the Wall? Or was it someone? Wasn't the Wall's material impossible to cut through? Yet, the Armored and Colossal Titans had broken through… The realization took my breath away. I watched with horror as soldiers knocked on the Wall, descended some, and knocked again. This couldn't be…

"Is this safe? I feel like a sitting duck," Conny asked no one in particular. I didn't even notice him joining our group.

"I don't know," Jean replied, standing near me and watching the rest study the Wall. "But this doesn't seem like much of a surprise attack."

"Did Armin figure something out?" Eren asked. I looked past him at the Captain. He met my gaze, my own worry reflected in his eyes. He'd understood it, too. The enemy was here. They just hadn't come out yet.

A scuffle below made me jerk my gaze away. Blood splattered, scattering along the Wall and dripping down to the ground. A collective gasp sounded as the soldier's body fell limp, rocking on his ODM cords like a broken dummy. Another form emerged from the inside of the Wall. It took me a moment too long to realize what was happening. When my mind caught up, Levi had already plunged off the Wall, his swords unsheathed. He reached the blond guy in less than three seconds, and his blades found their target. Splashes of blood accentuated their fall. Terror burst in my chest upon hearing Levi's growl. Before I knew it, I had my blades unsheathed, and I'd already reached the edge of the Wall, ready to plunge down. Someone's firm grip jerked me back. I snapped my head back and met Mikasa's calm gaze. She shook her head, pulling me back from the edge. I looked down, desperately searching for any sign that Levi wasn't hurt, just as he pushed Reiner off and stopped his fall with a click of his ODM. Relief so intense that my knees wobbled washed over me as I saw him moving back up, his movements sharp and collected. Unhurt.

The relief was short-lived, however, because bright light erupted from the ground in the next moment, and the rush of steam shot up. Taking a step back, I covered my face from the heat.

"Shit!" Levi growled.

"Captain?" I screamed back, trying to free myself from Mikasa's hold. Her strength was reminiscent of that of the Captains—impossible to fight against.

"What're these guys made of? A blade through the neck, and the bastard still won't die." Levi yelled, landing on top of the Wall near me.

A scream protruded from below, turning deeper and madder, until the Titan's roar shook the Wall as the Armored Titan took Reiner's place, laying in the bed of boulders, and crashed nearby buildings.

"Keep your eyes open," Commander ordered, his voice ringing through the ranks and stifling the rising fear. "We still need to find his allies!"

His words drowned in the explosion of light coming from behind his back. Steam rose, curling and twisting in the air, as a tall figure emerged from the spreading smoke.

The Beast Titan.

He was easily distinguishable even from this distance, which I could estimate at about ten minutes of horseback sprint. Fur covered his body from head to toe. His arms seemed unproportionately long as he stretched them, moving his shoulders in a circle as if his body went stiff from the lack of movement. His face was flat, and the weak sneer he wore made shivers dance all over my skin.

In the next instant, another blast of light fired to the left of the Beast Titan. And then another. And another. Like fireworks, bright yellow and white exploded to the monster's sides, forming a semicircle around the decaying ruins of Shiganshina's outskirts. Titans soon appeared in place of the steam cloud, staying in strong lines like soldiers holding a front. Cornering us in between Wall Maria and their hungry, ruthless mouths.

We are fucked.

That thought rang calmly in my head as I gaped at the line of enemies, as one would stare at a giant spider crawling across a road. I knew I had to be afraid. And deep down, I must've been. But my mind went blank with the last cognitive thought. We would die here. I knew it. And somehow, illogically, that realization felt strangely liberating. As I contemplated that, Beast Titan kneeled to pick up a boulder. He threw it in the air and caught it again, playing with it as a person would with a ball. The Titan straightened and twisted, moving his arm and holding a boulder to the back. In one quick movement, he turned, raising his leg as he put all his might into the throw. The boulder flew in our direction.

My throat clogged as I watched it flying in our direction. Rooted to a spot, I barely heard Commander's yell. "Incoming baulder! Get down!"

The boulder reached its peak, closing the view of the sun for a moment, and I squinted as it descended. Someone grabbed my wrist, the hold painfully firm. But I couldn't make myself look who it was. Unable to look away from the falling stone, I was surprised when it didn't reach us, instead crashing into the Wall somewhere beneath where we stood. My vision suddenly blurred, and I gasped, realizing I'd held my breath from the moment the Beast Titan picked the boulder up.

When the air finally reached my brain, the world went crystal clear. I didn't have to check to know where the boulder had landed. I had a perfectly fine guess. My knees wobbled, and I dropped to the stone floor, my wrist slipping from the firm grip holding it prisoner.

The Beast Titan had blocked our exit. We were surrounded.

