Chapter 15. December 1941
Stepping away from MCU canon with this chapter as the engagement changed Bucky's timeline slightly. Instead of Bucky being in art school with Steve (who continues to work at the diner) he continues to work on the docks, taking overtime whenever it is offered so he can build a nest egg, enough for a down payment on a brownstone. Like many men he believed in practical solutions to emotional matters.
—-
All day Ariel had been acting strange. She went out with Bucky in her uncle's van to purchase a Christmas tree for their apartment. After Bucky and Merton taught her to drive it in the fall she wanted to drive in the snow and ice, even though she was still not quite used to the driving conditions. Bucky looked at her uncle, trying to get his support for him to drive instead but he shrugged.
"Let her drive, Bucky," he said. "If she crashes the van, you can say you told me so. She does need the experience."
Trying not to grip the dashboard every time the van swayed a little in the slippery streets they finally arrived at a Christmas tree lot which was doing a booming business. Together they walked through the assortment until they found one that Ariel liked, a 6 foot spruce tree. Getting the operator's attention Ariel asked how much it cost.
"$1.25," he said.
"Last year they were 75 cents," protested Ariel.
"That was last year," he replied. "A five foot tree is still 75 cents whereas a six foot tree is a dollar and a quarter now. Them's my rates and you won't find it any cheaper at any of the other lots."
He was approached by a noisy family trying to find their tree and left Ariel standing there fuming.
"It's a nice tree," said Bucky. "I think it's worth what he's asking."
"Who asked you?" snapped Ariel then her face softened. "Sorry, I don't know what's bothering me but it's not you. It is a nice tree, isn't it? Look how full it is. I'll take it."
Bucky got the eye of one of the attendants and Ariel paid him for the tree. The man wrapped it with a cord then together he and Bucky loaded it into the back of the van. Ariel got behind the wheel and started the vehicle. Carefully she backed it out of the parking lot then headed towards the apartment.
"You going to help decorate it?" she asked. "I can make us some egg nog with rum."
Bucky smiled. "I'll help. Ma and Rebecca did ours yesterday while Dad and I worked overtime. The Navy put in an order for more destroyers and they're hiring on at the shipyard. By the scuttlebutt at the shipyards and at the docks they're pretty certain there's going to be a war with Japan. If that happens I might get my draft notice very soon."
Ariel said nothing, concentrating on the roads. She felt Bucky's hand on her shoulder, squeezing it and she knew he was trying to reassure her. It took all of her concentration not to blurt out that the attacks by the Japanese were already hitting Pearl Harbor. Finally, she turned onto the street where the store was and pulled into the spot in front. She could see Merton helping a customer inside. It was risky for him because of the blue laws prohibiting the opening of stores on Sundays but most of the shops in the neighbourhood did as several were run by Jewish people who closed on their Sabbath day, Saturdays, instead. Merton only did it in December to help Christmas sales. Steve was helping him as it was his day off from the diner.
"I'm going to ask Steve if he wants to stay for supper and help decorate the tree," she said to Bucky as she got out of the driver's side.
"Sure, I think he'd like that," said Bucky. "See if Merton can help me get this tree upstairs." He laughed for a moment. "Reminds me of when I hauled your trunk upstairs the day you arrived."
Ariel kissed him on the cheek and went into the store. The bell attached to the door alerted both Merton and Steve to her arrival. She waited while both men helped their customers. Finally Merton was free and he came out from behind the counter.
"Do you need help with the tree?" he asked.
Ariel nodded, gave him the van key, and he got his jacket on, asking her to cover for him. She waited as Steve finished with his customer and sent them off then he looked at her and grinned.
"It's been busy today," he said. "Almost as busy as the diner. Did you get a nice tree?"
"Yeah, I probably spent too much on it," she replied. "Do you want to stay for supper and help decorate it?"
"Sure, if you don't mind," he said. "I've been too busy to get my own."
Merton came back into the store with Bucky and she told him that Steve was staying for supper and to help decorate the tree. Suddenly a man came bursting through the door; he owned a business a couple of doors down.
"Turn the radio on," he said breathlessly. "The Japanese have attacked Pearl Harbor in Honolulu."
