The wind's whistle in his ears was so loud he thought it'll leave him deaf, and his own yelling was adding up to that noise. In the terrifying mess of smoke and ground escaping from underneath his feet, he could see his younger brother cry and their parents grab a parachute backpack and put it on his back and strap his younger brother, Alex, to him. Before Scott knew it he and his brother were saying their last goodbyes before being forced to jump out of the flaming plane.
Wind's blow was no better out here than it was in the damaged plane. The pressure was hitting his face and his brother was clutching his ribcage so tightly it made it hard to breathe.
He heard Alex call his name in fear, with tearing eyes he looked down at him, and he saw the straps holding him to him were hardly managing. He wrapped him in his arms and looked at the smoke-covered plane that was quickly falling away from them. He thought he could still see his father for a moment, but neither of their parents jumped out.
He almost wanted to break down right there and then, skydiving toward the ocean with his younger brother holding onto him. But he knew it was the fractals of the seconds when he needs to be composed and foremost - keep Alex safe.
He didn't know exactly when he should open the parachute. He watched movies and loved planes ever until now, but in the rush and fever of the moment, he couldn't tell how far the raging ocean is.
"Hold on!" he called to his brother, one arm wrapped around him, he used the other hand to pull the string of his parachute, and he was roughly dragged up in the air with the aggressive wind- straps that held Alex tied to him suddenly gave in and the boy's grip was not enough, before the thought fully occurred to him, Alex was falling towards the ocean while Scott just held out his hand, calling his name on top of his lungs, but the boy quickly disappeared into the water.
Scott's heart was beating so fast, he wanted to unstrap right there and then and dive down head-on into the sea, find Alex. But before his hands found the right button, a huge wave captured him a dozen feet above the surface of the water. Before he even had the time to catch a breath he was forced into the freezing depth, instantly feeling water get into his nostrils and cause his lungs to ache.
He wanted to swim to the surface but the parachute's strings coiled around his legs and the waves dragged him further into this trap. That was when Scott thought it was over. That he won't make it, and that neither will his family. His parents didn't get out of the plane, they couldn't possibly survive. And Alex... but Alex could still be alive, there was a chance he was floating up there and he's okay. Scott knew he can't give up even if only for his brother.
Scott slipped off the backpack and kicked away the strings. He had no air, his chest was spasming and he could tell he was only mare fractals of seconds away from losing consciousness and dying in this endless depth. He kicked toward the surface with all strength he could muster.
The moment his head finally popped out of the water he only managed to inhale hoarsely once before another wave had him underwater for a moment. Returning to the surface he began to cough out the water, spasms painfully gripping his lungs.
As quickly as he managed to inhale he tried to call his brother's name; "Alex" was a hoarse and suffocated call.
He coughed out once more and this time called loud and clear;
"Alex!" he looked around, but as waves swayed him up and down all he could see was an endless night over the ocean. "ALEX!"
All he heard in return was raging wind and the waves. "ALEX!" he kept yelling whenever the ocean would let him draw a breath. It didn't help that his body began to break into continuous shudders as the freezing cold water numbed him.
He didn't know how long he floated there, calling and searching for his brother, trying not to lose consciousness and give in to the exhaustion, or lose self-control and give in to the guilt.
Even when he saw the lights of a helicopter he wasn't sure if he can make it. And with his family gone, he was scared to face life without them.
When lights were cast directly at him and blinded him to the point when he barely noticed some people descending into the water with him, he felt he was not able to hold on to consciousness anymore.
Just as he saw everything turn black and began to slip underwater, he felt a strong arm grab him and pull him up.
Scott woke up abruptly, still feeling his frozen limbs and the hand on his forearm. He hit the light on his nightstand and slipped on his sunglasses. Breathing heavily he opened his eyes and with a thundering heart examined his arm. No hand was there grabbing it, but the shadow of its grip felt very real.
He took a deep breath as he pressed pillows of his palms to his forehead. For a moment he just remained like that, shaking off the impact of those memories.
"Alex..." he rasped low.
Episode 9.5: THE CONSEQUENCE
+That morning, Xavier's Institute+
During summer break, the days started lazily as students munched their breakfast and muttered sleepy good mornings to the new arrivals in the kitchen. At least half of them would rather be asleep and it showed, however the morning training they had scheduled by- and with- Mr Logan made it so that everyone eventually arrived downstairs for their first calorie kick of the day, every morning. Usually, while the atmosphere was rather slow, there was no gloom or apparent unhappiness.
