Disclaimer: Nope.

Author's Note: Hey everyone! Thank you so much for the wonderful reviews! I'm really glad you enjoyed the last chapter, with Harry's conflict with his classmates and his ill-fated trip to the Ministry. The Patronus ... yes, it changes everything. You'll see the ripple effect from that start in this chapter.

I very much appreciate your point about asking why Lily, who's watching over Harry, tells him to trust Severus. Yes, there will certainly be an explanation for that coming later in the story. There have been so many times when Snape's behavior has been absolutely awful when in Harry's vicinity. But you'll definitely see much growth on his part.

Also, you're probably right that Harry wouldn't have been allowed to talk about his testimony in front of his classmates. But you're also right that many fourteen-year-olds would be trying to get as much information out of him as possible.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoy this chapter.

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Severus Snape was, once again, in a very familiar place and setting, experiencing very familiar emotions. The man sitting across from him was calm, and Snape was agitated, which was completely normal.

But both Severus Snape and Albus Dumbledore knew that everything had changed forever. It had only taken a split second for the double life the younger man had been leading for over a decade to come to an end.

Of all the things he'd seen in his life, Severus never, ever thought he'd witness the boy give up. Harry Potter never gave up. It was the one thing Snape had always counted on, that the ridiculous child would continue to play hero for as long as he drew breath. After all, his father had - he'd tried to present himself as the knight in shining armor, although Severus knew he was anything but.

He'd tried to ignore the voice in his head, the voice that always haunted him and that sounded way too much like the woman who dominated his entire existence for comfort, that kept whispering to him that Potter was not like his father. Hadn't there been plenty of instances that proved that very fact to him this year? James Potter would never have collapsed in the corridor. He'd have gotten right back up again and strutted around the castle, proclaiming that he'd saved the school from a big bad. He'd have never admitted to his most hated professor that he'd had enough of everything.

And even if, Merlin forbid, James Potter had been poisoned, he'd never have shown himself to be vulnerable. He'd have been overjoyed to be surrounded by his classmates rather than looking dull and listless. He'd also have boasted and bragged about going to the Ministry to testify in front of a bunch of people.

And now ... Harry Potter was once again lying in a bed in the hospital wing, fast asleep after being given a Dreamless Sleep potion. Draco Malfoy was in a bed next to Potter's, having been given the same thing.

And Severus Snape wanted nothing more than to collapse in his dungeons and not wake up for a long, long time, if ever. It was one of those occasions when he wondered if his life was worth living - and there had been plenty of those. After all, the work he'd dedicated himself to for Dumbledore was over.

No more spying. No more bowing and scraping in front of a Dark Lord whom he no longer believed in, who he now only felt pure and utter hatred for. No more lamb and wine with Lucius and Narcissa Malfoy as the blond wizard smirked and postured and wouldn't shut up about the Dark Lord's evil plans. No more balancing act, deciding what in Merlin's name he was going to say to the Dark Lord to please him and not get tortured today. No more watching his Slytherins walk down the same slippery path he had and not being able to do anything about it.

But no more saving lives. Dumbledore was sure the Dark Lord would return, and Snape would no longer be able to help mitigate the damage. No more redeeming himself for the grotesque mistakes he'd made when he was nothing more than an angry young man seeking revenge on everyone for the wrongs they had done to him. All of that had flown out the window when Severus Snape had felt the icy coldness of the Dementors and realized, with a thrill of terror, that Potter had given up and if he didn't do something, he'd have failed the only person that had ever truly meant anything to him.

He despised that he felt so mixed up inside. Hadn't he wanted this? Hadn't he hoped and prayed that his double life would come to an end? He'd wanted nothing more, hadn't he?

But it wasn't supposed to happen this way. The Dark Lord was supposed to be fully defeated. There wasn't supposed to be any fear that he'd return. The blasted boy was supposed to be safe and go on to live his life with his silly little friends and admirers.

