Chapter 14: Protective
I wasn't exactly sure what I was looking at.
Continuing down the path, we ran into a row of weirdness. There was a note, a table with a plate of frozen spaghetti on it, and a microwave.
Reading the note, it said, "HUMAN! PLEASE ENJOY THIS SPAGHETTI. (LITTLE DO YOU KNOW THIS SPAGHETTI IS A TRAP... DESIGNED TO ENTICE YOU! YOU'LL BE SO BUSY EATING IT... THAT YOU WON'T REALIZE THAT YOU AREN'T PROGRESSING! THOROUGHLY JAPED BE THE GREAT PAPYRUS! NYEH-HEH-HEH, PAPYRUS)"
Frisk tried to get the plate of noddle off the table, but it was so cold, it was stuck to the table instead. She then moved on to investigate a nearby mouse hole.
Looking at the microwave, it was unplugged (so it was of no use), and all of its settings said "spaghetti".
"Fantastic," I said, "the only thing keeping us from progressing is how much our time has been wasted."
Frisk, on the other hand, began pointing to empty space, but at this point, I think I knew what she was pointing at.
"Is it another star?" I asked her.
Frisk nodded, and held her hands out to the invisible star.
"Knowing the mouse might one day find a way to heat up the spaghetti... It fills you with determination!"
Frisk smiled, and I knew that our time wasn't wasted. Seeing her happy gave me a warm feeling in my Soul.
"So, tell me, do you know what the deal with that plate is?" I asked Frisk as we moved on.
Frisk nodded her head.
"Of course." This skeleton was one of the strangest monsters I've ever met, and that was saying something.
We passed by a sign that said "Warning: Dog Marriage", which didn't sound so bad, if you asked me. But I wasn't sure what it was supposed to mean. Looking back at the sign, I swore it then read "(yes, you read that correctly)".
Spikes impeded our pathway, so, had to find a switch. Luckily, the solution to where it was on a map on the ground, covered in snow that we had to brush off (which Frisk had way too much fun playing with). Once we could get past, we ran into a pair of monsters that would soon give an answer to what "Dog Marriage" meant?
They seemed to be more dogs monsters part of the Guard. One was a male dog with dark whisking on his chin, the other was a female. They both wore black hoods covering their faces, and they both held axes.
The two of them walked up to our sides, and began... sniffing us. At least they were dogs, so it wasn't too weird.
"What's that smell?" the male dog asked.
"Where's that smell?" the female added, in a smaller voice.
"If you're a smell..."
"...Identify yoursmellf!"
After their... joke, they prancing around while music played from out of nowhere. Once they stopped, they continued with us.
"Hm... Here's that weird smell..." the male said. "It makes me want to eliminate."
"...Eliminate YOU!" the female added.
The dogs stepped back, took their hoods off, and crossed their axes, ready to fight.
"...And you are?" I asked softly.
"Dogamy," the male dog answered.
"Dogaressa," the female replied.
"And we Dogi have assaulted you!" they said together.
"Now, don't touch my hot dog!" Dogamy said.
"He means me..." Dogaressa stated.
Okay, this must be the 'dog marriage', I thought. Well, that's cute that they have each other actually. Better make sure extra hard that Frisk doesn't hurt them.
I looked at the little girl, who seemed to be in deep thought. She did just say she likes dogs, so that might keep her from attacking them, at least.
I leaned down to sign to her, You doing okay. Think you can spare these two?
...If the guy dies, the girl gets really mad! Frisk signed back.
...That makes sense. I took a close look at them to evaluate them. Okay, this is just a guess, but Dogamy is Dogaressa's husband, and he seems to only know what he smells. Dogaressa... I think that puppy finds her hubby lovely!
Smells only?
Yeah. What about it?
"Let's kick some human tail!" Dogamy then shouted.
"Do humans have tails...?" Dogaressa asked.
They began their attack, swinging their axes down in rhythm. We had to weave between to dodge their swings, but at least no one got hurt.