Yet this particular morning Scott slumped down on the table where Ororo, Fallen, Kurt and Kitty were already present, his expression more serious and joyless than per usual.
"Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the bed, or is it just my impression?" Kurt asked, watching the older boy.
"You could say that" Summers replied, clearly irritable.
"You certainly look like someone kicked you in the face for the starter of a day" Fallen lifted her eyebrow slightly.
"I feel the part, too."
"Oh man, I don't see you so down very often. What set you off so bad?" Wagner looked uncertain.
Scott grimaced. "I had a dream that I haven't really enjoyed."
"Good morning everyone" Jean walked into the kitchen, looking fresh as ever. "How was your night?" she smiled at the five peers by the table.
"Scott had a bad nightmare" Kitty reported, considering it only natural that Jean would be of more help to Scott than any of them at most times.
Grey immediately expressed concern as she approached the table with a greek yogurt in her hands and her eyes transfixed on the brunet. "Is it about Alex again?"
"Who's Alex?" Kitty blinked with interest.
"Scott's brother" Jean replied.
"Oh!" Kitty's eyes sparkled up. "Can we meet him? Or do you guys like, hate each other? That's why you have nightmares?"
She considered Scott obviously handsome, so she figured there was a great chance his brother would be good-looking as well.
"He's dead" Scott replied killing Pryde's hopes instantly.
Her shoulders slumped in shame for being so enthusiastic about the deceased sibling of her team leader. "…Sorry… What happened?"
"Our plane crashed. I was the only survivor" Scott responded in a lowered tone. It made him feel especially bitter when he thought about how they decided not to fish out the wreckage as the ocean was far too deep in that area, so the bodies were never recovered. Empty coffins were buried in their hometown just so saying goodbyes would come easy. It never did. Scott got past that and moved on, but on days like this, his own dreams lured him back to the thoughts about the tragic incident.
"What's with the icy atmosphere?" Evan said the second he came into the kitchen and looked at the group briefly on his way to grab a sweet bun. Before anyone had time to reply he waved his hand. "Anyway. Just wanted to let everyone know I'm headed to the skatepark. Later!"
Scott and Ororo's voices rose at the same time to stop him; "Woah! Hold on! We-"
"Evan, you're not going anywhere when we-"
"-have a training" they finished almost in unison.
Daniels put his hands up in the air briefly before realizing he needs a hand to remove the bun from his mouth to speak; "Easy easy! I've still got almost 40 minutes. I'll be back in time! Later!"
"Oh really? Because last time you were late and-"
But Evan already walked away and didn't hear Scott's accusations so the young leader instead started to complain to whoever would listen that Evan isn't invested enough in being part of their team.
Halfheartedly listening to Summers' rant Fallen felt Kurt's burning stare from the opposite side of the table. The boy's eyes clearly asked her to realize something and she didn't need much time to know it was about Scott's false idea about his brother's death. She gave him the slightest shake of her head. Not right now.
xXx
The chance to discuss Scott and his brother didn't come about before nor throughout the training, but whenever Fallen's eyes met Kurt's she saw the urgency and hesitancy pool in his gaze; she couldn't help the sorry look in her own eyes that she responded with throughout the two hours of the training. They couldn't discuss it during the training, but nearly the same situation from almost two months ago was on both of their minds.
A very similar, if a colder day, another morning when Scott was woken up by a nightmare about his supposedly-dead brother, and apparently that one was one bad enough that he projected emotions in his sleep for both Jean and Professor to pick up on and wake them up with a start. After hearing about it from Grey who later explained it because Kurt questioned Scott's odd, stand-offish behavior during the breakfast, Wagner couldn't get it off his mind, especially since Summers' out-of-character behavior continued throughout the day. But Fallen shut down the idea of telling Scott the truth.
After their training that day Kurt had the quickest shower he had in the longest time, because his storming thoughts needed to be heard. He was still toweling his hair when he entered Fallen's room and immediately started; "Did you see how distracted Scott was during the training?"
The girl lifted her eyes off her homework. "Scott's what you're thinking about while in the shower, really?" she gave him a critical, but mischievous look.
The boy stopped in the dead middle of her room and let the towel hang down his shoulders as he looked at her with a small grimace. "He's always focused. This dream really had him shaken."
