A/N: It's a little choppy, but I'm steering to something. I hope you all enjoy. Let me know what you think and stay tuned for more.
Two Weeks Later
"You can't wear shorts, Bug. It's too cold outside." Sarah muffled a yawn as she pulled the coffee pot from its warmer.
Callum rocked on his feet, dressed for school as if it was a sunny, summer day and not the end of Fall and freezing outside, "But Mommy -"
"Long sleeves, pants, socks. Now." Sarah ordered, shooting her son a stern look over the rim of her mug. She had left a few options for him to choose from on his bed while he ate breakfast, none of which belonged to the ensemble he was currently wearing.
Callum frowned mutinously. It had been a morning of struggles. He hadn't wanted to get up, didn't want to finish his cereal and take his vitamins. Sarah had to stand over him to make sure he brushed his teeth. Now it was his clothes.
"Nooo." Callum whined stomping his feet, "I wanna wear this!"
"Callum," Sarah warned quietly. It was too early to be having a tantrum and she did not have the energy for it. She was ready to march him back into the bedroom when a light knock sounded at the door.
Callum lit up instantly and Sarah had to hold in a sigh as he went running to yank open the door. They both knew who was on the other side, "Daddy!"
Connor returned his son's grin just as he received an armful of the five-year-old, "Hey Bud. Did Mommy say you could open the door?"
"Yes."
"No." Sarah corrected as she arched a brow at her son, "We're lying this morning now too?"
Callum frowned and scowled into his father's chest.
Connor stood with him as he glanced curiously between his son and Sarah. It was obvious he had walked in on something – tempers were flaring. He leaned back as he tried to catch Callum's eye, but only received a swath of dark hair for his efforts. He would bet a hundred dollars that Callum had the exact same surly pout as his mother right now, "Is that true, Bud? Did you just lie to me?"
Callum squirmed and firmly pressed his face into Connor's chest this time. It was as much an admittance of guilt as anything.
The quiet distress Callum was emitting dug at him like a dagger. Unwittingly, Connor came to match his family as a frown marred his expression. "Callum, I don't like that. You shouldn't be lying. Not to me, not to Mommy, not to anyone."
His words evoked a muffled sob and he felt like an asshole, even as he was surprised by Callum's reaction. He hadn't meant to make his kid cry. Sarah on the other hand took both his panicked guilt and Callum's upset in stride, "Why don't you help him finish getting ready? He needs to change. I'll get his bag together."
Connor nodded as he rubbed his son's back, suddenly noticing the bare legs his arm was supporting. Where were his pants?
Callum sniffled, clinging tighter to his father as he wailed, "I wanna wear sh-shorts!"
"And I said no." Sarah stated calmly, "It's too cold. Crying to Daddy isn't going to get you what you want either. You have one last chance to pick what you want from the piles on the bed before I pick for you."
Connor's frown deepened at her words. It felt a little harsh - Callum was five, he doubted he could be that manipulative, "Come on, Bud, let's see what Mommy left out for you."
"NO!" Callum screamed, kicking out and catching Connor in the hip as he melted down into a full-blown tantrum, "I WANT SHORTS! I - I WANNA WEAR -!"
"Hey -" Connor grunted at the dull pain that laced up his side as he tried not to lose his grip on the screaming, struggling boy. It seemed like Callum had gone from zero to a hundred in a second flat.
A yowl erupted from Callum as Connor tried to soothe him before, "I DON'T WANT YOU!"
Sarah sighed and gestured for him to put their son on the ground. He sprawled into a complete mess and Connor felt useless, especially as he tried to hide how hurtful his son's words had been. This was his first time experiencing a Callum meltdown outside of their first meeting, but even he knew this wasn't the same thing.
Sarah paid his struggle little mind as she disappeared into the bedroom, only to return with a set of clothes. Callum's backpack was placed at the end of the pullout. His lunchbox slipped inside as she murmured over the screaming, "Coffee in the kitchen if you want some."
Connor blinked in disbelief at her nonchalance before she settled down on the floor next to their now heavily sobbing son. Somehow her silence seemed louder than Callum's cries and Connor found that he was very much afraid of breaking that silence. An air of disappointment and disapproval swarmed like storm clouds from her – even as she sat quietly back and crossed her legs at her ankles. Sarah was mad.
Slowly, Connor came to sit next to her, unable to shake the image of a poked bear from his mind, "Just let him cry it out?"
Sarah glanced at her phone, "He gets five minutes."
Connor didn't know what to do with that statement. He wasn't sure what would happen if Callum didn't calm down in five minutes and wasn't sure he wanted to know. He could honestly say this was the first time he truly found Sarah intimidating... he didn't know why, but he was also a little turned on. He was sure he needed his head examined.
Callum made it to four minutes before his sobs began to peter out into hitched breaths and sniffles. He reached for Sarah, and she instantly pulled him into her arms. He collapsed against her chest, still shaking with faint cries. She squeezed him tight for a moment before reaching past him to snag his clothes.
