I did tell y'all in my private messenger I'd start posting again in the summer, by my clock I've got about 30 minutes to spare! ;) (also I do answer my PMs if anyone wants to say hi, kinda sad I can't reply to reviews like I can on AO3)

ALMOST all the prior chapters have been updated (managed to not get around to the time skip chapters somehow) and as a thank you to you all for sticking with me I've been writing something a little extra! The first chapter of a side fic of Jasper's POV of the Maria chapters has now been uploaded if you want to check it out.

You're all amazing, thank you for sticking with me. I've now written about 3 months ahead with weekly uploads and only have about 6 chapters left to write until we're done - so hopefully it'll be smooth sailing from here on out!


February 13th, 1916. Carlisle.

"Are you enjoying the roast, Dr Cullen?"

"Mm, yes." Carlisle choked. "It's… lovely."

"Mother," said Esme from her spot beside him, "have you shown Dr Cullen your new spoons yet?"

"Oh!" Mrs Platt jumped up from the table and jostled her husband's glass of wine. "No, I'll go get them now!"

Disgruntled and uninterested, Mr Platt and young Alexander returned to their food and paid the young couple no mind. Esme hastily scooped up some of Carlisle's dinner and put it on her plate, a trick she had been pulling over and over all night. Carlisle grinned at her as he pretended to sip his wine and she smirked back.

"Here it is, Dr Cullen do have a look!"

As Carlisle feigned interest in the spoons Mrs Platt turned an appraising eye over her daughter.

"Are you feeling quite alright, dear?" she asked. "Your plate is still full, you must have barely eaten."

"I'm alright, just still full from lunch." Esme smiled like butter wouldn't melt, her mother allowed it, only faintly complaining about why she even bothers and her daughter getting too skinny.

When dinner was finally over and Carlisle could stop counting the seconds, he was invited into Mr Platt's study for their customary brandy. He prepared himself, this was it - the moment he had come here for.

"Mr Platt," he said as the man settled into his favoured armchair, "I was wondering sir if I could ask for your daughter's hand in marriage."

Mr Platt had just taken a sip of brandy and had to recover from a light coughing fit before he could grin and heartily shake Carlisle's hand, offering his complete and absolute support. He responded to Carlisle's assurances of giving Esme a good life in a good house by waving them off and saying "yes yes I know" and ushered him into an empty drawing room that Esme was soon pushed into too.

She grinned. "I suppose he says yes then?"

He only smiled and took her hand to softly kiss her wrist. They stayed in there just long enough for the family to think he was proposing for the first time and then joined the ecstatic celebrations when they told them the happy news.


April 8th, 1916. Bella.

Bella's bridesmaid dress was made of lilac tulle; beautiful, floaty, and delicate - and she had already accidentally ripped it twice. Irina was practically following her around with a sewing kit, begging her to be careful and cringing every time she made a sudden move. Bella decided it wasn't her own fault, she was so used to the specialised reinforced wardrobe Irina usually sent to their house that she didn't know how to cope in human clothes. She'd never worn tulle before, it was far too delicate for her tendencies to pick at hems and walk with big steps. She only wished Esme had known that before choosing dresses.

The whole house could hear Carlisle pacing upstairs. It was 8am and he had been ready since 3, too nervous to stay still or find anything else to do. The entire family was in town, nine vampires all in one place. That wasn't a common occurrence, and with the amount of very precious humans nearby everyone was nervous. Bella knew she was biased, according to the sisters he hadn't slipped up in 20 years, but she couldn't stop keeping track of Laurent. She couldn't trust him so close to Esme.

She was headed to Esme's house herself soon. She had elected to get ready at home in case she needed help not ripping the dress (at least she was self aware) but needed to accompany the bride to the church. It was almost time to go, but she had something she had to do first.

She fetched something from her room and made her way down to Carlisle's. She could hear his foot tapping so quickly it was just a vibration and wondered how deep the groove in the floorboards would be. She knocked and entered, he turned to give her a quick smile.

"Hi," she said. "How're you doing?"

"Oh, brilliantly."

"Really?"

He sighed. "Am I that obvious?"

"Carlisle, I'm surprised the floor hasn't fallen in yet."

He let out a weak laugh. "Are you headed to Esme's?"

"In a second, there's something I need to give you first."

She held out a plain white envelope with 'Carlisle' written on the front in her clumsy calligraphy.

"What is this?"

"A wedding present," she smirked. "It's not much, but it's something I know you've been wanting."

Carlisle smiled, took it and turned it over. It was unsealed, he popped it open and slid out the contents. A single photograph fell into his hand, he gasped ever so slightly and absorbed it with hungry eyes.