Fallen placed aside her schoolwork and rolled her eyes slightly. "So now you're going to fret because big brave Scotty had a nightmare?"
Wagner arched his brow in disagreement. "I'm just concerned for my friend. What's wrong with that?"
"It was just a dream, calm down."
"You know it's a lot more than that" Kurt's tone was strangely harsh.
"So what?" Harris stood up. She was annoyed with how fierce he was about the case. "We can't play with the fate so much. Hell knows what may happen!"
"Exactly! It may turn out for good as well and we may help a friend but you'd always rather expect the worst! So how about for once you consider how others would feel about the changes?"
"When deciding on something like this you need to consider facts, not anyone's feelings!"
Kurt snorted and looked up for a second as if looking for patience, shaking his head ever so slightly. "Not considering anyone's feelings, huh? Must come easy to you" he gave her a cold glare. "But guess what, just because you don't know what it feels like to lose someone you love doesn't mean that I don't" he muttered and instantly teleported away.
When he was gone Fallen all shifted, stunned by his outburst and her own behavior. She ran her eyes over the room and exhaled slowly through her lips. "Wow" she grimaced.
After that encounter, she felt like she needed someone to talk to, and for once that someone couldn't be Kurt.
"I never saw him this angry with me before" her voice was muffled by her arms as she rested on the iron table where Forge was assembling one of his newest 'genius devices'. "I get irritated easily, but Kurt…?"
"Nah, he just really wants to help Scott find his brother" Jonathon gave her a quick, encouraging smile before shifting his eyes back to the wires and continuing to solder them together with his biomechanical arm. "Don't take it so hard."
"But we don't fight like that, Forge. That's not who we are" the girl replied with a defeated sigh. She dropped her face flat into her folded arms. "And I'm beginning to think he's got a point, insisting to go for it. You know, maybe he's right, maybe I AM too negative by thinking that anything we do may cause the end of the world."
"Truth is, it really can cause the end of the world" Forge examined his device up close. Fallen's discouraged eyes lifted from her arms. "It's always true, especially if you travel to the past like we did" Forge nodded his head with approval of his work and continued to attach another element as he spoke; "From a scientific perspective there's no chance big changes won't occur anyway, and basically anything anyone does here may end up disastrous. Chaos theory. You can't avoid changes. Yeah, sure, you may end up making bad ones, but not doing something might be that change as well."
"So what should we do? Make the changes or not?"
Forge shrugged, turning his back to her to pick a tiny screw from one of the many containers laid out around his workstation. "We can't just choose not to make changes. We already made them. Even just you and me being here is a major one. You can't control where this is going, we can merely try to stir the direction of the changes. I call it: guide the tide" he made a flowy move with his regular hand.
"But we don't know if it won't come back to bite us in the ass."
"You never know. But like I said, neither you can know where it's going without your participation. The best option there is, is to try and predict the consequences as much as our limited human brains allow us."
That day two months ago, they took some time to each think about the other's point of view and eventually made amends concluding that they promised to the Professor not to interfere so they won't do anything, however hard it will be to watch Scott sigh sadly and exist half-heartedly. They didn't argue about it anymore or do anything about it and eventually Summers returned to his old self. The fact that they stuck with what she insisted - that being not telling Scott about his brother - made Fallen feel all the more guilty now, that they were granted a green light to switch things up.
Now, the guilt uncomfortably stirred in her every time she met Kurt's eyes throughout this training, when Scott was distracted and unlike himself again due to a nightmare he probably wouldn't have had if they told him the truth all those weeks ago. She felt stupid for her cowardice back then - that's what it felt like she was by choosing to keep the truth under lock and key: a coward.
After this training, Kurt stopped at the door of his room and, with one hand on the handle, waited for her, his gaze expectant and unwavering on her own. She nodded ever so slightly, agreeing to resolve the previous issue right away. She followed him inside his room.
Everything became quieter when he closed the door, muffling the sound of chatter and footsteps of the others headed to their own rooms. Fallen took a deep breath looking at the open balcony where she met Kurt after their argument about the issue those two months ago.
Back then she hadn't come to talk to him until the twilight; when she finally did, he was perched on the balustrade, catching the last sunrays, looking somewhat angry and irritated. Rightfully so, she thought. As soon as he looked over his shoulder and met her eyes, they both shifted their gazes away almost sheepishly and instead faced the ocean. Neither of them said a word at first, heavy with guilt and shame over how they acted earlier.
