Once we're at the medical building, Akari holds my hand as my ankle and knee are put back in their socket. The knee is especially excruciating. So much so that Akari tries her best to muffle a painful scream of her own when I squeeze her hand.

"Sorry."

She shakes her hand, "It's okay. It's p-probably only a fraction of what you felt, right?"

I nod. "Probably."

The nurse sits down next to the hospital bed with a grim look on her face. "You're going to have to use a wheelchair again. Probably for two weeks or so. Hopefully we can do crutches or a cane after that. The swelling on your knee is going to be bad, so it will probably be at least a month before you're back to full speed. "

I nod.

After the nurse leaves Akari and I sit silently for a while I ice my knee and ankle.

After about 20 minutes of uncharacteristic silence between us, Akari puts her hand on my shoulder and says, "Maybe this is a s-silly question right now…b-but are you okay?"

I lie. "Yeah, just bummed out about this."

She nods, "Your m-mom should be here soon. Do you want to be at home or Yamaku?"

"Home."

"Okay, I'll g-go with you."

"Actually, can you stay here?"

She looks disappointed, "You…d-don't want me to c-come?"

I give her a fake smile, "Nah. Some alone time with my mom sounds kind of nice. If I'm still down there tomorrow you can come."

She looks a little hurt, but she seems to buy my explanation. I don't like how much I just lied to her. But I need to get away from her and think about some things.

—-

Once we're home, my mom collapses on the couch in exhaustion after having to unload the wheelchair on her own.

"Sorry you had to do that."

"It's fine. But it does seem to be getting harder. I guess aging really is a thing, huh?"

I laugh softly, "Guess so."

My mom sits up and looks at me, "Are you okay? I mean, I know you have an awful injury and how it happened was no fun…but there's something else bothering you, isn't there.

Apparently, it's obvious to everyone. Or…at least it is to the two people who know me best in the whole world.

I sigh and put my hand to my forehead, "I realized something today…and I think it's really bad."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

"Yeah…it's the main reason I wanted to come here. And without Akari."

"Oh…it's about her?"

"Yeah."

"Did you two have another fight?"

"No."

"Well, is she doing okay?"

"Yes, mom just…give me a second. I'll tell you. It's…really hard for me to say."

I take a deep breath. Maybe I shouldn't say this out loud. Hell, I haven't even thought it yet, not in these exact words. Maybe if I don't it will go away. But I'm kidding myself. I can tell that it won't. It's too strong. Too deep. It's overwhelming me from the inside. It's like there was a dam holding these feelings in place, but now it's been broken and they are spilling out everywhere. If I don't say something I'm going to drown. I need to tell my mom. She'll be able to help me decide what to do.

I bite the bullet and say the words that I'm feeling.

"I love her."

"Of course you do. She's your best friend. More than a friend, really…"

I lock eyes with my mom. "No, mom. I love her."

My mom's confused expression slowly turns into one of surprise and then to one of concern. She moves closer to me and takes my hand.

"When did this happen?"

I sigh, "I don't know. All the pieces came together today but…I've been feeling different about her for a month probably. I've fell…extra close to her and have been cherishing all our time together. I just didn't realize it was…romantic until today."

I start to cry as I feel the weight of my dilemma and fear for what it might mean. "I d-don't know what to d-do about it, mom…she's m-my best friend…"

My mom rubs by shoulder and gently says, "Does she like girls?"

"Not…that I know of. I…didn't know I did."

My mom hugs me and says, "I think you should tell her."

"What?! How? Want me to just walk up to her and say, 'Oh hey Akari, we've been best friends for a year and a half. Turns out I'm in love with you. What do you think about that?'"

"I'm sorry sweetie, I know this is different in some ways. But listen, you are close friends. The closest, really. It isn't unlike me and your dad, okay? It doesn't matter that you're both girls-"

I interrupt her and snap, "Really? Because I think that might matter to Akari."

"I know, sweetie. You're right, but she would understand because of the bond you two have. If she doesn't feel the same way about you, it will hurt, but I don't think she'd choose to give up on the friendship. I don't think you would either. When I confessed to your father, that is part of what gave me the courage to do it. If I thought there was a real risk our friendship would be completely destroyed, I probably never would have done it. But I knew we cared enough about one another that we would find a way to remain friends, no matter what. I think that's true for you two."

"Yeah…I guess so."

"Look, I guess I'm a little out of my element here, so if you don't want to trust my advice, I guess I don't blame you. Have you talked to Daisuke about this?"

"No. You're the first person I said this out loud to."

"Well, you have my advice now. If you want it from someone who might understand the other part of it, you should talk to him."