Bella knew it well, she had been waiting decades to give it to him. A wedding photo, blurred enough with time that you couldn't quite make out the individual features of the bride and groom - but if you knew them well enough it was clear who they were. Carlisle's expression changed from second to second as his analytical brain dissected every piece of information he could glean from the picture. Bella wondered what he had figured out. It was just them in the picture, with a simple courthouse in the background. Carlisle and Esme's first wedding was a much quieter affair, afterall. There was no party, no bridal shower, no family to celebrate their union aside from Edward and the Denalis. Maybe Carlisle was pondering who took the picture, she thought. It was quite obviously Edward, obvious to her at least. Despite being a virtuoso at the piano, all other artistic pursuits had always evaded him and every photo he had ever taken was off centre and blurry like this one.

She was grateful for it now. It allowed her to give Carlisle this moment without spoiling the first time he would see Esme as a vampire. The blur and the huge 1920s veil obscured her face just enough, but there was no denying that her hands were paler than even his as they were clasped by their sides.

He finally looked up as if he had forgotten she was in the room. He smiled at her, no, beamed at her with his eyes bright with unshedable tears.

"My birth parents didn't love each other," she said before he could thank her. "Not really, anyway. And even though I loved Edward when I first met him, I was silly and seventeen and didn't really know what love meant." She swallowed and took a shaky breath, venom tears clouding her own vision. "It was you and Esme who taught me what it means. You two showed me that love lives in the little things, that true love grows whenever it finds places to grow into. I don't believe in soulmates or true mates or any of that, but some people are so unbelievably perfect for each other that nothing could ever come between them and you two are that, I know you are…"

Carlisle grabbed her and held her to his chest before she could ramble further.

"Thank you," he whispered.

She shook her head. "No, thank you. Thank you for letting me be your daughter."


She left him to go to Esme's house at half past 8. The door was already open and she could hear the commotion of the entire extended Platt family from two streets away. She knocked on the doorframe as she let herself in and was immediately directed up to the bride's room.

"It's going to be okay, Esme!" Bella heard Claire say through the door. "It's fine! No one will notice!"

"But you don't understand! They will!"

Confused and vaguely alarmed, Bella pushed the door open to find Esme two inches from the mirror poking at her face.

"Hey!" she tried to sound soothing. "Good morning bride to be!"

Esme just whimpered, barely sparing her a glance. Claire sighed.

"She's got a pimple."

Oh. Bella had almost forgotten about that unfortunate side of being a human.

"I'm sure it's not that bad!" she said.

Esme turned, a sad look in her eyes. There was a glaring red mark on her right cheek, clearly all the worse for her having picked at it.

She sighed. "It's really bad, isn't it?"

"No!" Bella exclaimed. "If we put some ice on it and put more rouge on the other cheek to match I bet no-one will notice… Claire, could you find some ice?"

Claire gratefully took the opportunity to leave the room and get away from the freaking out bride. Bella moved close to Esme and pressed her thumb over the angry pimple, letting her natural coldness work as an ice pack.

"Oh that feels so much better!" Esme gasped.

Bella laughed. "Are you okay? This is kind of a big reaction to a pimple."

"I'm fine…" Esme took a deep breath and blew it out. "I guess I'm just so self conscious around your family anyway and this pushed me over the edge."

"Self conscious?" Bella frowned.

"Seriously, Bella? You're the most beautiful people alive, you could make a painter cry. Especially your cousins."

"Oh yeah, the Denali sisters are truly something else," Bella laughed. "But you don't need to worry about that, Esme. We're so used to what vampires look like we don't see any real beauty in it. Character, scent, a lack of disfiguring scars - that's what we find attractive. But you'll know that soon enough."

Esme cleared her throat and pulled away, smiling awkwardly as she inspected the much calmer pimple in the mirror.

"I think that helped!"

"Good!"

Claire came back in with ice a few minutes later and together they helped Esme finish with her dress, hair and makeup before they had to go to the church.

Bella was at the point in her life where she had been to more weddings in the past than in the future. She'd been to Garrett and Kate's (for the second time), the occasional one of a human friend, and had gatecrashed many random weddings during her nomadic years. They were all much of a muchness if she was honest. It wasn't until the later half of the 20th century that weddings became very interesting.

Esme's white wedding dress was beautiful, mainly because she was the one wearing it. They married at the local church with the whole congregation watching. Bella stood as a bridesmaid while Jasper and Peter were groomsmen. Peter tried to pull faces at her over Carlisle's shoulder but she barely noticed, she was too busy looking at his smile. That was something she recognised; even with everything she may have changed, the smile Carlisle had when he looked at his wife was the same.