His shorts were dropped to the ground, and she bunched up his jeans behind him, "Step."
Callum kept a tight hold on his mother but followed her instructions with quiet whimpers.
"Step."
His other foot found the hole and the denim was pulled to his waist and snapped in place. His tank was left on and a long sleeve shirt with a bear on it was pulled over his head, "Arm."
A small hand was pulled through the sleeve opening.
"Other one." Shirt in place. She twisted him around, "Sit."
Thick socks were tugged over curled toes. Shoes were wrestled into place and a coat was summarily wrapped around the little boy in record time.
Callum was leaning heavily against his mother, much calmer, but looking utterly miserable with his ruddy cheeks and snot-shiny nose. Sarah stood him up to face her as she quietly asked, "You done?"
Callum nodded.
Her palm felt his forehead, "Did your head hurt when you woke up?"
He shook his head.
"It hurt now?"
Another nod.
"Your stomach hurt?"
Another shake.
"You're not sick. So, I don't know where this bad mood of yours came from, but it's not okay to behave badly when you're not getting your way." Sarah lectured quietly, "You can kick and scream and cry all you want, but it will not change a thing. You still had to put on pants," She tapped his leg and then his arm, "You still had to put on a coat – only now you made your head hurt and mine. You hurt Daddy and you're not going to get to watch TV tonight for lying and you're no longer going to Max's after school."
Callum's face creased with a fresh wave of tears as he burst out with a harsh, "I'm sorry!"
"Thank you for apologizing, but that's not going to get you out of your punishment." Sarah murmured, wiping gently at his cheeks, "You need to apologize to Daddy too."
Callum turned hesitantly to Connor, his blue eyes wide and uncertain as he slowly realized that his father had witnessed everything. He sniffled, his little hand tightening on Sarah as he whispered, "S-sorry, Daddy..."
Connor's heart cracked at his small voice – he didn't understand how Sarah remained so composed, he was ready to hand his kid the world to make him smile again. Instead, he opened his arm up and nearly fell over in relief when Callum barreled into him.
"Ah, kiddo..." Connor sighed, nuzzling his face into his son's hair, "Let's give your mother a few minutes of peace and clean your face up, huh?"
A small bob and a hiccup against his shoulder let him know Callum agreed. He picked his boy back up and gave Sarah a sympathetic smile. She looked like she was ready to tell the world to take a hike. She was done and it was barely seven-thirty.
Connor got him settled on the bathroom counter as he flipped on the faucet and searched for a wash rag. Callum continued to hiccup, unable to fully quell his tears as he quietly watched his father. It was only as the damp rag touched his cheek did his little boy mournfully asked, "A-are you gonna lu-lu-leave?"
Connor's brow furrowed, "Leave? Bud, what -?"
"I-I didn't mean it..." Callum cried, "I don't w-want you to go, Daddy. I'm s-sorry. I'm sorry."
"Oh, Bud." Connor didn't know how his heart kept breaking- Callum seemed intent on turning it into dust. He placed the rag down and made sure he had Callum's full attention, "I know you didn't mean it. It hurt to hear, but I know, Bud. I'm not going anywhere."
"P-promise?"
Connor held out his pinky, "Pinky promise."
Callum latched onto that finger before Connor could blink. Instinctively, Connor pressed his lips to Callum's head as he had seen Sarah do a hundred times now. It seemed to be the correct move as Callum burrowed back into his arms. Sarah was right, he was a cuddle bug, but Connor didn't mind – especially when all he wanted was to hold Callum tight for the rest of the day.
It took a few minutes longer than he expected, but he got Callum cleaned up and back out to where Sarah was waiting.
It had become a routine after Callum's birthday for him to help take their son to school. Almost two weeks. He usually showed up a little earlier to eat breakfast with him, but he had worked a late shift at the hospital. He wondered if that had thrown things off for his boy. Connor's gaze kept falling to the car booster seat unable to stop checking on Callum. He was usually chatty and happy, but he had become withdrawn after his episode and crying jag. Sarah caught his eye the fourth time he checked and arched a knowing brow at him but didn't say anything until they had gotten to Hamilton Elementary.
"Alright, Bug, behave yourself." Sarah murmured as she knelt before the gate opening, "Nana Schuler is going to pick you up. I love you."
"Love you," Callum murmured with a hug and kiss before he turned to Connor.
He could still see a bit of wariness in his boy and muffled a sigh as he gave him a hug, "Love you, Bud. Mommy's right, behave, okay?"
"Kay." Callum said, "Love you, Daddy."
It was something of a relief to hear those words – Connor could count on one hand the number of times that Callum had said it aloud now. Usually, he received a pleased smile and a shy glance whenever he said it to his son. Connor squeezed his boy tight and fought his desire to just take Callum home with him. A long-forgotten part of him grumbled about school being stupid. Missing one day wouldn't hurt, would it?