I nod, "Yeah…that's a good idea." I sigh. "I just..I wish I didn't feel this way. It complicates things so much."

"When your aunt made me realize I loved your father…that was my first instinct. To wish I didn't feel that way, so things could just go back to how they were. He was my best friend. I was worried these feelings were going to ruin that."

I nod, "Yeah, that's how I feel now."

She smiles at me. "Well…you know how things ended up with me and your father. Again, I know this isn't the same. She…she may not be capable of feeling the same for you. But there is a chance…and I don't think the risk of telling her is that high because of your strong friendship."

"Yeah…that's true. That does make it feel less…weighty. We won't lose our friendship."

My mom nods and smiles at me.

"Okay. I'm going to call Daisuke and see what he says. But I think...I think I have to tell her. It might hurt to get rejected, but not telling her is already eating me up. Maybe Daisuke has some advice on the specifics…I wonder if he has confessed to someone who he wasn't sure was attracted to…people of the same sex?"

My mother smiles, "I know it isn't exactly the same…but when you confessed to Daisuke, there were some similarities, weren't there? He isn't attracted to people of your gender and Akari might not be either, right?"

"That's true. But I didn't know that was true about Daisuke at the time."

She nods, "Well, you don't know for sure if Akari isn't attracted to girls, right? I know it's different. I'm just saying that the situation with Daisuke ended up working out well, all things considered. Because you were such close friends. You two even became closer after that, didn't you?"

I nod, thank my mom, and then go to my bedroom and call Daisuke.

"Hey Kayoko, how are things at Yamaku?"

"Hi Daisuke, they are…interesting. How's college?"

"Good, loving it so far. What makes things 'interesting' for you?"

"Well. I'm in love with Akari."

"You're…what!?"

I laugh wryly, "Even you're surprised, huh?"

"Well, yeah…a little. I knew you were close, but…"

"Yeah, I only entirely figured it out today. But I am 100 percent sure of it."

"So…you're gay?"

"Well, no…I like guys too. I haven't really thought of how to label myself. It is pretty far down my list of concerns right now."

"...right, sorry. So…you're going to confess to Akari?"

"Yeah…I was just wondering…did you ever confess to someone where you were unsure of their…orientation?"

There's a moment of silence. "I did. But I don't know if hearing about it will help you."

"Went that bad, huh? I guess I want to hear it anyway."

"It was…pretty bad, yeah. He was the first friend I made at Yamaku. After about a month I realized I liked him, so I told him. He freaked out and never spoke to me again."

"Great. Just what I needed to hear."

He laughs, "That won't happen here, though. You two haven't just been friends for a month. But…I guess I would say…prepare yourself for the very real possibility of rejection."

I sigh, "Yeah. I think rejection is basically my expectation now. But I have to tell her."

"Well, good luck. I hope it goes well."

"Okay well, thanks for the talk. Tell Kaito I said hi."

When I get into bed for the night, I text Akari,

"Doing well down here. I miss you. I will be back tomorrow after band. What are your plans?"

She quickly replies, "I miss you too. No plans."

"Okay cool. Looking forward to seeing you tomorrow evening."

She replies, "Yeah, me too. 😁"

—-

My mom is driving me up the hill to Yamaku. I can feel my heart pounding in my throat. I'm going to confess to Akari. That sentence would have sounded so strange to me a month ago…but now it is the most natural thing in the world to me. It's something I feel like I must do. These have certainly been an eventful few days.

My mom gets the wheelchair out for me after a struggle, and I get in.

She bends over and kisses me on the head, "Good luck sweetie. I'm cheering for you."

"Thanks, mom. For all your help with this."

I make my way up to my dorm room in my wheelchair. I don't know if Akari will be here already. But my question is quickly answered when I hear her door open.

She hugs me and says, "Hey, welcome back."

I hug her back more tightly than I normally do. Hugs with her are always nice. She smells good. Like lavender. Her hair is a little wet. She must have just showered. This contact only makes me want to confess to her more. I'm just going to get to the point.

When we break our hug I say, "Can you come in here with me? I have something I need to talk to you about."

She gets a concerned look on her face and then follows me into my room.

She closes the door behind her, and I invite her to sit on my bed in front of me. She still looks worried. I guess she doesn't have any idea what to expect. I think it's safe to say I'm about to surprise her.

I look her in the eyes and say, "This is…k-kind of big. And I just want to say, no matter how you respond to this, I still want us to be friends okay?"