Immediately Merton turned on one of several radios he had for sale in the store. He tuned it to several stations before he found one that had the bulletin. It had just turned 2:30 in the afternoon.
"President Roosevelt has announced a Japanese air attack on the naval base at Pearl Harbor in Hawaii. There are also unconfirmed reports of attacks on the Philippines, Guam, and Wake Island as well as British held territories in Malaya, Singapore and Hong Kong. It is expected that both Houses in Washington will convene in the next 24 hours to formally declare war on Japan and its allies. Stay tuned for further information."
A soft sob broke out of Ariel's throat and Bucky immediately put his arm around her, holding her close. Other than the sounds of her crying none of them said anything as music returned to the station.
"Bucky, why don't you take Ariel upstairs?" asked Merton finally. "There's scotch in the cupboard. I think she could use a stiff drink. We'll be up shortly."
He nodded and led Ariel out of the store and up the stairs. Inside, he helped her take her boots off then her coat. Leading her to sit on the sofa in the parlour he put a throw on her, which Rosie immediately jumped on, settling herself on Ariel's lap. Going to the kitchen he found the scotch and poured them each some, then came to the couch and lifted her onto his lap, forcing Rosie to sit beside them. Holding her glass, he encouraged her to have a sip then he held her closely as she whimpered slightly.
"Ariel," he whispered.
She shook her head. "Don't talk, just hold me," she answered, pressing her forehead into his cheek.
They were still sitting there when Merton and Steve came up. Bucky smiled grimly at them. He felt helpless, knowing nothing he said would comfort her. The thing she feared openly had happened and it meant he would have to leave her behind in the foreseeable future. Why now? Why did the Germans and the Japanese have to stir things up and interrupt everyone's lives? Steve sat next to them on the couch and idly stroked Rosie's back while Merton started the oven up and took a casserole out of the icebox that Ariel made earlier in the day. He would have turned the radio on, but the attack was on all the channels now, dominating the airwaves. Even though it was history to him he still felt the sting of disbelief that the world had turned very dark. It was a very solemn dinner and Ariel excused herself after to go to bed, leaving the Christmas tree undecorated. As the two young men left the apartment Steve looked up at his friend.
"Do you think they'll send the draft notices out right away?"
Bucky nodded. "Probably by the end of the week." They walked in silence for a few minutes then he opened up to his smaller friend. "You know Ariel saw this coming, last year even. I thought she was being silly. We argued about it."
"We have to stand up to them," replied Steve. "The Germans and the Japanese. I hope the training we've done makes me strong enough to go."
"I'll go but you shouldn't get your hopes up," said Bucky. "Besides, I need you to watch Ariel for me. I trust you with her."
"You don't think I'll pass the physical, do you?" Steve had a harsh edge to his voice. "Why do you always say I can't do things? You don't think I'm man enough to fight?"
They stopped under a street light and Bucky looked up to see small snowflakes blown by the slight breeze in the glow. He didn't want to be angry at Steve but it just seemed like the guy didn't see the big picture.
"I know you are man enough," he replied finally. "I just don't get why you're all keen to go. You have this heroic idea about what war is and it's not. My Dad and I have talked, and war is brutal. You're pushed to your limits and you still have to keep going because your fellow soldiers are counting on you, even when you're cold, hungry, wet through, and every part of you is screaming for rest but you don't dare because the enemy could attack at any moment. I don't want any of it but I'll go because it's my duty, nothing more, nothing less. I'll go even though the woman I love is terrified I won't return and she'll be left alone with a broken heart."
He began to walk again and Steve watched him before running to catch up. Scratching behind his ear he thought about what Bucky said, realizing that his friend was afraid because he had a lot to lose, his parents, his sister, and Ariel if something happened to him. It was certain that Bucky would pass his physical and likely begin basic training in the New Year. Steve knew deep down that his chances of passing the physical weren't good but he was still going to try. For just once in his life he wanted to be able to say he mattered.
Draft notices were sent out starting that week and although Bucky and Steve didn't receive theirs right away there were younger men in the neighbourhood who did and they went down to the enlistment centre to report in. An announcement was also made expanding the draft to men aged 35 to 64 and Merton found himself in line to register for it. He felt quite out of place amongst the young men who were waiting to volunteer. When he gave the corporal in the recruiting centre his information the man smiled and looked up at Merton.
