[DISCLAIMER]

KAISERNEKO: The following is a non-profit fan-based parody. DragonBall, DragonBall Z, and DragonBall GT are all owned by FUNimation, Toei Animation, Fuji TV, and Akira Toriyama. Please support the official release.

(scene shows Kami's spaceship arriving on Planet Namek)

NARRATOR: So, after seven hundred and thirty-one grueling galactic weeks of travel(Oracle: What kind of time measurement is that!?/ Paint: Shiva Samba, if you had a child what would you call it?/ Shiva Samba: Well if I had a son I would call him Cerve-/ Paint: Sweet Cerve, we just started the episode!)—or one month (Oracle: You know what, I'm not gonna question this anymore.) if you never watched "Men in Black"—our *ahem* "heroes" (Shakara: Heh, heroes./ Fardie: I know right?) have finally arrived on Planet Namek. Where the sky is green, the grass is blue, and it's boring as s**t.

"And it's also opposite Earth." Virus stated, "What? ...Wait... Oh my it is..." Anomaly realized, "I'm not sure I follow." Puria admitted, "Hold on..." Oracle said as she took a picturee of the scenery and swapped the grass's and sky's color, "Seriously, were you high when you made some stuff?" Tauira asked Shiva Samba who replied "Maybe I actually was, cause I don't remember."

KRILLIN: Hey, Gohan, check it out. Blue grass. What do you think their favorite kind of music is? Huh? Huh?

"...Music?" Hatsu asked, "Yeah, this has got me stumped." Nightmare King admitted, "What does music have to do with anything?" Shakara questioned.

GOHAN: R&B...?

KRILLIN: Huh. You're really sheltered, aren't you?

"Have you seen him up until now?" Jo'on asked sarcastically.

GOHAN: I had to read an entire book about peach farming on the way here. (Jo'on: I wasn't expecting that...) You tell me.

KRILLIN: Well... hey! We're on Namek now! (Nezumi: Thank you, we couldn't tell! Really!) Bulma, got the Dragon Radar?

BULMA: Right here! We're already picking up four Dragon Balls!

Puria giggled at that, "I know what she means, but she still hasn't picked any ball up." She explained the humor, "Much less her boyfriend's." Thinner added making some snicker and other chuckle.

KRILLIN: See? Now we just have to find them, wish our friends back, and head on home!

"I can feel my ears tingle." Fardie informed, "What?" Shion asked, "She feels that war is coming." The other three horsemen broke down.

BULMA: Hey Krillin, is that a Saiyan ship?

(A space pod is seen flying above Krillin)

"Aahh..." Shion let out in understanding.

KRILLIN: (notices the space pod) Huh?

GOHAN: I think I sense Vegeta.

"Who else would it be?" Dreamiv asked in his sleep, "It- wait he's still asleep..." Paint realized.

KRILLIN: (sounding more frightened) Huh?

BULMA: Oh, and now those four Dragon Balls are on the move.

"That's not good!" Starrow noted.

KRILLIN: AAAAAAAAAAAAA-

"And that's the reasonable response!" Hatsu continued.

[OPENING SEQUENCE]

(scene shifts Vegeta's space pod landing on Namek, with Vegeta emerging from the crater and holding a scouter)

KRILLIN: (in background) -AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA-

"Wow those are some good lungs." Zettai complimented, "...Are you okay?" Dreamiv asked, actually having waken up at what his daughter said, "Uh?" Zettai let out in confusion, "No seriously are you okay?" Paint agreed with her husband, "Why wouldn't I be?" Zettai asked, "Because you never compliment anyone." Paint and Dreamiv explained, only leaving Zettai like, 'are you serious?'

VEGETA: Ahhh... good to be back at a hundred percent again. (Lemus: Good for you anyways.) (puts on his scouter) Augh, I just got here and this planet's already annoying me. (Lemus: And that's not good for anyone else.) (sees another space pod approaching Namek) Wait a minute, is that Cui's pod? (Nezumi: Oh so fishlips followed...) (begins to walk forward) Well, I better go take care of this.

KRILLIN: -AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! (gasps for breath)

GOHAN: Ya done, Krillin?