Eventually, after a lingering moment of standing beside him, Fallen picked up in a lowered voice;
"You're right, Kurt..." her eyes were cast on the ocean. "I don't love people easily... Only you mean that much to me. But I do know what it's like to lose the person you feel that way about."
Wagner also didn't shift his eyes off the wild water ahead. His voice was some mix of disappointment, anger, and pleading. "...So why can't you be more compassionate towards other people?"
Fallen was silent for a moment. Eventually, she dropped her eyes down to the pool almost directly below the balcony. "...I don't want it to break me."
That was what made Kurt look at her at last. The slight frown on his face was that of worry and confusion.
Harris lifted her eyes to meet his gaze. "...If I try to put myself in their shoes and understand their situation... and I imagine you're the one I lose..." she whispered and shifted her gaze to the landscape again. "I feel it chip away pieces of me instantly. And I don't want to break."
Wagner exhaled slowly, reaching his hand to her face and gently rubbing her cheek as he brushed back her hair. "I hate fighting with you" he whispered.
The girl closed her eyes, grabbing his hand on her cheek gently and kissing the palm of it. "And I, with you. I'm sorry for being so stubborn and uncompromising sometimes..."
And now, two months later, with a refreshed mindset, she stood in the middle of his room feeling as sorry as she did that day. At last, she turned around to find Kurt just looking at her, patient but almost fearful of what he might hear.
"So?" he asked simply in a low voice.
He didn't need to say anything else, she knew the entirety of the question as well as her answer. She nodded her head almost as if an invisible force tried to stop it and she needed to jerk it with extra effort. "You were right the first time. Scott should know the truth. Who am I to decide to keep it from him?"
xXx
"What did you get in the third problem?" Jean asked, looking critically at her homework.
"62" Summers replied absently.
"62?" Grey arched her eyebrow looking up. "I got 4."
The boy massaged his forehead with a sigh. "You probably got it right, I'm just…"
"Distracted?" she aided before putting her hand on his shoulder with a compassionate smile. "I understand."
"Sorry" he exhaled. "I'll be back to being myself tomorrow, after a good night's sleep."
Today, however, whether he wanted it or not, he was taken over by resentment and an odd, rusty form of mourning that he felt ashamed for giving into.
A knocking came from the open door of his room, they both turned to see two of their younger teammates looking somewhat troubled.
"Kurt, Fallen, something's wrong?" Summers straightened his back, becoming instantly alert with the seriousness of their faces.
Wagner cracked a half-hearted smirk. "Not really. We just wanted to talk to you for a moment" saying so he glanced back at Fallen who didn't seem completely content with being included in whatever this is.
"Um, alright" Scott arched his brow with slight confusion. "Come in then, talk."
"It's quite, um, private" Wagner gave Grey an apologetic smile.
The girl got up.
"I don't think it's necessary-"
"It's alright, Scott" the redhead squeezed his shoulder and smiled briefly. "I'll be in my room."
She collected her notebooks and sent soft smiles to the two younger friends as she passed them in the doorway. They waited a moment for her to enter her own room before fully walking into Summers'. Fallen closed the door softly and looked around briefly; she didn't make it a habit to visit people - other than Kurt and Forge - in their bedrooms and it was her first time having a proper look at Scott's. Of course, it looked almost the same as any bedroom at the Institute, except walls were littered with posters and a few collectible car models ornamented the shelves.
Her gaze turned to the boy sitting in his office chair by the desk; Summers looked at Wagner and gestured to a beanbag sitting close by, but Kurt resisted lounging there and gazed at his friend with the expression of a man with a mission.
"Your brother isn't dead, he's in Hawaii under the last name of Masters" he blurted out like a confession that was bottled up for far too long.
At first, Scott's face expressed blank surprise before distorting in a reproaching frown. "If this is your idea of a joke then-"
"I'm not trying to make fun of you!" Wagner threw his arms in the air with exasperation. "He survived the plane crash, you two were to reunite soon but we- I thought you should know already" he finished in a softer tone.
For a lingering moment, there was silence and Scott's stare was intense enough that even the sunglasses couldn't conceal it. All of sudden he got up, the chair he sat on hitting the desk behind him.
"Is it true?" he asked low.
"Ja- yes."
"Then why didn't you tell me earlier?" Summers' voice gained power as he approached the boy.