That's when Frisk dropped onto the snow, and began rolling abound in it and the dirt. When she got back up, I was giving her a confused look, until I noticed how she smelled...
I see, I thought, realizing what her plan was. So, I followed her example and did the same.
"No. 2 Nuzzle Champs '98!" Dogamy cheered.
"Of course we were second," Dogarressa said in disappointment.
They began their next attack, where Dogamy... blew kisses at his wife. Well, this was an actual magic attack, releasing a bunch of hearts in a spinning circle, every second one being a blue attack. We had to position ourselves and stand still to avoid the attack, but Dogaressa lovingly accepted them.
After that, I looked to Frisk and nodded to her, which she returned the gesture. "Okay, could you sniff us again?"
The Dogi wasted no time doing so, and what they found surprised them. "What! Now you smell like a..." Dogamy started.
"Are you actually a little puppy!?" Dogaressa exclaimed.
"Yes," I flatly said in a lie.
That is when Frisk stepped up, and pet Dogamy.
"Wow! Pet by another pup!" he exclaimed in shock and joy.
"Well... Don't leave me out..." Dogaressa replied.
I smiled, gave the dog wife a pet of her own.
"A dog that pets dogs... Amazing!" she stated.
The Dogi started at each other, their minds clearly expanded.
"Dogs can pet other dogs?" Dogamy said in amazement.
"A new world has opened up for us..." Dogarssa continued.
"Thanks, weird puppy!" And the two happily walked away.
"I hope those two live a long life together," I said. I began to wonder what it would be like to have something like what they did.
I looked down to Frisk, and she looked downcast. I took a deep breath, knelt down, signing, You okay?
Frisk looked at me, and signed back, we'll be a family forever, right mommy?
I didn't have an answer for her. I was just trying to get her to the Surface. I wasn't comfortable being her mom. But I knew she missed her real mom, and I was the closest thing she got.
"Frisk, I am here for you, don't worry," I finally said. A vague answer, but not untrue.
Frisk smiled, and then grabbed my hand, pulling me along and the path. I just let her do it. It made her happy, and at least we were making progress.
We came up to a new puzzle. There were a few X shapes on the ground, and stepping on them turned them into Os, and then triangles. We had to turn all the Xs into Os, then press a nearby switch. At least, at first, this is what Frisk found out, as I was focused on something else.
Papyrus was standing just beyond a row of spikes barring our way, which would drop upon completion of the puzzle. Frisk went on to do the puzzle without me noticing, while I decided to have a chat with the skeleton.
"Hey there, Paps," I greeted.
Papyrus spun around in surpirse. "WHAT!? HOW DID YOU AVOID MY TRAP? AND, MORE IMPORTANT... IS THERE ANY LEFT FOR ME?"
"Uh, you mean the spaghetti...? We kind of had to leave it there... sor-"
"REALLY!? WOWIE..." Papyrus interruted me. "You resisted the flavor of my homecooked pasta... just so you could share it with me?"
"Not really... it was frozen solid, we're couldn't even move. And by the way, there was nowhere to plug your microwave in," I informed him.
"OH... BUT FRET NOT HUMAN! I, MASTER CHEF PAPYRUS... WILL MAKE YOU ALL THE PASTA YOU COULD EVER WANT! HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH HEH NYEH!"
Papyrus turned around and ran off, while I said to myself, "yeah, looking forward to it..." I had no idea how good Papyrus was at cooking, but I got the feeling that he wasn't too good.
Suddenly, the spikes dropped down. I looked back, and saw that Frisk had completed the puzzle.
"Oh, uh, good job, Frisk," I told her.
She smiled and ran ahead.
It didn't take long for us to run into Papyrus again, where he was checking up on a more complicated version of the previous puzzle.
"You busy?" I asked.
Papyrus was in deep contemplation of something, and ended up telling us, "MY BROTHER STARTED A SOCK COLLECTION RECENTLY. HOW SADDENING..."
