Love Struck Eternal
Chapter 18 - A cause for attention.
Zeta's POV.
"I don't know what to tell you Zeta." Marx said to me as we stood side by side next to Raptor's bed in the hospital.
Marx was a long time family friend and a personal friend of Raptor's nearly in his late fifties and still an amazing doctor among the service. A cat that displayed his age well. What was once pure white fur that covered his body was now gray. He still had that same black patch nearest his metal arm, but regardless still looked good despite.
"I ran every test I could. Even with him being what he is, nothing came back negative. He's in perfect shape apart from the mental scars of course he's had to carry his whole life."
"But he just collapsed. He's never just outright fainted on me or anyone. Especially when he's been nothing but in perfect health; ever since the war ended and his term ended. And the blood he coughed up? That's just what? Nothing to be worried about? Marx, that isn't a good sign." I tried to tell him.
Keeping calm and relaxed the cat replied.
"I don't know what happened to him, but I'm telling you truthfully that he's okay. He just needs rest. We'll discharge him in the morning. Okay?"
Letting out a sigh, I replied while leaning over my boyfriend's sleeping body.
"Okay."
Marx gently touched my arm before making his way to the exit. Once he was gone, I questioned what could have happened. This wasn't just random. Everything has a meaning in life and this has to have some significance. What scared me was this thought in the back of my head.
What if this had something to do with Samantha? My mother had a similar experience when I was a kid and I went to the hospital and almost died. She grew ill the worse I got. It's not unheard of. I've seen and heard of other similar stories from across the world. The bond with your child can cause these things to happen to a parent. It shows just how much he truly cares about her if that's the case. Yet I refused to panic. Even with Sam not answering or returning my calls. I have yet to talk to Pepper or Char. I know both of which called and left her messages as well. It had to be really early in the morning over where she was. She was probably asleep with her phone on mute. I prayed that to be the truth behind her silence.
As time passed, I looked back to see the door open. Char came walking in all dressed down in a brown suit with his jacket over his shoulder. Yoga was at his side as they shut the door behind themselves. With a look of worry all across Char's face, I opened my arms and offered him a hug as he asked.
"How is he?"
"He's okay. Marx says he's in perfect health and we have nothing to worry about. Have you heard anything from Sam?"
"No." He replied as we released one another to look back at Raptor.
"Your sister wants me to send a search party after your daughter. I'm afraid she's serious."
"We're both just scared. This is all so sudden and a lot of the time Pep has been like a second mother to my baby. She has her right to worry. But please Char…..don't send anyone. It's what time over there right now?" I asked him as he calmly replied back with a small smile.
"Around one in the morning."
"See? She's probably asleep. I want to give it till the morning. She'll call one of us back. She will."
"I hate to keep putting more work on the guy, but can't Peek go check and make sure she's good?" Yoga wondered as both Char and I looked back at him to reply.
"No."
Yoga nodded his head as Char expanded on the decision by stating.
"He's already done enough. We'd all look like a bunch of worried children if we sent him to check on her every time she doesn't call in. She's going through a lot. She needs her time away from all the stress."
Somewhat confused, I asked Char.
"What do you mean by saying he's already done enough?"
Giving me a straight look back, the wolf replied.
"Raptor had him check up on her a few weeks ago. Not long after she left. He wanted to be sure she was okay and since she wouldn't talk to him; it was his only method to relay whatever he wanted to say to his daughter. She's okay according to him. Has a nice little apartment and is working on finding a school to attend."
Looking back at Raptor, I questioned why he wouldn't have told me he did that. I wouldn't have been upset with him doing so. I understand where he's coming from. He's hurting as her father and Peek is probably the only person that he knew Samantha would talk to. It made sense, but still….I would have liked to know. I know we aren't really talking to each other the same, but again….why?"
"He could have told me." I mumbled out loud as Char reached in to put his hand on my shoulder. With his voice as calm as always, he said back to me gently.
"He was worried. Leave it be for now Zeta. Just be grateful he's gonna live. I know we all are. You know how much press is outside this fucking hospital trying to get a sneak peak of the first president who they think is on his deathbed?"
"He's not dying though." I chuckled as Yoga jumped in to state.
"That doesn't stop people from spreading rumors. All it took was one crazed employee to start spreading lies. You know people these days. Everyone is trying to get more views and attention online for their personal exposure. They don't care who it's about. Even if they owe him everything."
"You should clear the air to them by the way. It'll shut this all down early and save him the headache once he's up and running again." Char whispered into my side with a gentle nudge of his elbow to my arm.
Giving them both a wide smile and another small laugh, I accepted my duty and turned around to start heading for the door.
Char's POV.
Zeta marched off leaving me with Yoga who I asked once the door was closed.
"You think she bought it?"
Shrugging he replied.
"I don't know. Seemed good enough to me."
Letting out a sigh as my ferret friend adjusted his rifle, I ran my hand over my face and all the way to the back of my head. Once my hair adjusted, I mumbled.