Akari looks very worried now. "Y-you're really scaring me…but it would take a lot for us to stop being friends…"

I nod and try to psyche myself up. The worst-case scenario is that she is weirded out, and it will strain our friendship for a little while. I'll hurt but it'll pass, like with Hideki. The best-case scenario is that she…feels the same and wants to be with me. The likelihood of that second scenario is…low, but like my mom and Daisuke said…the risk isn't that high either. This is worth it.

"I…I…I…"

I'm so nervous I can't even form words. Just like when I'm around anyone else I like.

She puts a hand on my shoulder. I wonder what she thinks I'm about to say. There's no way she could guess.

"It's okay Kayoko, whatever it is t-take your time, okay?"

She makes me feel so much more comfortable. She always has, really. She's helped me in so many hard situations.

I take a deep breath and close my eyes, then I say, "I'm in love with you, Akari."

In a voice expressing her complete shock, she says, "Wh-what?!"

Not exactly the response I was hoping for. But just telling her has already made me feel a little better. We can just move past this now.

I open my eyes and see that she is on the verge of tears.

I say, "Hey, th-that's okay, Akari. Don't cry. I'm going to be okay. I knew this was a long shot."

"Y-you like girls!?"

Does she have to say it so incredulously?

I shrug, "You're the first one I've liked. But look, let's just…move past this. Things will be a little weird for a bit, but…I've kinda been through this before with Daisuke. So, I know we'll b-"

Akari leans forward and puts her lips on mine. My heart starts beating very fast. Kissing her is different than kissing a guy. She's gentler. Even more gentle than Hideki. Her skin and lips are so soft. And she smells so good. I can't believe this is happening, but it feels great. When she leans back to break the kiss, I see she has a few tears running down her face, but there's a big smile too. She holds my hand.

"I've…I've been in love with you for…quite a while, K-kayoko. Since your first morning here, I think. When I helped you after you fell…"

She hugged me and helped me avoid having a panic attack.

"I d-didn't know if that's what it was at first…but I figured it out when Hideki left. That is when I really knew. I hurt for you so much, and it was more than just normal empathy for a best friend. I was…r-really feeling your p-pain. I w-was willing to do anything to help you stop hurting. Th-that's when I knew…" She squeezes my hand. "I l-loved you."

She was amazing to me at the time, and I knew that she ached for me. She cried any time I did. But she's right…the amount it affected her…it wasn't that much less than it affected me. And we slept together a lot for awhile there. That whole time…she was in love with me. Sleeping next to me. That sounds so hard.

She continues as tears trickle slowly down her cheeks, "But I thought you c-couldn't feel the same…so I knew nothing could happen." She smiles really big and says, "I…I n-never thought this would happen, Kayoko."

This time I pull her to me and kiss her, a little longer this time. She puts her hands on my shoulders, while mine are around her back. These kisses have both been romantic and wonderful, but also tentative. Sort of exploratory. This is very new ground for us, and I think we are both taking it very slow. I realize I have to tell her something, so I break the kiss this time.

I put my hand on her cheek, and she puts her hand on top of mine. "You've really loved me for so long? That must have been really hard."

"It was s-sometimes. But you're my b-best friend. I knew you loved me and cared for me deeply, even if it wasn't exactly the same kind of love. We share everything with each other. We have a v-very deep bond. You've always been there for me. We've helped each other through so many things…so that was enough for me."

I have a few tears of my own now. That sounds so…painful.

"I don't know how you did that. I'm…so sorry. I've only been holding in for two days, and it was way too much for me. Did you have anyone to talk to about it? All that time?"

She nods, "Ai knows. No one else. She…thought I should tell you a while back but I was too s-scared. It was right after Hideki too… then I w-was with Michi…so…"

"Well…I'm glad you had someone to talk to about it with. I guess Ai will be happy about this?"

She laughs and says, "Probably."

I ask, "So you like girls? Because I am just as surprised as you were about me. I thought this was probably impossible too…I just had to tell you."

She smiles, "I have always been attracted to some girls. Before you, though just…celebrities and manga characters and stuff. No one I actually knew. You're the only g-girl I've had feelings for." She pauses for a moment and then smiles before saying, "Can we g-get in bed together?"

My heart jumps into my throat. This is all so new to me and I'm very nervous, even if a big part of me wants to do exactly that right now.

"I don't…know if I'm ready for that yet."

Akari's eyes get wide, and she giggles. "I didn't mean for that." She blushes. "Though…I think that would be pretty n-nice…sometime in the future. I'm d-definitely not ready for that yet either. But I just wanted to lay t-together. I've always liked laying with you…so it will be nice to do for the first time as" She smiles from ear to ear. "...your girlfriend."