But, above all, he despised that he'd had to reveal his true colors in front of an enormous audience at the Ministry. Every single person in the atrium would have seen the Patronus. Everyone would have seen what form it took. And there was no doubt it would get back to the Dark Lord, who would connect the dots in a second and would know exactly what it meant.

Because as much as he loathed it, Severus Snape had finally accepted that Peter Pettigrew, not Sirius Black, had been the one to betray Lily, James, and Harry Potter. He would have told the Dark Lord that he, Black, and Potter were all Animagi and that Potter's form was a stag. And Severus, over a decade earlier, had come to the Dark Lord, begging for Lily's life. It had made him feel physically ill when he'd had to say that he only wanted her sexually to get revenge on James Potter. After her husband and son were killed, he wanted her for himself. The Dark Lord, having been convinced that no emotion other than greed and hatred had anything to do with Severus's request, had told him that he wouldn't kill the woman unless she made a fuss.

But Lily would most definitely make a fuss, and Snape knew it. That was when he had made the decision to go to Dumbledore. And everything had spiraled from there.

But now, the Dark Lord would know. Albus had always spouted that the monster did not understand such emotions as love, but he would be able to suss out that a silver doe and a stag were ... well ... very much connected. And Patronuses were made out of purely positive emotion. No doubt the Dark Lord would never trust Severus again, even if the man gave it his all. If he ever showed his face to his former Master, he would face excruciating torture and a long, drawn-out, painful death. He would be made an example of. Severus had seen him handle traitors before - he still had nightmares over what the monster did to them.

"Severus." Dumbledore's calm, reasonable voice broke him out of his thoughts. "I am very proud of you."

Severus's black eyes darkened with something unfathomable. How was it that Albus Dumbledore always knew how to say the worst thing possible? To anyone else, it would be a compliment. To the James Potters of the world, it would be vindication. But for Severus, it broke him. Just another manipulation. Just bloody Dumbledore trying to shower him with bloody foe kindness. He only said things like this when he wanted something from Severus. "Do not, Dumbledore," he whispered, horrified at the fact that his voice shook. "Just ... do not."

"You did what you had to do, Severus." Dumbledore was unflappable. "You might have saved everyone in that atrium, as well as Harry and Draco."

Snape snarled. "Because no one there could take care of themselves," he drawled viciously. "Who was I, to expect that anyone else would know how to cast a Patronus?"

"You know they are rare, Severus." Dumbledore remained unfailingly calm. "Whoever made sure those creatures got into the atrium was counting on it."

"No. They were counting on Potter to save the day again," Snape sneered, but something in his stomach clenched when he remembered Potter's face. All his worst memories were taking over as the room had grown icy, and he had seen his breath. He'd caught a glimpse of Lily's vacant, lifeless eyes as he heard the sounds of an infant Potter wailing. He could swear his knees experienced phantom pain as he recalled collapsing on them beside her empty body.

But all the while, he'd still been at the Ministry and Potter's wand was falling from his limp fingers. No one else was deigning to help - somehow, he could still hear the panicked voices of people in the atrium. They were running around like hippogriffs with their heads cut off, not lifting their wands, not even trying. And now, Potter was on the ground and he was going to let the Dementor take him.

And Snape had to do something. A raw, desperate feeling clawed through him. He was going to fail. He would never receive Lily's forgiveness. He would never be able to truly redeem himself. It was over. All over.

But it couldn't be. It couldn't be. He closed his eyes, and remembered.

He was nine years old and lying in the grass with Lily as she rattled off question after question about Hogwarts. Severus felt, for the first time, that he was big and strong as he answered every single one of them, much to Lily's delight. Her emerald eyes sparkled in the sun and Snape had never felt more whole.

He had a best friend. He, lonely, unloved, unwanted Severus Snape, had a best friend. Lily cared about him - actually cared about him. He felt that the smile on her face could light up the whole world. She was the definition of magic itself.

She picked up a blade of grass and rolled it between her fingers as she asked another question about the magnificent castle Severus had grown up hearing stories about. "So there are real ghosts there?" Her voice was full of awe and wonder. "And they won't hurt us?"