The party was held at the local hall, full of food and drinks all paid for by the illustrious and proud Mr Platt. Every vampire in the room was on edge, the food that must have been delicious to all the humans stunk of sewage to them and the constant threat of someone hurting themselves had them all keeping an eye on each other in case anyone needed to be escorted out. Garrett and Laurent positioned themselves outside, far away from temptation even though both had taken to the diet quite well.

Bella stayed near Claire, her role as a teenage girl meant she didn't have a part to play in many of the conversations surrounding her, and her family were all stuck talking to people they knew from work. The Denali sisters had been pulled into constant conversations since they walked in, every girl wanted to know their beauty secrets.

The room was vibrating with a constant hum of conversation, even drowning out the soft violin music played by a quartet on the stage. Bella's vampire brain picked up on every word, logging it away somewhere in her infinite memory without her consent. She couldn't help but note Dr Charles Evenson standing by the bar, a martini in his hand and gesturing with the other as he told some boring story to another boring man. She struggled to look away from him, some primal urge trying to force her to keep an eye on the threat.

Dinner was served, a buffet so the vampires in the room might be able to more subtly get away with not eating. Claire dragged Bella along to the food where she picked up a plateful, and Bella found something dry she could easily hide in a pocket later. They found a table in the corner and sat, that's when Esme found them.

"Hello!" she gasped, cheeks pink with excitement. "Are you two enjoying the party?"

"Of course," Claire grinned. "Are you enjoying yourself, Mrs Cullen?"

Esme giggled and sat down beside them, taking both of their hands and squeezing them with all her might.

"It's so strange, isn't it? I'm married! My life has completely changed in one day!"

"Oh don't make me jealous!" said Claire. "You two are going to the lovely Cullen house tonight where you can do whatever you want whenever you want! I'm still trapped with my mother until she convinces some man to whisk me off my feet."

"Someone will come along!" Esme insisted.

"Maybe," Claire hummed. "I think she has her eye on Dr Evenson, so a younger man needs to come around soon."

"What?" Bella frowned. "You and Dr Evenson?"

"Oh everyone knows he's wanted a new wife since his last one died," said Claire. "He's got a well paid, respectable job. My mother doesn't care about trivial things like age gaps and personality."

Bella's treacherous ears tuned into Evenson's conversation across the room. He wasn't talking about anything of note, but the nasally tone of his voice made her skin crawl and the idea of subjecting anyone else to a life with him made her chest hurt. She needed to do something about him. Soon.

"Claire, I can't get my brooch to sit right. Can you help?" Esme asked, ignorant of Bella's plotting.

Claire pulled off her glove and went to help her with the pin. Bella saw it as if in slow motion, as she fumbled and the pin pierced the skin of her thumb. Blood welled up beneath the surface of the skin, turning it a deeper red until eventually it bubbled up to the surface. Just a drop, it was only a drop.

Claire hissed and put her thumb in her mouth but it was too late. Bella was so on edge about everything else she hadn't been bracing herself for the scent of blood. She couldn't stop staring. She wanted it. Just a drop, only a drop. A drop couldn't hurt. One girl couldn't hurt. She had been so good, she hadn't had human blood in years. One girl wouldn't be so bad.

"Bella?"

It was Esme. Bella forced herself back to the present. She was frowning at her in concern, probably noticing how still she had gotten, how she'd stopped breathing, how the handkerchief she had been holding and the palms of her gloves had disintegrated into dust in her clenched fist. Only a second, maybe two, had passed but Jasper was already halfway across the hall towards her.

Claire was still bleeding, Bella could smell it.

She had to get out of there.

"Sorry," she said with what little breath she already had in her lungs. "I think I need some air."

"I'll come with you!" Esme offered.

"No! No, you should stay." Bella forced a smile, she didn't have enough air to say anything else so she just gave a firm nod, got up, and walked at a forced human pace to the entrance.

"Good afternoon little traveller!" Garrett greeted her with a smile. "Enjoying the party?"

She nodded before taking a careful breath of clean outside air. It was untainted so she took another deeper one, imagining it could calm the relentless burning in her throat.

Laurent winced. "Someone bleeding?"

"Just a pinprick," she whispered, stripping off her ruined gloves and tossing them into the bushes. "I'll be fine."

With a few more deep clean breaths she came back to herself. Garrett and Laurent watched her in concern, God how embarrassing.

She sighed. "I haven't had to do that for a while."

"You're very good at it," Garrett smiled. "Don't be too disheartened, Bella. I'm always so impressed with your control. We go to gatherings like this all the time, don't mistake me, but to see humans every day? Without having fed first? It's incredible you haven't slipped, and to think you're going to be living with one?"