"All that matters is the fact that Sam had nothing to do with Rosco's plan to rob Zandro. And thankfully Peek got us back our stockpile without trouble and with her cooperation. The last thing I want to think about is my niece being my enemy. I don't think I could handle it."
"You don't think? What about them two?" Yoga mentioned as he referred to both her mother and father. Shaking my head I replied.
"They lost enough in their lives. Losing Sam? It's a thought I'm scared to think about Yoga. Zeta would….? Raptor couldn't…...I mean…..ahhhh. I don't know what to say to really explain it."
"Then don't man. Let's just be happy shits okay and get you back to the mistress before she has her way with the kids."
Breaking out and starting to laugh, I turned around to fully apprentice my bodyguard. Giving him a bountiful smile, I asked him as my response to his suggestion.
"How many times do I have to tell you that my girlfriend isn't a fucking dictator? She's the most laid back woman I've ever met."
Starting to chuckle, Yoga nodded and took a step back while at the same time replying.
"I know man. I'm just fucking with ya. Come on."
"I give the orders too." I informed him as I collected my feet and followed him happily to the door.
The ferret just continued to laugh as he knew how to push me in the right direction every time things got depressing in my life.
Sam's POV, The next morning.
Blood slowly dripped off my wrist and into the sink as I spent the last few hours tearing into my own skin using nothing but my claws. I was so heartbroken and angry I just couldn't find any release other than self harm.
The cuts weren't deep. Just enough to draw blood. Blood that ran under Mocha's collar and sent me into a trance that revolved around planning my next one hundred steps of action. Everything was just on halt until Minky received my funds from the scholarship I sent out to the address he gave me hours ago. Once I had that and the paperwork, I planned to change my life. My father's advice rang through my ears louder than any gunshot. It played back every ten seconds.
"Please focus on yourself. You have nothing stopping you from pursuing your goals. Take advantage of that and your scholarship and put all that anger into something better. Something you want to do with your life."
I heard this playback so much I personally began to repeat it out loud after a few hours. And the more I thought about it's true meaning, the urge of wanting to educate myself went away. I wanted to hurt somebody so badly and I knew I couldn't right now; so my only sensible option became myself.
I had no self worth. No need to want to better myself. All that mattered was revenge and George's face along with Cora's and all those who wronged me had begun to appear before my eyes. My venom was burning in my heart. Between that and this hatred, I was going to learn to kill. I was going to join the army and once there I would start this path and as I walked it I would burn down everything around me. I don't care what else I lose along the way. Anyone got in my way and they'd be considered my enemy. I want to kill. I need to kill. My mind and body was ready. I was prepared to handle the burden of becoming a killer.
"Vrrrrrr! Vrrrrrr! Vrrrrr!"
Resting on the sink next to me was my phone. The vibration broke me away from my dark state for enough time that I registered who it was calling me. Letting my venom seal my wounds, I grabbed the phone and answered, but didn't say a single word. In time I heard Teddy's voice say to me in confusion.
"Sam? Are you there?"
Struggling to find my tongue, I replied after fumbling a couple of attempts.
"Yeah."
Now happy to hear me respond, Teddy asked me.
"Hey. How are you?"
"I'm…..I'm okay. What's up?"
Hearing him cough, I listened with my eyes shut as he replied.
"Nothing personally. I'm still getting used to my post over here, but I'm happy."
"Then why are you calling me?" I asked him with some anger rising back up from below.
The bear's tone switched completely around. He now seemed caught completely off guard as he replied with uncertainty.
"To check up on you? We haven't talked since you left the middle east. And….and you're my best friend Sam. I feel obligated to keep in touch. What's wrong? You sound mad."
"Teddy just….?" I cut myself off. None of this was his fault. He waited silently as I collected myself before trying again.
"Teddy, I'm just overwhelmed with everything right now and it's just not a good time to have me talking. I'm sorry."
"What happened?" He proceeded to ask.
My eyes went to my wrist where Mocha's collar hung. A tear came to my eyes as I attempted to calm down. I'm sure Teddy could hear me, but I couldn't tell him the truth. He'd just tell my parents and the last thing I want is to get them involved. She's dead because of me. This isn't anyone else's fault or burden to carry. But I just started to cry more at the thought of it all coming back. At which point, Teddy begged.
"Don't cry. Please Sam, don't cry. You know I can't handle that shit coming from you. Everything's okay. Do you hear me? Please stop. Just breathe."
"I'm sorry Teddy. I can't do this right now with you. I need to hang up."
"No Sam, stop." He ordered me as I remained on the line.
"What's wrong? Talk to me. You know I have your back. What happened?"
For a moment I was about to break and tell him, but fear took over so I hung up immediately after I had considered the idea. After, I fell back down to my knees gripping them in my hands and crying as hard as I could. In seconds, I turned my body into a ball and just laid there sobbing. I felt a text message come not long before I got to this position and I already knew it was from my poor friend. I didn't have the guts to look at it, so I just tossed my phone through the open doorway where it landed under the bed.
