CHAPTER FOUR: UNCONSCIOUS BIASES
Disclaimer: References to "KFC" are intended for entertainment only. I am not making any profit from the references. All rights to "KFC" belong to Yum! Brands, Inc.
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"KFC?!" Ranma asked incredulously.
A large paper bucket of fried chicken dangled from Nabiki's right hand. A light snow began to fall as they approached the main gates of Komaba.
She shrugged. "Christmas tomorrow, right (1)? Besides, I know you'll eat it too."
"But I thought — "
"That a small girl like me can't appreciate greasy, wholesome food once in a while?"
"No! I…. That's not what I meant! It's just that… that…."
"That what?" she challenged him. Inside, she smiled. He was still too easy.
"That ya like nice things!" he blurted out.
She could tell that he was proud of what he thought was a brilliant impromptu save. She gleefully decided to drive the stake home, saying matter-of-factly, "KFC is a nice thing."
"I…. Aargh! Nabiki!"
She could not contain her laughter. "You deserve it! If you'd just owned up to your unconscious biases up front, you would've saved yourself from looking like an ass."
"But I'm not an ass! No matter what your sister says!"
She laughed even harder as he set her down, and she carded them into her still empty dorm. "Of course not. At least not for having unconscious biases. Everyone has them.
"But ya just said — "
"I called you out for not owning up to the obvious."
"Like ya own up to yours?"
"I do."
"Yeah, right. I call bullshit."
She stopped just as they got to her door and rounded on him with a frown. "What are you getting at, Saotome?"
"Ya think I'm one of those ungrateful 'have-all' asses that ya hate so much just 'coz I'm the best there is at the Art and I look like a model or somethin' in either of my forms. Ain't that just as much of an unconscious bias?"
"Sorry, but I never called you a 'have-all ass'. I never said you were good looking either — in any form."
"But ya don't deny thinkin' any of that either."
She laughed. "Such a vivid imagination and so confident and sure of your inferences!"
"Cut the crap, Nabiki. It's what ya believe. Ya said as much to Kasumi the other day."
"You annoy the shit out of me, yes, but I don't hate you," she conceded as she plunked the chicken bucket down on her desk and turned for her mini fridge.
"You're a bit of a hypocrite. Ya swear more than any dude I've ever known too. Who knew!"
She froze in the middle of reaching for a canned beer. "Wow. Since when did you get a backbone?"
"Since always."
"Why do I have this strange feeling you're not someone I know?" she said, cautiously drawing herself up to her full height to look at him.
"Same reason I get the feeling you're not someone I know either," he said, his eyes darting between the beer in her good hand, the chicken bucket on her desk, and finally the drawing pad and pencils lying out on her bed. He walked over and studied the unfinished sketch, a self-portrait of her with one of the Komei School children. The surprised lift of his brows gave away that he was clearly impressed.
An awkward silence fell between them, pierced only by the steady, incessant ticking of the second hand of her wall clock. Though she had always known that he was far more intelligent than his behavior often reflected, the reality that suddenly confronted her now disconcerted her. She thought again about what he had said earlier about her sister being an open book that could be read from a mile away. The notion that she had once lived under the same roof as this complete stranger hiding in plain sight for years boggled her mind and wounded her pride. Until now, she had been the best people reader she had ever known.
"Why are you really here, Ranma? Why show your cards now? What do you really want?"
"That chicken's getting cold."
"Ranma!"
He sighed. "Fine. What ya said the other day about me and Akane. Ya're right. Life's short. Honor agreement or not, we either gotta find a way to move forward or move on."
Nabiki regarded Ranma with her best poker face as she carefully eased herself down in her chair and placed the now-open can of Kirin on her desk. Inside, however, she suddenly found herself feeling lightheaded and dizzy with the realization that something bizarrely pivotal was now playing out around her. Thinking back on her last conversation with Kasumi and the last couple of days, she had the vague, premonitory sense of something dangerous and unnatural closing in on her.
