Chapter 2

Matt was working out his frustration on a speed bag when he heard Maggie's footsteps on approach. He had heard Fogwell on the phone with her a little while ago. Fogwell had warned him that he wouldn't lie and say that he wasn't here. Still didn't mean he was ready for this. As she got closer, Matt ducked into the locker room. She couldn't pull him out of there...at least not easily.

Maggie opened the gym door and started scanning the room. She didn't see Matthew anywhere. "You told me he was here," she stated boldly as she interrupted Fogwell as he was working with someone.

"Definitely not as shy as you used to be," Fogwell laughed as he climbed out of the ring. "Rocco, where'd Matty go?"

The other man pointed a thumb towards the locker room. "He probably went to use the can."

"Will you kindly fetch him? It's time for him to come home," Maggie requested.

"Now, just hold up a minute. You and Matty need to have a long conversation before he goes anywhere," Fogwell stopped her.

"This is not the time or place," Maggie responded.

"It's not up to you now. Matty knows and he has questions that only you can answer. He's angry and he's hurt."

"And you know so much more about him than I do?"

"Maggie, with all due respect, I've been around him longer and right now, I see a boy that I care about wanting what I can't give him. All I can do is give him a safe place to vent his anger until he gets the answers he needs," Fogwell said calmly.

"You call boxing a safe place?"

"In comparison to beating the shit out of some smart-ass neighborhood kids...yes," Fogwell countered. "And yes, I've heard about some of his fights and seen some of the evidence. In here, he's unloading on a heavy bag instead of some kid's face. If he's itching for a fight, anyone of the guys here will gladly spar with him. They'll let him unload on them and they'll make sure he doesn't get hurt. They'll teach him to defend himself even though from what I've seen, he isn't lacking in that. You want to talk to Matty. You'll be glad I took the edge off of him. You may not have known Jack's ugly side but I sure did and that boy walked in here looking like Jack before he unleashed the devil on someone."

"Fogwell, I want to see my son now," Maggie ground out.

"First time I've ever heard you say that," Fogwell muttered as he walked towards the locker room. "Hey Matty! You back here?"

"I'm here," Matt called back as he washed his hands.

"Com'ere kiddo. Come sit next to me," Fogwell asked as he patted the bench.

Matt sat down as he was asked. "She's here, isn't she?"

"Yeah, she is," Fogwell confirmed as he wrapped his arm around Matt's thin shoulders. "I think I pissed her off real good too."

"Should I be thanking you for that?" Matt asked sarcastically.

"Well, maybe if she's pissed off at me, she'll be less pissed at you for running off," Fogwell laughed. "But, in all seriousness, she's here and if you want to talk, now's your chance. I'm in your corner, kid. You want privacy, my office is yours. You want me with you, I'm there."

"Can I have a minute first?" Matt asked.

Fogwell gave Matt a hug before standing up. "Sure thing, kiddo."

Maggie was about ready to spit nails when Fogwell returned. "Where is he?"

"He'll be right out."

No sooner the words left Fogwell's mouth, Matt had appeared from behind him. Even with his glasses on, you could see the cold, dead stare he had hardened his face into.

"Matthew, let's go. We're leaving," Maggie said coarsely.

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"I'm not leaving," Matt reiterated coldly as he crossed his arms. "Not until I get some answers, Mom." There was ice and venom behind that last word.

All the color drained from Maggie's face when she heard 'Mom' come out of Matthew's mouth. She forced herself to maintain her composure. "We will discuss this later. Let's go," she said once more as she tried to grab Matt's arm.

Matt pulled his arm out of her grasp and stepped back. "No. Here. Now. We go back to St. Agnes and you'll just brush this aside like you have for thirteen years. You've had everyone lie for you. I want the truth."

Maggie sighed, that stubborn streak would be the death of her. "Is there somewhere we can sit and talk?"

"You can use my office," Fogwell offered as he opened the door. "Matty, you want me to stay?"

Matt nodded as he sat down in Fogwell's chair. "We may need a ref."

The two adults sat down facing Matt. "Where do you want to start?" Maggie asked.

"Why did you leave?" Matt asked bluntly.

Maggie swallowed hard and her heart started pounding. He wasn't beating around the bush. "I was sick and I needed help."

"You could've stayed and Dad could've helped."

"Your father was doing all he could to take care of you and me. I needed help he couldn't provide."

"I don't understand. Explain it to me. He loved you. Why couldn't he help?"

"I was suffering from a severe form of depression after having you. Between that and the guilt I was feeling from leaving the church behind for your father and not being a good wife and mother, I fell into a deep, dark place. In that darkness, I considered hurting myself and I tried to hurt you. I couldn't be left alone with you because I would ignore you when you were crying."

Matt looked confused for a moment as he processed what Maggie had said. "So this was my fault? This happened because you had me?"

"No, this was no way your fault," Maggie was quick to answer. "It was always there. It was just the wrong set of dominoes that went off."

"Did you get better?" Matt asked.

"Yes...over time and with treatment."

"Why didn't you come back?"

"I thought you and your father were better off without me. I was afraid of going back into that dark place. I couldn't be a wife and mother then. I had taken my vows."

"Did you ever talk to him about it? I'm pretty sure he would have said otherwise," Matt asked.

"I talked to him more often than you think," Maggie admitted. "Sometimes, he'd leave me messages and sometimes we got to talk in person. He'd always talk about you."

"You were in the hospital after my accident," Matt pointed out.

"I was. Your father had told me what happened."

"Where were you when he died?" Matt asked with that hint of venom in his voice then.

"Your father had called me before the Creel fight. He told me what he was going to do and how you would need me afterwards. I never got to call him back."

"You used to come sit with me when I had nightmares and then suddenly you stopped. Why?"

Maggie cringed as Matthew brought that up. He was good at putting the knife in and twisting it at her every failure to him. "There was another child who was ill that needed my attention that night, Matthew. What more do you want of me?"

"I wanted my mom!" Matt yelled as he burst into tears. "It's what I've always wanted! I just wanted my mom. Why did I have to wait thirteen years? You weren't far away!"

Maggie's heart broke as Matt hid his face as he cried.

Fogwell got up from his chair and gathered Matt into his arms, shielding him and trying to give him comfort.

Maggie was disgusted with herself. So many had kept this secret for so long. How could it not blow up in her face? There's so much to make up for. "How do I fix this? What do I have to do?"

Matt muttered something that she didn't understand but it was something that made him cry harder.

Fogwell held him tighter, glaring in Maggie's direction to remind her that this was her fault.

Slowly Matt stopped crying as hard as he was. Fogwell was rubbing his back and not letting go of the poor boy as he calmed down. "Matty, why don't you go in the locker room and get yourself some water? I'll be in to get ya in just a bit."

Matt lifted his head and wiped his face with his hands before walking out the door.

Once Matt was out the door, Fogwell turned on Maggie. Pissed off didn't begin to describe how he felt. "What he said is that you have to try but I'm going to add to that. You have to try to be his mother and that's something you have never done. Jack was the only parent he ever knew and a whole bunch of people willing to help. You've had people he trusted lie to him his entire life to shield you from the consequences of your actions. Now, that's blown up in your face and unraveled everything. You don't quick fix that. It will take time and hard work. Being a parent means sacrifice for your child. Jack got that. He didn't eat sometimes just to make sure Matty had enough. It's your turn to put in the work. Now, I'm taking Matty with me tonight. My wife and I will make sure he has two good meals in him, a warm bed and gets to school on time. Tomorrow afternoon is on him. Now, excuse me. Good night."