Right, there's been a couple of commenters saying that the way Twilight is written isn't the way she is supposed to be. So! Here is my disclaimer –

Twilight Fucking Sparkle in this story as well as the prequel is a complete nutcase with a very black and white view of the world. She wants knowledge and desires strongly to please her mentor, anyone who shows Celestia even the tiniest amount of disrespect is in the way of her world view is thereby subject to 'removal'. Basically, since Chrissy spat on Celestia, refused to allow herself to be blackmailed by Celestia, and also refused to be a loyal subject, she is thereby considered by Twilight to be a major- threat.

Remember, this is an ALTERNATE UNIVERSE! As in not the one watched every Saturday.

There done. This is a short filler chapter just to branch out on Richard's POV in regards to Chrissy's struggle to resist her instincts, as well as slightly expand on just why he isn't ready to fuck her brains out yet. A longer one will come soon, promise.

Begin!

I'm Scared Richie

Richard POV (One Week, Two Days After Feral)

The past few days have been hell, and I don't know how to make it any better. Worst of all, I don't even know how to fix this. How can I fix anything when I'm the problem?

It started the day after Chrissy had regained her sense of self. We'd slept that night and previous day away, and awoke to something strange…or at least I awoke to something strange. I was in the bathroom having a shave when I felt…angry, but it was bizarre because I wasn't angry at the time, I felt calm while shaving, I always have.

But when I put the razor down and looked back into that mirror, a wave of anger so intense made me want to punch it in a rage…and then it vanished, replaced by a feeling of utter helplessness, of sorrow and pain I hadn't felt since I looked into Emily's eyes as she was dying in my arms.

And then that too vanished…

I came out of the bathroom and made to tell Chrissy about the weird emotions but the Changeling didn't even look at me, choosing instead to barge past me into the bathroom and lock the door.

She's angry with me…

I couldn't help but think it was because of what I'd had to do to her when she went feral…and I couldn't think of any way to apologize sufficiently for it. I felt terrible for doing it to her, and even worse when I actually did it…when I watched as she hissed and snarled, fighting to get it off of her like an animal.

That day…the two of us didn't really talk to one another. We stayed in the same room, but she chose to read and after being brushed off for the third time I gave up and sipped on a cider, contemplating on how to get her to talk to me without thoroughly pissing her off.

Is it her time of the month…does she even have that?

When the evening came and it was time for sleep, Chrissy followed me silently into our bedroom and slipped under the covers, her back turned to me and before I knew it she was asleep in mere moments. I watched her breathe steadily for quite some time, unable to figure out where this sudden silent treatment was coming from. Chrissy was always a woman to tell someone what they'd done wrong when they pissed her off…her silence was unnerving.

And when it continued into the next day, I lost my temper with her.

"Chrissy," I snapped her name with irritation I hadn't felt with it before. "Will you please look at me when I'm talking to you?"

She blinked a couple of times at the book she was reading before her muzzle scrunched up in annoyance, her head turning to look at me with a raised eyebrow. "What is it?"

Her voice was seemingly…bored, annoyed, her obvious desire to not speak to me was clear. I couldn't believe this was the same girl I'd been dancing with only a few nights before.

"What is it?" I echoed, fighting not to snap at her again. "Chrissy you've been ignoring me for the past two days. And when you do talk to me, it's obvious you don't want to do so…so what have I done to deserve it?"

"Oh, and it's all about you now isn't it?" she bit sarcastically, eyes narrowing in annoyance. "That's what it is now isn't it, all about you. What is it with you Richard? Can I not simply want to read a book and have some quiet, or do you need a kiss every few minutes just to make sure I still love you. Are you that insecure?"

Without giving me a single moment to reply, she chucked her book away and made to walk out of the room. I put my hand on her shoulder and stopped her, but only seemed to make it worse as she turned around and snapped at my hand, grazing it before I could pull it away completely.

"Chrissy what the fuck is wrong with you!" I yelled, holding my hand and rubbing it to stave off the pain. Blood dripped down it, but I didn't care too much at the time. "I'm not insecure and it's not all about me at all, I don't know where to fuck you're coming from with that horseshit because all I want is to actually have a conversation with my best friend, but clearly that's too much for you!!

Chrissy stared at my injured hand and blinked, her ears pinned back in sorrow as her expression twisted from anger into sadness. She walked a little closer but stopped when I backed away instinctively, unsure as to whether she was going to bite me again or not.

"Richard I'm…I'm sorry, I didn't mean to!" she cried, her tone clearly upset. "I…I think it's from what happened the other night. I know it's not your fault that it happened, but I look at you and all I want to do is…is bite you." She moved close to me and looked at me with those sad eyes, silently pleading for forgiveness.

I sighed and put my hands on her cheeks, kissing her snout lovingly before I moved down and gave her a chaste kiss on the lips. "It's okay, I forgive you. But please don't ignore it like you've been doing, it…it does hurt when you ignore me."