What could I do right now other than hate myself? I had so much time to kill. It would be days till I had everything together. I don't care if I stay on this floor for it all. I just didn't know what else to do other than cry my sorrow away.
Hours later.
After an hour of crying I passed out and awoke god knows when; to find myself still on the bathroom floor in a hot mess. My face was dry and stained from the tears I shed and with little energy left to change; I settled by crawling back into the bathtub where I put back on the water and laid down again.
I prayed I'd pass out again. Only this time I had hopes that I would drown myself among the water.
The next morning.
I couldn't move. My body shut itself down after hours of laying in the water. My tears had stopped flowing and all that remained of my mental condition was the simple fact that for the last six hours I've been staring at the shower head from my back. I had no food in my system. I was starving, but I also had no desire to leave the position I was in. I spent the last two days completely naked. I had clothes in the bag that was on the bed, but where was I going? Nowhere. I thought to myself as I zoned out.
An hour more.
"Sam?...Sam?...Sam!"
All the sudden I felt a hand hit my shoulder and a loud voice break through the deafening sound of the shower water. Once my eyes had readjusted, I stopped to stare at a familiar yellow echidna. He was still wearing the same cloak from before. He kept his hand on my shoulder as I attempted to say something back to his sudden presence.
"Yeah?"
He looked so calm for some reason. Not saying anything back to me, I watched faintly as he reached above me to turn off the water. After it was done, he looked back and reached in to help me up. I couldn't move my legs. He had to physically carry me out of the bathtub and into another towel. As he dried my head, back, and chest, he said to me softly.
"You're making this harder than it has to be."
"What do you care?" I asked him as he ignored my question to continue drying my body.
"You never even told me your name. I don't even think you're real. How can you be? I don't even know you. I've never seen you before."
Working on my legs and continuing to be silent, I proceeded to ask him.
"What are you? I shouldn't even be here. I should be dead. I…..I want to be dead."
"Shut up." He urged me nicely as he finished with my feet.
I didn't know what else to say to him. I was fully engrossed in thinking this was another figment of my imagination.
Gently tossing the towel aside, the echidna got back under my arm and carried me out of the bathroom and back towards the bed. From there, he laid me down and let out a small sigh as I attempted to roll onto my side that was nearest my bag. I then heard him bend down and in seconds I saw why. Because when he stood back up he had my phone in his one hand and his other checking my lock screen.
Once I had reached the bag, I let out a deep groan and rolled back over till I was on my back again.
"You're a popular woman. Ten missed calls and….?"
"Just shut up and do what you came here to do." I begged him out of the blue.
The echidna lowered my phone in awe to see I had my legs parted enough for him to see my crotch in full form. From there I begged him again with new tears emerging.
"Just do it!"
Giving me a solid look of disgust the echidna questioned.
"Is that what you want? Do you seriously think I'm here because I want to rape you?"
"Why else are you here again helping me?" I responded back with. The man gently tossed my phone into my duffel and reached in to pull out my fresh set of clothes. Putting them down on top of Mocha's vest, he replied.
"Because it's my job. You can't see that and that's fine till you get your shit together, but as of right now I need you to believe me when I tell you I'm not here to fucking take advantage of you're body."
"Why not?" I asked him back. I was kinda offended, but I think that's mainly because of the lack of food in my system. I was dizzy and out of my own mind at this point into my depression. Blood loss didn't help either. I was still recovering from that. I think he knew that as well because his response after I asked that was simply this.
"Because you have a lot more going for you than you think. You're blinded right now from reality. You've lost your mind to your own emotions. You aren't right. Now please…..sit up." He begged as I struggled to listen. My body barely could move at all, but somehow I managed and leveled myself with him. Giving me a gentle nod, the echidna reached in to run his right hand under my chin. He went till he reached the underside of my right ear. I felt his fingers sit there for a second before starting to feel a slight burn. It was then he told me his reason for doing so.
"You're special and this proves it."
"What? What did you do?" I asked him as I gently pushed his hand away. Lowering his arm he replied.
"I'm helping you help yourself. You spent your life under your father's boot; you never really got a chance to see and experience what real life is like."
Giving him a puzzled look back, I continued to listen as he reached over to pick up my underwear. Placing them on my lap, he said to me.
"This world doesn't live by your rules. You will not be handed what you desire without loss and pain coming along the way. And up till recently the closest you came to that was getting a B on your report card. You're spoiled Samantha. Shielded. Sheltered. All those things you're mother and father never got but wanted when they were your age. They grow up to have you and guess what happens? They give you everything they never had as a child. A future."
At this point the echidna reached up to lower his cloak's hood. I got a very good understanding of just how formed his face and body went for one another. He looked about as jacked as my father. Except there was a clear difference in body types. My dad was a soldier. He had the soldier's dream build. You looked at him and you just knew who and what he was. But this guy? When I look at him I for some reason sense a worried parent. Like Teddy's dad. A big guy with a warm heart. Maybe it was a little hard to see, but once you did you appreciated all he said to you. Even if he just got done calling me a spoiled brat. Even then I couldn't retaliate. It was a true statement. I was spoiled. I was shielded. And I most definitely was sheltered. From what I saw as love, it turned out to be my parent's fear. I was starting to see that and it became even more real to me once this echidna handed me my pants and shirt to state.