"Don't worry, Gramps, there's millions of younger men who'll go ahead of you first. Your country thanks you for showing up, all the same."
It was a surreal experience registering and he recorded the whole experience with a button camera, then wrote up a notation of the process. Ariel smiled at him later when he related his registration process then hugged him.
"I'm glad they'll pick the younger ones over you, Merton," she said. "I would hate to lose you. Does that mean your other resident historians may be drafted? How does that work if they're chosen for the service?"
He looked pensive for a few moments. "I don't really know," he finally admitted. "Perhaps the Guild gives us something that affects our blood pressure or heart rates so that we're declared 4F. It's not like we have lots of qualified people waiting in the wings to take over. Will was young to be a resident historian but he was an early college graduate at just 19 and proved himself with several difficult assignments before he was 32, which is when he was assigned here. Most are well into their 40s before they're assigned a resident historian status."
Ariel tilted her head listening to the older man, learning something new. "How many assignments did you complete before your first residency?"
"Let me think, my first was when I was 22, in San Francisco during the Gold Rush years, a fascinating time. I did a similar one in the Yukon in 1897, posing as a government inspector. Did you know the Canadian government required anyone coming there to have a ton of supplies to last the winter? They had to carry it all in before they were allowed to begin searching for gold. By 1899 most of those people switched their sights to a gold rush in Nome that was easier to get to. I requested a warm weather assignment and was placed in Hawaii in the late 1800s. Beautiful place, beautiful people who didn't deserve how they were treated." His face reddened and he looked embarrassed. "Sorry, I got lost in the memories. I did at least a dozen assignments as a regular historian before I took a sabbatical and did research on Montana for my first resident historian assignment. Brooklyn was my second residency."
"Has it been worth it?" she asked. "Were you able to have relationships or were you always alone?"
"I was alone for most of it but I did have relationships during my sabbatical," he replied. He looked away then looked at Ariel again, smiling. "I've been in the presence of many fine people, working hard lives for little to no recognition. In a way, I'm the only one who recorded their contribution to history, so yeah, it was worth it."
Ariel wondered if there was more he wasn't saying but she didn't press the matter. When Peri first confirmed that this assignment was hers she described Merton as one of the best resident historians the Guild ever had. By the way Peri hugged him she wondered if they were also friends, not just colleagues. Certainly he had helped Ariel navigate her way through this deep cover assignment, the first one the Guild had ever attempted, deliberately allowing an actual emotional relationship to form with a subject. She didn't want to let anyone down, knowing how much rode on her work and the monograph she would produce about James Buchanan Barnes in the pre-war years.
Mrs. Barnes telephoned to invite both Ariel and Merton to Christmas dinner at their house. Once again Ariel offered to help with the cooking. This time Bucky's mother accepted the help and invited her over so they could plan the meal together and divide up the tasks. Now that Ariel and Bucky were engaged Merton suggested they get gifts for everyone and together he and Ariel were able to acquire some unique items that would fit the bill.
On Tuesday, the 23rd of December, Ariel was working as the Library would be closing at noon on her regular work day, the 24th. It would also be closed after Christmas until the following week. As she finished her shift at 5 o'clock she noticed Bucky waiting for her in the vestibule. It puzzled her because he usually worked extra hours on the dock, often until 6 or 7 o'clock. When she approached him, all bundled up for the walk home she could see he was nervous and she suddenly felt an icy feeling in her stomach.
"Why are you here?" she stammered. "Why aren't you working?"
He took her by the hand and exited the door. "I didn't work today. I was at the induction centre, getting my physical and my psychological tests." Ariel froze and Bucky sighed, grasping both of her hands. "I'm 1A, and I'm to report for transport to boot camp in Wisconsin on Monday, January 5. They have a train leaving from Grand Central Station after lunch that day."
Withdrawing her hands from his Ariel stepped backwards several feet, almost stumbling. Bucky reached out to steady her but she shrunk away from him. Her mouth was open in disbelief and her eyes began to fill with tears.
