Chapter 31: Operation "The Butler Did It"
{R}
Changed into his blue jeans, white sweater and black blazer, he met Mishima at Central Street before joining Ryuji at his apartment complex, grateful the two had the foresight to change into casual clothes...even if it wasn't much of a disguise, not that his was any better, but still.
"So we're really gonna do this, huh? Are you sure this is going to be okay?"
No, he wasn't sure. But Ren didn't want to say that. Instead he said,
"I'll make sure it will be."
Because, even if he wasn't necessarily the "leader" in this situation, a leader should keep their comrades safe...
"Yeah! That's the spirit! Operation Maidwatch, bro!"
"Y-Yeah! Operation Maidwatch!"
"Shh!"
...starting with being inconspicuous.
"Oh come on, we weren't that loud."
"Nothing wrong with being careful. We don't know how bad it could get if it is suspicious."
"Eh, it'll be fine. If it turns out to be sketchy, we can just bail."
"What a genius plan," he said, flat.
Ryuji took it seriously though. "Yeah yeah I know."
Mishima was more blunt. "To think...Sakamoto has a brain."
That Ryuji took offense to. "Hey, I ain't that dumb."
"Uh huh. Sure. Now who's going to call?" Ren said, wanting this done with already.
Ryuji hummed in thought, turning to Mishima.
Mishima hummed in thought, turning to Ryuji.
Both eyed him.
Oh no.
"What?" he said, feigning ignorance.
It was useless.
"Okay give 'em a call!"
Ren groaned. "Why me? It was your idea."
"W-Well, you guys keep sayin' I'm bad with my words, right? But you aren't. So you should do it!"
"I-I'm not good with words either," Mishima was quick to say.
Had it been any other time, Ren would've called bull on both, but the tremble in Mishima's voice belied his jitters so Ren knew he had a high chance of messing up and Ryuji ironically used their previous teasing as a good point.
So Ren heaved a sigh and said,
"Fine. I'll do it." He pulled out his phone. "But I'm putting it on speaker so that you can see how I do it and can do it yourself if you want to do it again."
He wished Aki was here though. She could pull of a different voice much better than him. But, alas, she wasn't, so he dialed the number. It wasn't long before the line answered.
"Thank you for calling! This is Victoria's Housekeeping!"
"They answered!" Mishima said.
Thankfully Ryuji had the sense to say, "Shh!" so Ren tuned them out to focus on his phone.
"I take it you're interested in our services then?"
As deep as he could, he said, "Yes."
"Is there anyone in particular you'd like to request?"
"No preference. "
"Very well! Let's see here... We have a maid available in...twenty minutes. May I ask for your address?"
With that, he gave the address they were currently at and the person cut off the line.
"Shit... This is really happening..."
"A maid's 'services'..."
Ren rolled his eyes before sliding against the wall on his way to take a seat before popping up the Light the Fire app and reading his newest book.
Or rather, he tried to.
"Hey...what should we have her do? "
"I don't know... Any ideas?"
"I was thinking we should start with some cooking... Of course I wouldn't mind some of the other services either..."
"Maybe cleanin' this place up then?"
"Hmm... maybe we should we hold a strategy meeting to discuss?"
"Uh...well...they said twenty minutes, right? Ugh, I gotta use the bathroom..."
Before either of them could reply, the faux-blond left for the bathroom. Ren sighed in irritation. He just couldn't focus on his book and ignore the noise this time. So he said,
"What is there to discuss?"
"W-Well...mainly what we're going to have her do...?"
He sighed again. "Whatever we feel like when she does get here," he said. Then he glared. "Within reason of course, right?"
He would not tolerate any harrassment, unintentional or not, from either of them. Even if the maid turned out to be horrible. That didn't mean they had to be jerks as well.
Mishima tensed and said, "R-Right Boss!"
A third sigh accompanied with a head thud on the wall. "Don't call me 'Boss'. If you have to call me something that's not my name, use 'Leader'."
"Right Leader!"
"Now can you please be quiet?" he said, lessening his annoyance in his tone. "I'd like to read while waiting for her to come here."
And he returned to his phone...for about one minute.