"Spoils of war and hardship gave you everything. It paid for the bills. It kept you safe. But can you be convinced that it was just out of love? No Samantha. You can't. You can't fall for those kinds of tricks."
"What tricks?" I asked him as he went on to say to me.
"Your parents looked at one another and agreed to give you the best future possible. No expense was too great. They made sure you went to the best schools, had the best teachers, and made the right friends. They told you what you could and couldn't do. Made you behave a certain type of way to protect their image. What would it say about them if the world slowly found out their only child was a failure or some kind of criminal if they just gave you the freedom they had growing up? They refuse to see you go down any dark path. They worked to keep you away from growing up. They held you back in everything except your schoolwork."
"And that's wrong of them?" I asked him back in confusion as he just began to walk around the room. His eyes were looking to the ceiling and after a moment or so did he reply to my question.
"No. Of course not."
"Then what's your point?"
Stopping near the bathroom door; he looked in towards the sink to say back.
"The point is simple. You're soft. You haven't had any suffering to contend with. No real problems to worry about till now. You grew up away from the madness."
Turning his way back in my direction, the echidna looked me right in the eyes to state.
"Now I'm not a good person. I'm blunt and I'm not going to make things easier for you to understand or take, because that would defeat the purpose. You need to get kicked in your teeth. Consider it a wake up call. Take your life and purpose seriously now that you know how things can be if you let too many people in. Select your battles. Select your friends. You don't consider the negatives and you need to start if you plan to one day see your course to its end. Mocha? I'm sorry for what happened, but you need to move on. Move forward with the experience and learn. What you're doing now? How you're acting? You won't get anything done if you allow your emotions to trap you in. And right now? That's exactly what you're letting it do."
"Move on? It's not human to just move on without grief. Mocha may not have been anyone to you, but she was as close to a sister as I got in my life. I can't just move on."
"You can and you will." He informed me as I questioned.
"What's your game? You don't even know me."
Moving till he was right in front of me, the echidna reached in to grab the dog tags that were on my neck. I widened my eyes as he knelt down between my legs to reply.
"You're right. I don't know you. But…..I know of you."
Our eyes locked and with a simple yet serious look on his face, the man said to me.
"I'm Roslin."
His hand then slipped off my dog tags and from there he put it back on his side to state.
"You would never know this, but you're dad and I know each other."
"Really?" I replied back in confusion as he nodded and stood up.
"We're not friends. So please don't get the wrong idea. In fact…..I personally hate who he is and what he stands for. The power he has? He was given that. And Sam? Just because someone gives you something, that does not mean you've earned it."
"What do you mean? What does he have to do with any of this?"
"He doesn't. Yet you did show interest in the "game" I was playing. I'm simply attempting to give you insight."
"Insight into what? My own dad?" I questioned as he just nodded his head once to reply after standing back up.
"Your dad is a scumbag. Do you know about his past? Do you know the kind of things he's done to get where he is right now? If it wasn't for the gifts he has; he would have been killed a long time ago by G.U.N. The war for the middle east wouldn't have turned out the way it did. But most importantly…...you wouldn't even be here."
"What are you?" I asked him again, but this time with a peak of concern for where this was going.
"For now? I'm what I claimed to be when we first met in that alleyway. I'm a friend and that will not change so long as you have a path to follow like this one. However….?"
Roslin stopped his sentence to take a short walk towards the bathroom door. I couldn't see the other side of it and that seemed to be his target. I watched in silence as he reached around to swing the door closed. On a hook facing us hung my hat. Gently taking it off the hook, Roslin looked back at me to fling it. I somehow managed to catch it and when I did our eyes connected again. With a small smile he urged me.
"Get yourself together. I may not like your dad, but if there is one thing you have in common that I do like, it's the fact that I can see your potential. Your real potential. But you won't ever see that for yourself without help and for your sake, I will not just watch as you get closer to killing yourself this close from the start."
I was completely at a loss for this man. This was all so bizarre. I had so many questions, but very little ability to speak. I was absolutely stuck in a mental moment and without any other questions; Roslin urged me while walking to the door.
"Get dressed. I'll be waiting for you outside."
"Wait. What are we doing?" I questioned as he pointed at my stomach to laugh and reply.
"We're gonna go eat. And don't worry, it's on me."
Roslin left the room and I couldn't help but feel like I was trapped in a weird spot. All those questions still swamped around my head and when I got back to looking at my own lap; I stopped all my thinking to stare at Mocha's collar that was still on my wrist. Something about it made me recover a little slip of myself from before and without even thinking about it I got on my clothes to meet the echidna outside. He smiled when he saw me and waited and watched as I put my hat on backwards and asked.
"Do you live around here?"
Offering me his hand, I gently allowed him to guide me forward till the same hand was on my back and we were walking down the hallway. A few steps later he replied.
