Note: Directly based on the advertisement made for the merch of Murder Drones Episode 6 "Dead End". I really enjoyed the video (and the poster itself) so I made this for fun. Don't think too hard about how this fits in, like how Sam is somehow alive to leave a review.
Uzi glared at the three drones sitting in front of her desk, twirling a pen in her hand. Facing her with varying expressions and emotions was her dad, Khan Doorman, her class's renowned druggee Sam, and the local Disassembly Drone leader J. While Uzi suppressed the urge to throw her pen at them (mainly J), she groaned and pointed them toward a curtained hallway. "Just get in there, watch the movie, and write a review or something when you leave."
Khan leaned over to give an unwanted pat to Uzi's head, to which she growled. "Sure thing kiddo!" The older drone smiled as he headed in, Sam following behind him with a dazed look in his magenta eyes.
J, being the last in the room, threw a glare of her own to Uzi. "What exactly compelled you to make a movie of all things?"
The edgy teen rolled her eyes. "Apparently N has a thing for selling merchandise based on our experiences now, so he wanted to make a movie about them as an excuse to sell more." Seeing J raise an eyebrow, she groaned. "Just watch the frickin' movie! And give it a good rating too or I'll tell Dror you're a snooty nitpicker."
Uzi had to duck to avoid getting shot with a bullet, peeking up behind her desk to see J's face flared in anger and pointing a gun in her direction. She gave a nervous wave. "Alright, too far, sheesh."
J huffed in annoyance and walked through the curtains, entering a dark room with a projector and 3 plastic chairs, 2 of which already being filled by Khan and Sam. As she took her seat between the two, the film finally began.
The movie opened on an establishing shot of snow-covered woods, the footage had a grainy filter all over it to give it a vintage look. All three viewers strained their digital eyes as they noticed.
Sam questioned. "Uh... Is it like... broken?"
Putting his hands together, Khan piped up. "I'll just take a look at the projector."
Just as he stood up, Uzi's muffled voice shouted from behind the curtain. "IT'S AN ARTISTIC CHOICE, NORMIES!" To which Khan quietly sat back down.
As it played, Sam suddenly perked up as a Worker Drone ran into the scene, one with a familiar outfit and eye color. He pointed at the screen. "Woah, I didn't know I would be in this!" True to his observation, the drone on screen was dressed in a familiar hoodie with a woolen hat and magenta eyes. It was fairly convincing, although J could tell that the eye colors are just a video effects filter. Sam, on the other hand, was a little weirded out. "Wait, was someone spying on me?"
He was quickly proven wrong when the fake Sam on-screen yelled in fear before something off-screen grabbed and brutally murdered him, spraying oil on the snow and trees (clearly done by throwing buckets of motor oil around). The real Sam's eyes hollowed out in horror as the film transitions to the title card:
IT CAME FROM COPPER-9
Directed by Uzi Doorman
Produced by Serial Designation N
J rolled her eyes at the cheesy title and music, leaning back into her seat as she reluctantly accepted how mind-numbing the experience was going to be.
Throughout the film, more familiar faces appeared. Ranging from other cinematic stand-ins like an actor dressed as the psycho Alice to others like Uzi and Doll playing themselves as they fought each other at Prom. For J, the most amusement she got was picking apart who were actors and who were the real drones. The movie itself jumped around so often with chaotically fast pacing that it was the only thing keeping her attention.
Even as a rather convincing looking Anti-Drone Sentinel chased a random worker down a hallway, J couldn't help but yawn. Her seatmates, on the other hand, were rather engaged. Sam's eyes were basically glued to the screen while Khan smiled as the Sentinel's attack was halted by a door slamming before it could get in.
He shouted in joy. "That's what I'm talking about! Nothing a good, beautiful door can't solve."
...Only for the door to get completely torn off its hinges by the Sentinel as it swiftly ripped apart the drone it was chasing, causing the smile on Khan's face to slowly fade to a muted frown as he sat back in his chair and pouted. J had to suppress her laughter, while Uzi did no such thing and could be heard cackling in the other room.
Unfortunately for J, her personal amusement quickly faded once the film transitioned to the next scene, leaving J staring at her own cinematic counterpart. More accurately, V with hair extensions and a carbon copy of J's own wardrobe to mimic her. J grumbled a swear, "Oh, fourth quarter profit..."
