Chapter 18: Sun's Out Guns Out
In which a trip to the docks turns out to be quite revealing for two Faunus.
"Oh, isn't it just so amazing?"
It really wasn't.
"A time when all the people of the world's come together in a grand moment of unity shared by all four kingdoms."
All the people in the world must not include the Menagerie.
"There's going to be parades, culture, even a grand tournament!"
Time wasters for anyone but children. Hey, maybe Ruby might be able to enjoy it.
"The amount of planning and organization that goes into it makes me so giddy and fills me with such joy!"
Literally what the fucking fuck.
Weiss was practically dancing in the streets. Ruby, Yang, and Blake trailed behind her as the led the way to the docks of Vale. Blake couldn't really find herself getting into the whole celebration, no matter how many streamers were thrown about haphazardly. Still, the docks were where the best fish restaurants were held, and Schnee was buying, so…
As they passed by a Dust shop, the old shopkeeper waved at Ruby, who waved back.
"Someone you know, Rubes?"
"Not really, I just saved his Dust from being stolen by arresting Roman Torchwick."
Blake and Yang already knew the full story, but Weiss, on the other hand, was apparently hearing about this for the first time.
"Wait, that was you? Roman Torchwick has been plaguing my family's Dust shipments for months! No one was able to catch him. We barely even figured out it was him, given how stealthy the thief was."
"Weiss, it was child's play."
"That's fitting, as you are in fact a child."
"How did you not know this? It's how I got into Beacon so early and guaranteed Yang 'n' me would be partners."
"Yang and I, Ruby."
"No, it's how I guaranteed Yang 'n' me would be partners, not Yang 'n' you, Weiss. Are you feeling okay? Did the Grimm hit you on the head?"
"Ruby, you were the one that got hit on the head by it."
The two continued on in this fashion for some time. It was a blessing for Team Rainbow that they weren't partners. Weiss probably would've snapped and murdered the team in their sleep.
When they arrived, her mental image of the docks was shattered. Instead of a paradise of tuna, cod, and herring, it turned out to be little more than a dirty, mucky line of shacks and warehouses. The entire place smelled like seawater, causing Blake to wrinkle her nose in disgust. She hated the ocean, and no, it was not because she was a cat, you racist. It was because she'd spent so much time in her youth on a small island. To her, waves and beaches were a sign of the barriers that humans used to keep Faunus far, far away from them.
"We're here!"
"Weiss, just why," Blake stated. She didn't ask it; she stated it.
"As representatives of Beacon Academy, it is our duty to greet the new arrivals from other schools as they arrive."
"You just want us to spy, don't you? Give ourselves the competitive edge when the Vytal Tournament comes around?"
"No."
"Then why are you taking pictures of the newcomers on your scroll?" inquired Ruby.
"N-No reason. Look, there they are!"
Blake did her best to feign interest. Spying on teenagers wouldn't be necessary to win the tournament – she was fairly confident that, between her and the other three girls, they would pack more than enough of a punch. Either way, she wanted to avoid Weiss' nagging, so she spared a glance.
There was probably at least four Atlesian teams with matching military uniforms marching out of a boat. Poor brainwashed kids. Some students from Vacuo strolled off their vessel at a leisurely pace. Blake couldn't help but smile as the students perfectly captured the attitudes and styles of the Kingdoms from which they hailed.
One particular Mistralian team stood out to Blake. A dark skinned teen with emerald-green hair, a petit black haired woman with a parasol to shield her from the sun, a tall–
"Hey, stop that Faunus!"
Blake's full attention shot to the Faunus in question. A monkey Faunus with a bloated stomach peeled a banana as he hung upside down with his tail from a lamppost that was bending under his weight. Two sailors below him were trying to jump up and grab him, but he pulled himself just out of reach eat time.
"If you hadn't wanted me to stow away on your ship, you shouldn't have brought so many snacks? How could I have resisted the buffet? Man, I must've gained 20, no 30 pounds on that cruise."
"You ate our entire trip's worth of rations! We had to eat the leather in our shoes to survive!"
"Did you try fishing?"
"We…um…just get down from there!"
"Sounds like it's time I made like this banana…" – the Faunus dropped the banana peel on the sailor's face – "and split!"
With his pursuers distracted, the Faunus vaulted off his lamppost perch towards Team Rainbow. The lamppost, now bereft of an overweight Faunus, shot backwards and rattled around like a spring. As the Faunus flipped over the railing between them and the boardwalk, he winked at Blake.
Then, a golden gauntlet decked him in the face.
"Vale's only big enough for one pun-cracking blonde!" Yang's eyes were red in rage, but without having taken any damage she couldn't activate her semblance. Nonetheless, she proudly stood over here defeated foe and placed a boot on his back. "No more monkeying around for you, friend!"
"I yield. And I promise not to make any more puns!"
Purple eyes returned. Yang grabbed the Faunus by the scruff of his neck, hauled him to his feet, and dusted off his shoulders. "Glad we've reached an understanding. It looks like I won't have to spank the monkey."
Gambol Shroud was looking miiiiiighty friendly right about now. She could easily draw it and kill Yang. Or herself. Both would solve the problem.
"Sun's the name – Sun Wukong. Leader of Team SSSN, or Team Social Security Number!"
For the first time, Blake got a good look at him. His blonde hair reminded her of the leader of Team Adventure, as did his sugary smile. He wore a–
She rushed to cover Ruby's eyes, but Yang beat her to it.