"No. Not at all. The city life was never for me. Never has been and it never will. Too many people, too much traffic, and not enough fresh air. That being the most important."
"So what are you doing in Los Angeles then?" I wondered nicely enough as I was still slightly adjusting to my own two feet again.
Walking into the elevator, the echidna hit the ground floor button then replied to me.
"Let's just say I'm here on business Samantha."
"Business that involves me?" I questioned as he just stared back at me with two easy eyes.
"You don't make a whole lot of sense to me." I proceeded to inform him bluntly.
"Good. I'm not supposed to." He informed me back as I then had to ask the question.
"What are you talking about? Are you part of the network? A contractor? You look like the type. I mean….what's with the cloak?"
Roslin for a second looked like he was confused as I questioned the outfit. His eyes even drifted to the cloak itself before stating back to me.
"I've had it for nearly my whole life. It's just part of who I am and that does not make me a contractor. I'm the furthest thing from it in fact."
I was expecting him to say more, but once the elevator stopped and the door began to open; he switched gears by saying to me.
"Let's not talk about this kind of thing while we're in the open. You don't know who could be listening."
I nodded and followed him out of the elevator.
"What do you eat? You're a wolf so I'd assume meat?"
Shrugging my shoulders as we passed the front desk, Roslin got the door and I replied to his concerns.
"I'll eat just about anything right now. I don't care what it is."
With the sun hitting my face the moment we stepped outside the building, Roslin went on to mumble while looking both left and right.
"Well if that's the case then how does Chinese sound? There's a shop just down the road."
Now that I had my first breath of fresh air in my lungs, I was struggling to keep myself moving. It just felt good to be outside after everything. I grew even more lost when I looked back at Roslin to see he was indeed a character. He looked so intimidating, but I blamed most of that on his species and that damn cloak. In fact, it was the first thing that caught my attention now that I had a good view of it in all its glory; and there was a slight wind. Enough to blow it slightly to the side and expose what was under it.
A gun. My heart skipped a beat and before I could even ask him what that was about, he ordered me calmly while again putting his hand on my back to help guide me further to our destination.
"Don't overthink that. We can talk once we've sat down."
I couldn't respond. My voice felt like it was being forced closed by something. How'd he know what I was thinking? It reminded me of my father. He's done that to me once or twice in the past and I considered it nothing but blind luck, but this seemed different.
Now the trip didn't take us that long. Roslin was soon holding the door open for me and when I got by him I was then asked by a nearby greeter.
"Table for two?"
"Ahh…...yes please." I replied as I heard the door behind me shut.
I did my best to stay on course and Roslin now followed me till we got to our table. I sat down across from him and without even thinking I asked the echidna.
"Are you hungry?"
The man nodded once and looked to the waiter to reply.
"I could go for something small. Surprise me."
Somewhat taken, the waiter questioned.
"Surprise you? You mean….?"
"I mean surprise me. Just pick something from the menu that's small. I'll take whatever it is. Price doesn't concern me and no I'm not allergic to anything. So let your imagination run with it kid. Sam? It's your turn." He informed me with a smile as I nodded and looked at the menu to respond a short moment later.
"I'll have some of the Chow Mein please. And water, if that's okay."
"Of course miss. We'll get it out to you shortly."
"Thank you." I replied as he left us together.
Once he was gone my eyes went back to Roslin who undid his cloak for the first time. I remained silent as he took it off and laid it down on the seat next to him. He was wearing a pretty beaten down black sleeveless tee. It had some dirt or something on it in more than a few locations. Along with a couple of small cuts and breaks throughout the fabric. He caught my eyes checking him out and calmly said to me while reaching for his gun.
"Apologies if I'm not the nicest looking man out here. I've had little need to alternate my clothing, but at the very least I don't smell."
As if I didn't know that by now. I had my mother's nose. I could smell anything from a mile out. It didn't matter what it was, I would know where it was coming from.
Deciding to give him a gentle chuckle, but slowly shifting my eyes back to his gun. I took in the position. It was held there by a harness that I believed was a spider harness. Two extra clips could be seen just above it and another two were on the exact other side. Taking out his gun and putting it in his lap, Roslin mumbled while unloading the mag.
"Now I already made myself clear to you that I'm not a contractor. I would also go out on a limb to say I think I've done more than enough to prove to you that if all I cared about was your life; I would have already taken it by now. You've given me more than enough chances to do that if that was my goal."
"So what's with the heat?"
Putting the gun away and tucking the clip in a free cuff next to the others, he replied.
"Why are you carrying? For protection. That's all."
He had me on that so I just accepted that answer as the waiter came back with my water. For a second he stopped to take notice of Roslin's holstered weapon, but he quickly turned and walked off. I had a feeling he was gonna raise an alarm in due time, but I couldn't help but feel okay as Roslin himself informed me.
"Don't worry about it. If anything happens I'll handle it. Just focus for a second and look at me."
I took a sip of water and put my cup down to look back into his eyes. He looked very relaxed and with a straight face said to me.