"No," Snape reassured her, his lips doing something they barely did - Severus Snape was actually smiling. "No, don't worry, Lil. They won't hurt us. My mum says so."

"That's amazing!" Lily looked positively radiant. "Tell me everything else you know."

Snape obliged her without any hesitation, watching her face as he did so. Merlin, didn't she know that her eyes were pulling him under? He had never met anyone with such beautiful eyes. How was he so incredibly lucky to have found her? And she was drinking in his knowledge as though it were water and she was parched. She wouldn't stop smiling at him, looking at him like he contained the answers to all the questions of the universe. He was more than happy to answer every single question about magic that she asked him.

But it was her final question that caused the smile on his face to grow wider, and his skin tingled as she took his hand in hers. Her skin was so smooth and her eyes were so bright. "And we'll be best friends forever?" she asked, her voice so full of hope and innocence, things he had never possessed before - she had been what opened his eyes to the fact that such things existed in the world.

Severus squeezed her hand, his heart feeling like it was bursting. "Always," he said softly, the sun shining down on them. "You'll always be my best friend, Lily."

Somehow, despite all the pain, the desperation, the anger, the hurt, the feeling of wanting nothing more than to give up himself, he was able to grasp onto that memory as he saw Harry Potter lying on the ground, the Dementor bending over him. "EXPECTO PATRONUM." The roar came from somewhere primal, somewhere in his soul that goodness and purity and love still existed.

The silver doe came out of his wand like a beacon, and Snape was still taken aback by the sheer beauty of it. It had been several years after Lily's life had been taken that Snape attempted to produce a Patronus. He had failed so many times, but Dumbledore was adamant that he learn. Snape had scoffed at the very notion - it was impossible. Someone with a soul as mangled and decayed as his could not achieve such a feat. There was no light left in his life - only darkness and bitterness. The nine-year-old boy who had lain in the grass with his very best friend no longer existed.

But he had been wrong about his abilities, and Dumbledore's face, set in that expression of knowing all along that Severus could do it ... he'd never forget it. Severus had thought it would only be a one-time occurrance, but yet again, he had been wrong.

And now, he'd shown his Patronus in plain sight in front of so many. He'd done it because he had no other choice, but the ramifications were enormous. Even despite the fact they were panicking, how many people at the Ministry had known it was him? Surely they'd seen him raise his wand.

But it was the sight of Lucius Malfoy that assured Snape that his double life was over. He showed no evidence by his expression - it was set in that superior boredom that was so typical of him. But as he stared into Severus's eyes, it couldn't be more apparent that he knew. He had been the Dark Lord's right-hand man during the war, after all, and he made it a point to know things. He'd know about James Potter's Animagus form. And he'd known about Snape's friendship with Lily, too - he'd graduated from Hogwarts when Snape had finished his second year.

He had briefly glanced at Draco before speaking to Severus. "Well. I see that you have the safety of these boys well in hand," he drawled. He struck an intimidating figure, completely ignoring many others in the atrium who were gaping at the scene before them. The temperature was growing warm again as the Dementors had disappeared.

"Father," Draco had said, trying to look straight-backed and poised, but he was failing. He was completely shaken from the Dementor attack. "How are you?"

"I am well, Draco." Lucius haughtily looked down on his son like he was a king on a throne and Draco had disobeyed him. "I do hope that Potter awakens soon," he said, seeing the boy lying unconscious on the ground. "I imagine he will not be testifying today. In fact, I imagine the trial will be postponed until this ... Dementor situation is resolved."

Sure enough, that had been the case. It wasn't often that the Minister of Magic showed up in the atrium to make an announcement, but it was only about a minute later that Cornelius Fudge did so. "We will inform you when a new trial date is set," he blustered, his face red. Snape sneered - the man was pathetic.

And then, Dumbledore had shown up. Typical. He always rode to the rescue at the last bloody minute. Snape had understood that he, Potter, and Draco would be arriving at the Ministry first, but he couldn't help but think snidely that it was so like Dumbledore to wait until everything was over to show up.