I smile back, "That does sound really nice. Can you help me?"

She smiles at me and says, "Of course."

I move my wheelchair so it is parallel with the bed, and lower the arm rests. I lift myself up on my one good leg, and Akari helps me balance as I transition to the bed.

I scoot myself against the wall and lay on my back. It's really my only option with the way my leg is right now. Akari climbs into the bed next to me. She gets on her side and lays her head on the pillow and wraps her arms around my waist. I put my arm around her so it's over her shoulders and around her back. It feels so nice to be close with her like this. It always has. She has comforted me by snuggling with me many times. But now…it's a special kind of intimate.

She is smiling beautifully up at me when she asks, "When d-did you know?"

"Know what? …when I loved you?"

She nods.

"Well, I felt my feelings getting more intense lately. But like you said about your feelings…I didn't realize it was romantic love at first. But um…then, the other day..." I turn bright red.

Akari giggles. "S-seriously? Us being naked together is what did it, huh?"

I blush even redder. "Is that bad? I just…I noticed I was really attracted to you when I…saw you. Even when I was in pain. That was the missing piece I needed to figure it out. But…it wasn't just that. I've known you really care about me for a long time, but seeing how you took care of me really reinforced that. So, it was more than just the…naked part."

Akari scoots herself up a little and plants a soft kiss on my lips. "Well, I'm g-glad it was more than just liking how I looked. But I guess I am also glad you liked what you s-saw."

I smirk, "You're teasing me about this, but a minute ago you said you started to feel something my first morning here. Was I or was I not wearing only a towel when you helped me that day?"

Akari blushes, "You…were."

I laugh, "See, it's not so different."

"F-fine, you're right." She pauses. "Hey, this is why y-you didn't want me at your mom's isn't it?"

"Yeah. I had to talk to her about it all."

"So she knows?"

"She does. She told me to go for it. Compared us to her and my dad."

Akari smiles, "That's sweet. I'm g-glad she approves."

She adds. "Hey, c-can we sleep together tonight?" She giggles. "I um…m-mean that in the not sex way, again. I've always really liked falling asleep with you. But tonight will b-be a little different, I think." She smirks.

"Yeah. I'd like that a lot. I'll need to change." I sit up.

Akari says, "Do you want me to help you get undressed?"

I swallow so loud I think there was an audible 'gulp' sound.

"Yeah. Um…I guess it would be nice to not have to get up again with my leg like this. I'll just wear a T- shirt and some underwear. Y-you know where those are."

She nods and gets up and goes to my closet before coming back.

She grabs the bottom of my top and I put my arms up. She pulls it over my head. She smiles at me and doesn't shy away from looking at my body a little. It makes me feel really sexy. Part of me wants to throw my bra across the room, rip off her shirt and make out with her. But the more cautious part of me wins out.

I put on the shirt she gave me and take off my bra.

She helps pull off my pants and turns around when I take off my underwear and put on clean ones.

She gathers up the dirty clothes and puts them in my hamper.

She smiles and says, "I'll be right back."

I'm in bed waiting for my girlfriend - Akari - to come get in bed with me for the night. This should feel kind of insane. But…it really doesn't. It feels right. Like maybe we should have been like this for a long time.

She comes back wearing her bright pink pajamas and I smile at her.

She laughs, "I know, not quite as sexy as what you went with. B-but they are very comfy."

I laugh, "Is what I'm wearing really that sexy?"

She turns off the light and climbs under the covers with me.

"Um…yeah, d-definitely. You barely have anything on."

"Should I put on more?"

"No, no, no. I l-like it like this."

She wraps her arms around my lower ribs, tantalizingly close to the bottom of my breasts.

She sighs happily as she snuggles further into me. "Is this real? I k-kind of can't believe it is."

"It is hard for me to believe too. But…at the same time… natural."

She sits up a bit and puts a hand on the upper part of my ribs, under my collarbone. This time tantalizingly close to the top of my breasts. Is she doing this on purpose?

She kisses me on the lips again, this time a little more firmly. I wrap my arm around her and pull her a little closer. Then we break the kiss, she smiles at me, and we go back to cuddling.

"It feels r-right to me too. I love you, Kayoko. I n-never…thought I'd tell you those words. Not with this meaning…anyway. I'm really…so happy about this."

I grab her hand and lace my fingers with hers. My hand is so much bigger. This is my first time being with someone smaller than me, and she's a lot smaller. It's kind of nice.

"I love you too. See you in the morning."

I drift off to sleep happier than I've ever been, with my girlfriend, who also happens to be my best friend in the world, blissfully snuggled into my side.