"Wow... You're actually calm about this? That's so cool... How do you do it?"
He frowned, confused. "Why wouldn't I be calm?"
"Wait...so you're not using some trick to keep yourself calm?"
Now he frowned out of irritation. "No." Though it's definitely getting more tempting to use Dr. Maruki's techniques right now...
Mishima stared as his mouth dropped. "Woah, really? Amazing..."
Ren...wasn't sure how to take that. He was just being himself right now. As such, once again, he said,
"So can you stay quiet now? I'd really like to get back to reading."
Especially since all the noises around him were getting to him easily at the moment.
"Oh right! Sorry..."
Finally he was able to relax, getting caught up in the story he found himself in. But he knew it would come to an end the moment Ryuji returned after a rather long time later and Mishima said,
"I-it's almost time... You were in there for a while...you okay? Hey, did you wash your hands?"
Ren sighed for the fourth time before putting away his phone as Ryuji said,
"... Huh? What? Who? Me?"
"Y-You're really nervous..." Mishima said. He laughed but it was clear he was just as nervous.
"It'll be fine, you two," he said in hopes of calming them, mainly Mishima though. "As long as the maid isn't bad, then I doubt we'll be in trouble."
That, however, did the opposite effect as Mishima froze and then said, "Are high school students even allowed to use this type of service?!"
"Huh?" Ryuji said, utterly confused.
He said, "Technically yes."
"What do you mean 'technically yes'?! You should've researched it! What if they find out who we are?!"
Ren's annoyance surged and he glared as he said, "You're the one who wanted to do this for intel! You're the one who should've researched! I'm just here to make sure you're safe!"
Mishima flinched at his tirade but still stood strong as he said,
"Well you're doing a terrible job at that! We'll be screwed if your number had shown up on their caller ID!"
"You two insisted we do it tonight so excuse me for not getting the chance to prepare properly!"
"We could've got a burner phone nearby!"
He flinched at the point but he was so done with this that he said,
"Would you have let me go to do that, you hyperactive per—"
"What the the hell you two shoutin' about?! Why would how old you are matter when it comes to housekeeping?!"
They froze, then turned to Ryuji.
The faux-blond grew confused and glanced between him and Mishima.
"What?"
"What you mean 'what'? You really don't get why we'd be in trouble for calling a 'maid service'?"
The faux-blond scratched his head. "Uh, yeah, that's what I said. I mean, they're just maids."
Well...his respect for Ryuji raised back up now. But now that the anger dissipated, Ren grimaced at their argument earlier. Not only had he let his frustration over this whole event get to him, he had just almost insulted his friend. Some "leader" he was...
"Hey, uh...Mishima?" he said. "I'm sorry... You're right. If I wanted to keep us safe, I should've looked more into this before meeting you guys."
"U-Uh, no way! I'm the one who should be sorry. I should've been the one to research. I'm the best at getting intel online out of all of us..."
Ren opened his mouth to apologize further and insist his responsibility, but then stopped and chuckled, realizing they would continue to blame themselves in a loop.
"What the? What's so funny?"
"Nothing, nothing. Just realized we'd endlessly say sorry at this rate."
Mishima was still for a moment before he laughed as well. "Ha ha...yeah, that is pretty funny."
Ding dong.
They stilled.
"Good evening...I'm from the house keeping service."
Then they sprung.
"What?! Already?! She's five minutes early!" Mishima said. "What do we do?! I'm not mentally prepared!"
Either she was very eager...or very industrious. But no matter the reason, he said, "Calm down! We just need to—"
"Oh, the door's unlocked...? May I come in...?"
"I can't do this! My stomach's actin up and my hands are sweaty! So you handle the rest!"
Ren stared. "What?! Hey wait!"
He tried to grab onto the faux-blond, but he was still a former athlete and thus he slipped from his grasp, escaping to the balcony.
"You handle the rest! Don't let her find out you're a high school student!"
Ren was struck with more bewilderment as Mishima said,
"W-Wait! I can't do this either!"
And followed after Ryuji, closing the sliding door behind him.
"Wait a second you—"
He was going to chase after them but at that point the feminine voice said,
"Excuse me...oh, there you are!"