"I know, I could feel it but I didn't want to care. If I did then I'd want to hold you and kiss you, and bite…" she stopped talking, lips trembling as her eyes became filled with tears. "Richard, I've been feeling things, thinking things about our relationship and it scares me when I do. There are moments where all I want is to hold you down and force you to become my mate, and then there are other's where all I want to do is drain you, like you're nothing more than a source of food for me." She let loose a low hiss of pain as tears began to fall. "I don't know what's happening to me and I'm scared Richie, I'm really scared I'm going to hurt you. So if I just ignore you then I…then I won't…"

"You won't hurt me," I soothed, wrapping my arms around her and drawing her in closely. "Chrissy, I know you can feel how much I love you. So don't ignore it, please…I miss you."

I could feel the tension leave her bit by bit as she relaxed against me, the familiar purr of contentment coming from her muzzle as she soaked up all I felt for her in that moment. She kissed my chin happily, sighing just as much so as she moved up to my lips briefly then down and down, then to the side where she licked it tenderly.

"Chrissy?" I asked, the hair on the back of my neck standing up.

"Be still my love," she whispered lovingly, her grip tightening as her muzzle opened and-

Chrissy hissed in visible fury as I wrenched myself from her, her fangs only just managing to not break the skin as she tried to bite down. Her eyes were literally glowing with a green aura, her tongue flicking against the air, teeth bared as she moved forward two steps…before blinking and taking a shuddering breath, tears already matting her fur as she ran into the bathroom and locked the door,

"Chrissy open the door!"

"Go away, you have to stay away from-" the words were interrupted by hissing as she screamed and the sound of something breaking followed…then silence.

"Sweetie?" I tried to open the door, but couldn't as it was locked.

...

The door suddenly clicked and I opened it to be instantly greeted by Chrissy jumping on me and pushing me down, her eyes glowing as she looked down at me with a loving, feral smile. I tried to grab her and throw her off, but her horn glowed and my hands were placed gently but firmly down on the ground.

"Chrissy, please don't-"

"Hush now baby," she crooned, putting a hoof on my lips as her iris literally began thinning as she spoke. "You're so concerned about me, it's so lovely to feel. How I wish you could feel what I do for you too…oh, but wait. You can."

She grinned down at me as she lowered her head to my neck and nuzzled it affectionately. "You're so worried about mating with me, it makes a Changeling worry there's someone else on your mind. But that can't be right, can it. You couldn't possibly feel love for another, could you. Because if you did then I think I'd have to rip her throat out."

"I only love you, but you know I'm not ready for this yet," I said, pleading with her to understand as I tried and failed to move my arms. Her eyes lidded with affection and she sighed, moving up and smiling down at me patiently.

"It has nothing to do with not being ready love," she said, stroking my cheek. "You're just nervous. But don't worry, I'm going to make you feel like nothing you've ever felt before." She moved back down to my neck and licked it gently, a soft hush leaving her muzzle as I desperately fought against her magic. "The venom will change you slightly, but it's a good change. You'll be stronger, faster, and you won't look any different on the outside."

"Chrissy, please snap out of it. I don't want this; I don't want this yet!"

She looked at my desperate eyes one more time and sighed, shaking her head and smiling with complete and utter love as I continued to fight against her.

"This won't hurt a bit, I promise," she whispered quietly, kissing me deeply on the lips before she moved down to my now numb neck.

The sound of the doorbell ringing literally saved me, the suddenness of it all forcing Chrissy's head to snap back up, her iris returning to normal in but a moment before she looked down at me and whimpered, her body beginning to shake like a leaf.

And even though every single part of me was screaming at me to throw her away from me, I still wrapped my arms around her and held her close, forcing myself to ignore her weak attempts to push herself away, evidently fighting against her own instincts to stay close.

"It's not your fault," I whispered, kissing her right ear to soothe her. "It's not your fault."

She tried to say something, but it came out as a hiss. She tried again and again, until eventually…

"I'm scared Richard," she cried, half hissing the words as sudden heavy sobs left her. She collapsed and cried against me. "I couldn't stop myself, I couldn't stop, I couldn't stop…"

The doorbell rang four more times that night, but I didn't answer a single one. No, I held Chrissy against me and fed her all the love I could give until her eyes closed and she finally stopped crying, a tiny smile on her muzzle as she snoozed on my chest.

I wasn't ready to have sex with her, I still felt far too…damaged, haunted by Emily's dead eyes to fully let go and give my whole self away like that. But I knew if I didn't then it was only going to get worse. And so…I looked at my best friend and closed my eyes, the question practically spelt out for me in my mind.

Did I love her enough to sacrifice not only what was left of my innocence, but from what I'd come to understand…literally change?

For her sanity…do I consent and do this, or wait until I feel ready?

How could I let Emily go?