"What-?"
"If you knew all along, why didn't you tell me about Alex!" it was hard to tell what emotions are in him, his voice was strong but cold. "Why did you wait to tell me?!"
"I…" Kurt was surprised at the outburst. "Look, man, I'm really sorry but we weren't supposed to tell any-... Nh!" he cut off when the taller boy roughly grabbed his collar.
"This is about my brother, it's not something you can just keep from me!" he said through his teeth.
Fallen frowned at the aggression of the boy's actions and tone but didn't choose to interfere just yet.
Kurt's surprise also turned into a frown and he firmly shoved Scott's hand off of himself. "Listen, not only are you trying to harass a teammate, but also someone who tries to help you find your brother. THIS" he briefly tugged on his shirt where Summers grabbed it moments before, "is not what a leader should act like. Much less a friend" he stared back at him firmly.
Scott swallowed, stepping back. "I'm sorry. This whole situation with Alex brings the worst out of me."
Kurt exhaled and put one hand on his shoulder. "I understand that, man. But we're on one side" he told Summers.
The brunet looked between the two younger teens. "But I still can't imagine why you'd wait to tell me if you knew all along."
"We made a promise to the Professor" Fallen spoke up at last. "It was a part of the deal of being here. We weren't supposed to interfere with the reality in any way, shape, or form if we could help it" she sighed at long last unfolding her arms. "But things changed. Now Professor is keener on using what we know in whatever way feels like could benefit our new future."
Scott didn't need to think long about it before asking; "Does telling me about my brother have to do with benefiting us in the future?"
Fallen thought briefly of the circumstances in which the two brothers would've reunited otherwise, the way Magneto would have manipulated them both to participate in his experiment and stand against the X-Men. If they reunite early and are warned beforehand things will turn out differently, but there is no telling how exactly.
"Maybe. Maybe not. We'll just have to see about it."
xXx
Soon as Scott got on the internet he searched for 'Alex Masters'. Photos of strangers showed up along some random images and sites. He added 'Hawaii' to his search and hit enter again. This time most of the search results concerned a Surfing Club in Hawaii, some of which were group photos of the members.
The boy opened one of the said photos and zoomed in on the pixelated members. As he ran his eyes over them his eyes stopped dead on one of the faces.
It's been 9 years, but he would have recognized this face even after many more than that.
He felt his heart skip a beat and linger for a moment. A part of him felt that it didn't make sense, it couldn't be real. And yet he knew that this tan, blonde boy grinning at the foot of the group was his little brother.
He quickly grabbed a pencil and a sticky note from the side of the desk and scribbled down the number to the Surfing Club.
xXx
"It's him" Scott said the moment he entered the living room as if everyone gathered were waiting for confirmation. However they all, but the pair on the sofa, looked at him with confusion.
"Who is who?" Evan asked, but Summers nearly completely ignored him, and everyone else, addressing Kurt and Fallen directly;
"I called his club and they put me through with him."
"With who?" this time it was Jean, and the tall boy actually shifted his attention to her.
"Alex."
The girl's green eyes widened in shock. "He's- he's alive?"
Slowly everybody else's faces followed suit in expressing utmost surprise and confusion as they realized that the Alex in question must be Scott's supposedly dead little brother. Now the young leader was forced to retell the story of the plane crash to everybody who haven't heard it before; he concluded by telling them how Fallen and Kurt just now decided to let him know he was to reunite with Alex at some point in the future, allowing him to contact him earlier.
"So… What do you want to do now?" Jean asked once he finished.
Summers didn't hesitate long before getting up to his feet decisively. "I'll book tickets to go and see him."
"Or you could invite him here" Fallen suggested.
xXx
"Of course, I'd be happy to accommodate your brother at the Institute, Scott" the man assured, although his smile still faltered at the thought of actively meddling with what fate had in store.
Summers responded with a nod of appreciation. "Thank you, Professor. I'll call him right away."
He left the day room and headed for the nearest phone in one of the hallways. He needed to remind himself not to break into an urgent sprint. Intellectually he knew that rushing at this point doesn't change anything, but emotionally all he could think about is the fact that his baby brother is alive and well, and he wanted nothing more than to see that with his own eyes. He couldn't push away the memories of that night as he waited on the line; the whistle of wind in his ears, the dull hum of the ocean around him as the cold water surrounded him, the terror of not being able to find Alex.
