"What the H…" Anna muttered, all these were wrong. First of all, this looks nothing like her house, more like some add about houses from the 80s so as everyone's dress and she was sure Summerween involves decorating as scary or paranormal stuffs like Halloween not some 80s fashion anniversary and secondly most alarming all she was pretty sure her father is not some dude named Ric Rabin Shaw 'Which is a very bland and cringy name by the way.' She thought who came in and her mother gave him a kiss on his cheek on his way out of the house as if he was her husband. Here, she was for some reason having breakfast with tea and a cupcake with Bro Ramirez on the other side of the table.
Bro Ramirez is the son of Soos Ramirez and Melody Ramirez, he was born during Mabel and Dipper's 4th summer in Gravity Falls which makes him significantly older than the Triplets, the Mystery Triplets saw Bro Ramirez as their cool older brother. He had her mother's hair color and his father's eyes and is quite muscular and bulky to the point that he rarely ever got bullied during his school years because other kids were intimidated by his appearance, yet he can be said to be a gentle giant. And to add more freakyness-
"AVA!?" Her jaw hit the floor in dismay. Her tallest sibling, Avalon Corduroy Pines, the same boorish sibling who once tried to tame a mongolian death worm as her pet, ate calamari from a slayed eldritch abomination, cackles like a hyena everytime she faces monsters with a brash attitude was wearing ballerina and instead of grinning savagely she was smiling like a plastic doll.
"Hi! I feel like a pretty princess! Wanna join in my dance?
"Uhhh….no thanks." Annable cringed so hard by hearing that sickeningly sweet tone from Ava she felt her neck steadily hard.
"Okay, see ya later!" Ava moved away dancing like a ballerina.
"Yeah, okay…." Immediately when Ava moved away, Anna decided to ask Bro once it was just her and Bro in the kitchen reaching the snapping point of freaking out "OKAY! I'm freaking out Bro, what in the 7 rings of hell is this!? Alternate reality? Temporal deviation? Hallucination? computer simulation!?" Anna shook Ramirez back and forth.
"Uh, what do you mean? Is something wrong?"
"Yes! Everything is wrong! Last I checked my father is Mason Pines, not that creepy vibing guy with a punchable irritable face called Ric Rabin Shaw!(which is a very cringy name now I say it outloud) and Ava is the LAST person to like or much less pursue ballerina or anything classy!"
"There's one way to find out what this farce is." Tyrone showed up with a disgruntled look feeling like a hooligan wearing outdated boy scout clothing
"Tyrone? Thank the Almighty I thought I was going insane!" Anna was relieved.
"Well, our family been through crazy stuffs so it's natural we would be doubtful of everything even in an unconscious level('I'm being paranoid' my ass aunt Mabel!')" The only male member of the triplets muttered as he began checking around, sniffling and yes even one time licking a wooden table which repulsed Bro and Anna.
"Hey guys I'm back! Wanna see the new ballerina technique?" Ava came back, her voice sounded like the screeching of a mirror in their ears with Tyrone hitting himself to the wall when he yelped.
Anna decided enough was enough "...Bro? Hold Ava still.
Ramirez then held Avalon up who then struggled like an animal "Ow! She bites!" he exclaimed.
"At least that hasn't changed about him." Ty gave his dry humor.
"Okay Ava, smell this." Anna got a ham from the kitchen and pointed it near Ava who smelled it.
Avalon's eyes began to react and her expression turned to that of confusion "Wha…wait why am I dressed as a ballerina?"
"Welcome back sis." Anna greeted.
"How did you know it would work dawg?" Bro asked as he left Ava who then snatched the ham while he scratched his head in puzzlement.
"Ava has an insatiable desire for ham." Ty answered his inquiry and gestured at Ava ripping at the ham savagely with her own teeth.
"Case in point. Everything here looked, taste and smell unusual and I feel like everything is too bright in color and Ava just regained her personality so this isn't an alternate reality, thus,"- Something in Ty's brain clicked "Aha! This is a simulation! Designed to keep us occupied until it tricks us into believing that it is reality but why I'm not certain how to break off of this." Tyrone touched his chin and hummed.
Ava took a bite and spoke as she chewed "There are three things that can solve anything; good communication, money and bombs." When the tallest triplet announced her philosophy with a gulp, then something in her mind clicked. "I'VE GOT AN IDEA!" She then grinned maniacally.
' I wonder if Ava reverting back to her old self is a good thing or a bad thing.' She was beginning to doubt if making his sister remember things was a good idea.
"WE HAVE TO BLOW EVERYTHING UP!" She said with manic glee.
' I stand corrected' Anna sights in her mind.
Tyrone who saw Annable's reaction interjected with a finger "No, no, she does have a point, this simulation has to look physically real to make us believe it is so, thus if we. could give the processors a hard time. It may be our way out by exploiting the programme's weakness and then tearing it down, only one way to find out." He punches Anna to everyone's shock.