And he had no choice but to halt his steps, gritting his teeth at the whole situation.
Traitors!
"Welcome home master!" the maid said. "I'm going to fill your tired heart full of lovely energy! Meow!" There was a brief pause, likely from curtseying. "I'm Becky and I have the pleasure of serving you today."
He could just hear the heart symbol at the end of her sentence. But as hurt as he was over Ryuji and Mishima just...leaving him to do their idea, this was somebody working on her job. It would be rude of him to not at least have her do something before he told her to go—after paying of course—unlike the rudeness of certain someones.
So he played along for now, sighing in defeat before he said, "Nice to me-ow-t you."
It worked as the maid behind him said, "We're going to get along so well! Meooooooow!"
He couldn't help but smile at her accepting the pun. But just as he was about to turn around, she went on to explain her services to him, all of which he expected—both the innocent and the implied ones—and...he stilled. Her voice... It seemed familiar. He wasn't sure where exactly he heard it until she grew curious, came closer and said,
"Hmm? You look young Master... are you perhaps...in high school?"
His breath caught.
No way. That was Ms. Kawakami.
Shit shit shit shit shit.
Ren gulped, focusing on his breathing to ignore his racing heart, sweating brow and trembling hands.
Change of plans, he definitely had to make sure she didn't see his face. She would recognize it in a heartbeat.
"Master...?"
Oh crap he forgot to answer.
"I'm a dad," he said first thought.
A pin drop could be heard that moment.
"Milord, I do realize that is a deep wish of yours for the future, but you do recall there is such a thing as a 'teenage father', yes?" Arsène oh so helpfully pointed out.
Yeah thank you very much for reminding me.
"You are welcome."
Ren would've given an unamused look if it weren't for the fact his smug Persona was within his mind and soul.
That and that "Becky" was still here.
"Wow! Your skin's so healthy!" she said, so cheerful. But it clear she wasn't convinced when she added, "You're not lying to me are you...?"
Still it seemed she didn't notice who he was yet. He could still turn this around. If she had any shred of human decency, she'd balk at the idea of "serving" a minor, whether because of the age difference being disgusting or degrading to her, so he nodded, sharp and obvious so she could tell.
And, to the mercy of his heart, it did the trick.
"Hmm, I think I'll wait to provide those other services until you've matueed a bit. So...I'll be going now."
He sighed a breath of relief.
Or rather, he would've.
"W-What?! No!"
"Quiet...!"
Wait, they were still here watching?! You traitors!
"Is someone there?!"
"Oh no!"
"Shit, run Mishima!"
Crashing and shouting could be heard as "Becky" went up to the balcony door.
"Mishima? Sakamoto-kun?!"
Of course Ryuji would blow their identities...
"And you...?!"
Ren smiled in resignation and held his hands up in surrender.
"Caught me red handed," he said. "Ms. Kawakami."
The maid froze, eyes wide, before she put on a fake smile and said,
"Oh I'm sorry, I think you got me for the wrong person. This is our first meeeting. Yes, the first time ever, Master."
Ren almost wished a tumbleweed would pass by, paired with a loud woosh of wind, but sadly this wasn't a Western cartoon.
The woman groaned. "This is unbelievable..." she said. "Yes it's me... your homeroom teacher..."
He couldn't help but chuckle. "Now we're even," he said, now that they knew each other's identity.
Ms. Kawakami seemed to mumble something before she suddenly glared at him.
He jerked at the sudden intensity as she said,
"Who did you hear this from? Oh, it's Ms. Chouno, isn't it? That harpy...!"
Ren frowned as all good humor left him, worry taking its place.
"It was Ryuji actually. He found a flyer by chance," he said.
Yes it was ratting him out but she knew he was a part of this already anyway. Plus he was still sore about him and Mishima abandoning him, not to mention watching him without helping. More importantly however...
"But why would you assume her?"
Ms. Kawakami seemed to have realized she let something she didn't want to slip pass her lips, but much like him, it was too late, so she explained.
"She's been snooping on all the other teachers since the incident with Mr. Kamoshida."