During a conversation with N, 'J' cleared her throat as the camera focused on her. "Don't you understand 'moron'!? If the great and powerful company learns of this incident, it might be a mark on our record! The next time we get rewarded, I might get one less branded pen than usual! Oh the bankruptcy of it all!" She exclaimed with the most over-dramatic acting she could muster, almost as if she was intentionally mocking the drone she was playing.
The real J gripped her crossed arms with intense frustration, trying her best to resist the urge to fire a rocket at the screen. She gritted her teeth and muttered. "I do not fall on my hands and knees for the company that pitifully... And that's not how you use the word 'bankruptcy' V!"
Khan and Sam scooted their chairs away from J, clearly feeling the malice emitting from her while Uzi just continued to laugh.
The climax of the film was fittingly generic, with Uzi making herself some badass heroine while N was her strong yet comedic sidekick. V never showed up in the film, instead she just played 'J' the entire movie up to the character getting killed off and becoming some giant murder worm. A scene that forced J to once again restrain herself from going on a pride-fueled rampage.
After the credits had rolled, the audience of three stepped out of the room and walked over to Uzi's desk. She held up three papers and a pen. "Go ahead write your thoughts on here."
Sam went first, writing down a rather positive review on his paper. "It's scary cause it's like...real." With that he walked off and pulled a magnet out of his pocket which he promptly stuck to his head, clearly enjoying the scrambling it gave his circuitry.
Next was Khan, who gave a passing yet more neutral review. "Three out of five. Doors play an important yet ultimately only supporting role." Uzi just rolled her eyes and accepted it, already knowing to expect a weird "door" comment from her father.
When J walked up, she took a JCJenson-brand pen out of her pocket, ignoring the non-branded one offered by Uzi, and quickly but neatly wrote a lengthy, extremely detailed negative review that took up the whole page, shooting a look at Uzi as she slammed the paper down on the desk. "If this schlock breaks even, I'll eat my foot joint."
Uzi glared at the negative review of her film but accepted the paper regardless, annoyed at how genuinely informative the J's critiques were. Uzi muttered under her breath. "Whatever. See if I invite you to test screen the next one..."
J, just glad to finally have the waste of time over with, ignored Uzi and promptly exited the room into the colony proper, only to be surprised to see none other than Dror awaiting her and leaning against the wall. He waved to her. "Sup J?"
Confused, she made her way over and leaned against the wall herself, crossing her arms. "The heck are you doing here? That brat rope you into watching her lame movie next?"
Dror waved her off. "Hah! Nope. I mean it'd be kinda biased getting a review from someone who helped make the darn thing, don't you think?"
J's eyebrows shot up. "...Wait what?"
Not noticing her expression. Dror explained nonchalantly. "Oh yeah, N gave me 'creative consultant' duties since I already watch a ton of movies. I was tempted to say no buuut he even gave me a free poster, so I agreed. Petty, I know" He reached into his jacket and pulled out a rolled up poster that he promptly unfurled to show to J. It displayed all the characters and monsters in the film, including J's fake counterpart. He then rolled his eyes however. "I wrote the initial treatment while Uzi and N turned it into a script. Granted I think the quality dropped with some of the changes they made, especially since so many of the 'actors' preferred to just improvise most of their lines. Oh, and yeah I definitely did not approve of V's overdramatic performance as you. Still, I thought it turned out good enough. What'd you think of it?"
Processing everything, J quickly forced a smile and said. "Excuse me a sec, I uh... forgot my pen. Be right baaaaack!"
J briskly dashed back into the room, leaving Dror still holding the poster with a blank expression. Uzi was just about to pack away the review papers when she jumped in shock as J slammed her hands onto the desk. "Give it back!"
Uzi quickly recovered from her near-malfunction of fright to shoot J a look. "What the hell!? Give what back!?"
J just growled. "The paper you little twerp! Hand it over!"
Both drones glared at each other, as if in an old fashioned standoff, until the purple one groaned and reached into her backpack, pulling out J's feedback paper. J immediately snatched it away and, with her review in hand, clicked her branded pen and rapidly scribbled out her entire review. Uzi cringed at the annoying scratching noise it made. When she was done, J dropped the paper back on the desk and hurried back outside.
Uzi only stared in complete confusion. "The heck was her deal?" Looking down at the paper, most of it was now a huge mess of black ink and scratches. The only thing eligible was a small sentence written at the very bottom:
It was okay, I guess.