"Agh what!' The shocked Anna nursed her cheek.
"TYRONE!" Bro blurted out in disapproval.
"Now hit me!"
"With pleasure!" Anna slapped him so hard he swing backed.
Then brief glitches seen across the virtual reality including things.
"See!? destructive activities on a continuous basis would give the simulation a hard time adjusting its processors!"
And so, everyone began wrecking the place with whatever they could find.
It was then when Wendy and the cringey named guy showed up seeing the house getting wrecked.
Ric's jaw fell seeing the whole place being wrecked from broken glasses to fallen furniture and oh there is fire on one of the window's closers.
"CHAOS REIGNS!" Ava cackled as she broke the antique TV with a bat.
"Whot the…what's going on here!?" Wendy demanded.
"This is for your own good mom." Recalling tales about how her mother and her real father were friends for years before falling in love with Aunt Mabel, Annable gave a zipping gesture around her lips.
Wendy then began thinking, the gears turned, the image of the zipping gesture led to more images and memories like an interconnected web and with an outraged look she gazed back at his 'supposed husband' "YOU! I KNOW YOU! You are that motherless freakazoid who once tried to switch bodies with my husband to get your dirty hands on me!" She points at him with condemnation.
"EWWW! That was why dad acted so weird back then!?" Anna gagged in disgust so as others recalled one time when her father acted oddly even for the Pines family's standard and acted like a flirtatious creep toward his wife.
"You know this bastardo Mrs. Pines?"
"First of all; please don't call me Mrs. Pines I feel old when I'm called that and second of all, YES! he tried to get his hands on me even when he found out I was married during that Peru trip!"
if I didn't know your husband was such a paranoiac that he would put anti-possession Sigils tattooed around his body we could have got together! And these brats showing up only made things complicated, I should have just got rid of them!" He was by now digging his own grave as he took Wendy's hand.
Wendy's reaction slowly built up, head shaken, veins appearing and slowly the volcano was building up until it became apocalyptic "Get your hands off me!" She punches him hard enough that he falls back in a surprised yelp.
While all this was happening, Ava put forks, spoons, cans and anything metallic she could find in a microwave snickering like an imp and then started the machine and moved away.
"Uh oh…" Bro said both from the explosive rage that was going to come from Mrs. Pines which got aptly nicknamed 'the Red Ragnarok' by her children and the microwave threatening to explode as he with the other young Corduroy-Pines slowly backway from the incoming literal and metaphorical boom.
"NO MEANS NO YOU SHAMELESS WRETCHED PIG! I WILL NEVER EVEN SHARE THE SAME ROOM WITH A INCEL-STALKING CREEP LIKE YOU EVEN IF WE WERE THE LAST HUMANS ON THE PLANET OR HAD TO SPENT 40 YEARS IN A POST-APOCALYPSE ALTERNATE EARTH! PUT THAT IN YOUR DENSED-THICK-SKULL YOU F- !"
BOOM!
The microwave exploded, the simulation couldn't take it any more and the processors burned, smoking burnt circuitry. Everyone woke up seeing these electronic cans' connected by cables to a container box where Dipper, Mabel and Amon were busy working on a console till they saw everyone waking up and then putting the helmets away.
"Wendy, Ava, Anna and Tyrone! Are you all alright?" Dipper came in with others checking on his wife.
"I'm fine dude, just may have developed blood pressure." Wendy shook his worry and hugged him.
"yeah , yeah we're good dad." Ava replied as she was checked by Aunt Mabel.
"We came here trying to disconnect you from the simulation, but you managed to do it." their aunt informed them.
Ty began trying to "Ah that, we simply just-"
"BLOW EVERYTHING UP!" Ava interrupted him in glee, making him sight.
"You WHAT!?" Mason squawked.
Mabel on the other hand was laughing "That's Pines ingenuity for ya!"
"But…how did you know the stimulation wouldn't kill you all as it tried to duplicate the real effects of an explosion on the human body?" Amon puzzled.
The triplets now look at each other awkwardly "….we didn't." Fortunately for them, they were saved by the awkward revelation.
Cleak
Rabin mistakenly stumped a small branch of wood which made a sound upon impact causing everyone to gaze at him as he felt like a deer being glanced at by a pack of wolves.
Everyone's look was positively murderous; Wendy was growling with narrowed eyes intent on massacre with extreme prejudice, Anne readied his knuckles, Dipper with thunderous eyebrows looking in cold condemnation that was apocalyptic, Mabel was hitting both of her hands to each other one open and the other fisted repeatedly and then gave a knack on her neck with a shake, Avalon was snarling with rage like a wolf, Tyrone activated his taser from his advanced backpack from a robotic arm that came from it with a cold glance, Anna was foaming in depthless hate and Amon readied his wrench which he got from on a machinery. Even Bro Ramirez was giving a grime left and right shake of head which signified 'You done goofed.'
