Callum Rosencranz- Swing Vote D11M
Something wasn't right. I wished I could say something wasn't right about Stevie. No, that was entirely the opposite of the truth. Everything was right about Stevie. Her new body was entirely perfect, without the muscle weakness or spasticity that comes with years of forced wheelchair use and medication cocktails. Even more, her new body was entirely untouched by her mother, and I could see the way she reveled in this new purity. Sometimes she seemed distracted or morose, but that was to be expected from someone who'd been through what we had. No, aside from the trauma that was inevitable from the Games, Stevie was doing great. It was me who was different.
I couldn't put my finger on when it started. When I first noticed it, I'd thought at the time that I'd noticed it before. It was only on reflection that I realized it was the first time I'd consciously thought about how things seemed to have changed in my thoughts about her. I'd thought we must have been getting distracted by other things, since it had been hours since I'd seen her and I hadn't even thought of her. We'd been practicing different things in the training room, and meeting with our mentors. Everyone spent some time apart in the Capitol, even allies. It seemed like it had been longer than it really had, though. Stevie and I had gotten together an hour ago for a movie night, but we weren't talking much. It didn't seem weird- we were just chilling next to each other on the couch, contented- but usually we launched into conversation as soon as we saw each other. We always had a hundred things to say to each other. We didn't really just sit together in silence. It seemed normal, but for us it wasn't.
I reached a hand over to lay it on her thigh, then dropped it onto the couch without really knowing why. I just suddenly had the fear that it if I did, it wouldn't feel the same. I studied Stevie's face in profile- the light from the movie flickering on her cheeks and reflecting in her eyes, turned away from me as she watched super-spy Artemisia Glow evade her pursuers. She looked as beautiful as ever. I enjoyed looking at that beauty. But there was some new void in it.
I'm falling out of love with her. I'd been trying to keep the thought away, but it kept knocking at my mind, screaming for me to stop ignoring it. It was silly of me to jump straight to that, of course. Trust someone as silly as me to think I'd somehow gone from head over heels in love to feeling nothing over the single day I'd noticed my fears. No, that wasn't possible. It was just a passing funk, probably from the stress of the Games. Tomorrow I'd wake up and everything would be fine.
Unless it wasn't. Unless we'd only bonded over trauma and now the illusion was falling apart. Unless I was a terrible boyfriend who abandoned Stevie after I promised I'd love her forever. I'd wake up tomorrow and just feel nothing, like I was sleeping next to a mannequin. Stevie would die again in the Arena and I'd feel nothing, because she was the only worthwhile thing in my world and I'd abandoned her.
I reached out jerkily and laid my hand on Stevie's leg. She smiled a little and put her hand on mine without looking away from the screen. I felt the warmth of her hand and told myself this was normal, this was right. I was just catastrophizing, just being a silly teenager. Feelings came and went, but love didn't die just like that. One of us might, but not our love.
Stevie Pagett- Swing Vote D11F
If there was ever a time for me to have a wild-child phase, this was it. One could say my wild-child phase was covered by me murdering my mother, but that was beside the point. It was also something I just really didn't want to think about. Mom was gone and thinking about what happened wouldn't change things. Better to drown it out however I could.
"Ready?" I asked Callum.
"Are you absolutely sure about this?" he asked, crouched on the edge of the roof with his fingers trying to dig into the stone railing, like he could somehow hold himself up with just the pressure.
"What's the worst that can happen? We die?" I asked with a smirk. Below me, tiny people strode up and down the street, some looking up at the Games building, no doubt trying to catch glimpses of Tributes like us. It made my stomach weightless to see how far up we were. My legs strained to lean back and get me out of "danger", but my mind knew better.
"You were never like this back home," Callum grumped.
"Maybe I always wanted to be," I said. It wasn't true, but it could have been. For eighteen years I'd barely even known what I was like. Now I could do anything I wanted, and I guess I just had a lot of teenage rebellion to get out of my system. Callum was lucky I was just jumping off buildings instead of something really crazy, like party drugs.
"I suppose I should go first to make sure it's safe," Callum said, half leaning forward in chivalry and half leaning back in hesitation.
"Better move quick too slow!" I said, launching myself off the side. I felt the forward movement shift sickeningly into free fall and relished the crazy rush. Within seconds I felt the nagging tug, and then I slowed to a stop before slowly rising back on level with the ledge.
"I was gonna go," Callum grumbled.
"Do it, then," I taunted, still catching my breath and feeling my stomach move back into place.
Callum hopped off the edge, smiling a little as the exhilaration took over. He rose back up in front of me and I pecked him on the lips.
"Was it that bad?" I asked.
"It was pretty okay," he said. He opened his arms for a hug. When I went in for it, he jumped backwards off the ledge. We both tumbled down into the force field before floating up in each others' arms.