As if she knew what he was thinking, Sarah touched his shoulder and he sighed, letting their son go. Callum teetered in place for a moment before his name was called by another kid. He took off running for his friends, looking back only once to see his parents watching after him.
Sarah waved to a teacher watching the playground before she tugged on his sleeve, "Come on. I got a call from the admin office yesterday. You have to sign some paperwork so you're okay to pick him up in the afternoons now. You're going to need to provide your driver's license."
Connor followed her slowly, frowning faintly as he realized how... standoffish Sarah suddenly seemed. She had been frustrated and pissed at her apartment – understandably so, quiet and almost cold in the car, and now... it was like a wall had been erected around her.
He had no idea where her mind was at – he was still trying to process Callum's tantrum, "Hey, can we talk about this morning?"
"Hmm?" Sarah hummed, turning to him.
Connor stilled on the sidewalk, "Callum. He was like a firework. Are his tantrums usually that bad?"
Sarah muffled a snort and crossed her arms, "On the scale of tantrums that was maybe a four out of ten. Pretty mild all things considered."
Disbelief crinkled Connor's brow as he stared at her. That hadn't seemed mild at all.
She sighed, "He's been building towards one for days now, Connor. I was hoping it would happen after the holidays, but no luck. And honestly, I'm glad it was over something as innocuous as what he wanted to wear. He raged for a few minutes, let out what he needed to let out, and by the end of the day he'll be right as rain again."
"What did you mean he's been building? He's been fine. Yesterday, he was laughing and playing and just...happy." Connor pressed, not understanding what Sarah had seen that he hadn't.
There was a minute of stilted silence, and he could see Sarah choosing her words.
She sighed again, "He's a little boy who has just had to deal with a lot of change in a short period of time. It's not just that he has you – his father now, a new person to know and love. His morning routine is different, his evening routine is different. No child – no adult either- handles that much change well. It's a lot of stress. He was due for a meltdown. Not to mention that tonight is his holiday pageant and I'm sure he's nervous and excited for that too... It's just been a lot."
Connor was at a loss for words. What she said made sense, but he hadn't seen any signs – nothing that would indicate that Callum was stressed. It was a glaring reminder of how little he knew his son, "How'd you see it?"
"I'm with him more than you." Sarah said softly, "I get his attitude. You get happy Callum – with the exception of this morning. It was easier for me to see coming."
"That's not fair," Connor mumbled, even though he knew she wasn't wrong.
Sarah arched a brow, "For you or for me?"
"Both." He sighed and shook his head.
"It's growing pains, Connor." Sarah continued in that same gentle tone – sad tone, "For all of us. We have to go through all this... discomfort to get to the point where it's good."
"I thought he was starting to feel more comfortable with me."
"He is." She shrugged, unsure how to make him understand, "He let you see him at a bad moment. That is a sign he's getting comfortable with you."
Connor grumbled miserably, "So comfortable, he's afraid I'm gonna leave."
Sarah crumpled, sympathetic to that particular quandary, "I know. The walls in my apartment are paper-thin. Just...stop by tonight like you have been doing. Don't miss his performance. Actions speak so much louder to kids than words do. And while his routine has changed – you are a part of it now. Keep to the routine."
"It'd be easier to do if we'd go to HR about us having a kid." Connor pointed out for what felt like the millionth time with her, "It'd open up resources and scheduling options to us for childcare."
"Connor..." Sarah groaned, looking for all the world like she wanted to strangle him.
He had no doubt she did. They had been going in circles on all the big childcare items. Between child support which Sarah seemed allergic to discussing, to HR which she wouldn't even entertain, to telling his family which Connor wouldn't entertain beyond acknowledging it needed to happen, to Callum staying the night at Connor's which was a slow build project that he reluctantly accepted his fate on.
"How many shifts have you taken on this week?" Connor asked, and the edge to his voice made her bristle, "I looked at the calendar last night, your name is all over it. You get two days before and after Christmas off per the med school mandate, what other days are you shooting for?"
"What -"
"The entire week after Christmas? When Callum has his winter break?" Connor pressed, unrelenting as he stepped into her space, "He goes back on the eighth, that's what? Another seven days or so that you would need off -"
"Connor-"
"Going to HR would grant you that time without you trying to kill yourself working around the clock." He wouldn't be stopped on this, "I already asked for the second week of January off and it's been granted. I can watch Callum that week. Which, by the way, is another conversation we need to have. You should be coming to me when it comes to covering care for our son. You're not doing this by yourself anymore. So, please just agree to go to HR with me."
"It's six months, Connor. I graduate in six months. I'm so close after so long." Sarah shook her head, knowing he didn't understand, "I'm not going to risk losing everything that I've had to fight for just so I can get a little extra sleep."
"For our son to have a present mother. Do you think he doesn't notice how exhausted you are?" He spat, "Because he does, Sarah. Hell, he told me the other day we need to be quiet; mommy isn't feeling well. What five-year-old says that?"