"Guys! Cheating in life is a talent you know!" He gave a nervous smile which did not improve his situation at all, they menacingly came near him as he tried to run but he was surrounded, anywhere he glanced he met the murderous gaze.
"Y-you can't do this! Your morality won't let you! You are all better than this!" He tried to reach their better nature.
"Let me think…ah nah." Wendy with that finality kicks him between his legs who gasped in pain so great he nearly dropped on his knee and then throw him toward his husband who then punch him with a knuckle so hard that teeths fell and his nose got broken so as his glass with it's broken glasses falling which toss him to Mabel who headbutted him, before he could cry he got tasered by Tyrone and then got a kicked on the stomach by Anna and Avalon with a fist and a kick respectively at the same time, Amon swinging his wrench uppercut to his chin making his face go up from the impact and from there everyone began punching and kicking him as he got tossed like a volleyball till he fell on the ground.
Everyone then continued brutalizing Ric Rabin Shaw for minutes until he was a wrecked bloodied mess on the ground breathing shakily.
Dipper spit on his face and Wendy again kicked him between the legs leaving him as he agonized and stayed on the dirty mud sniveling pathetically as the rain came down.
"Pony god." Avalon snorted.
"Can't believe I nearly fell for that guy!" Wendy gagged.
"I'm calling the police." Mason turned his phone.
Just then, a demon that was used to power inside the chamber looked like a cross between an hexagram and a bat with 4 eyes.
"Yes! I'm free! Oh thank you flesh bags for freeing me from being used as a glorified battery!….so instead of a soul in our dealing I gave you a discount which is all I ask is your happiness for ultimate power like maybe your marriage or one of your kids-"
"HARD/HECK NO!" Dipper and Wendy shouted while the former grabbed a blessed weapon from his belt ready to plunge it.
"Wait I can- !"
"GO TO HELL!" Both Wendy and Dipper held the blessed blade and then shoved it right at the demon's chest.
"YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH- !"
The demon screamed until he poofed into ashes.
"I . frakking. hate dealmaking demons." Mason snarled in depthless loathing, his experience with Bill made him despise them to the point that he had a policy of 'Shot on sight' every time he saw one, hence why he has an armory of anti-demonic weaponaries.
While the triplets were awe-inspired by their father's uncompromising morality and hatred for all demonkind, Ric tried crawling away, he got his hands on a memory gun which he stole from the Mcgucket Mansion that was eating dust and then tried shooting that on the gang, unfortunately for him the gun is old, out of juice and rusted so instead it just created sparkling electricity which draw their attention on him again.
"Oopse." Oops indeed, the gang were now staring holes at Shaw.
"...let's brutalize him again." Wendy commented.
"Yeah." Dipper agreed.
"Yes." Anna concur.
"Oh dawg, I'm going to get my Mexican weapons." Bro went to get his Mexican weapons.
"I'm going to bring my super taser." Tyrone now calibrated his taser
"Dibs on his legs for me to break!" Ava gave a wolfish grin.
"Awo." Mabel whined that her niece got to do that.
"NONONO!"
From outside, the sound of the cries of a pathetic man with his punchable face getting beaten could be heard.
"THIS IS FOR POSSING MY BODY AND TRIED TO DESTROY ALL MY RELATIONSHIPS!" Dipper roared.
"YAHOO!"
"THIS IS FOR TRYING TO GET ON BED WITH ME!" Wendy raged.
"UGGGH! NOT THE GROIN AGAIN!"
"THIS IS FOR MY FRIENDS!" Bro declared.
"GAAH! WHY IS IT SO SPICY!?"
"THIS IS BECAUSE I DESPISE CHARACTER ASSASSINATION!" Tyrone announced.
"What do you even- WEWEWE GJOKAJ- !"
"THIS IS BECAUSE I ENJOY YOUR SUFFERING!" Annable channeled her inner Ava.
"AAAAAH! YOU BROKE ME! AAAH!"
"MERRY SUMMERWEEN JERKWAD, HAHAHAHAHA!" Avalon cackles maniacally.
Ric Rabin Shaw's cries of agony have become legendary thanks to how loud it was that everyone from 5 meters away could hear it and a whole new folklore was made about the 'the screaming man' in Gravity Falls.
And thus, that was the day Gideon and Robbie felt a sudden chill, they don't know why but somehow they got the feeling if they stalked and creeped on their ex-love interests in later years they would be less forgiving than when they were young. Also, maybe their experiences with their harassments made them very vindictive.
Notes:
This is how I imagined the triplets to look like when they were 12.
Avalon's appearance:
https/learoodle-blog/155785014703/yep-i-finished-gravity-falls-i-cant-accept-it?source=share
Tyrone's appearance:
https/p/CFHKFPMhBrL/?igshid=MzRlODBiNWFlZA=
Annable's appearance:
https/moringmark./post/50251866215