"You got me good," I said, leaning my head on his chest. After a moment, I looked up.
"You know what would be really crazy?" I asked.
"What?" Callum said, already looking nervous.
I whispered into his ear.
"Right where everyone can see?" he asked, blushing.
"They're so far down. They won't know," I said. I was giddy with how deliciously wild I could be with no one holding me back.
"You really think?"
"I don't know. Do you?"
Chrysolite Astor- Tyger, Tyger D1F
"If we don't, they will." Jacinth's eyes were dark. He looked off into the distance, like he could see all the way to Two.
"I don't know." He couldn't be right. It sounded so dramatic, that Two would keep arming themselves until they could overpower the rest of us. It did look like the Capitol just might let them. They hadn't said anything about the Academy they'd put up. Or the one we'd hastily constructed in response, to be fair. But everyone knew One was the Capitol's favorite District. And Two was their second... maybe they were starting to resent that?
"Look at the way they're slaughtering the others. They don't care at all about life. They kill kids like they're just mowing grass. They'll do that to everyone if no one stops them."
"I guess that does make sense," I admitted.
"So come to the Academy with me! You're so good at sports, you have an advantage! Someone like you could show them we won't back down. If we just give them a fight, they'll see they can't push us around. If they're fighting people their own size instead of starved kids, they'll back down like the cowards they are." Jacinth gestured passionately as he railed against foes partially real and partially imagined.
"I wish no one would fight," I said. I hated the Games, even if we weren't supposed to say that. Blah blah blah, the Capitol was merciful, all that garbage. We may be the Capitol's favorite, but that didn't stop them from taking two of us every year.
Jacinth leaned forward and whispered. "If enough of us get strong enough, one last fight will be all it takes."
I hated how much sense it made. If people like us trained, people like the little kids we lost each year wouldn't have to worry about getting Reaped. We'd protect our privileged status as the Capitol's favorite and keep from being starved like the outliers. We'd hold the line against two and keep the balance of power. And besides, I probably wouldn't even get picked. If I did? Well, wasn't I brave enough to keep someone else home safe? To fight for something worth believing in? Everyone dies someday...
Shale Beecher- Tyger, Tyger D2F
It was several days before I got up the courage to go look for her. It sounded really stupid when I thought of it like that. Courage? To confront someone I'd only heard speak once? I might as well be afraid of a mouse.
I recognized her from behind. It was the way she walked- hands in fists stiff by her side, not swinging with her steps, leaned forward like she was walking into the wind, and storming forward with the speed and intensity of a loan shark. I'd actually thought she was a possible threat when I first saw her. That went out the window within minutes.
"Hey," I called, reaching up a hand.
Cornflower turned around. She saw me and her eyes went wild. She snatched a potted plant off the podium she was walking past and chucked it at me, sprinting off down the hall.
I realized my mistake.
To my astonishment, Calvary sent word that Cornflower was willing to meet me. She named the Games building library as the palaver site. When I got there I saw what she might like in it. The maze of shelves provided quick cover for someone trying to dart away and disappear.
"Sorry I scared you," I said as I pulled out a chair from the long wooden table, carefully picking one at a good distance.
"It's okay. Sorry I threw a plant at you," Cornflower said. She wasn't looking at me, I noticed. She was looking close to me but to the side of my face. She really was as weird as I remembered.
"No, no, I get it," I said.
"I guess you're wondering how I won," Cornflower said.
"Not really, but... yeah, kind of," I said. I would have thought someone like her would wander into a ditch somewhere or something like that.
"It's really boring. I just found some peanut butter and huddled under a pine bough," Cornflower said.
"But you came out at the end," I said. I'd always wondered what made her risk so much.
"I knew you'd find me eventually and decided to get it over with," she said.
"I watched the tape," I said. I didn't remember my own death very well. Mostly I remembered it got really hot. I'd thought the Gamemakers got bored of the ice and were switching the arena. In hindsight, survival training might be a good idea at the Academy. "Why'd you do it?"
"You're still a person, even if you're a Career," Cornflower said. I would have expected her face to change when she said something like that, but I was beginning to see I needed to change my expectations.
"But I was trying to kill you," I said. Did she not get that? Had she been too done to care?
"Anyone who's trying to kill people like that probably has their own problems," Cornflower said.
I learned a lot about Cornflower that day. I learned she hated touching people, making her vigil over me even kinder. I learned she hated yellow things but absolutely loved viruses. I learned her funky little jerking movements weren't a Games injury but just something she did sometimes- she couldn't explain it herself. I learned she was entirely unpretentious about her victory and actually did hope I did well, though she didn't hope I killed people. Mostly I learned about her, but I could admit there was one thing I did learn from her. The way I thought of her before I knew her, and the way she thought of me before I knew me, I learned to be less judgmental.