Had she really been the Machiavellian Ice Queen that she had worked so hard to make everyone believe that she was, she should have listened to her gut and thrown him out the door right then and there. Somehow, though, as she caught the sorry beseeching eyes of his annoyingly handsome face, she could not bring herself to do so. As frustrating as Akane was, they were still sisters, and Nabiki had promised their mother that she would always look after Akane.
"You're right," she sighed. "The chicken's getting cold."
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The stranger who sat across from Nabiki munching on chicken and leisurely sipping on one of her large canned Kirins sounded amazingly like a rather intelligent, mature, and clear-eyed individual. He even displayed evidence of wit and a sense of humor that proved more than superficially one-dimensional. She actually enjoyed their conversation and his company.
"You don't need my help," she pronounced as their meal wound down. "You're not even such a self-centered, 'have-all' ass after all. If you actually spoke to Akane the way you're talking to me now, you'd be just fine."
"Uh-uh," he said, shaking his head as he leaned back in the chair. "Ain't that simple."
"Why not?"
"Well, that's why I need your help."
"Okay…."
"Not exactly like I dropped into Nerima and your family's home looking for a wife when I was 16. Truthfully, I, uh, well, I….
"What?" she prodded impatiently. "What are you trying to say?
"Can't ya guess by now?"
"Why don't you just tell me? Like the normal person you've been acting like just now. It's actually been kind of nice."
"I told ya. I ain't the person your sister thinks I am, but it also ain't like I cared for her to think good 'bout me either when we all first met. Honestly figured I'd be back on the road with my old man before the week or even the day was out. Ending up with a girl at some point in my life didn't even cross my mind. With Akane all naturally suspicious and stuff…."
Nabiki could no longer focus on what he was saying as the implication of his confession struck her. It had the potential to explain a lot. She had to test her hypothesis. "So, wait. That means…."
"What?" he deadpanned with narrowed, suspicious eyes.
"Do you… prefer boys?"
"WHAT?!"
"Maybe both?"
"H– H– HEY…!"
"There's absolutely no shame in this, you know, Ranma-kun. This is, after all, 21st century Japan."
"NABIKI!"
She flinched involuntarily at the stormy beer- and garlic-laden breeze that blew in her face. From his expression, she immediately knew the answer to her questions. She had not realised how many veins there were on a human forehead or that human skin could possibly flush that brightly and generate that much heat.
For that priceless look alone, she found herself secretly forgiving him for his contributions to her current sorry physical condition. Even then, however, she could not let the game end that easily.
"This is a pretty important little detail, Ranma-kun. Don't get mad. I need a straight answer. We can't go anywhere otherwise."
"I AM NOT GAY!"
"It's okay if you need some time to — "
"I DO NOT! WE WILL NOT COME BACK TO THIS — EVER!"
For the second time that night, Nabiki again could no longer control herself. She broke down with laughter until her insides hurt.
"Why is sexuality such an awkward subject for you, Saotome?" she finally managed to get out. "Especially with that curse you have, I just don't understand. You're the only person I can imagine who has ever had a chance to see everything from both sides of the world and know for sure what you are and what you're not."
"Look! I like girls and only girls! End of story! Can ya move on to some real questions now?!"
"Okay. So tell me straight. What is my sister to you? Do you even like her? As a girl?"
"I, well, uh…."
She groaned in exasperation as the thalamus and pre-central regions of his 18-year-old supratentorial sponge fizzled and short-circuited, leaving him withering and regressing back into his old pattern of infantile incoherence over matters concerning the opposite sex. Unlike all the other times when she had watched this familiar B-rated scene play out, however, a strange revelation came to her as she thought back on their earlier conversation about unconscious biases. As she studied him standing by the window helplessly twiddling a chicken bone between his thumbs, she came to a decision. She realized that she needed, even wanted, him to trust her.
