Round 1:
Sonic vs. King Dedede

Sonic's iconic finger wag is what led to his tournament highlights. Then, in front of the interview chair, he jogged in place, an aggravated expression on his face.

"Don't worry," Nikki laughed, "This'll go fast. What do you think of Dedede?"

"Honestly, dude's a bruiser but if there's one thing I've learned in these things it's that their wittle egos break when they get hit a bunch, especially the loud ones. I look forward to snapping your ego in half again and again!" cheerily remarked the hedgehog, still running in space.

"Anyone from the newcomer side you're looking forward to fighting?"

"Subject Zero seems like a cool dude. His MP3 player's loaded and his daughter's such a sweetheart. Also, Snake's back, and I wanna go up against him again. Isabelle and Team Chaotix are also interesting, as in they don't seem like fighters but they could really pull off some upsets. Plus Banjo and Kazooie are back in the fold, and I wanna see what they can do."

Nikki giggled, "You seem excited!"

"Smash is the only time I really get to hang out with people without Eggman doing something stupid, and I love to throw hands. Best of both worlds honestly!"

"Alright, we're done!"

"Great!" Sonic cheered, zooming off.

Now King Dedede's match graphic could be seen, visibly sweating as he held his Jet Hammer at maximum charge. His tournament highlights, consisting of mighty hammer blows, played for the audience. Now, leisurely reclined atop an ornate, open-air litter Dedede grinned down at the camera.

"So, what do you think of Sonic?"

"I'LL GIVE THE YOUNG'UN CREDIT, BOY'S A HERO OF THE EMISSARY WARS, NOT AS BIG A HERO AS ME, A REGULAH BENEDICT ARNOLD."

"I'm…I'm talking about the tournament?"

"AW, RIGHT!" Dedede cackled, "DAT DERE HEDGEHOG MAY BE FAST, BUT I HAVE HALF THE BRAIN THAT HE DO! UH, I MEAN, HE HAS…YEAH! HE HAS HALF THE BRAIN THAT I DO! EY! QUIT YER HOOTIN' AND HOLLERIN' OVAH DERE!"
Nikki, turning her mic back up to normal after a hearty chuckle, continued, "I…I don't think we can top that."

"I'MMA WHUP EVERYBODY JUST FOR THAT!" Dedede boomed, "Let's go! Mush mush!"

The Waddle Dees carrying the litter staggered off camera, their bulbous majesty in tow.

"Oh my God kid I'm crying," wheezed Cranky, he and 9-Volt just now composing themselves.

"That ruled," 9-Volt cackled, "Futa-bahahahaha,"

Futaba meanwhile, was wiping away tears of laughter, "I know that Sonic's kind of a distant cousin to us Atlas babies, but I kinda want Dedede to say more dumb stuff actually."

"I think that's the only opinion you've had that's gotten thumbs up from us both. Let's throw it down to entrances."

A high-energy rock instrumental hit the speakers, Sonic jumped off the canopy above the tunnel, spin dashing onto the first-row barrier, and expertly tight-roping it as his song played.

When I don't show off, don't criticize
I'm just livin' by my own feelings
And I won't give in, won't compromise
'Cause I just only have a steadfast heart of gold

I don't know why, I can't leave though it might be tough
But I ain't out of control, just livin' by my word
Don't ask me why, I don't need a reason
I've got my way, my own way

It doesn't matter now what happens I will never give up the fight
Long as the voice inside me says go on I will always keep on running
It doesn't matter who is wrong or who is right.

"WOW!" 9-Volt shouted, "Sonic's made a lap around this huge stadium in nothing flat. I know he's been around for a while but it never ceases to amaze me whenever he does it, plus, anytime I get to listen to "It Doesn't Matter" by Crush 40."

"You're just like all of them," Cranky snapped, sounding like his old self, "Mesmerized by the two things this second-rate Mario knows how to do, be a 90s loafer and go fast."

Sonic jumped to center stage, taking a bow just in time for his rock music to be replaced by traditional Japanese music.

"YEAH THAT'S RIGHT WADDLE DEES AND WADDLE SHEES!" screamed Dedede from atop the litter the second he was visible, "SHOGUN EMPEROR DEDEDE IN THE HOUSE! Y'ALL BETTAH RECOGNIZE!"

"That'll always make me sick," Cranky ranted as the Waddle Dees further struggled to carry the royal penguin, "Bowser and Ganondorf at least inherited dynasties, Wario and Ridley worked their way up through fear. This asshole just told everyone he was the king of a bunch of sentient potatoes…mole…things? And this idiot fancies himself a shogun of all things?"

"Well, politics is a strange thing. Either way, this traditional Japanese version of King Dedede's theme, christened at the Dreamland National Anthem after Brawl, is a very good song."

Finally, Dedede and his Waddle Dee retrainers made to center stage, Mills Frames appearing between them.

"And now, the following contest is a Round 1 Match in the Super Smash Brothers Ultimate Tournament!" Mills began his usual speech, "The winner of this match will face Lucario in Round 2! Introducing first, he comes to us from the Sonic the Hedgehog universe, he is The Blue Blur Himself, he is SONIC THE HEDGEHOG.

Casting a quick thumbs up to the adoring crowd, Sonic let Mills continue.

"And introducing next, to my right, he comes to us from the Kirby Universe, he is The Name You Should Know, he is KING DEDEDE!"

Raising his arms tall and wide to bask in the cheers of Waddle Dees (and the boos of everyone else), Mills continued.

"Now, if King Dedede wins the coin toss, the stage will be Great Cave Offensive. If Sonic wins the coin toss, it'll be Green Hill Zone. Gentlemen call it,"

"Heads!" Sonic shouted.