"He better be, my ears are starting to ring." Oracle stated.

KRILLIN: Yeah... I'm good.

FRIEZA SOLDIER 1: Hey! What's that over there?

KRILLIN: AAAAAAAAAAAAA- (continues to scream in the background)

"Shut up!" Oracle ordered, "Never have I seen you so mad..." Thinner commented.

FRIEZA SOLDIER 2: In the name of Frieza, we demand that you stop!

"OOoohhh... They're already here..." Jo'on winced, "That explains the feeling I had." Fardie understood.

KRILLIN: -AAAAAAHHHHH! Wait, haven't I heard that name before?

"Yeah, when all those guys commited su1cide." Virus remembered.

FRIEZA SOLDIER 2: Alright, stay where you are and we'll shoot you.

"Wait, that's wrong." Lemus noticed, "I think they just want to kill them." Takama deduced.

KRILLIN: Don't you mean "Or we'll shoot you?"

"That is the correct one." Lemus commented.

FRIEZA SOLDIER 2: We know what we said! (Takama: And I was right!) (fires a shot at the spaceship, with Bulma jumping out of the way)

TOILET: Nein!

"NOOOOOO! Toilet!" Shiva Samba cried out in face dismay, causing everyone to burst out laughing at the hilarity of it.

(Bulma manages to avoid the explosion, but the spaceship is now immobilized as it has a visible hole, causing the front window to crack)

KRILLIN: Huh. Well there goes our ship.

"Don't be so nonchalante about losing your only ride!" Avaritia scolded.

BULMA: (off-screen) What the f**king hell?!

"Yeah I expected Krillin to do that!" Avaritia explained.

FRIEZA SOLDIER 1: Damn, man, you couldn't hit the broad side of a space barn.

"Wait he does that too?" Puria blanked, "Yeah there's a part of space that just adds space in front of everyday things." Starrow explained, "That's lazy." Nightmare King commented, "I know." Starrow agreed.

FRIEZA SOLDIER 2: Yeah, well, that's only because I'm too busy hitting the broad side of your mom! (Hatsu: How creative.../ Fardie: Picking up you used that line before./ Hatsu: And some variants.) (gets punched by Gohan) Gah! My face!

(Krillin kicks the other soldier, making him collide with the soldier Gohan attacked and into a lake)

"I thought they didn't want to kill anyone?" Virus brought up confused, "Yeah?" Takama replied in equal confusion, "Aren't those two going to drown?" Virus pointed out, "Yeah, fun isn't it?" Takama said.

KRILLIN: Hah! Looks like they're all... washed up! (Takama: And that's less fun./ Starrow: Yeah that was an incredible stretch./ Avaritia: Coming by you of all people.) (Gohan gives a blank stare) Yeaaaaaaaahhhhh... da da da da da, oh...

(Krillin Owned Count: 11)

"There it is!" Those who knew of the owned counter clapped in delight, "It's actully a thing!?" Jo'on, Shion, Puria and Fardie exclaimed, "Yep! And it doesn't make an ounce of sense!" Hatsu confirmed.

BULMA: I can't believe this... We're stranded on an alien planet... It's like "Pitch Black" only our Vin Diesel is a total bitch...

"I uhhhh... What?" Dreamiv said, "I don't know." Jo'on said back.

KRILLIN: It might be best if we get ourselves out of the open. (Fardie: Wow, actually decent warfare strategy./ Puria: Are you actually impressed?/ Fardie:No.) (notices a cave) Hey, look, a cave! (points towards the cave) See Bulma, isn't this nice? A nice dark, dank... cave?

"Maybe..." Takama wondered.

(the cave is heard making a roaring noise)

"Definetly not." She threw away.

BULMA: Who knows? Maybe here I'll finally meet a real man.

"Is this where she falls for Vegeta?" Thinner asked, "Probably not." Shakara shook her head, "Could be though, they're both here." Tauira brought up, "Fifty-fifty." Shakara offered, "Deal." Tauira shook on it.

KRILLIN: What about Yamcha?

BULMA-Dreamiv: A real man...

GOHAN: Hey, uh, Krillin, do you feel that?