"I would never hurt Esme," Bella said. "Even if she were bleeding in front of me I could pull myself back. Besides, she won't be human for long."

"She's finally decided to turn, has she?"

"What do you mean finally?" Bella frowned. "Of course she's turning, she has to turn."

Laurent shrugged. "Not necessarily. Carlisle said she's still making her decision, she may choose to stay human."

"But… she can't marry a vampire and stay human. That's ridiculous!"

"I don't know," Garrett gave her a little half smile that was probably intended to be comforting. "She'd be fairly safe, with Peter's hybrid diet the only ones she'd be in any danger from is you and Jasper. As you said, you'd never hurt her and I'm sure Jasper would be willing to supplement with human for sixty years or so."

Bella's mind flashed back to a vague image that had stuck from her human days, when she'd cut her finger and Jasper had lunged for her throat. How strange, to think of a time when he didn't love her yet.

"Besides," Garrett continued. "Carlisle has the control of a Franciscan monk. If your Edward had the control not to kill you in the marital act I'm sure he will have no trouble."

"I…" Bella's ears started ringing. "What?"

"You were in a romantic relationship with a vampire when you were human, weren't you?" Laurent asked. "Irina said that's how the circumstances of your change came about, and that morals in your time were very different."

"I mean, yeah… but no, we didn't… when I was human… I…" Bella took another deep breath and tried to think clearly, focusing on the surrealness of Laurent asking her about this helped. "I'd rather not think about Carlisle doing… that. It doesn't matter anyway, if Esme doesn't turn she'll die."

"We'll all die someday, Bella." Garrett grinned. "No matter how long lived we are, there's an angry nomad or a crowd of humans with pitchforks and torches waiting for us some day."

"Or the Volturi!" Laurent joked.

"Or werewolves…" Bella couldn't help but mutter.

"Werewolves!" Garrett laughed. "Imagine! What a way to go! If I have a choice, give me that."

With that, the conversation turned into what the best way to die is and Bella quietly excused herself to go back to the party. It had all continued to go smoothly in her absence, she couldn't hear any mutterings about the groom's sister doing anything inhuman.

Peter smoothly disengaged himself from the women he was chatting with and came to her.

"Are you alright?"

Bella nodded. "Just got taken by surprise. Esme and Claire weren't scared were they?"

"No," he smiled. "Claire didn't notice anything, and Esme was remarkably calm about it. She'll need to get used to that kind of thing after all."

Bella hummed noncommittally, the conversation from outside still echoing in her head.

"Still, I should apologise to her."

He told her she didn't need to, but she wasn't listening and set straight off to where Esme stood beside Carlisle and the Denalis.

She took her hand and lead her to a quiet corner. "I'm so sorry about what happened before."

"Oh no, don't worry at all!" Esme squeezed her hand back. "Are you okay? I told Claire you were scared of blood when she asked where you went."

"I'm fine," Bella said. "It just happens sometimes."

She then noticed Esme's expression, the tightness of her smile and the slight redness in her eyes.

"Are you okay? You look sad."

Esme laughed, "I can never get away with anything around you lot. I'm alright, just Tanya invited us to stay with them for a while after we move away from here and I remembered that eventually we'll have to move far away and never come back. I realised that I'll miss my mother, I suppose. As silly and meddling as she is."

Bella smiled in a way she hoped was reassuring, but she really didn't know what to say. She knew something about missing mothers, but it was not the time to express that to Esme.

Esme kept speaking but Bella didn't actively listen, too busy trying to school her facial expression into something calm and happy. The kind of face a sister should have when her brother marries her closest friend. She heard Jasper's footsteps coming up behind her and for the first time in months she could think of no person she'd rather be near.

He touched her wrist and immediately filled her with calm and warmth. He smiled at Esme.

"Your mother's looking for you, something about the cake."

"Oh!" Esme grinned and immediately set off across the room.

Jasper squeezed Bella's arm. "Come dance so it doesn't look strange for me to touch you."

She nodded and let herself be lead to the dance floor, where everyone was doing the polka. He held her hand tight and rubbed his thumb soothingly over hers.

"I wont ask you if you're okay," he murmured as they started moving to the music. "You've already been asked three times and lied every time."

"I'll be fine," she said, willing it not to be a lie. "Everything will fall into place eventually."

His eyes were intense on her face, but she forced herself not to meet them. She selfishly enjoyed his closeness, the feeling of his hand in hers and on her waist, his familiar comforting scent. She let him calm her the way he had for the last thirty years and for a moment made herself forget that she had to throw it all away. She danced with Jasper until the party ended, and began to mourn again the second his hands left hers.