Yang coughed. "Um, Sun, your outfit choice seems to be slightly inappropriate for a public venue. Have you considered covering up a bit more when in public?"
"And let ladies miss their chance to see the goods? Not happening – no closed shirts for this guy! Sun's out guns out!" He flexed his muscles.
"Sun, I meant that your fly is down," clarified Yang.
"Sun's out guns out!"
"And you don't seem to be wearing underwear," added Blake.
"Sun's out guns out!"
The sailors finally finished ascending the stairs and grabbed Sun. "Gotcha! Wait until the police hear about this!"
"C'mon, fellas. We don't really need to involve the PoPo, do we?"
Out of the blue, Weiss let loose a hearty laugh. Everyone turned to look at her. "Oh, it's too much! Father would be having an aneurysm by now."
"Lady, this guy stowed away without a ticket and stole our entire–"
"Is that why you're turning him over to the police? Because he snuck aboard your ship and ate your lunches? Here." Weiss pulled a wallet out of her dress (sorry, her combat skirt) and brought out a hefty stack of lien. "This ought to cover whatever you lost and then some."
The men took the money, inspected it for tricks, then released Sun when they couldn't find any.
"Well, don't let it happen again," one cried out as they turned back to walk to their ship. Actually, they ran to their ship, which was now drifting away into the open ocean since neither had properly moored it to the dock.
"Gee, you really saved my butt! To whom should I address the thank you note, ma'am?"
"Weiss Schnee. And it's no problem. Money is no object for me."
Sun froze for less than a second, then thanked Weiss again and wandered off. It was so brief that Blake would not have noticed it if she hadn't been expecting it. Faunus tended to expect the worst from the family that owned the most discriminatory company in the world. Blake herself certainly had gone into Beacon expecting Weiss to be a little shit. Instead, she was…something else. Blake still wasn't sure.
Once Sun was gone, Weiss snickered again. "Oh, my stars! Turning a monkey over to the police for eating all their bananas! Ha ,what a silly idea. That's the kind of thing I would expect from Ruby, not two adults. Vale is downright bizarre."
Blake looked at her team. The sisters were just as uncomfortable as she was. Weiss continued on, oblivious. "Oh, the way he let everything hang out in the open – what a funny little monkey! That would've never been allowed in stuffy old Atlas. This kingdom may be weird, but I'm glad I came here."
Yang cautiously asked, "Hey, Weiss. Um. How do you, ya know, feel about the Faunus?"
Weiss smiled at her, slightly confused. "I simply love Faunus, Yang. Why do you ask?"
"It's just that, the way you talk down to them …it might come across as rude," said Ruby. "I'm sure you don't mean it." Blake wasn't.
"Oh, come on, you two. It's not like they would understand it."
"W-Weiss, what do you think the Faunus are?"
"Well, scientifically, they are a species of animals with humanoid characteristics."
Animals with humanoid…
Oh Dust, she had it so backwards. Ruby and Yang exchanged a glance, then began to alternate asking questions.
"Weiss, Faunus aren't animals. They have feelings."
"All animals have feelings, Ruby. You said you have a pet dog; you should know this."
"They can speak!"
"Yes, Faunus can speak and are among the smartest species of animal on Remnant. The scientific community ascribes higher intelligence to them than dolphins or even primates."
"How do you feel about the White Fang?"
"The white what? Yang, is that one of your stupid boy bands? You know I don't listen to that garbage."
"Weiss, do you hate Faunus?"
"What?! No, I told you, I've always loved Faunus. I used to even give treats to some of them in the mines when I was younger. What is it with these incessant questions?"
Ruby and Yang's interrogation was going nowhere, so Blake decided to step in. "Weiss, you know that Faunus live alone on Menagerie? W–they've got a government, a culture, everything the human kingdoms have…"
"Oh, I know. It warms my heart to know that there's still a place on Remnant where those sweet creatures can roam freely in the wild."
It was too much to hear her childhood home spoken of like some sort of…of…wildlife preserve. Blake broke. "You bitch! How dare you!"
"Blake, what is wrong with you?"
"How dare you speak of the Faunus so poorly? You, whose family abuses them for cheap labor!"
"Wh– okay, you've got me there. The SDC does have several beasts of burden working in the mines. Personally, I've always campaigned to Father for them to be treated more humanely, but he never listens to me. He never listens to me about anything, though."
More humanely. She didn't even understand why it was wrong to say that. Nothing Blake said could get through this idiotic bitch's thick skull, and she wasn't sure it was even worth trying to correct her.
Of course, there was one surefire way to convince Weiss of the error of her ways.
Well, the bow had to come off before the Vytal Festival, so now was as good a time as any. Blake reached up to her head and tugged on the ribbon. It unraveled and floated to the ground.
"Weiss, I'm a Faunus."
Weiss stared at Blake
Blake stared at Weiss.
Weiss ran.
Omake
Sun: Check out my massive pole, ladies. *reaches down*
Blake: NO!
Yang: YES!
Weiss: I'm into girls.
Sun: *unclips staff from belt* It can switch into nun-chucks and even a gun.
Ruby: Now that's the kind of pole I'm into!
Omake 2
Sun: You saved me. Why?
Weiss: Mmm. Monkey.
Next Chapter: Salutations – A new friend! Sensational!