"It's just for a few more days -"
"Then again at spring break? Presidents' Day? Whatever holiday the school throws in? What then?"
"And what about if we do go to HR. You know the minute we do that your father will be all over us. Or have you forgotten he's on the hospital board? Is that something you want?" Sarah threw back.
There had been a brief, very brief, discussion on how he intended to inform his family of Callum's existence and that conversation had only touched on his sister. Sarah had no idea what his plan for his father was – she had a feeling he didn't have one.
"HR can't legally disclose confidential information without our permission and if they do, then I can and will sue. And that's not something the hospital can afford." Connor answered, neatly sidestepping her question. In truth, even he wasn't sure how much pull his father had on the board, but it was probably a nauseating amount, and there was still a good chance that information would be leaked to him, "I'm willing to risk it. Especially if it means that Callum is getting both of his parents, instead of a string of adults and after-school programs put in our place. Unless of course, you've decided to take that child support check I gave you and use it to hire a nanny, but you'd actually have to deposit it first."
Sarah bristled and a look eerily similar to the one she had sported when she waited out Callum crossed her face. She was mad again. It hadn't been his intention, but lately, that seemed to be the only emotion he could evoke from her.
"I don't need your money. I've told you that before." Sarah stated, her teeth gritted, and he knew she was trying not to yell, "I've already had to deal with a tantrum from your son this morning, I don't need to deal with one from you too. I said no. Now, can we please get this paperwork taken care of, so I can get to the hospital?"
He wasn't having a tantrum. Connor breathed out through his nose. He wasn't. He was reasonably sure that her fears were unfounded. She wouldn't lose her spot at the hospital... he wouldn't let that happen.
Silently, he gestured for her to lead the way, "This conversation isn't over."
She glared at him over her shoulder as she stepped into the school lobby.
"And deposit the check." He ordered lowly, barely dodging her bag as she flung it over her other shoulder. Connor had no doubt that it had been done on purpose. He bit his tongue on a few choice words, this was not the place to be fighting with his ex.
"Good morning. Can I help you?" An overly cheerful voice chirped from the desk.
Twin plastic smiles appeared on Sarah's and Connor's faces, "Good morning."
"Have you taken your break yet?"
Ethan set aside his stethoscope as he finished with his patient, his eyes had flickered over to Sarah as she filled in the required notes to the tablet. She had done the initial examination under his supervision, but he wanted to verify a few of her findings before the patient was taken upstairs for imaging.
Sarah didn't acknowledge the question, her brow furrowed in concentration as she tapped a little harder on the screen.
"Sarah?"
"Have the tablets been glitchy for you?" Sarah asked abruptly.
She turned to him, and he was struck by the circles lining her eyes. He remembered his last year of med school; it had been brutal. He had lost fifteen pounds without ever meaning to – Sarah looked like a good wind would push her over. He stepped next to her and gently took the tablet from her hand. Two clicks and everything was submitted, and Sarah looked mortified.
He smiled reassuringly, "Take a break. You've been going hard all day. I didn't even see you get lunch."
Sarah shook her head, "I need to leave by six and I can only do that if I take my lunch break at the end of my shift. I'm fine. I promise."
"Sarah," Ethan uttered; disapproval rampant in his voice.
"I'm fine. I swear." Sarah squeaked, eyes wide and innocent as she silently pleaded for him not to send her to break.
Ethan sighed, "It's Thursday. Do you have a date or something?"
"Or something." Sarah murmured with a sheepish smile, "It's an event that I can't miss."
"Aren't you supposed to work tonight?"
Ethan's brow arched as April brought in the paperwork for their patient. It caught his notice how she never seemed to miss a step with any of the staff. Maggie had trained her well. April turned expectantly to them.
Sarah flushed and shrugged awkwardly, "Well... Yeah. But not until two-thirty. I'm taking the last half of Derek's shift, so he can head out early for his parents' Christmas Celebration this weekend."
"And then you're on duty again at nine." April pointed out, "Girl, I've seen you more in the past week than I've seen my own bed. You are gonna burn yourself out if you keep taking all these shifts."
Choi silently agreed. Sarah was a glutton for punishment with all the shift swapping she had been doing the past week. He had played the game himself, but not to this extent.
An uneasy silence fell over the small group as Sarah's face went carefully blank. A tight smile that had nothing behind it graced her lips – polite, but distant. Ethan had a few of those in his arsenal, "I'll have the week after Christmas off to rest. I'll be okay."
With nimble fingers, she slipped the tablet back from Ethan and gave them a parting smile before heading back to the nurse's station to catch the next patient Maggie was setting up. Ethan and April exchanged worried glances and followed at a more sedate pace.
"She works too hard," April murmured, silently wishing her brother would show half as much dedication, but also grateful he wasn't burning himself out either.
Ethan shrugged, "I get the feeling that Sarah was always the type to burn the candle at both ends. She's driven."
"She has no life." April protested, "She needs to get herself a man. Go on a date. Have some fun."