"Well, I can't disagree with that."
"SOMETIMES I WONDER WHAT HE WOULD DO... WITHOUT SUCH A COOL GUY TAKING CARE OF HIM? NYEH HEH HEH!"
"Sure..." I really didn't want to know how Sans would react to Papyrus's death. He seemed a lot more capable than he let on, so it probably wouldn't end well. "So, what are you doing here?"
"WELL, YOU SEE HUMAN... HMM... HOW DO I SAY THIS... YOU WERE TAKING A LONG TIME TO ARRIVE, SO... I DECIDED TO IMPROVE THIS PUZZLE... BY ARRANGING THE SNOW TO LOOK MORE LIKE MY FACE. UNFORTUNATELY, THE SNOW FROZE TO THE GROUND. NOW THE SOLUTION IS DIFFERENT! AND, AS USUAL, MY LAZY BROTHER IS NOWHERE AROUND.
"And you thought the solution wouldn't change if you messed with it?" I asked.
"WELL... I SUPPOSE WHAT I AM SAYING IS... WORRY NOT, HUMAN! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WILL SOLVE THIS CONUNDRUM! THEN WE CAN BOTH PROCEED!"
"Always so pompous, aren't you," I replied. "Could... you let us check it out?"
"I SUPPOSE... FEEL FREE TO TRY THE PUZZLE YOURSELF! I'LL TRY NOT TO GIVE AWAY THE ANSWER!"
I thought you didn't know it, I thought. "Whatever." I turned to Frisk. "Think we could solve this together?"
She nodded, and we got to work while Papyrus watched. Frisk, for all intents and purposes, was rather observant. I guess it was because she couldn't speak, so she learned to just watch and listen. Anyway, she was able to point out the best path for the two of us to take to complete the puzzle.
Once we had our solution, we followed are path decided paths, and I then pushed the completion switch, quickly solving the puzzle.
"WOW! YOU SOLVED IT!" Papyrus said, both surprised and impressed. "AND YOU DID IT ALL WITHOUT MY HELP... INCREDIBLE! I'M IMPRESSED! YOU MUST CARE ABOUT PUZZLES LIKE I DO!"
"Well, we were just trying to help all of us out. I bet this puzzle wasn't intended for two people," I replied.
"THAT IS TRUE... BUT STILL, I'M SURE YOU'LL LOVE THE NEXT PUZZLE THEN! IT MIGHT EVEN BO TOO EASY FOR YOU! NYEH! HEH HEH! HEHEHEH!"
Papyrus then ran on ahead, and he passed by another familiar skeleton. And I figured I should talk to him.
"Hey, Sans," I greeted.
"hey, good job on solving it so quickly. you didn't even need my help," the shorter skeleton replied.
"So you were here the whole time? And you didn't want to help?"
"heh, it's fine... 'cause i love doing absolutely nothing."
"Yeah, so helpful," I joked, even though it was true.
"Ah, so here we go," I said. It didn't talk long after last talking to the skeleton bros for us to run into them again.
They were standing on the other side of a series of tiles in various shades of gray, with a strange machine next to them.
"HEY!" Papyrus greeted. "IT'S THE HUMANS!"
"Hey," I greeted back. "You said we'd love this next puzzle. So, what'cha got for us?"
"AH, YES, SO YOU'RE PREPARED FOR THIS ONE. WELL, THIS PUZZLE WAS MADE BY THE GREAT DR. ALPHYS!"
"And I'm supposed to know who that is...?"
"WELL, I SUPPOSE NOT... BUT ANYWAY, YOU SEE THESE TILES!?"
"I do."
"WELL, ONCE I THROW THIS SWITCH... THEY WILL BEGIN TO CHANGE COLOR! EACH COLOR HAS A DIFFERENT FUNCTION!"
"Oh, well go slowly, so we can take them in, at least."