"Let's have some ground rules going forward. To make us both a little more comfortable."
She presented him with a very simple and square proposal.
First, what he said with regards to Akane would stay between them – unless, of course, the matter became an issue of dishonorable or malicious intent. To make everything transparent and fair, the same would apply to what she told him about her sister too.
Second, he had to answer her questions honestly to the best of his ability. In return, she would give him her honest appraisal and without regard for how hard the words might be to hear.
Third, he did not have to agree with her opinions or her advice. However, he had to tell her if he disagreed and why. Similarly, she could not coerce or trick him into saying or doing anything. She could only entreat and try to persuade.
Fourth, no hard feelings should come between them regardless of what happened between him and Akane. The entire matter should remain an objective business affair.
"That's it. How does that sound?"
"I, uh…. why? How can I be sure this ain't just the beer or your sleep deprivation talkin'? Don't ya at least want something back for all this?"
She smiled. Maybe he was right to some degree about the alcohol and her lack of sleep. Still, even those things could not make a person say things they did not honestly mean.
"You were listening in on me with Kasumi the other day, right? It's like what I said. I think my Mom would be disappointed with the way things are and what we've become. No matter how much Akane pisses me off sometimes, Kasumi and I are supposed to look after her, and I think you can be good for her. I always thought that."
"Why?"
She shrugged. "Don't know. Just a feeling."
"That don't make sense. Nabiki Tendou always has a reason."
"Honest, Ranma. Sometimes, for a girl, a feeling is reason enough. Last I checked, I'm still a girl."
"Okay. But I still think I owe ya something in return."
"Oh, yes, but that's a separate matter."
"Whaddaya want?"
"Well, other than for Akane to finally mature and get her life straightened out, just two little things."
"Okay…."
"The things I do with my life here in Meguro are my business. You don't go back to Nerima and talk to anyone about what you see and hear. That includes Kasumi."
"Fair. The other?"
She eyed the unfinished sketch and the drawing pencils still splayed out on her bed and delighted in watching him cringe as he followed her eyes. "From now on, you're going to willingly help me make some money to fund my agendas. I'll tell you what those are on a need-to-know basis."
"Uh, nothin' dishonest or dishonorable, okay?"
Nabiki laughed. "Funny you say that. Whatever you may think, I've never been dishonest or done anything dishonorable with you or even any of those fools back in Nerima."
He glared back at her with narrowed, suspicious eyes. "Sellin' pictures of both my forms to the Kuno siblings back when ya were still at Furinkan? Or stirring up fights so ya could set up betting pools? Ain't any of that dishonest or dishonorable?"
"On my mother's grave, I promise you that what I've said is true," she answered with a straight, solemn expression. "None of that was stuff you couldn't handle, and no harm ever came to anyone. I can't be responsible for everyone else's mistaken assumptions and inferences, and too often Life forces you to select a bad choice from only bad choices. A lot of growing up means realizing that's just the way things are. Anyway, you keep your end of our deal, and I'll keep mine. That sound okay to you?"
To demonstrate her sincerity, she stood, walked around to his side of the desk, and reached across her chest with her right hand to release her dominant arm from the sling. A flash of pain tore through her shoulder as she did. She fought back and extended her left hand to him.
Ranma, clearly panicking, shot to his feet and moved toward her. "Nabiki…!"
"I'm fine," she lied as she grasped at her left elbow with her right hand to steady herself. For added effect, she threw him the warmest, most inviting smile that she could manage. "Do we have a deal?"
"O-okay," he said as he reached out and took her hand in his. "Deal."
"Good," sighing with relief as he helped her place her arm back in the sling. "So now, let's try this again, yes? Do you like my sister?"
"I, well — "
"The unvarnished, uncensored truth, Ranma," she reminded him. "Forget even about honor, duty, and everyone else's views and assumptions for a moment. Do you or do you not?"