Ah... That made sense, though a part of him was surprised. He hadn't thought any of the teachers would do that, wanting to scrutinize potential threats to the students. Then again, now that he thought about it, it could just be because the school's reputation was ruined and they wouldn't want another scandal. He was pulled from his thoughts as Ms. Kawakami said,
"Are you going to tell her about this?"
Ren frowned and tilted his head. "Why would I?"
"Don't joke with me."
"I'm not." He paused. "This time anyway."
Understandably, Ms. Kawakami grew more suspicious, and dare he say desperate.
"Then if you're going to side with a teacher, side with me. I'm in charge of your class after all. And if you promise not to tell, I'll do anything for you!" she said.
He gave her a flat look and leaned forward.
"Really? Anything?"
Because he doubted she would literally do anything, not that he would've taken it "far" anyway. There would be only one reason he would wish for her services.
To his surprise she glowered and snapped.
"Hey, it won't be better for you if people find out you called a maid service."
"I still blame Ryuji for that."
"What? So you're saying it was also his idea to use this address?"
He nodded.
She turned shocked.
Ren didn't blame her. It was easy to forget Ryuji was simply reckless, not legitimately stupid.
"Still...you found out about this and I found out about you. So if you promise to keep this a secret...I'll forget this ever happened, okay?"
Well, if he was honest, Ren wished he could just keep it secret simply because he wanted to, without a deal in place. But with the deal, he could guarentee not only his safety, but also reassure Ms. Kawakami he would stay his tongue. So he nodded and said, to show he was serious,
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
Though perhaps he should've been more straight forward since she gave him quite a dubious look at his response.
"Okay then... I'll treat this as if you cancelled so you won't have to pay anything. Okay?"
Oh. He gave a slight bow and said, "Thank you." Though... "Are you sure? I don't mind paying. I've bothered you after all."
She just had the misfortune of being dragged into this after all.
"Oh no no no! It's fine! I'll just leave now!"
And she did, bewildered as she left with speed and said one final thing.
"Don't say anything about this at school! Pretend it never happened!"
With that, she was gone. It was just him, all by his lonesome, in an empty apartment room in an apartment complex.
Ren hung his head and groaned.
Now he could go home...
(A)
Akira had changed into her bed clothes when her brother's steps echoed on the stairs.
"Oh hey Big...Bro...?" she said, cheerful before trailing off.
Ren flopped onto his futon. She had left it out for him in case he was tired and she was glad she had been prepared. But still, that look on his face and that he went straight for it...
"Uh...Big Bro? Don't you wanna change?"
Nothing.
"Big Bro?"
She knelt by him and poked his shoulder. He grumbled but did not stir.
"He fell asleep?"
Indeed he did as he rolled onto his side, grumbling a little before his breathing resettled.
Akira stared.
What in the world happened?
Oh well. Whatever happened, she would have to help her brother get comfortable without waking him.
She would have to ask tomorrow.
{R}
Ren groaned, glad his sister had been satisfied with him after spending their time en route to school interrogating him about last night. Simply put, he had told her that Ryuji and Mishima had been a gigantic headache over a mistake they made and he had to clean up their mess, hence his exhaustion. Oh it was clear she knew he was holding out on her, but still, she was satisfied and that was enough for him.
He would've also put that event out of his mind after that but...Ms. Kawakami's mention of Ms. Chouno hounding the other teachers worried him. Though his homeroom teacher wasn't exactly the most attentive or particularly kind to him, whatever her reason to moonlight as a maid, he doubted it was because she wanted to, if how annoyed she was about her job and how hesitant over doing "anything" were any clues.
So when classes were over, he left in search for her. He was glad he did because he found her in the middle of being interrogated by the very teacher he had worried about.
"Um, I have another matter to attend to, so I'll excuse myself..."
"No! We're not finished talking yet!"
"But I..."
"There have been a series of scandals on campus. We're all being called into questioning. And yet you leave earlier than anyone and barely make it to the faculty meetings! Explain yourself! Don't tell me you've been running around at night!"
Time to step in.
"Excuse me? Ms. Kawakami?"
"Huh?"
"Amamiya-kun?"