"OF COURSE," Papyrus replied. "AHEM! RED TILES ARE IMPASSABLE! YOU CANNOT WALK ON THEM! YELLOW TILES ARE ELECTRIC! THEY WILL ELECTROCUTE YOU! GREEN TILES ARE ALARM TILES! IF YOU STEP ON THEM... YOU WILL HAVE TO FIGHT A MONSTER! ORANGE TILES ARE ORANGE-SCENTED. THEY WILL MAKE YOU SMELL DELICIOUS!"
Okay, I had to admit, the orange tiles had me concerned. Why did we need to smell delicious? And that was ignoring the green tile's function, too.
"BLUES TILES ARE WATER TILES," Papyrus continued, "SWIM THROUGH IF YOU LIKE, BUT... IF YOU SMELL LIKE ORANGES, THE PIRANHAS WILL BITE YOU. ALSO, IF A BLUE TILE IS NEXT TO A YELLOW TILE, THE WATER WILL ALSO ZAP YOU!"
Well, jeez, I thought, blue tiles sure sound fun!
"PURPLE TILES ARE SLIPPERY!" Papyrus continued on. "YOU WILL SLIDE TO THE NEXT TILE! HOWEVER, THE SLIPPERY SOAP... SMELLS LIKE LEMONS! WHICH PIRANHAS DO NOT LIKE! PURPLE AND BLUE ARE OK! AND FINALLY, PINK TILES. THEY DON'T DO ANYTHING. STEP ON THEM ALL YOU LIKE. HOW WAS THAT!? UNDERSTAND?"
"Y-yeah... I understood it," I replied, and that wasn't a lie. I was good at memorizing things. ...But still, that was a lot to memorize, not to mention how much of that sounded incredibly dangerous.
"GREAT! THEN THERE'S ONE LAST THING... THIS PUZZLE... IS ENTIRELY RANDOM!" Papyrus explained.
Yeah, that's not what I'm worried about, though, I thought.
"...WHEN I PULL THIS SWITCH, IT WILL MAKE A PUZZLE... THAT HAS NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE!" Papyrus went on. "NOT EVEN I WILL KNOW THE SOLUTION! NYEH HEH HEH! GET READY...!"
Suddenly, the tiles lit up into different, and began changing those colors, going faster and faster, until finally...
It settled on a final "pattern"... where the sides were all red tiles, with a path of pink tiles cutting through to the other side. No other color of tile, just a straight path onward.
In disbelief, Papyrus simply... spun away. Sans even stepped aside as his brother spun past him and down the path forward.
"That's... unlucky. What are the odds of that happening," I commented, though honestly, I was relieved. I was glad to not have to deal with those more dangerous tiles.
"they're one in 36,703,368,217-" Sans started as we began to walk down the pink tiled path, but I cut him off.
"Stop."
"okay. so, somthin' i'd like to say, that spaghetti from earlier... it wasn't too bad for my brother. since he started cooking lessons, he's been improving a lot. i bet if he keeps it up, next year he'll even make something edible."
"Oh, I knew it was too good to be true," I joked. "You know, I happen to be a good cook. Maybe I could give him some lessons, sometime."
"heh, i'm sure he'd like that. well, see ya around, chara."
"See ya, Sans." And with that, me and Frisk moved on.
Once we are out of listening distance of Sans, I exclaimed, "Agh! Man, I am glad to have gotten out of that with no danger!"
I'm always scared that it'll be different, Frisk signed.
"Oh yeah, you've probably been through that scene multiple times," I replied. "I get it. I'm just glad we didn't have to deal with piranhas, electrocution, or fighting mon-"
I spoke too soon, as we then ran into Snowdrake and Ice Cap, though they seemed to be a different Snowdrake and Ice Cap than who we faced before, as they had a green color to them. There was also a third monster I didn't recognize...
"Me and my big mouth..." I said quietly to myself.
The third monster in question looked kind of like a generic UFO you'd see in books (or at least some of the surface ones I've read). There were three dull spikes on his head, long thin arms, four legs, and rectangular eyes on the base of his body.