An inexplicable need to defend the young med student arose in Choi. Too many times he had been cajoled the same way, not everyone was comfortable or happy being thrust into things that everyone else deemed as necessary to have fun or a good time.
"Who says she isn't?" Ethan asked lowly, "She said herself she's going to an event tonight."
"An event that happens after six and allows her to get enough rest to be back on shift by two-thirty on a Thursday?" April asked dubiously, "The only thing I know going on is a lecture on trauma medicine being held at McCormick. Noah told me about it, all the med students are encouraged to attend."
"So, he's going?" Choi asked lightly, a tad surprised. The new med student hadn't been on their rotation very long, but after his initial stroke of brilliance with a patient's labs, his performance had been lackluster at best. Ethan didn't picture him as a studier or the lecture-attending type.
A soft sigh left April, "No... I thought maybe if I paired him with Sarah when he started, they'd click, and she'd rub off on him and vice versa. If anything, my baby brother knows how to have fun and Sarah could use a little of that."
"And he could use some of her structure?" Choi offered knowingly. Matchmaking in his opinion never went well for anyone involved and really, he didn't want or need that kind of drama in the ED.
"Something like that." April acknowledged ruefully, her smile a touch amused, "I don't know what Sarah did to him because he certainly has a crush on her. He gets puppy-dog eyes whenever she's around. Unfortunately, she doesn't seem interested."
A faint chuckle erupted behind them and Choi and April turned to find Halstead returning his tablet to the nursing station. His hazel eyes twinkled with the amusement of a well-told joke. He didn't need them to ask as he said, "Puppy dog is right. Reese smacked his nose with a rolled-up paper and now he's smitten."
April's brow furrowed, "What?"
Will shrugged, "I don't know exactly what he did, but I know she was pissed and lit into him before she left her shift. It was his second day...I think? He still had to be here for a bit and looked like a hanged dog all night. He did something and got his hand smacked for it."
Ethan bit back a smile – he had a hard time picturing Sarah bulldozing anyone. It was faintly amusing.
April didn't have the same appreciation, "Noah never said anything to me."
"Maybe he didn't want big sister fighting his battles." Will offered loftily before swallowing nervously as April stared daggers at him, "Just saying, he's gonna have to stand on his own feet sometime."
April crossed her arms and Ethan decided it would be a good time to make his exit.
There was a faint static buzz in her ears. Sarah muffled her hundredth yawn of the day as she shook her head and blinked the treatment room back into focus. The low growl and biting pain in her gut reminded her that she hadn't had anything to eat. She was used to food.
The thought made her frown... Of course, she was used to food, her body needed it... but it seemed worse than normal. It took sadly longer than usual for her to realize why.
Connor.
She wasn't completely oblivious. Mornings with their son, Connor would, sometimes pointedly, other times casually, place a container of yogurt and granola in front of her as she got ready. Sometimes it was cereal as he nudged her to sit next to Callum while he got coffee. Aside from an eye roll she wouldn't make a fuss of it in front of Callum. He hadn't had breakfast with them today.
Not that his obsession with feeding her ended there. She had found protein bars and little snack bags tucked in her bag. Some of them obviously put together with Callum's help. She still wasn't sure when he managed to do that or how she never noticed. They had been too busy dealing with a stressed-out little boy and arguing with each other for those games today. She was literally running on coffee and water, something she hadn't done in over two weeks. It was wild how quickly her body had adapted to the change.
Sarah swallowed that hunger down and finished the last few questions on her patient's history, "Are there any other issues you've been having, Ms. Glind?"
"No. Not unless you have something for being a complete idiot." Ms. Glind uttered dryly as she cradled her wrist to her chest.
Sarah smiled faintly, "I think it's sweet."
"It was stupid." Ms. Glind said with a sigh, "The things we do to make our kids like us... I knew I couldn't do a handspring, but something in me wanted to show off like I was sixteen again. Nailed that cartwheel though."
Sarah chuckled as she caught the shine of victory in the other woman's eyes, "Well hopefully it's just a sprain, but we'll send you up to get a few x-rays and Dr. Halstead will advise your options then."
"Thanks, hun."
Sarah nodded and dipped out of the room to let Doris hand over the necessary paperwork. Maggie stood like a commander behind the nurse's station as she pulled together the next few cases and assigned the proper treatment rooms. There hadn't been an ambulance arrival for the past hour and everyone knew the ED was due for another call-in. It was better to be prepared.
Maggie lifted her head as Sarah approached and frowned unhappily at whatever she saw, "I thought you had to be out of here by six?"
"I do," Sarah said bemused.
"It's ten after." Maggie pointed out quietly.
Sarah blanched and yanked her phone from her pocket. It was after six. She practically flew into the locker room as she threw on her change of clothes and scrambled to grab her things. She still needed to call an Uber.
She was a blur as she texted Meredith and Connor she was running behind and not to wait if she wasn't at the apartment by 6:50 to get Callum to his performance. She'd just meet them at the school.