KRILLIN: What? The need to pee? (Takama: Definetly not.) Well they destroyed the toilet so I guess I'll just use a bush or... (sees something flying in their direction) OH, MY GOD, GET IN THE CAVE!

"What's going on exactly? How is Krillin taking this much initiative?" Lemus questioned, "Fear does miracles sometimes." Puria explained.

(a large group of soldiers fly past Krillin and co., who are hiding in a nearby cave)

"Well, that's an army if I ever saw one." Shakara stated, "You're telling me..." Fardie responded.

GOHAN: Krillin! They have the Dragon Balls!

"Is that Freeza? I think it's Freeza." Nezumi suggested, "Probably." Takama agreed, "They're f*cked, straight up." Jo'on summed up.

KRILLIN: Yes, Gohan, I noticed.

GOHAN: Did you feel their power levels? They were as strong as Vegeta!

"That's even worse!" Starrow exclaimed, "Could be much worse honestly." Lemus corrected.

KRILLIN: Yes, Gohan, I noticed!

GOHAN: But that one guy at the front, he was like a hundred Vegetas...

"Okay it is Freeza." Nezumi nodded, "Is that worse?" Starrow asked Lemus and he replied "Much."

KRILLIN: YES, GOHAN, I NOTICED! On the bright side, I no longer have to pee anymore! (Thinner: What's the word for this?/ Oracle: Disgusting?/ Thinner: No that's not it.../ Shion: Vile?/ Thinner: Yeah, that's it!) Lemme go change in the cave...

(shows a time card that says "10 Minutes Later". Krillin is seen walking out of the cave and catching his breath)

BULMA: Geez, took you long enough.

"I'll say, 10 minutes to take his pants and underwear off and change it?" Takama realized how much that was.

KRILLIN: We're going after those Dragon Balls.

"Did he also pee his fear out?" Virus asked, "That's literally impossible." Anomaly shook their heads.

BULMA: Whoa, what?

KRILLIN: We may be outmatched... but we didn't come this far just to give up!

BULMA: What the heck happened in that cave?

"That's what I'm trying to figure out." Takama said.

KRILLIN: Something I should have taken care of a month ago. (Tauira: Ohh.../ Nightmare King: Did he-/ Hatsu: Yeah, he definetly did.) (removes his hat)

GOHAN: ...I don't get it.

"Good." Everyone nodded and sighed in relief.

KRILLIN: Come on, Gohan! Bulma, stay here and call Roshi back on Earth. We may need backup. Stay close, Gohan!

"Maybe they should get him h*rny more often if it makes him that brave." Fardie suggested, "While that's funny, I doubt that's it." Avaritia shook her head.

(Krillin and Gohan dash away)

BULMA: Well, I guess I better set up camp then. (runs inside the cave) OH, GOD, IT'S EVERYWHERE!

"Super Soaker!" Shiva Samba cheered and everyone chuckled.

(scene shifts to Kame House with the music "I'm Too Sexy" playing in a radio. A phone rings and Master Roshi answers it.)

"Why!? Why isn't he wearing pants!?" Shion lamented, "I hate that so much!" Jo'on lamented too.

MASTER ROSHI: Kame house, where the beaches are fine and the bitches are finer! (Dreamiv: Where are the b*tches though?/ Shiva Samba: Good question.) Could you speak up? I'm not wearing pants.

"What does- Nevermind." Shakara gave up.

(shifts to Wukong Hospital showing Master Roshi, standing next to a nearby nurse, reporting to Goku about the current situation on Namek)

MASTER ROSHI: And not only is Vegeta on the planet, but apparently someone else is there, even stronger than him! So in short, s**t be wack, yo!

"And he's telling him." Zettai facepalmed, "I detect a 99.9% probability of him screwing up somewhere." Oracle calculated, "Big surprise..." Paint said sarcastically.

GOKU: Fo' shizzle, Master Rizzle! (Hatsu: I give up with these references.) I can't do anything until I'm fully healed though! If only there were a way...

"Has he tried the Senzu?" Nezumi asked, "Wait why didn't they have them against the Sayians?" Fardie wondered out loud, "No clue." Nezumi replied.

YAJIROBE: Hey there, I thought I'd just drop in with these magical Senzu Beans that heal all wounds and restore your stamina.