The memories were broken up by the sound of Alex's voice on the phone.
"Hey there, Scotty!"
Summers' lips slightly twitched before he smiled. "What's up, buddy? I talked to my Professor and guess what he said?"
"I can come?" he sounded so much older than when he last saw him, but the excited edge to his voice reminded him of the kid brother he lost years ago.
"Sure you can, and I'm sure everybody here will be happy to meet you. When do you have time?"
"Scott, considering that we didn't see each other that long, I'm sure everyone will understand if I leave this very minute. I'll make time and book a flight for tomorrow."
"Awesome! Give me a call at the mansion when you know around what time to pick you up from the airport."
"You got it. Hey, my parents are waiting to hear the news, I'll go talk to them and then see what I can do about the flight."
"Sure."
"I'll talk to you later, then" the younger boy chuckled. "Bye!"
"Bye."
The line went silent and Scott put the phone back down, but kept his hand on it for another moment, watching it shake slightly. It was all becoming more real in his mind - Alex being alive, living a life in Hawaii, with adopted family, friends, surfing club. He was older now, but it was a young man that grew from the child he remembered from the time in his life that was so much simpler than anything that came after.
"Scott."
Jean's soft voice made him snap back and he gazed at her. She had that look on her face that made it impossible for him to play pretend in front of her. It was like she already knew what was on his mind, without even using her powers.
"He's going to book a flight for tomorrow" he said.
"You must be happy to see him again" she smiled as she approached close. "So what are you worried about then?"
"Is it that obvious?"
"You always are."
"Is that an insult?" he arched his brow. She gave him the look. He eased. "I feel guilty for giving up on him that night. I should have kept looking."
"He's alright" Grey's hand closed on his shoulder. "That's all that matters. I'm sure he doesn't resent you."
Scott stared ahead for a moment before responding. "Maybe he should."
xXx
The La Guardia Airport in New York City's Queens was busy at all times, all year around, but Jean and Scott had no problem finding empty chairs. Scott continued to recall childhood stories about his brother as he did on the over-and-hour drive from Bayville. He was glad Jean agreed to come along and was a keen listener, it helped him get out of his head and release some of that excitement he felt about reuniting with his brother.
It was barely registering that he was about to see Alex again.
No wonder that for the last dozen of minutes before his brother's flight was scheduled to land he was already on his feet, walking in circles in front of Jean who sat and observed him with a soft smile. A few minutes before the time, he ushered Jean to come with him and wait at the arrival gate. They found a spot just by the stanchions before a small crowd formed around them.
Minutes passed by, and there was no radio information about the flight arriving. People's gazes started turning to the FIDS displays, which only listed it as 'delayed' without a specific time.
Scott felt slightly irritated that he was made to wait when his excitement was at its highest, but he tried to find solace in resuming his conversation with Jean. Another dozen minutes later that stopped working, and he looked over at the displays again. Still delayed. No other information. He looked at the time; it was nearly half an hour past the scheduled landing.
His eyes skimmed the crowd of families and friends waiting to welcome the arrivals like he did. There was concern, irritation and confusion on most of the faces as more people glanced at the watch and FIDS displays. Somebody pulled away from the group and headed for the Information Desk. A young girl slumped against a male family member's leg with boredom, asking when her parents are coming.
Finally, the first person headed in their direction from inside the gate, rousing the crowd. When they came close enough people could see by their uniform that it was actually an airport employee; the middle-aged man looked pale, his baggy eyes sparkling with something alarming. The crowd gathered behind the stanchions started whispering and frowning, some loudly asking questions about the unexplained delay.
The airport employee lifted his hand to stop the rising flood of questions.
"On behalf of Continental Airlines, I'm very sorry to inform all of you that flight 4514… had crashed an hour ago."
The sudden chaos that erupted was a cacophony of cussing, crying, praying, and shrieks of emotional anguish. But all Scott could hear was a pressure rising and clogging his ears, and a terrible screech in his head as every fiber of his being attempted to reject the reality.
It was barely registering that he was not about to see Alex again, after all.
A/N: I don't know if this episode/chapter is long enough to be split into two parts, but tbh I don't even have the other half fully written yet, so I'm giving you what I've got and then maybe I'll just reupload it as a full episode. My uploading methods on this site are a mess anyway, as is my entire writing/drawing process. (she said casually after killing off a character)