"Ms. Reese."
Sarah nearly jumped out of her skin as her foot hit the blacktop of the parking lot. Her head whipped around, and she found a familiar town car and chauffeur standing off to the side.
"Andre." She started, having forgotten about the car service Connor had hired.
She hadn't been lying when she mentioned the change in Callum's morning and evening routine – it had been a change for her too as Connor had taken over most of the chauffeur duties. They worked in the same hospital, it only made sense. At least that had been his argument.
"Dr. Rhodes thought you would need a ride tonight." Andre offered as he stepped to the side and opened the car door for her.
A mixture of relief and discomfort flitted through Sarah as she quickly slid inside.
"Mommy!" Sarah blinked startled for the second time in as many minutes at the sight of her son. His sapphire eyes twinkled with barely contained excitement as he launched himself across the car at her, "Daddy said if I was good then I could come with him to pick you up like when you or-or Nana come and pick me up. But-but then he called Mr. Andre and we made - got to stop at McDonald's and I got nuggets. Oh, and we got you food too! Daddy-"
Her wide gaze finally landed on Connor sitting across from her, a soft smile tugging at his lips as he watched Callum prattle. He passed over a bag of takeout to Callum to hand to his mother. Her little man beamed with pride as he held up the brown bag. Sarah accepted it, unsure of how she felt about Callum getting junk food after his behavior that morning.
"Thank you, Baby." Sarah said quietly with a nod towards her ex, "Did Daddy pick you up with Nana Schuler?"
She wouldn't put it past him, especially now that he had been added to the list of approved guardians.
"No." Callum shook his head, "Nana picked me up and we did laundry. She said I need to know how to fold a shirt property."
"Properly." Sarah and Connor corrected together.
"That's what I said." Callum huffed, a faint scowl shadowing his features. Sarah bopped his nose to make him smile before offering him a slightly cold fry.
"Meredith and Marty aren't going to be able to make it to his performance," Connor said as he watched Sarah neglect her food to wipe Callum's face. It was a miracle none of the ketchup had ended up on his shirt, but it was red so it may have just been camouflaged.
"Why? Has something happened?" Sarah shot him a worried glance before she nudged Callum to sit back, "You need to stay seated, Bug. Seatbelt too."
"Pop-pop's sick."
"Marty is having a bad reaction to the new medication that his doctor put him on. I checked him over when I got to yours. He should be okay, but he's resting, and Meredith is staying behind to make sure he doesn't get any worse." Connor explained as his foot tapped hers, "You should eat before seven bellies next to you eats all your food."
Sarah glanced down to see a few more of her fries disappear into Callum's mouth, "Hey!"
Callum erupted into a giggle as he hid behind his hand. She shook her head, unable to stop a smile. He was going to have another growth spurt with the way he had been eating lately. She pulled a salad out and raised a brow as she saw a chicken sandwich as well, "Is this all for me?"
"Wasn't sure how hungry you'd be." Connor murmured, "You didn't have breakfast."
"I'm...hungry." Sarah offered.
Connor tilted his head knowingly at her, "This is the first time you've eaten today."
"No." First time she'd eaten was five minutes ago when she snuck a fry from Callum.
"Okay."
His disbelief was apparent. She refrained from sticking her tongue out at him as she bit into a fry and popped open her salad. Slowly, his words about Marty dawned on her and she muffled a curse. It was too late to be asking Charlotte if Callum could stay the night with them. She'd have to cancel -
Connor frowned as he watched her set aside her food again. This time to dig into her bag for her phone, "What's the matter?"
"The Schulers' were going to have Callum tonight so I could work. I'm going to have to let Derek know I can't cover his shift." Sarah mumbled as she shuffled her scrubs to the side. She just had her phone.
"Seriously." Connor bit out.
Sarah's gaze snapped up into his, not sure why he was so frustrated, "What?"
Connor could only stare at her in disbelief for a long moment, "Do you not remember any of what we argued about this morning?"
"I'm not going to HR," Sarah said as calmly as possible, well aware of the little ears next to her.
"While that would be amazing that wasn't what I was talking about. Maybe, I don't know, the fact that you have a whole other person to depend on for childcare?" Connor stated sourly.
Sarah paused as she glanced down at Callum, "The reason I went to Meredith is because it's a shift in the middle of the night. He would sleep on their couch and head back to our apartment to get ready for school in the morning. And we already discussed that it would be too soon for him to stay at yours. Especially if you can't reach me easily – which you wouldn't with me working."
Connor bit his tongue on the ire that demanded to be spoken. He wasn't faulting the logic in her plan, that wasn't the issue and now really wasn't the place to have this fight. A bitter smile twisted at his lips, and he nodded, "Okay."
"What?" Sarah ground out, not in the mood to deal with passive aggressive prissiness.
"No. You've made all the decisions as per usual." Connor replied coolly.
