It was like out of nowhere a black cloud descended over him. He suddenly felt like there was no point to trying. He was never going to get pregnant, and even if he did, he wasn't gonna be able to keep the sexy jutsu up for such a long time.
When Neji noticed his bad mood, Naruto couldn't even be bothered trying to soften his feelings, it was all so hopeless.
"This is never going to work," he stated.
"Darling, don't say that."
"Why not? It's true."
"Naruto, it's only been a month."
"Exactly! Why is it taking so long…?"
And suddenly a wave of anger washed over him and he just couldn't take any more of Neji telling him things which were obviously messed up, were going to be okay, especially because it was mostly his fault.
"That's not-"
"Leave me alone!"
It wasn't only that the situation was hopeless, he felt physically ill too, like something was draining him. I must be messing this jutsu up.
And when Neji tried to climb into bed beside him, he couldn't think of anything more irritating.
"Don't you even think about it!"
"What?" Neji blinked.
"There's a perfectly good futon in the spare room, use it!"
x
After being dismissed from Naruto's side Neji didn't get a wink of sleep all night, so he was awake when Naruto shouted.
"NEJI!"
He rushed into the bedroom.
"Neji!" Naruto sobbed. "Where were you?"
"You told me to-"
"I needed you! Something is totally wrong. I'm burning up and…"
Naruto flung the sheet back to reveal that he was bleeding.
"Oh."
"What do you mean 'oh'? That's it?! I'm probably dying!"
"You're not dying. You're menstruating."
"I'm what?"
"I really don't think I'm qualified to help you with this."
"With what?"
"Naruto, don't worry. This is supposed to happen."
"What? It is? Why?!" he cried. "It's horrible!"
"Calm down. We're going to clean you up and then I'm going to get Sakura to come talk to you."
x
Naruto was still sitting on the toilet when Sakura arrived. He felt awful, as well as what was happening down there, he felt like he wanted to puke too.
"What are you doing?" she frowned.
"I didn't know what else to do!"
She rolled her eyes.
"Good grief, I can't believe you decided to do something like this without doing some research first."
"Sakura, please… I can't take this from you today…" he said, suddenly feeling like he wanted to cry again.
"Naruto…"
"It hurts and it's gross," he complained, wrapping his arms around his icky belly. "I feel like I wanna puke."
"You think I don't know that?"
"This happens to you too?"
"It happens to every girl. Naruto, how could you decide to have a baby and be totally unprepared for this…" Sakura said in that disapproving tone of hers.
"Well how was I supposed to know it would be so complicated?! And gross!" he cried.
"Here," she said, handing him a bag of stuff he didn't recognise.
"What's all this?"
"These are to help you. These are sanity napkins and these are tampons. It's up to you how you want to handle this."
"I don't understand!" he cried.
She explained enough so he could at least leave the bathroom. Once they were settled on the couch, she turned to him.
"Okay," she said. "I'll start from the start."
And she did. She went right through the whole distressing thing.
"This is why I feel like crap…" he realised. "Sakura, is this why you used to flip out on me sometimes?"
"No," she said. "That was just because you're an idiot."
"Hey!"
She gave him a sympathetic smile.
"This is a good thing, Naruto. It means your body is working like it should. You might actually be able to pull this off."
"You really think so?"
"Well, you've gotten further than any other man, not that I think anyone else would be crazy enough to try…"
"Sakura, stop picking on me," he sniffed, eyes filling with tears again.
"Oh Naruto," she sighed. "Come here." Then she wrapped him up in a rare hug. Wow, I must be truly pitiful. It feels nice to have her support though.
"Hey," Sakura said. "The good thing is this blue feeling will only last a day or two."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah. And then you'll feel on top of the world."
"Really?"
"Sure. Until it starts all over again."
"Sakura…"
"I know," she said. "But it's a good incentive to get pregnant as fast as possible, right?" she said, straightening up to look him in the eye, giving him a smile.
"Definitely," he smiled back. "Thanks, Sakura."
That was the moment when Neji dared to show his face again.
"Is everything okay now?" he checked warily, still keeping his distance.
"Neji," Naruto said, feeling awful for snapping at him the previous night. "I'm so sorry."
"It's alright," Neji assured. "I understand."
"You really don't," Naruto said, going to Neji and hugging him. "But thanks for not holding it against me anyway."
"I just want to support you however you need me to."
"I love you," Naruto said, giving Neji a kiss which he accepted without hesitation.
"Alright," Sakura said, clearing her throat. "I'm going to give you a diet plan, Naruto. And we should start tracking your cycle, it will help you optimise your chances of falling pregnant. And there are things you can do too, Neji. I'll get you some pamphlets to read."
"Thank you, Sakura," Neji said.
"Yeah," Naruto agreed. "Thanks heaps, Sakura. This is something we both really want."
"I can see that," she smiled. "Though honestly boys, I don't know what you'd do without me…"