"HEADS!" Mills agreed after observing the coin.

Both competitors let out huge sighs of relief.

"So the stage has been set! Two-stocks, items medium on Green Hill Zone. Smashers, are you ready!"

Both nodded and disappeared.

Stage: Green Hill Zone

Rules: 2-stock, items medium

Music: Green Hill Zone

3

Sonic erupted onto the stage in Spinball position.

2

On the other side of the slope, the Waddle Dees carried King Dedede's litter for a few final steps, before disappearing, leaving the mallet-wielding king.

1

GO!

Sonic immediately curled into a Spindash, rocketing up the slope between them.

"BATTER UP!" Dedede bellowed.

With a mighty swing of his hammer, Sonic was batted away.

"I'MMA SAMMY SOSA THIS TWO-TIMING TWIT!"

"I don't think so King Dork," Sonic proclaimed, unfurling himself.

Sonic bolted to Dedede, kicking him at the knee. The king immediately fell to his good knee, leaving him open for a barrage of punches and, most embarrassingly of all, slaps. Holding his hammer meekly out in front of him, the base of the hammer spun, first staggering Sonic's fighting stance, and grinding at his exposed chest. So staggered was he by the man-made heart murmur that Dedede hat time to charge up the gap, belly-flopping onto the Hedgehog. Curling into a ball and spinning in place immediately broke the voluminous king's unceremonious hold. As the king recovered with a string of curses, Sonic rocketed forward, taking the king in a tumble with him.

"AND DEDEDE HITS SONIC WITH THR HAMMER JUST SHORT OF THE BLAST ZONE!" 9-Volt announced.

"Dedede is so powerful that all it's gonna take is a few windmills blows to get him out of any sticky situation," Cranky observed.

As Sonic tumbled roughly down the inkling, a Hocotate Ship appeared between him and Dedede. One crushing blow from his mallet meant that not only was Sonic squashed under Dedede's might, but the explosion of the Hoctotate Ship worked in tandem to send Sonic to the Blast Zone.

"And there it is," Cranky smugly said.

"Commentator's curse is real!" hooted 9-Volt

Sonic: 1

King Dedede: 2

Sonic immediately bolted for Dedede, hitting him with a kick to the stomach, and then a jumping Spinball, and then another.

"On the other hand, if Sonic can keep up the juggle, he may be able to turn it around!" Cranky admitted.

"C'mon! Step it up!" Sonic taunted, executing a breakdancing spin on the grassy hill.

"Boy, if you don't…" threatened Dedede

A jet engine unfurled from the base of his hammer, the self-proclaimed King of Dreamland lurching to meet Sonic, the electricity enveloping Dedede as he grunted through the pain, soldiering on.

As soon as the penguin was in reach, he unleashed, Sonic stylishly split-legged jumped over the walloping to come.

At that moment, a Smash Ball appeared, the jet-fueled hammer breaking it with ease.

"Damn it," hissed Sonic.

He couldn't move before he was smacked again, this time so hard he found himself pinned helplessly against a steel cage wall in Arena Dedede. A barrage of missiles later, Sonic finally saw his end. Dedede, his eyes bloodshot beneath a spiked, metal mask, spun into him with a full-force Jet Hammer, collapsing the cage wall behind him, bringing him back to Green Hill Zone, and to the Blast Zone.

GAME!

On the Smash Courtyard, King Dedede cackled as a concerned Waddle Dee watched on.

KING DEDEDE WINS!

Sonic clapped, shooting an annoyed glare as Mister Zero stuck a microphone in his face.

"That was a fast loss, what happened out there."

The glare deepened, "Was that supposed to be a joke?"

"No, but…"

"I'll tell you what happened. I thought I could stick and move with Dedede as I had with Bowser, or worst case scenario keeps taking my licks as Isabelle did, but I guess Dedede had other plans."

Sonic zipped up the tunnel as Rita interviewed Dedede.

"A convincing win against a beloved veteran Your Highness, congratulations!"

"Oooh wee, that was one hell of a hootenanny. Ya did good kid, but you could never do as good as me. As fer you Lucario, I can't wait to taste them Aura Spheres and spit 'em right back at ya. Seeya chump!"

Dedede kicked open the door to the Smashers Box, only to see Sonic happily chatting with Isabelle. Not only that but his entrance yielded more snickers than applause.

"Meta-Knight!" screamed Dedede, "What in tarnation is goin' on heeyuh!"

"With what?" growled Meta-Knight, "Isabelle is somehow proud of that performance, and Sonic is milking it up. Much more disturbingly sire, your 'half the brain' comment, took up most of the talk during your fight.

Dedede sighed, "I'm not gonna live that down am I?"

At that moment, Kirby skipped merrily by,

"Half the brain half the brain half the braaaaaaaaaaain," he sang.

"No," Meta-Knight smirked under his helm, "Definitely not,"

The randomizer cycled through the six remaining matches, landing on...

"CUPHEAD VERSUS YOSHIMITSU!"

Yoshimitsu's cackling brought the room's attention to him, "Finally! We shall see how this will play out! I believe I am in Tunnel B correct!"

"Yes," nodded Shulk.

"Excellent! Dining set boy, prepare thyself!" he warned, spinning his blade like a helicopter to drift above the heads of the other Smashers and down the tunnel.

"He seems like a slaphappy fella," grumbled Cuphead, "Definitely owe him a knock on the noggin for the 'dining set' crack though."

"You've got that idiot! Good luck!" Lucas cheered.

"Thanks, bud. Now, let me amscray," Cuphead nodded, marching determinedly down Tunnel A.