The Snowdrake and Ice Cap looked at the new monster, exclaiming with a sigh, "Jerry." I got the feeling, based on that simple reaction, that this guy wasn't very well-liked.
As the battle began, I prepared to fight this battle the same way as the last. These monsters tended to be fairly similar, after all. It was just "Jerry" that I was concerned about.
I had Frisk stand behind me while a began listening to Snowdrake's jokes, and of course, ignoring the Icecap's hat.
"M.. m.. macaroni and 'freeze'!" the Snowdrake joked.
"Aw, come on, why not pay attention to my cool hat, instead of him," Ice Cap complained, albeit a bit rudely.
But not as much as what I heard from their "friend". "Wow, you guys SUCK at this," Jerry replied, before pulling out some powdered donuts, and began eating them rather loudly, including licking her fingers.
The battle continued on, with Jerry saying other such rude things, like "Why are we doing this? What a fail", "The wi-fi here sucks", and "SHHHH! I'm THINKING, guys!", not really paying attention to the situation.
Okay, I think I get why these guys don't like him, I thought. Even when the monsters attacked, Jerry didn't join in, though the other monsters were so annoyed they didn't end their attacks. From the looks of it, they were trying to discreetly hit Jerry, too, and you know what, I didn't blame them.
Eventually, Frisk tapped my side. Looking over, she pointed to Snowdrake, and signed, I want to say a joke!
"Ah," I turned to Snowdrake. "Hey, Snowdrake, my... friend here has a joke for you." Frisk then pouted to me about my description of her as my friend.
"A joke you say?" he replied.
"Yeah, but she doesn't have a voice, so she has to talk with her hands, and I'll need to translate."
"Okay, shoot!"
Frisk signed to me her joke, and after a quiet chuckle myself, I relayed, "Okay, she says that you're super 'cool'." The two of us even gave a hand sliding motion together.
"Ha! Wow, nice kid. Pretty good for a little gal."
"That's the best one in a while!" Ice Cap added.
Jerry, however, gave a rude laugh and said, "wow, human, you suck!" towards me.
"What, hang on, I think Frisk's joke was great!" I counter.
"Wait, are you saying the kid's joke. Wow, it sucked so bad, she couldn't even say it herself!"
Frisk looked away, being upset, and I was trying to keep my anger in check, red sparks flying off my hands.
Snowdrake stared at Jerry in disbelief. "Were you even listening to the older human?"
"I was paying attention," Ice Cap added. "She said the kid couldn't speak."
"Ah man, so the twerp is so lame, that she's too stupid to spea-" Jerry started, before a blast of red flames launched him backward.
This shocked everyone, and they looked over, finding me, having summoned a Gaster Blaster, its maw still burning with red flame.
"...All battle..." I fumed, as I stomped over to the toppled Jerry, "...you've been SO rude! You've annoyed and insulted all of us, not paid any attention to what was going on AT ALL, and been a complete nuisance. But to make fun of a child, especially one who is mute, iS UNFORGIVABLE!"
"B-but she-" Jerry tried to say, but he went silent as he saw my Blaster building up flames once more.
"What were you going to say?"
"N-nothing..."
"Go home, and don't bother any of us again. Not until you're willing to grow a heart."
Jerry got up, and ran off bawling, disappearing into the woods.
"Wow..." Snowdrake said. "You really need to chill out, no joke."
"I like the attention, but I don't want THAT kind of attention," Ice Cap added.
I dispelled my Blaster, and turned to everyone with an apologetic smile. "Sorry... I shouldn't have reacted like that."
"Nah... it's whatever, honestly," Snowdrake said. "He was always a huge pain in our butts."
"We tried to be nice before, but he just kept being rude back," Ice Cap added. "I'd rather him give us attention, but..."
"He always tried to hang with us, whether we want him to or not. And we never want him to stick with us."
"We try to ditch him, but he always comes back."