"So they were explained here... But they- they were in the movies..." Lemus remembered, "That means this episode was made before those movies." Hatsu explained.

GOKU: ...If only there were a way-

MASTER ROSHI-Avaritia-: Take the damn magical beans, Goku!

GOKU: Ooh! Sweet science-y magic!

("Spinach Theme" from "Popeye" plays as Goku eats a Senzu Bean, jumps out of the hospital bed and tears off his bandages)

GOKU: Naked time! (Everyone: NO!) (strips and puts on his fighting gi) All right! 'Kay guys, I'm going to Bulma's place! (Virus: Makes sense so far.) (Yajirobe gives Goku the remaining Senzu Beans) By the way, takin' the beans.

MASTER ROSHI-Everyone-: Krillin?

GOKU: Krillin.

MASTER ROSHI: But... why Bulma's?

"You know, the scientist?" Nightmare King reminded, "Not rocket scientist, they are two different things." Oracle explained, "Oh." Nightmare King let out in understanding.

GOKU: Well, I need a ship, and Bulma's dad's a scientist.

MASTER ROSHI: ...I'm not even gonna begin to go into what is wrong with that... and just wish you good luck!

"Yeah, that's not going to do anything." Avaritia shook her head.

GOKU: Niiiimbuuus! (Zettai: He can fly! Why the cloud!) Later guys! (jumps out the window) Nimbus? (Nezumi: That's... bad.../ Starrow: Not really, he should be strong enough to endure it.) Nimbu- Oh-God-oh-crap-oh-geezus-

(smashes into ground causing a car alarm to go on off-screen.)

"Although that was a pretty hard fall." Starrow winced.

GOKU: (in pain off-screen) I'm okay... (Nimbus can be heard showing up off-screen) Oh... There he is.

"He means he's late." Nezumi translated, "A little too late." Jo'on agreed.

MASTER ROSHI: *sigh*

(scene shifts to Planet Namek with Cui waiting foe Vegeta's arrival)

CUI: (tracking Vegeta with his scouter) Hello there, Vegeta. Fancy meeting you here.

"You stalked him, but fine." Avaritia corrected.

VEGETA: So you followed me? Sure took your sweet time.

"Must be really slow." Virus deduced.

CUI: Well, I could have gotten here sooner, but I stopped on my way to plow YOUR mother!

VEGETA-Everyone-: ...His/My mother's dead.

CUI: I know!

"Die please..." Shiva Samba requested, "Fish lips really should just die now, I really can't take it." Shakara agreed.

VEGETA: ...You know, I'm having trouble remembering, Cui. What's your power level?

"He's going to kill him." Puria stated, "Yeah, we're seeing a corpse today." Fardie agreed.

CUI: Ha! You would forget! 18,000. (Lemus: Must be evenly matched then.) Same as yours, Vegeta.

VEGETA: Funny that. See, I just read my Official Saiyan Handbook (Starrow: So that's a thing.) (holds up said book and starts reading a page) and it says right here "When a Saiyan is beaten to near death, their power level increases immensely."

"And that's cheating." Takama added, "I wonder what counts." Oracle wondered.

CUI: Well I don't see what that has to do with anything-

VEGETA: And while I was down on Earth, oh man, I got destroyed!

"Ohhh..." The more childish viewers let out smugly, "Someone's definetly gonna die." Shakara nodded.

CUI: Ha ha ha! You... What?

VEGETA: Yep. All by a low level warrior, his half-breed son, a midget, and an obese man with a sword. I lost outright.

"Nothing like therapy." Lemus nodded, "Doesn't really work as well as advertised." Oracle replied.

CUI: Why are you telling me this? You never tell anyone this!

VEGETA: Easy. Because I know you'll never tell anybody, Cui.

"And here's his death bed." Shion crossed her arms.

CUI: (bewildered) But... But I hate you! Why would I- (gets blown up by Vegeta) WAAAAAH!

VEGETA: God, I love therapy.

"Told ya." Lemus smiled.

(scene shifts to Zarbon's scouter getting destroyed by detecting Vegeta's power level)

ZARBON: Oh my, I seem to have gone off prematurely.