Callum glanced between his parents sensing the tension rising. He knew the look on his mother's face – it was one he saw when he was trying her patience, but his father looked just as upset, "Are you fighting?"
"Nope."
"No, Bug." Sarah practically threw her phone to Connor as she took her salad backup. She wouldn't call Derek until she finished hashing out... whatever was pissing Connor off now, "Just discussing vigorously."
That made Connor snort, unwillingly amused especially as he caught the confused frown on his son, "What's vigornsty mean?"
"Vigorously." Connor corrected as Sarah was mid bite, "It means doing something with alot strength or power."
That didn't seem to clear anything up for Callum. He didn't really understand how talking could be done with strength and power. Not yet anyway.
It didn't matter as they pulled up to the school and Sarah quickly finished eating her salad before ushering Callum out. Connor followed after, taking a few pictures with his phone as Sarah fussed over their son's shirt and brushed away lint and crumbs only she could see. He smiled as their son fidgeted and looked ready to book it after she rubbed a stain off his cheek. He had a vague memory of his mother doing the same to him once upon a time.
Other families were arriving, and it didn't take long for Sarah and Connor to find Charlotte and Max heading to the side of the cafeteria where many of the other kids were gathering. Callum skipped ahead and Charlotte waved to them and gestured that she would get both the boys where they needed to be.
Sarah only waited long enough to see the boys run through the side door at a pure sprint with an exasperated Charlotte in tow before she turned and ushered Connor back into the hall, "Alright, what? What have I done now?"
There something about the way Sarah worded that question that grated on his nerves, but he pushed past it as he asked, "You really want to do this right now?"
"I'm not sitting through an hour of off-key singing with you vibrating in anger right next to me. Connor, what?" Sarah murmured dourly.
"Okay, why is it when it comes to looking after our son, I'm not on the list of people you come to?" Connor asked, his frustration more than clear, "You go to the Schulers', you go to Charlotte, before you even think to ask me – his father. I get that this is still new. I do, Sarah, but it's like I'm not even in the equation with you. It would be nice if you would come to me, even if you think I can't help. I don't always want to be asking where our son is and what he's doing. I'm playing catch up and you're not making that easier."
Sarah bit back her immediate instinct to go on the defensive. She wanted to say he was wrong, but he wasn't, "...Okay - okay, I'm sorry. I had agreed to take half of Derek Jensen's shift. Two-thirty to six-thirty. Callum was going to stay with the Schulers', but I'm not comfortable with that if Marty isn't doing well. I was going to call Derek and let him know I could no longer take his shift, unless you can think of a way that doesn't require me to go to HR."
He felt like she wasn't fully hearing him, but he didn't disregard the olive branch she was offering. Growing pains, Sarah had called it earlier. Something they were all experiencing it seemed. Connor didn't have a chance to reply as they heard.
"Alright Parents..."
They hurried back into the cafeteria to find their seats as the teachers began the introduction. Connor leaned over to whisper in her ear, "While I think you should cancel anyway – you need the sleep. I can stay at yours tonight and wake up Callum for school... it would keep things somewhat normal for him. He'd be sleeping in his own bed. I don't need to be into the hospital until nine. It's up to you."
"And now here's our Kindergarten class to serenade us with holiday pieces from all over the globe."
Garbled French began to echo through the cafeteria, fully taking Connor's and Sarah's attention as they sat dumbfounded at the incoherent performance taking place on stage. Who had thought it be a good idea to give a group of five-year-old's a melody of foreign languages to sing?
"Oh my God," Sarah muttered lowly.
Connor choked on a laugh and Sarah bit her lip as she reclaimed her phone from him and began to film Callum singing...
It was going to be a long hour.
"Push two of Ativan and get him up upstairs for a CT." Connor directed the next morning as he and Maggie finished triaging a patient brought in from a car crash. On first appearance the wounds looked superficial, but signs of internal bleeding and a laceration in his left side showed more damage than Connor could confidently assess with just his eyes.
Maggie nodded and ushered the patient with Noah over to the next gurney. Halstead was seeing to the other victim as Connor stepped in to check, "How's it going in here?"
Will didn't take his eyes off the man Sarah was currently treating as he answered, "We got this one. Minor laceration, no signs of extensive trauma. We'll send him up to x-ray as a precaution, but other than that he should be good to go. Reese is doing a fine job of removing the glass from the patient's arm if you want to double check her work."
Sarah had been out like a light the moment they had gotten Callum settled the night before and he never heard her leave for her two-thirty shift and had only been able to greet her as she returned at seven to help get Callum to school. She couldn't have gotten more than a few hours of sleep and was now running on hour six of hospital work. It was a point to her stubbornness that the only outward sign of her fatigue was the circles darkening her eyes.
Connor stepped behind her and peered at the gash in the patient's arm. Shards pebbled the exposed tissue, and he winced in sympathy. He would need a few sutures, but glue would hold the rest, "Careful when you remove these pieces up here. They're deeper than the others and will start bleeding down into the area you've just cleared immediately. You're going to need extra gauze and saline to clean and clot."