"I have another question," he said, walking up to his homeroom teacher.
"Another question?" Ms. Chouno said.
He nodded. "Yes. I ask Ms. Kawakami for help a lot." He glanced at her, hoping she would play along.
Thankfully she did. "O-Oh, Amamiya-kun's questions are complicated so I take time at night to explain to him."
"Oh... So you're giving individual lessons outside of school hours, hmm?" She eyed them with a critical gaze.
Ren was about to say more to convince her. But then she abruptly smiled and said,
"What passion! You are the ideal teacher! A passionate teacher is exactly what we need in this school. I'm sorry for suspecting you."
Why was he suddenly reminded of Yusuke...?
She gave a satisfied nod. "Well then, keep up the hard work you two."
And then she left, just like that.
"She just kind of convinced herself..." Ms. Kawakami said, watching the English teacher's retreat.
Yup. Like Yusuke. Except eccentric over teaching. That, well, wasn't the worst thing in the world, especially if it meant convincing her with little effort, but still, her views on teaching were both a relief and a concern.
"What was that?" Ms. Kawakami said, glowering at him.
He wasn't sure why. "What was what?"
"Why were you covering for me?"
Oh. That... It was like Ann all over again. So of course his answer was the same.
"I was worried you'd be in trouble and you were, so I helped."
"Wha—ugh...really now..." Ms. Kawakami messaged her temple and sighed.
"Do you need aspirin?"
She wasn't amused by this for some reason so he quickly said,
"You look like you have a headache. And I have some in my bag and a spare bottle so I wanted to offer."
Ms. Kawakami eyed him for a few moments before moving on to their surroundings.
"Could you come with me for a bit?"
He nodded and they went to a more secluded spot where not many students passed. They weren't exactly behind cover, but it was close and his teacher chose it, so it would have to do.
"Thanks for the help, really, but I can't talk about this at school..." she said, keeping an eye out.
"Well, yes, I understand, but what is it that you—"
He couldn't get much else out as Ms. Kawakami handed him a strip of paper with words and numbers, saying,
"This is the address and phone number of my night job. Call at night and request me. Just be careful it doesn't show up in your call history, okay?"
Then she left just a suddenly as Ms. Chouno did, leaving him staring at the paper.
"I really just wanted to make sure she was all right..."
"Hey, look on the bright side," Mona said as he poked out of Ren's bag. "She now owes us another favor. Maybe we can negotiate with her to help us."
Well Ren didn't like that. It was almost close to blackmailing, but...there was a service that Ms. Kawakami did that he wanted. It would be a major boon to Aki if he got it.
"Okay. I'll call her tonight then."
"Wait tonight? Really?"
He glanced over his shoulder. "The sooner the better."
"If you say so... It will certainly help corroborate her 'helping' you with private tutor lessons."
Tutor lessons...
An idea sprang to mind.
He smirked and chuckled.
"Uh, Ren...? What's with the evil laugh...?"
"Oh nothing," he said as he pushed up his fake glasses. "It just occured to me that I need to give some lessons."
(A)
Akira had been hoping to tell Akechi she had free time once again, if only because he really should experience video games, especially at an arcade, but not long after she stepped out of her classroom, Ryuji was right there waiting for her.
"Hey Akira. Wanna hang out? Maybe even train?" he said, looking a bit more tired than usual.
"Is it 'cause of yesterday?"
The faux-blond tensed. "Uh, well, uh..."
To the boy's luck, he was saved from answering as a blonde haired panther barreled into her.
"Akira! I need your help!" Ann said, grabbing on her arm.
"Hey hey! Watch it! That could've hurt if you're not careful!" she said.
"Help with what?"
At that point, the natural blonde noticed him.
"Oh! Ryuji. I didn't see you there."
"What's with that tone?! It was obvious I was here!"
She laughed sheepishly but otherwise ignored him to lean into her ear and whispered,
"I want to know some embarrassing stories of Ren."
Oh...?
Well if that was the case...well, she wouldn't refuse the opportunity, and she hadn't really hung out with Ann since they met. She would have to put off her arcade meet with Akechi for later. Oh and training with Ryuji too.