"What has happened here, Severus?" the Headmaster asked as many in the atrium took notice of his appearance. Snape noticed that they were all whispering, staring at Potter who was still lying on the ground.

"Dementors." Snape's voice was clipped and terse. "The trial has been postponed."

Dumbledore didn't ask any more questions right then - he just leapt into action. "Right. Let's get you and the boys back to Hogwarts." He put a hand on Draco's shoulder. "Mr. Malfoy? Are you all right?" he asked with concern.

Draco flinched at the gesture. "Fine." But it couldn't be more clear that he was anything but.

And now, both boys were in the hospital wing, and Dumbledore had made sure that Snape had eaten plenty of chocolate. The man could never understand why all those imbeciles and dunderheads he taught feasted on the stuff like it was Merlin's gift to Earth - some of the staff did, too. In Snape's opinion, chocolate was foul. It was way too sweet for his tastes.

"Severus." Dumbledore's voice was gentle, and Severus couldn't bear it. "I know it is a shock. I can only imagine how you are feeling."

Snape snarled viciously. "No, you can't," he growled. "And do not even try to hide from me that you are disappointed. When the time is right, I will no longer be able to fulfil the duties you so kindly gave me," he hissed with bitter sarcasm.

"You made a promise, Severus." The look in Dumbledore's eyes was uncompromising. "And I knew you were going to keep it. But it turned out that circumstances have changed, and you now have to make a different plan. You know what you must do."

Snape felt himself go even colder inside. He had never expected to survive for this day to ever come - he had expected the Dark Lord to discover his treachery. He had expected to be brutalized and killed in front of all his other servants. His passing certainly wasn't going to be pleasant, but he had prepared for it.

He had thought that if, by some miracle, he managed to come out of this alive, he'd leave Hogwarts forever. He'd never wanted to be a teacher anyway, and if he never saw another spoiled, entitled brat ever again, it would be all for the better. He could brew potions in a labratory and never look back.

Or, on his most awful and cynical days, he thought that he would just end it all. He remembered those first days without Lily and how he'd wanted nothing more than to pour that damned poison he'd created down his own throat. He deserved it - he knew the excruciating pain that poison produced, and he wanted to feel it. Lily had died screaming. She'd died screaming and he couldn't live without her. Potter's spawn was the only part of her left. Those facts alone were enough to drive him towards being desperate enough to end it all.

And now, truly, what did he have left without his promise to Dumbledore that he'd help end the Dark Lord? But deep down, he knew Lily would never forgive him. Even if he were to end his life, she'd still want nothing to do with him. He had no hope in this world - but what could he expect from the next one? Severus Snape just had to get used to the fact that there was just nothing on any plane of existence that was meant for him.

But something called to him now as he sat in front of Dumbledore. "You know what you must do." The coldness he felt at those words spread through him, but at the same time, his mind was blaring at him. He knew what he must do - but could he do it? Merlin, he didn't want to. The prospect of it was just too difficult.

But he remembered all too well the day that he'd brought Draco into his office, the day when the blond boy had found out just who had attacked him - and it wasn't Mad-Eye Moody. He recalled the sheer hurt in Draco's eyes, and the way he'd lashed out in helplessness and pain. Crouch, Jr. was supposed to protect him, but he had wounded him instead. He remembered looking at Draco and wishing with every fiber of his being that he wasn't living his double life, and that he could help Draco realize that the path toward the Death Eaters was not the one to go down. He had wanted to help all the other Death Eaters' children, too, as he watched the darkness and bitterness grow in their eyes.

Now, some of those children will want to murder me after they find out what side I'm truly on, Snape thought. Some would be too scared to take action, too frightened of the prospect of failure or that they would be reprimanded if the Dark Lord returned. Others might be like Blaise Zabini, trying their hand at some dastardly scheme. Severus had to be very, very careful. Not that he honestly cared about his own life - but he did not want any students being caught in the crossfire. Maybe his spying skills could still be put to use. And Dumbledore was far from stupid - he would be aware of it as well. Severus would need to hone his skills - he'd have to be very, very alert indeed.