The Wall shook underneath me, and I heard the Captain speak.

"Commander. He's about to climb." Right. The Armored Titan. Because having just one of those bastards was clearly too easy for us.

"Soldiers!" Erwin yelled, drawing everyone's attention. I forced my gaze to him, still sitting on the floor, not trusting my shaking limbs to hold me, "You're not yet to engage the Armored Titan! Maintain a safe distance." Lowering his voice, he continued. "They have one more intelligent Titan. It's that quadruped type."

I blinked at him, not sure if I understood him correctly. Turning my head to the line of Titans, I squinted, trying to spot the one Commander was talking about. Some distance away from the Beast Titan, I finally found it. A smaller four-legged titan crouched as if ready to sprint any moment. Something bulky was strapped to its back. Supplies, I assumed. Titan's small form and the ability to move on four legs made it a perfect tracker. I wouldn't be surprised to find out that we were tracked from the moment we'd left the safety of Wall Rose.

Beast Titan roared, and I jolted back, jumping to my feet, my body suddenly ready to fight. The Titan crouched and smashed its hand into the ground. A crack in the ground sprang, sending stones and pieces of solid earth flying in every direction. As if obeying a silent command, smaller titans sprinted from the forest behind him, heading to the Wall. And the rest of our soldiers. And horses.

Fuck.

"Sir, what now?" Armin asked, his voice quivering. The Wall kept shaking under the weight of the Armored Titan, climbing closer to the top with each second. "The Armored Titan is almost up. Bertholdt hasn't shown up yet, but he must be nearby!"

"Yes, I'm well aware," Commander replied, sucking in a deep breath.

"You're finally ready to say something, Erwin? Been waiting so long, I could've made breakfast." Levi said, his bored voice showing only a kindle of the rage blazing within him.

Commander swirled, facing his troops. "Dirk Squad and Marlene Squad, too. Join Klaus Squad and protect the horses at the gate!" He commanded and pointed his sword at the rest of the soldiers. "Levi squad and Hange squad! I need you to take down the Armored Titan. Employ the thunder spears at your own discretion." He turned his back to us and faced the enemy. "Do whatever it takes to achieve your objective! This is our moment. Our chance to strike. The fate of humankind depends on this battle! Lay down your hearts and lives one final time for humanity!"

My gaze jumped to Levi, standing in between me and the Commander. His eyes met mine, reflecting to me my own fear, sadness, and understanding. I could sense the weight of our sacrifice pulling down on his shoulders. The exact weight curled around my throat in invisible metal chains, strangling me. My eyes burned as I stared at the Captain. My Captain. Levi. I didn't have to ask to know what he was thinking at that exact moment because I was thinking the same thing.

Please, don't die. Do anything in your power, but do not die!

"Hey, you three, I need a word," Erwin said, and Levi broke our eye contact, leaving an empty, cold hole in the middle of my chest. Collecting all the resolve I could muster, I faced the Commander, realizing he was talking to Levi, Armin, and me. "Hange can lead both your squads. I'm going to need you right here, Levi."

"So I'll protect the horses instead of Eren?" Levi asked bitterly.

"That's right." Erwin pointed to the beast titan with the tip of his sword. "And when a chance arises, you'll strike him down. You're the only soldier I can trust to dispatch the Beast Titan."

Levi suddenly looked tired when he nodded. "Understood, sir. I wasn't fast enough to finish the Armored one earlier, but I'll atone for that by taking the Beast Titan's head."

Throwing one quick, worried glance at me, he marched to the edge of the Wall, ready to jump. We would be on different sides of the Wall. I wouldn't even know if he got hurt or not. These might be our final moments. My chest squeezed at the realization, and I was ready to lunge after him to say something, anything…

"Verity, you've been on Levi's team the longest. You worked well together before," Commander's voice froze me in place. I frowned, my heart beating fast and furiously against my ribs. When did we ever work 'together'? "I need you to cover Levi's back. Assist him in any way required so that he can achieve his task of putting down the Beast Titan."

Assist Levi? Do whatever it takes.

I blinked, the meaning of his words slowly sinking in.

"I don't need her with me. She'll only slow me down." Levi argued, his voice vibrating with unreleased anger. But I ignored it. I ignored him.

"You want me to play bait if needed," I said. Levi glared at me as If it was my suggestion, to begin with.

"If need be, yes. Take the attention off him so that nothing stands between him and his goal." Erwin nodded, holding my gaze in a challenge.

"Erwin, that's completely unnecessary," Levi ranted.

"Yes, sir. I'll do my best." My right hand slammed to the center of my chest in salute as I accepted the Commander's challenge. I could practically feel the hot stinging on my skin that Levi's glare left. But I ignored him. After all, protecting him was the only job I was completely okay with.