Sarah took his instruction silently, nodding to show she understood.
"Call me when you're ready to stitch." Connor glanced pointedly at Will and the ED doctor barely refrained from rolling his eyes but nodded to show he had heard and understood as well. Don't let the med student fuck up. He got it.
Connor lingered for a moment longer before heading upstairs to prep his OR. Will shook his head as he watched him go, "You're doing good, Sarah. Don't let him rattle you."
Sarah paused, straining to keep her expression blank as a wave of wry amusement tore through her. She must have failed as Halstead arched a brow and asked, "What?"
"Dr. Rhodes was just being thorough. He actually answered a concern I had and was going to ask you." Sarah murmured quietly, feeling a little protective of her ex. She had to wonder when Will would get over this insecurity he had with Connor.
"Oh..." Will shifted awkwardly, "Is there anything else you have a question about."
Sarah shook her head, mouth twitching as she kept her gaze locked on her patient's arm. From her peripheral she could see her patient watching the interplay with vague interest, but his attention was more on his arm, "Are you in pain? We can apply more anesthetic if you need."
The patient frowned and shook his head, "No - no pain, but I don't think I can move my arm at all. I've been trying to wiggle my fingers for the past few minutes and... nothing."
Sarah paled, worried she had nicked something while removing the shards. She looked uncertainly at Halstead who had moved forward to examine his arm and Sarah's work. He trailed a finger under the patient's palm, "Do you feel anything? Pressure?"
The patient shook his head, "No... but would the anesthetic -?"
Halstead looked grim, "Not normally, but it is a possibly. I'm gonna have Sarah finish dressing your laceration and then I'm going to send you up to get a CT scan as well as some x-rays. It could just be your body coping from the shock of the crash. We'll run a few tests and get a few more answers before we start to panic, okay?"
The patient nodded his head warily and Sarah felt dread begin to pool into her stomach. A faint tremor jostled her hand as she moved to pull out the last of the glass. It took all her willpower to keep calm as she got hold of the tiny pieces. She breathed through her nose. A weight settled with the dread as Halstead moved around behind her, placing gauze and saline on her tray. Rushing her.
He disappeared to the other side of her with a few vials in hand as he began to apply a tourniquet to the other arm. April seemingly appeared from nowhere as she began to draw blood, labeling and scanning the vials with an efficiency that Sarah currently envied.
The last big shard pulled free, and Sarah stifled a panicked gasp as the wound began to do exactly what Connor said it would. Blood seeped out quicker than a flash flood and Sarah silently cursed as she scrambled for the gauze.
"Whoa..." Will uttered, twisting to elevate the patients arm a little as she applied pressure, "Alright, Sarah, grab the saline and spray it over the laceration while the gauze is in place and then grab a fresh pad to replace it when I tell you."
Sarah nodded shakily.
"Alright. One, two...Three."
She moved swiftly and between the two of them the arm was wrapped in seconds. She breathed out as she asked tentatively, "What about the sutures?"
"He needs to go to imaging first. Rhodes will have to wait a little longer." Halstead muttered as he pushed through the paperwork to get his patient upstairs, "I'll give him the update while you take these vials down to the lab."
April handed her the vials and printed orders and Sarah nodded, thankful that she had a reason to escape. She couldn't shake the feeling that she had done something wrong, but Will hadn't noticed anything and neither had Connor when he had examined what she had already done. Still the feeling lingered.
She made it to the lab window in record time and suddenly remembered who worked there. Jaded blue eyes shined at her from behind a thick pair of glasses. A faint smirk twisted at Joey's mouth as she slid the vials and paperwork onto the counter, "Hey Reese, nab anyone's sugar this morning?"
"You're not going to let that go, are you?" Sarah asked, an embarrassed heat rising up her neck.
Joey chuckled, "Well, I know I need the little extra sweetness. I seemed to have been born with a shortness of it."
Unwillingly, Sarah felt her lips twitch, "That's awful."
"Isn't it?" Joey teased as he scanned in her lab work, "I think you should make it up to me."
A new sinking feeling began to seep into her belly, but also something she hadn't felt in a long time. The twitch of butterfly wings. She bit her lip before asking, "And how would I do that?"
"Dinner. Tomorrow." Joey said easily.
She was startled by the streak of disappointment that befell her as she replied, "Sorry, I'm working tomorrow night."
Joey must have sensed it because his smirk turned to a gentle smile as he said, "That's okay. I am too. Meet you in the cafeteria at seven?"
"Six-thirty?" Sarah offered... it wasn't really a date-date. Not if it was happening the hospital... Right? She could do this.
"Deal. I'll see you then." Joey grinned and set her paperwork to the top of his pile.
Sarah felt her smile blossom and for a brief moment she forgot about what had brought her down to the lab in the first place.
A kind of date...
Her first since Connor.
This was a good thing.
Right?