"Still the walking talking innuendo as the first time we saw him." Anomaly blanked, "I hope he shuts up, it makes me quite uncomfortable." Avaritia grimaced.

DODORIA: Well, hell. Looks like Vegeta just took out Cui. Poor fish-faced bastard.

"AH! They see it too!" Shakara clapped.

ZARBON: Wait, which one was Cui?

"And he wasn't that important." Thinner smirked, "Did he look important?" Puria asked, "No, in fact I didn't say he's important." Thinner clarified.

DODORIA: You remember. Purple guy, hated Vegeta.

ZARBON-Everyone-: Gonna have to be a little more specific.

DODORIA: Reproduced asexually.

ZARBON: Oh, him. (Nightmare King: That's not something I would like to be remembered by!/ Tauira: Who would want to be remembered for that exactly?) Ew! You know I wouldn't have minded so much if he wasn't all up in my face about it. I can only swallow so much.

"Oh my God..." Avaritia lamented, "Why are you so disturbed by this?" Starrow asked, "Remember when we still weren't married how forward you were?" Avaritia reminded, "Oh yeah... Sorry." Starrow apologized.

FRIEZA: Will you two pay attention? (shows a group of Namekians) These innocent bumpkins won't slaughter themselves.

"Alright Killy Billy." Fardie frowned, "Did you come up with that right now?" Lemus asked, "Yes." Fardie answered, "Actually she was waiting for the right moment to say it." Puria smiled as she sold Fardie out and she responded "You traitor!"

ZARBON: Well you might be able to find a way to make them.

FRIEZA: Oooh! That'd be fun! Heeheeheeheeheeheehee!

"Sadistic f*ck." Nezumi insulted.

NARRATOR: A new evil has revealed its face. Who are these mysterious enemies? (Gohan and Krillin are seen surveying the situation on top of a ridge) And do Gohan and Krillin stand a chance? The answer to these questions will be revealed... right now! Zarbon, Dodoria, Frieza, and (camera shows Krillin) ohhh my, no!

"So Popo was right." Hatsu's eyes widened, "Didn't expect that." Shiva Samba raised an eyebrow.

KRILLIN: Wait, what-

[ENDING SEQUENCE]

[STINGER]

(scene shifts to King Kai's planet in Other World)

"Why?" Shakara asked.

KING KAI: Alright, now that you have arrived on my planet we will begin your training. (Shion: Oh they're there!/ Lemus: Why not in Heaven or Hell?/ Shakara-Shiva Samba: *Shrug*) Tenshinhan, Chiaotzu, twenty laps around the planet. Piccolo...

PICCOLO: Go to hell, I'm meditating.

KING KAI: Keep doing that. Yamcha...

YAMCHA: What is it, King Kai? I'm ready for anything!

KING KAI: Wash my car.

"Okay, everyone else gets to train, he's the black sheep!" Dreamiv giggled, "I was expecting that honestly." Oracle admitted.

YAMCHA: Oooh! Like in that movie! Wax on, wax off!

KING KAI: (walks into his house) Yeah, go wax off.

"Nice way to tell him to f*ck off." Fardie complimented, "Couldn't have said it better myself!" Shakara made an okay sign, "Why not just tell him that though?" Puria asked, "Best to be professional." Tauira explained, "This is starting to get out of hand." Avaritia whispered to Shiva Samba, "Don't worry I got the solution." She replied before snapping her fingers.

Out of nowhere four people in sitting positions playing cards appeared, one is small as a dog, her skin very dark with four arms, fur covering said arms and legs, visibly sharp teeth, claws amber eyes and long pelt like hair running all the way down to her feet, the second a little bit taller than Tauira, her body made of metal and very slim, the third has pure white skin wearing a nurse outfit and about as tall as Fardie, the last one easily the tallest, glowing green, with branch like horns, leaves for hair and a weird aura coming off of her.

Still in sitting positions they fell to the ground since there wasn't any chair where they got teleported, but the glowing one didn't fall, but was still as confused as the others, at least until they laid eyes on Shakara, Tauira, Puria and Fardie, they looked at eachother for a moment before all eight of them started screaming.