Paint and Powder

A Star Trek anthology by Andrew Joshua Talon

DISCLAIMER: This is a non-profit fan based work of prose. Star Trek: The Next Generation, Deep Space Nine, Voyager et al are the property of CBS Television, and creation of Gene Roddenberry. Please support the official release.

THE WORLD TURNED UPSIDE DOWN

2375 - The Dominion War

Written by jhosmer1

"Ambassador? We're arriving at the point designated in the treaty." Ensign M'rews swallowed nervously. The Caitian had just graduated from the Academy a year ago, and that had been accelerated due to the Dominion War. Now he was addressing one of the most decorated members of Starfleet. As her aide, no less!

The woman sitting in the ready room put down the book she was reading (an actual book?) and smiled at him, one hand reaching up to stroke her silver hair back from her face. "Thank you, Ensign," she said, a serene smile on her face. As she stood up, she pouted slightly. "You don't have to call me Ambassador, you know. When we're... alone, you can call me Yorktown."

Ensign M'rews was glad that his kind did not have the blush reaction of furless humanoids, unaware that his tail had frozen still and its hair was standing on end. "I couldn't do that, ma'am!"

When her smile grew wider and less serene, he quickly stuttered an apology and stepped back out of the room.

Yorktown was shaking her head ruefully when the holo-emitters in the room flared to life and the avatar of the ship, the Achilles-class USS Taarna, appeared. The Andorian female twitched an antenna at her fellow shipgirl.

"Oh, don't be that way, Taarna," Yorktown said. "I was only teasing the boy. She straightened out the white Starfleet uniform she was wearing, the still unofficial design she and the other shipgirls had proposed for an AI division to Starfleet. It was strange, having actual clothes on a physical body. She stretched in a way that would have sent M'rews running if he had not already fled.

Taarna shook her head.

"Don't be like that. I've spent time with you in Constable Odo's cells after a night at Quark's."

Now Taarna pouted visibly.

Yorktown held up her hands in defeat. "OK, OK, I apologize." She looked out the window of the ready room at the stars. They had dropped out of warp, but no planets or stars were visible. She could identify the local system's star but only because of her link to astrometrics. "Has your captain contacted them?"

Taarna nodded.

"Let's be about this, then," Yorktown said. She strode through the doors of the room and onto the Taarna's bridge.

Captain Atohr Ch'shroriss turned and twitched an antenna apologetically. "Ambassador," he greeted her. "They have not responded."

"Of course they didn't," Yorktown said. "But we had to make the attempt." She stood straight and tall before the viewscreen. "Put me on," she ordered, then began to speak. "Sheliak Corporate, this is Ambassador Yorktown of the United Federation of Planets. Per Paragraph 653 Subparagraph 9 of the Treaty of Armens, we are entitled to consultation with a representative of the Corporate."

For a moment, there is silence on the bridge, then the communications panel beeped.

"They are hailing us, Captain," the human officer at the station said.

Yorktown winked impishly at the Captain, then turned serious again as the viewscreen filled with the mucous-covered "face" of a Sheliac.

"Speak, human" the Sheliak said.

"I am not a human," Yorktown said. "I am an artificial intelligence, bound to a silicone computing core. I was present at the negotiation of the Treaty of Armens and am a primary signatory."

The Sheliak seemed to hesitate at this. "Your identity is confirmed. What is your purpose, Ambassador Yorktown?"

Off camera, Taarna and Captain Ch'shroriss traded amazed antenna twitches.

Yorktown continued, "Per Paragraph 329, subparagraph 3, I am informing you that the Federation has entered a state of war with your neighbor, the Breen Confederacy. As the Breen have damaged a primary Federation planet, i.e. Earth, per Paragraph 330, subparagraph 4, the Federation will be requiring the Sheliac Corporate to provide aid, intelligence, and passage to our warships. Otherwise, per Paragraph 231, subparagraph 9, we will consider the Sheliac to be allies of the Breen Confederacy and therefore subject to our war with the Dominion and its allies as a hostile state. I will await your reply within the standard time period. End Transmission."

"Wait! There is no need-" the Sheliac began, but then the screen cut off.

Yorktown gave a little fist pump. "I've been waiting 120 years to do that to those officious pettifogging bureaucrats!"

"What just happened?" Captain Ch'shroriss asked. "I knew we were coming to ask the Sheliac what they knew about the Breen. I didn't expect you to demand they ally with us."

"Sorry about that, Captain," Yorktown said. "As to what happened... well, I was the ship that held 372 Federation lawyers back in 2255 when we spent 6 months writing out the 500,000 word Treaty of Armens. I had so many drafts in my memory that my engineer reported I needed to defrag it afterward! Because of that, I asked to be one of the signers of the Treaty. Well, that gave me some small rights under it. Another thing was that I may have let the Sheliac slip in a bit where the Federation might have to help them if the Breen ever attacked their home system, and then insisted on wording that made it a reciprocal agreement."