She whispered back. "Your wish is my command." Then to Ryuji, she said, "Sorry, but I gotta help Ann with this. Maybe next time."
The boy grumbled. "Then how about I tag along? Maybe I can help? Oh! Maybe we could all train together and—"
"Ah! There you are!" an unexpected voice said.
They startled and turned to Ren...who suspiciously had his "Joker smile" on, the one that was like a predator closing in on his prey.
"Hey Big Bro. What're you doin' here?"
"Why, to get Ryuji of course," he said in his showman tone. "After all, I had promised to assist with his homework."
If Ren wasn't suspicious before, he certainly was now with the way he was speaking.
"Huh...?" Ryuji said, confused, but with a tinge of nervousness in it. "I didn't—"
"Come now. We mustn't be late. We can't have Mishima waiting. That would be much too discourteous."
"Wait, Mishima?! Dude, what're you—ack! Hey!"
Akira and Ann stared Ren locked his arm with Ryuji's and dragged him. Of course the faux-blond tried to resist—"Hey stop that man!"—and even called out to them—"Guys! Please! Help!"—almost like a convict being dragged to his execution, but Ren's grip was too tight and their minds too stunned to be of any assistance as Ren said,
"Farewell ladies! I'll be sure he finishes his homework!"
"Noooooooo!"
And everyone around them watched.
Silence.
Well that certainly wouldn't help the rumors.
"Uh...what happened?"
"I'm...not completely sure, but I have a hunch it's unusual torture."
"Unusual torture?"
"He's gonna have him do his homework, remember?"
She stared, then flinched. "Oh."
Akira thought so. Ann wasn't much better when it came to schoolwork.
"Anyways, still up for those stories?"
"Oh right! Yeah! I know just the place."
The two of them took the train to Inokashira Park, where the blonde led her to a rather secluded spot and sat on the fence there. Apparently it was Ann's favorite spot. She could see why with the good view and peaceful atmosphere. There, Akira told her quite a few silly tales of when she and her brother were younger, though admittedly even though they were embarrassing—like when he attempted to recite "A Midsummer Night's Dream" in English when he was about eleven years old—they were all about him doing something stupid because he wanted to do something nice—like said Shakespeare attempt, which he had done for Mom's birthday because she liked that play—so she personally didn't think them that embarrassing.
But well they were the best she had.
At least Ann seemed satisfied with them if that mischievous smile she had by the end was any indication. Though Akira was curious...
"Why'd you wanna know all of a sudden?"
The blonde flushed. "Ah, well..."
Akira smirked behind her mask. "Big Bro got you, didn't he?"
She pouted and glowered. "Hey! Don't look at me like that! It wasn't fair! Him and Shiho were teasing me!"
Huh? "Suzui?"
"Oh right...I didn't tell you..."
Ann quickly seized the chance to divert her embarrassment, but Akira let her—this time—considering what she was telling her.
She smiled. "Finally he did it."
"Huh? Finally?"
Despite smiling, she was somber as she said, "Big Bro's been wantin' to visit for a while."
"A while?"
"Yeah. Pretty sure since Suzui well...y'know."
Ann stared in shock. "What?" She frowned. "But then...why didn't he visit before yesterday?"
"I don't know for sure but...if I had to guess, he feels pretty bad about what happened to Suzui. I know we all do but..."
"But what?"
"I found him on the roof that day, crying his eyes out. He probably tried to catch her but...wasn't able to." Despite that admittance, Akira legitimately smiled. "So thanks for lettin' him come and visit Suzui. If you don't mind...could you invite him along more often? I know he'll be too stubborn to see her again."
Ann was silent for a while, the air awkward, not that Akira blamed her. It was hard to follow up on that. But eventually, the natural blonde, with eyes glazed from unshed tears, said,
"Sure. I'll do that. I promise." She smiled. "Thanks for telling me."
"No problem."
Author's Notes: Yes I had a whole chapter dedicated, more or less, to Operation Maidwatch. I can't help it.
Light the Fire is in reference to both Amazon Kindle app and "Light the Fire Up in the Night", the battle theme of Persona Q.