Of course, she knew that her question was merely rhetorical, but even then, a confession from him would still be an important milestone. The actual answer that Nabiki received, however, shattered her entire view on Ranma and Akane's dysfunctional relationship. She could not recall the last time anyone had so completely caught her off guard. With her confidence in her ability to read people again shaken for the second time that evening, she had to sit down.
"Can you… can you say that again?"
"Told ya, I honestly ain't sure. Akane definitely ain't bad lookin', but spending my whole life with someone just 'coz of how they look ain't exactly a smart or right thing to do. I need more in order to answer your question."
"I…. I don't understand. You've lived in our home for over 3 years now."
He reached over to Nabiki's bed and carefully picked up the unfinished self-portrait she had been working on with the Komei School child. "Maybe that's another unconscious bias talkin'?" he remarked as he studied the sketch.
"I…. I guess so," Nabiki admitted, genuinely chagrined. "Maybe you should explain it to me."
He sighed. Their parents, his other iinazukes, and rivals had been breathing down their necks from the day he and Akane had gotten engaged, trying to dictate and manipulate every single one of their thoughts and actions toward one another. As a result, he never had the opportunity to spend time getting acquainted with Akane as a boy normally would.
"That's the real reason nothin' can move forward as ya put it. Other than that she also believes in the principles of the Art, can't cook, has an anger management problem, gets jealous of everyone and everything, and that yellow is her favorite color, I really dunno much else."
Nabiki finally understood. "You want to date her — as in like a normal boy asking a girl out. That's why you want my help."
He nodded. "Yeah. Something like that, but if I went to her directly as things stand now, she'd clobber me on the assumption that I've got some perverted motive 'fore I can even finish what I wanna say. Ya know how suspicious she gets. That and if our fathers even caught the slightest wind of my intentions, we'd end up at an altar before sunset. Would make this whole discussion moot."
Nabiki nodded. He had a point.
Just then, however, the toll of the last few days on her body decided to declare itself. A deep yawn overcame her, compelling her to concede, despite how strange and interesting the evening had been, that fighting to keep her eyes open was becoming incredibly difficult. Collapsing and hibernating for the rest of the week seemed like a deliciously appealing idea. Her burn wound itched again too after her little maneuver just now. She needed to change the bandage before she could turn in.
She glanced at the wall clock above her door.
2200.
The snow outside her window had only grown heavier since they came from Setagaya. The last outbound train would come and go soon as well. Akane likely was already fuming imagining the worst about his whereabouts. Nabiki could only imagine the hell that awaited Ranma whenever he made it back.
"You should go home, Ranma-kun. I'll do some thinking. We can continue this conversation again soon."
"I, uh…. Thanks, Nabiki. For hearin' me out tonight and… Merry Christmas."
"Sure. I… I guess I should also say thanks. For helping me home and all. Merry Christmas to you too, Ranma.""
He gave her a warm, earnest grin. This, however, quickly dissolved into flummoxed consternation as he appeared to realize something.
"What?" she asked.
"Uh, how will I hear from you…?"
Regardless of how interesting or pleasant the bizarre evening turned out to be, some things simply could not be allowed to change. Nabiki pounced on the opportunity like oxygen at the summit of Everest and gleefully brandished one of her trademark smirks at him.
"Well, I'd urge you to consider delivering me a new phone at your earliest convenience. I understand the fruit company has just come out with a new model. Midnight blue is an available color option…."
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CHAPTER NOTES:
(1) Christmas is a secular holiday in Japan, a country where less than 1% of the population identifies as Christian. In 1974, KFC Japan launched a "Kentucky for Christmas" marketing campaign portraying eating fried chicken as an elegant, authentic way to celebrate the holiday in true American style. The messaging proved incredibly successful, and ever since, a fried chicken meal has become a unique Japanese Christmas tradition. KFC Japan's busiest day is usually December 24, on which sales are 5-10x more than on typical days.