"Who I am and what I do isn't something that can be explained very easily with only a few words and that comes with the natural difficulty of my origin. But for you to get a grasp, I need to ask you a very serious question and I expect a very serious answer back. Okay?"
I nodded and readied myself as he took maybe two seconds to breathe then once he was done he asked me.
"Do you know and believe in superstition?"
Somewhat lost, I asked him back.
"What do you mean exactly?"
Sitting up he replied.
"The superstitious? Things along the lines of fiction and make believe? Things that come off as unbelievable to normal people. Sometimes these things are closely related with religious beliefs. Gods and so forth. I know you're not religious just by looking at you. Your parents never pushed you to consider it, right?"
"My mother believes in god, yes, but my father never really showed any interest. And from what I was told from my mother, it was their wish not to push religion upon me. They wanted me to be able to go out into the world and find my own reason to believe in something greater than myself."
Roslin kept himself together quite well once he heard my response, but he remained quiet. I assumed it was because I didn't really answer his last question. So with my mind drawing a blank after about a minute of silence, I said back to him in confusion.
"I don't really know what to say about it personally. I never really considered religion, but that doesn't mean I don't believe one way or the other. I'm open minded and I think about everyone's beliefs. If I wasn't; I find it hard to believe I could ever come to a legitimate answer. You know?"
Now he nodded his head back at me. I kept myself as relaxed as I could as he went on to ask me.
"So what if I told you things like gods were real? Would you believe me?"
Unsure of what to say back indefinitely, I replied.
"I wouldn't disagree with you outright. Like I just said, I feel like anything can be a possibility, but when it comes to something like that it's hard to believe one way or the other because there is no proof such beings exist. I mean people claim they have met gods in the past, but every story I've heard has always seemed way too far out there to comprehend. Those who tell the tales sound….?"
"Crazy?" He interrupted me by asking. I just gulped and nodded my head as he seemed to accept that.
Putting a hand up on the counter for me to see, I brought my eyes down to stare at his very rough looking palm. Very gently Roslin curled his fingers to wonder in a quiet form.
"So what would you have to see to believe? An act of god is what I mean. What's within reach that you can think of as a logical form of evidence?"
Somewhat amazed by the question, I chuckled and questioned back.
"What? Haha…...what do you mean? An act of god?"
Nodding he reformed his question.
"When you hear about gods what comes to mind? What are some things that only gods can do?"
Stopping my chuckles, I took a moment to legitimately think it over because at first I thought he was kinda joking, but he was still looking at me with the utmost serious look in his eyes.
What was I going to say to him? I still had no idea who he really was and judging from his attitude and appearance it was clear he was misplaced in this part of the world. In fact when I really considered everything about him I had to wonder how he saved my life. I wasn't in any pain nor did I have any scars apart from my face, but that still didn't explain the rest. So after a few minutes of deep thought that he didn't dare interrupt, I replied with some uncertainty to my voice which made it come off as if I was asking him a question.
"I don't know?"
Letting out a faint sigh, Roslin leaned back and urged me calmly.
"Don't think too hard about it."
"Can you walk on water?" I asked him with another small laugh which I saw got his attention but in a bad way. He now looked somewhat annoyed with my laughter, but before showing it he replied to my question.
"If there was water to walk on around here then that could be possible, but give me something within a reasonable distance of this table."
"Like what?" I questioned as he sighed again which got me to shut up and think. After a moment or so I began to look around. I couldn't fucking think of a damn thing. This was such a bizarre subject to be talking about, but thankfully the waiter came back within the next minute with our food. That quickly became my focus and my hope that this would start to shift us away from something I couldn't really answer. Roslin thankfully remained quiet as my need to eat kicked in at full peak. I never ate so fast in my life and I think I lost focus on the time because by the time I was nearly done with my plate he asked me.
"Better?"
"Yes. So much better. Thank you." I replied as I wiped my face with a nearby napkin.
Roslin during my feast must have taken a bite or two out of his surprise dish. It looked like Sichuan pork and with my eyes now focused back on him; I watched as he took another bite. He seemed so indifferent about it. Showed no reaction to it's taste and at least if it was in front of me I know for a fact I'd devour it.
"Cling." Putting down his fork the echidna pushed the plate over to me to ask.
"You want the rest? I'm good."
With wide eyes I questioned.
"Are you sure?"
"Absolutely. I don't need much and you're starving. So please. Be my guest."
"Okay?" I replied back as I took back my fork to start finishing his dish.
Silence was a thing between us for most of this ordeal it seemed; after I failed to give him the answer he wanted. However once I was on my last bite the echidna leaned back up to ask me.
"How about demons? Do you believe they exist in this world?"
"I believe in ghosts and bad spirits. I would think demons could be one in the same from that view." I informed him as he took a moment to ask me a more specific question.
"Have you heard of the Egyptian god of the underworld Anubis?"
"Yes." I replied as he nodded and went on to say.
"A good man. Half jackal but still mostly human in nature. Overshadowed by Osiris early in his career."