"Right... but still, I shouldn't have attacked and threatened him," I admitted. "No matter how awful someone is, you shouldn't hurt them back, if you could help it. That was uncool of me."
"Naw, what was uncool was him making fun of your friend," Snowdrake countered.
"Yeah, and you really stood up to him!" Ice Cap replied.
"You're cool with us, human."
"Well, thank you..." I said bashfully. "We should get going."
"See ya, human!" The pair waved goodbye as we moved onwards.
I turned to Frisk as we walked. "You feeling okay?" I asked her.
Frisk nodded, though she still seemed a little upset.
"You tried, Frisk. Some people just don't appreciate that, and I guess even some monsters are just rude jerks."
Frisk leaned in to clutch me as we continued. I understood why, and it hurt to know that I couldn't be there with her forever.
A figure sat alone, in a dark room, the only light coming from her screen, shining off their glasses, while she ate some noodles. The screen displayed a live visual of the two humans traveling through Snowdin Forest, one a child, one seeming like... a young teen? Though from the audio, it sounded like she might've been older.
This mystery person just watched the older human tell off a known rude monster known as Jerry. They hadn't personally met Jerry, as they didn't live in the same parts of the Underground, but even they knew that he was not a pleasant person.
"Th-that was rather... harsh," they said as they watched the footage. "B-but she did stand up to Jerry of all monsters. More i-importantly... this proves that the older one can use magic, and she seems to know some advanced spells. The only ones I know who can use that kind of blasters..." The monster went silent in contemplation. "...I hope I didn't make a mistake in helping them with the color tile puzzle..."
Author's Note: Now, I'm not going to cover everything in this chapter, just the important stuff, including... yeah, I looked it up and threw it into a calculator for good measure to get the number Sans was spouting.
But in all seriousness, let's talk about that Jerry scene. From the beginning, I wanted to try a... different approach to Jerry, And that is that Chara snaps at him for being so awful, and actually calls him out for it.
I knew EXACTLY how I wanted to write that scene, but I still wanted a reference to the original fight. And this is where the funny story comes in, because when I played and recorded Undertale for a footage reference, I NEVER RAN INTO HIM! No seriously, I never got a fight with him in it, and by the time I realized this, I had already beaten and spared Papyrus AND saved my game, so I couldn't go back to try to trigger it.
The wiki helped to fill the reference I needed, and so did videos on YouTube, though the videos weren't as helpful as I wanted. ...You do know that you CAN spare Jerry, right? I mean, I'm sure most people would rather ditch him, but if you use the Joke Act on Snowdrake while Jerry's in the fight, he can be spared.
I personally do it, because I like to challenge myself in these battles and get the best Spare options for all monsters, even if Jerry isn't shown. Also, as you can tell, that's part of what inspired the Jerry fight in this chapter.
Lastly, for that final scene, I think we all know who that is. A few people theorize that they may have been responsible for Papyrus's unlucky solution to the color tile puzzle. I just chose to make it canon for this story.
Also... that kind of foreshadow scene I wrote, with the unnamed and undescribed character in the dark, talking about something important... I didn't realize this immediately, but... I have a scene like that planned for not one, but TWO of my stories, "Sapphire the Hedgehog" and "Nepsisers: Healing the Empty Heart", and these scenes are being written for the next chapter for both stories! It wasn't intentional, but I'm just like "Am I THAT uncreative? I thought I was creative".
And it's not just that, in the most recent chapter in my Sapphire story, I wrote an event where the main character goes into an abandoned factory to save a friend from their kidnapper. Well, currently, I'm writing a new chapter for "Ultradimension Neptuina: Big Nep and Smolgear" that exact same kind of scene! Plus, both events take place at the end of story arcs in these stories! And again, I didn't realize that right away, so it was unintentional!
Now, just because I realized this now, doesn't mean I'm planning on changing any of this. Each of these scenes serves different purposes to their individual stories, so I can't change it without reworking anything. It's just ridiculous that all of this is happening all at the same time!