"Ariel, you've always known this would happen," he said softly. "It's sooner than I expected but it will still be a while before I go overseas. There's at least 12 weeks of training, then they'll divide us up for further training in specific areas. It could be a year or more before I'm sent overseas, and I'll be home on leave several times. We could get married, be together."
"No, I don't want to marry you anymore," she cried out, pulling her left glove off, and trying to pull the engagement ring off her finger.
Bucky stepped forward, grasping her hand. "Don't take it off, please," he begged. "We don't have to get married if you're not ready but if you took that ring off it would break me. Please don't."
It was his eyes glistening under the light of the streetlamp that stopped her, and she surrendered herself to his arms, both of them clasped tightly together in the darkness of the early winter evening. On the walk home he kept his arm tightly around her shoulders, trying to give her as much support as he could. When they arrived at the store they could see Merton inside, finishing with one last customer.
"Should we tell him together?" asked Bucky. "You don't have to come in with me. I haven't even told my parents yet."
"Alright," replied Ariel after some deliberation. Before they went inside she took her hand out of her glove and placed it on his face. "I'm sorry for my reaction. I'll try to be more supportive but you know it's hard for me to get past my fear."
"I know." He smiled slightly and kissed her gently. "It'll be alright. I have a feeling that we'll be okay."
They entered the store and Merton looked up to acknowledge them. When he saw Ariel's face he knew something was wrong, but he focussed his attention on the customer and finally got them to commit to the sale. After he rung them up and packaged their purchase, he escorted them out the door, locking it and turning the open sign to closed. He began to pull down the blinds and smiled at Bucky when he helped. Ariel stayed by the counter.
"What's going on?" asked Merton, walking towards the counter.
"I had my physical and psychological evaluation today," said Bucky. "I go for boot camp in early January, in Wisconsin."
"I thought it was something like that," replied Merton, placing his hand on Ariel's shoulder. "Are you okay?"
"No, but there's nothing I can do about it," she answered diplomatically. "Let me help you tally your receipts. Bucky still has to tell his parents."
"What about Steve?" asked Merton. "Did he get called in for his physical?"
"Tomorrow," said Bucky. "He won't pass. I've been training him for months but he was so sickly when he was younger it's like his body just won't accept the benefits of physical work. He's gained all of a pound and can barely lift 20 pounds in weights. I know he feels like it's his duty as an American to be there but ..."
Bucky couldn't finish his sentence and Merton patted him on the back sympathetically. Kissing Ariel once more Bucky said goodnight to both of them and left to give his news to his parents. Merton waited to see if Ariel would say anything but she was busy tallying his receipts and he began counting his cash, setting aside his float for the next day. After dinner he respected Ariel's need for solitude and didn't intervene when she said she was going to bed early.
The following morning Ariel went for her three hours of work. She was surprised when she arrived to find the Head Librarian of all the New York libraries there. Just before they opened the door he pulled all the staff into the staff room and made the announcement that Mr. Grayson was retiring, effective December 31, and that Mrs. Houseman would be promoted to Library Manager. The Assistant Library Manager position would be posted across the city but he encouraged everyone in the branch to apply, as he felt most of the staff would make fine Assistant Managers. With his goodbye and good luck wishes to Mr. Grayson the doors were unlocked to a lineup of people anxious to borrow enough books to satisfy their reading habit for the next five days. The few hours passed quickly and gifts were exchanged between them prior to leaving for the Christmas break. When Ariel stepped out she was surprised to see Steve waiting for her.
"Why are you here?" she asked. "I thought today was your physical."
"It was," he said somewhat despondently. "They didn't even examine me. Just took one look and wrote 4F on my enlistment form. I didn't know what else to do or where else to go."
"Wasn't Bucky waiting for you?" she asked.
Steve shook his head. "Said he had to get one last gift. I'm glad he wasn't there. We worked so hard together and it was all for naught."
She placed her hand in the crook of his arm and walked with him, not saying anything but just being there for him as a friend. When they got to the store she asked him to come in to say hi to Merton but he didn't want to.
"Then come upstairs and help me ice some cookies," she said. "I have a couple of things I still have to do. Just keep me company."