"Little history lesson?" I wondered as he shook his head to reply.
"I'm making an example. Anpu was the god of death a very long time ago. Little do you or anyone know, Anpu was very simple when it came to his job. Made it easy to understand why he was doing what he was put in charge of doing. There was never any confusion when he made his presence known to mortals who practiced him. Nowadays barely anyone looks at men like that. It's outright considered evil or even fictional to think one person can have such responsibilities."
"You sound offended." I informed him as I caught wind that he seemed personally invested in this subject. Giving me two straight but serious eyes back he replied.
"Not offended. Again I'm just making an example. Demons are just as real as any gods. Only difference between them is the title and position they hold. Some demons are purely around to cause trouble among mortals. Those are what you consider spirits. But real demons are those like Anubis. A god who holds the position of being in charge of death and dishing out fates in the afterlife. He could kill anyone at any time. It's as easy as breathing. Yet he could also choose to save a life if he deemed that person a potential ally. Someone who could bring about more harm than good. If a kid wanted to kill his family, but suddenly met a tragic fate before the deed could come to be. Anubis stepped in to save the kid's life. Just so he could have the chance to finish what he intended. Do you follow?"
I did so I carefully nodded my head once. Roslin seemed content so far, but I was getting more and more concerned. This subject was dark. Really dark all of a sudden. However, that didn't stop him from telling me.
"You lost two things by coming to the US. Your dog and your life. That's a lot when I see a young girl like yourself with no experience in life and it's cruelty. Now I want you to not lie to me Sam when I ask you this, but now that you've had time to think on it all….you have no other desire left in you other than to see the men who did you wrong dead. Yes?"
I was one hundred percent focused now as he had no way of even knowing that. He could only assume, but that didn't explain his certainty when he asked it the way he did. Sensing I was now hooked, Roslin reached up to touch under his ear. The same ear he touched on me.
"I'm giving you the chance to see that become a reality. You haven't seen it yet, but you now bear a mark of my own doing. You are that poor kid I just mentioned and you're alive because I can see your potential. Those men? The ones who killed Mocha and nearly killed you? They will die Sam. They must. For if they don't you would be severely disappointing."
I wanted to question him, but I had no words as he reached in to take my water. He took one sip before asking me.
"You're already too invested to turn back ya? The scholarship is gone. You're hiding from the world by crossing out your own name and you're waiting on your new identity to be delivered. You haven't even considered informing your family about this. For reasons we both know already. You're going down a path of your own creation, but it's what you need to see the truth. To see the potential you have. You may have your mother's eyes and her wit, but you have your father's ability to kill. What's that tell you?" He asked me as he also gently pushed my cup of water back into my waiting hand.
"I already know what you're thinking before you even think about it. I know what you plan to do and I know the outcomes. Your life of innocence and being blind is over Samantha. You're free from all that now that you're here with me. You can call me crazy all you want but the sooner you see past what took your dad years to understand and comprehend; the sooner we can get the ball rolling past this slope you're sitting at."
Without even looking away, Roslin leaned in on the table to state to me.
"I'm one of those demons you fear. I'm the only reason you're alive and despite how crazy I must sound, I know you're smart enough to consider it as truth. But I also know you're smart enough to not be convinced by words alone. So I want you to look at someone in this room. Look at them and don't be scared. For you are about to awaken from your slumber and proceed to set them down for their own."
Roslin sat back now and just stared at me with his arms crossed. I was at a standstill. My eyes wanted to look around, but I was actually struck with fear for his words. I had an idea for what he meant when he said I'd be putting someone to rest, but once my eyes had slipped back onto the young waiter who had served us, I felt every fiber of my being snap when he suddenly collapsed. He fell down hard from where he was. He must have been on his way out of the kitchen because in his hands were two drinks. Those came down with him as a few nearby tables all panicked and began to scream from the sudden situation. I even pushed myself further back against the wall as Roslin just watched as a few of the workers tried to perform CPR.
"Someone call an ambulance!" A woman screamed over the ordeal as I began to shake.
My whole body was cold and I couldn't help but feel my heartbeat racing higher up as that same woman announced.
"He's not breathing!"
"Nor will he ever again." Roslin mumbled as he collected his cloak. My eyes spun back around to look at the man as he just calmly wrapped himself up. Once he was ready to go, did he stand up from his seat to order me.
"Come on now. Let's go before the police get here."
I still couldn't move. This man…...what the hell did he just do? There is no fucking way this was real. What just happened couldn't have just happened by chance. I refuse to believe it, but that's what scared me even more now. Everything he's said up till now made no sense to me, but how could anyone take him seriously when he sounds like a mad shaman spitting crazy bullshit.
"It's not bullshit Samantha. Now please…..get up. We need to leave."
All I could do was try and move. I had to move. He was reading my mind and giving me even more reasons to be concerned with reality and what I thought was actuality.
Looking Roslin straight in his face, I asked him out of fear for what would come next.
"Why? What did you do to that guy? How did you….?"