"You turned a treaty against the Sheliac?" Captain Ch'shroriss said, amazed.

"And if they think that's bad, wait until they reread the section about what aid they're required to give," Yorktown said. "That might have been worded so that it's slightly more damaging to them than us."

"Remind me to never play Fizzbin with you, Ambassador," Captain Ch'shroriss said with an antenna twitch of respect.

Taarna held up a fist and took a bump from Yorktown.

Yorktown smiled broadly and then took Ensign M'rews by the arm. "Now, let them wait for the next, oh, 316 minutes, and then we'll listen to their reply. Ensign, why don't we go tour the arboretum?"

"But, there's only a hydroponics bay-" the Ensign began before he was dragged into the turbolift and the door shut behind them.

Taarna just shook her head woefully.

Author's Note: As had been said before, Yorktown's pretty nice, but she's no saint. Don't get on her bad side.

The Sheliac are from The Ensigns of Command a third season episode of TNG. Picard turned the infamous Treaty of Armens against them, and AndrewJTalon wrote HERE that Yorktown was involved in writing that same treaty. Memory Beta says they're near the Breen, and AndrewJTalon has had prompts lately of Yorktown being involved in diplomacy... so here is how Yorktown handles diplomacy.

Shipgirl Bio: USS Taarna

Following the successful awakening of the AI for the USS Enterprise in 2248, the United Federation of Planets became extremely interested in expanding their roster of Artificial Intelligences. Eventually, the Daystrom Institute and Memory Alpha became the major creators of "ship girls," but there were several groups who eagerly experimented with the technology.

One was the Andorian Assembly of Applied Sciences. Perhaps regretting that they had rejected Val'kem Rev's proposal to create the first black box, they created a test bed out of a Loknar-class frigate, the USS Taarna.

SIDEBAR: The Loknar-class

Before the creation of the United Federation of Planets, its future members had each created their own culture of ship-building. The Vulcans had the best warp drives, the Tellarites had the most robust engineering, the Andorians had the best defenses. After its founding, Starfleet hoped to capitalize on this by enlisting its member states to submit ship designs. The Andorians create the Loknar-class frigate, a fast-moving ship with impressive shielding and weapons. They were designed for border patrols and played a large role in the Four Years War.

The Andorians installed a "black box" into the Loknar-class Taarna, which was named after both an early Andorian colony and a mythological hero of the historical city-state of Taraak. They input much of their culture and history into the new AI, and used a series of simulations to accelerate her development.

When she awoke in 2251, Taarna took the form of an Andorian female with long-white hair and great tactical aptitude. She was quiet, never speaking two words when none would do, but "exploded" on the Starfleet scene by presenting an extensive critique of Starfleet's defensive plans. She was derided as an armchair tactician with no practical experience, but quickly began to prove her worth when the Four Years War erupted. In the end, she was one of the ships at the Battle of Axanar that fought under the battle plans of Fleet Captain Garth of Izar, whom she idolized.

Following the Four Years War, Taarna was moved to a Miranda-class hull and partook in various war games as the Klingon-Federation Cold War progressed. She resisted transferring to a Constitution variant, preferring smaller more agile ships.

The Treaty of Organia was a shock to her and her mostly Andorian crew, as they had been almost looking forward to showing their tactics against the Klingons. She joined a faction of Federation ship girls that argued for the Federation to improve its military posture, citing such threats as the Gorn and the Tholians, and remained a staunch advocate of smaller ship tactics. Following the V'ger, Genesis, and Cetacean Probe Incidents, however, these tactics fell out of favor at Starfleet, who mostly sponsored fewer and larger ships. What few words Taarna spoke about against this practice fell on deaf ears.

She remained in a updated Miranda-class until the Battle of Wolf 359, where she was forced to witness the death of many good friends, including fellow Miranda Saratoga. She transferred to an Achilles-class hull as part of the post-Borg build up in Starfleet. She later was often stationed at Deep Space Nine during the Dominion War, and developed a deep and lasting friendship with the trader Morn. (They often spent hours at Quarks, talking animatedly to each other, to the shock of other ship girls.)

During the Dominion War, Taarna also obtained a gynoid body, and used that to begin training in the Andorian practice of honor dueling known as the Ushaan. She made a pilgrimage to Andorian and hand mined ore out of the icy mountains there to make her own Ushaan-tor, the ritual weapon/miner's tool used in those duels. She has been working since then on developing her own style of Ushaan fighting that borrows from the martial arts of other species.

She remains a member of Starfleet into the late 24th century and is heavily involved in Starfleet's new MACO Carrier design process.