He looked all around, trying to find a reason to say no but he finally agreed and Ariel waved at her uncle then went up the stairs followed by Steve. She turned the radio on, then put an apron on and began making icing for the cookies. After showing Steve how she wanted them done she left the task up to him while she made some brownies and gingerbread. While the brownies and gingerbread were baking she made hot chocolate for them, with a splash of rum. On the cookies that Steve had iced she sprinkled coloured sugar in patterns then put them aside to set. They both continued on with them after she took the brownies and gingerbread out to cool. By the time they finished the cookies they had also finished the hot chocolate and Ariel smiled at Steve with empathy.
"Thanks," he said. "I was feeling bad about myself. I'm still not happy about it but I feel better."
"Will you be at the Barnes house tomorrow?"
Steve nodded. "Yeah, they're my only family, although you're pretty close to being like my sister."
"We'll be there after breakfast to open presents," said Ariel. "I'm helping Mrs. Barnes get the meal ready."
Pushing himself away from the table Steve put his jacket and scarf on. Impulsively he gave Ariel a warm hug then kissed her on the cheek.
"Merry Christmas, Ariel," he said with some emotion.
"Merry Christmas, Steve," she replied, and walked him to the door, watching him step down to the door to the street.
Returning to the kitchen she made the icing for the brownies and smoothed it on. So focussed was she on the process she didn't hear the door open nor Bucky walk in. He watched her from the entrance to the kitchen, smiling at her wearing her Christmas apron, and occasionally moving her hips to the Christmas music playing on the radio. Finally he knocked on the wooden frame of the entrance and stood himself under the mistletoe that was attached to it. Ariel turned around, seeing him standing there.
"How long were you watching?" she asked as she wiped her hands on a towel and advanced towards him.
"Long enough," he said softly. "I liked watching you dance."
She wrapped her arms around his middle. "You going to kiss me?"
He nodded and leaned over gently placing his lips on hers, then enclosing her in his arms. Still kissing each other tenderly they finally broke apart slightly to look at each other with fondness. Neither one stopped holding the other until Ariel finally pulled herself away.
"Do you want a coffee or a hot chocolate with some rum?" she asked.
"Coffee and rum sounds good," he said, pulling a chair out from the table and reaching towards one of the cookies.
"Those are for tomorrow," she warned, then smiled. "Tell me if they're any good."
He bit into it and chewed with the air of a judge at the county fair food competition.
"They taste pretty perfect to me," he said.
Ariel brought his coffee over and poured a bit of the rum in, standing extra close to Bucky as she did it. Without taking his eyes off hers he ran his hand up the outside of her leg under her dress. Gently he caressed the skin above her nylon, then ventured higher, under the edge of her panty, rubbing his thumb on the soft skin there.
"Do you have a fancy dress?" he asked quietly. She nodded. "Wear it for New Year's Eve and pack an overnight bag to stay at a hotel in the city. I'm taking you to a dress up party. I already spoke to your uncle about it as it will be the last time we can be together before I leave for boot camp. I just want to be alone with you, everything above board, no lying, no sneaking around. I love you, you love me and we're engaged."
"We won't be in violation of any laws?" she asked.
"No, because I already spoke to the hotel and we're both of legal age," said Bucky. "They're being quite flexible because of the number of men that will be leaving for boot camp. Kind of their way of giving a soldier a break."
"Alright," replied Ariel. "I'll get dolled up, just for you. We'll dance and bring in the New Year, then I'm yours for the whole night."
Reaching up with his other hand while Ariel bent low towards his face their lips met in a soft, languid kiss, and Bucky caressed the soft rounded cheek of her bottom under her panty. A little whimper escaped Ariel's throat and for a moment they both wanted the other, right there on the kitchen chair. Then Bucky slowly removed his hand and moved it to Ariel's face, just before ending the kiss. They heard Merton come up the stairs and Ariel stood up without hurrying, caressing Bucky's face before stepping back to the stove just as the door opened. The only sign of their erotic moment was Bucky repositioning himself to face the table so that he could camouflage the bulge in his pants. Merton never gave any sign of noticing as Ariel brought him a coffee and splashed some rum in it, bringing a smile to her uncle's face.