I stopped talking because he now stuck his hand out for me to take. I had no more power to fight him. He was being so relaxed about a guy just fucking dying, but if he was really a demon like he claims then I guess he just doesn't fucking care. But he knew about my plans. He somehow knew the majority and I was left to question my own ability to challenge his requests. If he really did just kill that man then the last thing I wanted to do was go down an even deeper hole. So very slowly I took his hand and before I knew it we were walking out of the restaurant together. It took me a few minutes to adjust back to a normal level of calmness and the direction we were walking was right on back to the hotel where I was staying thanks to him.
Stepping back onto the elevator and shutting the door, I asked him in fear still of this being real.
"What really are you Roslin? What did you just do back there to that guy? How am I alive? Am I just dreaming all this?"
Giving me a faint chuckle, he replied as the door opened onto my floor.
"Don't you wish this was all a dream? I do. Hehe." He continued to laugh as he took the first step forward. I remained behind because I physically couldn't move my legs. I was still so scared. The echidna stopped once he realized I wasn't moving and looked back at me to say.
"This isn't a dream. What I am and what I do will take time to understand because I simply refuse to give you every answer you seek. You want answers to the things that scare you like this? I'll give you one for free so you can at the very least trust me a little."
I kept myself perfectly silent as he said to me with genuine care to his voice.
"I saved you from death because to me you have the ability to reshape the world and those in it. Problem is you have no taint to your name. No experience. You needed something to wake you up from the fantasy your parents put you in. It was a rough awakening; that I can see and no I don't expect you to simply cast aside what that dog meant to you, but this world and your life outweighs a dog and the pain that comes with it's loss."
Roslin came back into the elevator now to stand right in front of me. With a gentle touch he reached out to feel under my ear. My eyes never left him as he whispered.
"You could have died. I could have let you. But I didn't. I have yet to see if I'll regret that or not, but you and I have a connection. You have a burning desire to kill in your eyes and a mind that only a sadist carries deep within your heart. You gave me your soul in return for a chance at revenge. Your father once did the same to another of my kind."
"What?" I questioned breathlessly as he ran his hand under my chin now to lift up my head slightly.
"That's one of those things you have yet to earn. You prove your worth and I'll tell you more about this world and it's dark secrets. Your parents being a centerpiece of that. Do you understand?"
For some reason his hand began to warm up under me and I quickly began to calm down. It was unnatural, but it was enough to bring me to reply.
"Yes."
Giving me a smile, Roslin released my chin and now just kindly offered up his hand again. I took it and he guided me out of the elevator very slowly. On the way out he said to me.
"From this moment going forward, I want you to continue this path you're contemplating. You have a very good plan ahead and enough anger in your heart to succeed. Use that anger and you'll develop your skills along the way. I will be watching you. From time to time I'll visit. No matter where you are; I will be there paying a close eye to your form. Stray from this path and you'll find only pain in your wake. Trust me, I know it very well."
By this point we got back to my room and Roslin opened the door to let me go in first. We let each other go and I found myself sitting down back on the bed next to Mocha's vest. The echidna came to my side to sit down next to me. My eyes couldn't look back up at him because I felt unworthy. My mind was fixated on what he was. He was a god and he was going to help me avenge Mocha? I had no reason to question him further and without a doubt I accepted the facts he spoke. I signed my life away for this opportunity and I'd do whatever I must to make sure it wasn't a waste and he was pleased.
Putting a hand on my back, Roslin informed me.
"You're very smart Samantha. You're beyond that of most and with my help you'll be able to do anything you want with your life. This revenge you seek? Let it be your first focus before anything else. Yeah?"
"Yes sir." I replied as he nodded and went on to say.
"I want you and not for your body. In time you'll become the very thing I aimed to accomplish with my life. I blessed you with some of my power. Once you get to work you'll find I've improved your reflexes and your strength. Even your venom will feel weak when compared. Use this gift and start proving yourself to me. Each time you do; I'll visit and answer a question you have and once you need more I'll give you more. But by no means expose to others who I am and what you are. For if you do I'll have no other choice but to clean up the mess. Am I clear?"
"Yes sir." I replied again as he patted my back and stood up.
"Keep your head up Sam. You have very little reason to return to the hole I found you in. Change your ways and make what you want come true. For once you do I'm sure you'll find your true meaning for living. One piece of advice to you though…..?"
I brought my gaze back up to meet his eyes one last time to listen as he urged me with another small smile.
"Don't trust anyone too easily, for a snake resides in us all. Be that greed or stupidity."
With nothing left in my body to resemble sanity, I didn't even react when he all of a sudden disappeared before my very eyes. I simply exhaled and looked back down between my legs to try and comprehend reality. What came from it was the instant need to get up and run to the bathroom mirror to check under my ear. I found a very small black circle that was cut into four pieces. To me it resembled a planet breaking apart from the inside out and without a doubt it was the final nail I needed in my coffin to be convinced that this all was real.
With no energy left in my body, I returned to the bed and laid down to rest my eyes.
mT Shadow.