Severus had been lost in thought, and Dumbledore held his gaze, an entire ocean of thoughts passing between them. And then, Dumbledore said those dreaded words for the second time in Severus's life. "Your way forward is clear."

Snape stood up and started pacing. The last time Dumbledore had said those words was right after he'd seen Lily's body, and proclaimed he wanted to die. The lack of sympathy in the man's eyes had cut him to the quick as he told Snape that his wanting to kill himself wouldn't help anyone. And the old fool had never lost his ability to hurt others with his words. He knew Severus too well, and knew exactly how to bring him to heel.

"No, it isn't, old man," Snape snarled at him. "I cannot work miracles, as you well know. Do you honestly expect me, after all these years of students like Draco thinking that I was the Dark Lord's pawn, to be the one to lead them away from that path? You are aware that some will be plotting my demise within hours of finding out the truth about me!"

"I not only think you can help Draco, and any other student who is making the wrong choices." Dumbledore was completely unperturbed by Snape's outburst. "You must be there for Harry now, as well. I have no doubt he will connect the dots and see your Patronus for what it truly represents."

That had to be about the worst thing Dumbledore could have said. His blood boiling, Snape stared at him with loathing. "Do you know Potter at all, you complete and utter fool?" If looks could kill, Dumbledore would have been no more right at that moment. "With all that I've done and all that I am, do you really think that I am likely to share a heart-to-heart with Potter over ..." He stopped, his throat constricting so much that he was unable to go on.

"Severus, you might be one of the only people who can help Harry now," Dumbledore said quietly. "He is very angry with me. I suspect I have lost a lot of his trust."

Snape gaped at Dumbledore. "You really are delusional," he whispered before collapsing back into his chair. "You honestly think I can earn his trust rather than you earn it back? The boy has loathed me for over three years, and I have done the very same."

"Because you decided to loathe him for things that were never his fault." Dumbledore's voice had gone sharp again. "And he truly didn't understand why a man he'd never interacted with before was showing him such spite. But this is your chance, Severus. You already showed that you were capable of it. This is your chance to show Harry that you are the man I know you can be."

"And how many times do I have to tell you, Headmaster, that I am not a good person?" Snape shouted at him. "Do you not remember all that I've done? Do you not recall the lives I have taken? I plotted your demise when I was seventeen years old, Dumbledore. I do not understand what escapes you about that."

"Severus, you are telling me nothing I do not already know," Dumbledore said, and he smiled at him. Snape had the wild urge to cast a painful curse at him right then and there. The twinkle in the Headmaster's eyes told Snape that he suspected exactly what he was thinking and simply did not care. "And I am not going to accept your reasoning as to why you cannot do as I ask. You may not have been a good man once, Severus. You have said and done terrible things, my boy, things that still cause you nightmares. Things you will always feel remorse for."

Dumbledore's blue eyes bore directly into Severus's soul, and he felt like he was being dissected piece by piece. His heart raced as his entire psyche was shredded by that stare.

"But that does not mean that you do not have the chance to right your wrongs, child. And right now, I am telling you to go to the hospital wing and look in on Harry and Draco. You will no longer be able to do the work that I asked of you thirteen years ago. But what I am asking of you now might be even more important."

His eyes still stared into Severus's, and the other man could not look away. "I am asking you to help heal Harry, and to be there and support Draco and your other students who need your guidance. But even more than that - I am asking you to heal yourself."

A lump formed in Severus's throat as his fury evaporated, and despair replaced it. "There is no healing for me, Albus," he whispered. "You know that."

"And that, my boy, is where you and I disagree. There is plenty of room for healing." Dumbledore's voice was gentle. "Please go to the hospital wing, Severus. That will be a start."

"Now?" Severus felt like a tiny child who was resigned to his fate - Dumbledore had never ceased to make him feel that way, from the first day he had begged for Lily's life on that dark, lonely hillside.

"Yes, now." Dumbledore nodded resolutely. "I have the utmost faith in you."